A Lifetime to Struggle

One Person Screaming Match.

"Was that really necessary?" I asked, closing the front door behind me, just coming back from dropping Natalia and Delaney off back at the University.
"Was what what?" Matt asked from upstairs.
"Hitting on my friends!" I called back to him.
"Pretty much." Matt said so calmly. I didn't bother to take off my shoes as i ran up stairs.
I found Matt's room, and saw him sitting there on his chair, staring at the computer screen.
Well this explains why he was so calm.
I leaned again his door frame, watching him read whatever it was on his screen.
"Whacha' reading?" I asked.
Matt took a minuet before replying. " An interview we did not to long ago."
"Oh. Cool." I said, not really caring. I didn't want to sound shallow, but I never found much interest in they're interviews, photo shoots or any of that. I guess it was because I had already grew up with them, I didn't need to be around them all 24/7 anymore.
The rock star life style wasn't for me anyways.
"They took our words and twisted them right up." Matt sighed.
"Yeah, they'll do that." I said in the same tone as him. "Have you noticed Brian acting a little strange lately?"
The words just spilled right out of my mouth. I couldn't stop them. I didn't even know I was thinking them!
Matt turned in his chair, and gave me a confused look of which included his eye brows merging together.
"No..Why?" He asked.
I shrugged, not having an answer planned out.
"I dunno. He just seem's.... Different." I stated.
Matt shook his head and turned back to the screen. I let out a silent sigh, and turned to leave the room, only to find myself running into what I thought was the wall.
"Whoa Harmony, in my bubble much?" Brian asked. I looked up at him, to see a giant smirk plastered on his face.
"Shut up." I said, pushing him away from me. I traveled down the hall, hearing a few mummers from behind me. I forced my brain to think about something else. Anything. Next thing I knew, i was stopped out front of Jimmy's door.
"Jimmy?" I croaked, my voice suddenly becoming raspy.
"Harmony?" He answered back.
"Can I come in?"
The door swung open, and a shirtless Jimmy stood there.
"Yeah I guess so." He smiled, moving aside as i walked in.
"What can I help you with little shit?"
I sat down on his bed, as he shut the door, and sat on the ground. Legs sprawled out in front of him, arms holding him up.
"I just wanted to hang out." I said.
" Of course you did." Jimmy nodded.
"I did"
"Uh huh.."
"Really, i swear. Can you stop pretending you know everything?"
Jimmy raised and eyebrow at me. I realized how fast and crude that came out, and made a quick apology.
"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean for that to come out so harsh." But before I could fully finish, Jimmy was chuckling to himself.
"You don't have to feel so bad for getting a little mad at me Harm. It's normal." Jimmy dropped onto his back, and laid his tattooed arms on his tattooed chest.
"I know, it's just, you didn't do anything wrong. I'm just.." I paused trying to find the right word.
"Pissed?" He asked.
"Frustrated." I replied.
"And what is frustrating you?" Jimmy asked, sounding like I was talking to a therapist.
"Brian." I replied.
Jimmy nodded his head slowly.
"Doesn't surprised me." Jimmy sighed and sat up again. He picked himself up off the floor and sat next to me on the bed.
"I shouldn't have told you that he was looking at you like that. That was a mistake."
I looked at Jimmy, about to argue how it was in fact not a bad thing. But he stopped me.
"If you didn't notice, you didn't care. You would have been able to move along, not have a single clue what his deal was."
I opened my mouth to argue again, but Jimmy slapped his skinny hand over it.
"Avoiding him all week though is only making your problem worse. Now, you can approached this problem head on, tell him he's a pig, ew go away." Jimmy stated. "Or you can pretend as if I never told you."
I looked up at Jimmy. I wanted to tell him about my thought's on Brian. How i was seeing him a bit differently. I wanted him to tell me it was just a phase.
"Yeah but, I've kind of... been seeing Brian... you know. That way." I replied.
Jimmy squinted at me, not fully understanding.
"Get it?" I asked.
Jimmy looked up at the ceiling, something he did when he was trying to process a thought. Suddenly his head came snapping back down, his eye's staring wildly at me.
"You what!?" He exclaimed.
" I think it's just a phase though!" I said quickly, before Jimmy started to assume it was something serious.
"I mean, best friend's who are opposite genders think of each other like that at least once at some point!"
"No no no no no." Jimmy stated. "I've never thought about you that way Harm. Johnny hasn't, Zacky... well, I can't say for sure. But I KNOW i've never thought of you like that." Jimmy jumped off the bed.
"It happens in movies!" I argued.
"Exactly! Movies!"
I sat quietly on the bed. The way i'd planed this out in my head was definitely not what was happening right now.
"Harm, as much as you think it may be harmless.." Jimmy started.
I knew exactly where he was going with this. I felt a bit of anger bubble in me.
" It could be serious. You guy's have always been close. Once upon a time, you were closer then you and me. It makes sense if you--"
"No!" I shouted.
Jimmy froze in his spot. Blinking at me, confused at the fact that I had just yelled. But it was to late for me to stop, I was already going.
" No it doesn't make sense! Nothing fucking makes sense! Everything has to be so fucking confusing! There is no simple answer to anything right? It's always gotta be some sort of stupid difficult problem.
Especially with you guys! If something out of the ordinary happens to me, you think it's the worst possible thing! You treat me like i'm dying or something! It's fine for everyone else! But when Harmony experiences something normal, I must not be okay! God, you guys are so.. so. Stupid!" I shouted, jumping off Jimmy's bed and heading towards the door.
"Harm--" But before Jimmy could finish, I had slammed the door. So hard i felt the floor shake beneath me.
"What the hell is going on?" Matt asked, coming out of his room with Brian.
Normally I would have laughed at them, asking them what they were doing in there together. But i was far to pissed off to think of anything humorous.
"Harmony?" He asked.
"Don't talk to me." I replied viciously, shoving my way past him as he tried to grab me.
"Harmony what happened?" He asked, following me down the stairs.
"Can you just go away?" I asked.
"I just want to help" He said, feeling a bit hurt.
" I don't want your fucking help!" I shouted, finding my bedroom door. " I don't want anyone's fucking help, just leave me alone!" I added, when i realized Brian, Zacky and Johnny were downstairs with us.
I slammed my door in Matt's face. Staying there for a few moment before i went down into my bedroom, ready to cry my heart out.

♠ ♠ ♠

How odd of Harmony to do such a thing hrm?
Thought adding some drama in there would help :3
Thank you to the comments, Subs, and readers !