Meet Me on Thames St.

I walked into the room to see Chase laying on his bed, looking up at the ceiling.

I closed the door behind me.

“Are you okay?”

“Just swell” he says sarcastically

“Do you want me to leave?”

“No”

“That girl you like, when did you start liking her?” I swallow

“Since I met her, but I’m realizing now that I need her more than ever.” He looks me in the eye

He liked Tara even when he was dating me. My heart was snapping. I didn’t show that I dying inside, though.

“If you dated her, would it ruin friendships?”

“Probably, it would change everything.”

I nod “That would kill Eric.”

He looked at me quizzically “Why would that be?”

“I doubt he’d be okay with you liking Tara.”

“You think I like Tara?” he laughs

“It makes sense you told me a girl you’ve known for a long time. You don’t even acknowledge
Eric lately, and when they are together you get angry.” I explain

“Eric and I just grew apart lately.” He explains

I nod. He is so bullshitting.

“I just think Tara can do better.” He shrugs

“Okay.”

“What’s going through your mind, right now?” he questions

“Nothing.” I shrug

“Stop giving me one worded answers!” he says getting annoyed

“Would you rather I lecture you some long drawn out thing? Sometimes I don’t have much to say.”

“No, I want you to answer me, because you want to. I don’t want you to feel obligated. When
you only say one word, I feel like don’t know how much I care. Your opinion matters to me.”

“Like you honestly care what I think………….” I mumble

“Is that seriously what you think?”

There was a silence.

“I need to show you something.” He says pulling out a box from underneath his bed

He handed the box to me. I started at it then back at him.

“Open it” he motioned

I took the top off the box and my jaw dropped. Notes I wrote him during class in high school. Birthday Cards I wrote. The page I wrote in his yearbook was even placed in there. There were newspaper article clippings. Articles I have written in the past year. The articles I wrote after he left.

“Why do you have these?” I ask overcome by emotion

“Like I said what you say matters to me. It always has. You always mattered. You saved me. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. I would be in All Souls Cemetery, right now. I would have died on that December night on Blacksville Bridge.”

****Flashback***

I couldn’t find him anywhere. He called me a mess this morning. He said I love you and hung up. It’s been a month since Jake died. I know he’s been blaming himself. I could almost feel something was wrong. He never said I love you. Why would he say it over the phone unless he planned on doing something risky?

That’s when it hit me. This all happened on Blacksville Bridge. If that’s where it started, that’s where he would end it. I quickly got in the car and drove there. As I drove I looked at the treacherous river alongside the road. The rapids were rough and there were many rocks and boulders. The December temperature made the water cold and freezing. I stopped the car before the bridge and got out. I was right. He stood on the bridge staring down at the rapids below him.

“Chase!” I scream standing in the middle of the bridge

“Go away”

“Don’t do it.” I choke

“I should’ve been with him that day. This wouldn’t have happened” he says looking at the water

“What happened to Jake was an accident, but you would’ve died too. You couldn’t change what happened.”

“I’m the older brother, I’m supposed to protect him. I failed. I deserve to die. He was the good one, he had a future. I should have died, not him. He never even drank much. It was one party. It was one mistake. I’m the one who should have been in that car.”

“This isn’t your fault. Nobody deserves to die. Please, don’t do this.” I sob

“I’m sorry.” He says finally looking at me

“I lost my mom on this bridge, we lost Jake on this bridge. Please don’t do this. You won’t change anything by doing this.” I fight

“I love you.”

I sob “You know what? Do what you want, but remember this. Killing yourself won’t bring back Jake. It’ll just cause more pain to everyone you love.”

He looked pained. He ran over and hugged me so tightly it felt like he’ll never let go.

“I just want the pain to stop.” He sobbed still holding me tightly

“I know, I know.”