Nothing Is Ever Simple

AMELIA

Amelia was feeling much better now that she and Johnny had cleared the air. The lingering guilt was still there but now that she had convinced herself that it had just been a drunken kiss between close friends she was able to get on with the task at hand; the 24 hour takeover.

They were already closing in to twelve hours of filming and needless to say things were starting to get out of hand. Steve-O had become increasingly out of control and the MTV heads had been given no choice but to remove him from the building. Amelia was worried about her friend and had wanted to go with him but Bam had insisted she stay with him in the studio. Meanwhile, Pontius and Dave had been naked for the past few hours and Amelia was sure she would go blind if she saw another penis in the same room.

Bam and Dunn were preoccupied with attempting dangerous stunts and getting wasted so Amelia left them to it. In fact, other than the crew, Johnny seemed to be the only one with any sense of self control tonight. He was running the show and it was working. Amelia smiled proudly as she watched him talking animatedly to the camera. He was cool, confident and dare she admit it, gorgeous. No wonder he was such a hit with the female fans; not even his best friend could keep her eyes off him. Amelia tried to shake this thought form her mind as she was reminded of her wedding night. She was temporarily distracted by Bam sauntering over to her off camera.

"Hey babe." She smiled, going to kiss him but he side stepped her and motioned for her to pass him a beer. Reluctantly she passed him a bottle from the cooler and looked at him expectantly.

"Bam?" she continued, but he had already turned on his heel and headed back on camera to Dunn, where Amelia heard him comment on what he would like to do to one of the female production runners.

Amelia wasn't quite sure what had come over her, perhaps it was the combination of being simultaneously ignored and hearing her husband talk about other women that made her stride over to Bam and pour two bottles of beer over his head with the cameras still rolling.

"I hope you'll be very happy with the runner." She spat, as calmly as possible.

"Amelia!" Bam yelled, but she had already stormed off.

She could hear his footsteps behind her but someone, she assumed Jeff or Rick, intervened and she was allowed to make her way out of the building with no interference. She continued storming until she was out if the building and in the rear parking lot. They hadn't driven to the studios themselves, so she couldn't simply jump in the car and drive off; she was stuck here for at least a short while. Deciding to find Steve-O, she walked the length of the car park and found herself on a narrow backstreet. Had she been thinking clearly she would have realised that this was a bad idea, but her mind was currently preoccupied with furious thoughts towards her husband.

They alleyway was dimly lit and it was a cold autumn night. She wondered how long it would be until sunrise, it was some ungodly hour of the morning but there was no sign of sunrise just yet. She continued walking until she saw the warm glow of street lights at the end of the alleyway. With a goal in mind she picked up her pace. The lights grew closer and she focused her eyes on them when all of a sudden a figure appeared at the entrance to the alley and Amelia felt her heart skip a beat. She was too far away to make out any features of the shadowy stranger but she could tell they were making their way towards her. Amelia stopped dead in her tracks, frozen by fear. She couldn't bring herself to run and as the figure drew closer she inhaled sharply, afraid of what came next.

To her horror, anguish and ultimately relief, the shadowy figure turned out to be Steve-O. Now that he was closer she could recognise him and she approached him feeling light headed from the fear. Steve looked worse for wear. He had obviously been continuing his bender and it was not a pretty sight.

"Hey 'Melia." He slurred, embracing her in a tight hug. She could smell the alcohol on his breath and he struggled to balance on his own two feet.

"Hey Steve, how are you feeling?" she asked, now supporting the full weight of his body.

"Fucking awesome!" he laughed, letting her go and swaying from side to side.

"Well you don't look it." She admitted, shaking her head a little in concern. "You wanna go get coffee or something?" Amelia had no experience of caring for someone as fucked up as Steve was right now, but she had no intention of letting him out of her sight in his condition. Coffee was probably not the best idea considering his hyperactivity of a few hours ago, but Amelia was in desperate need of a pick me up and wanted to get out of the cold. Luckily there was a coffee shop at the end of the alleyway that was still open and Amelia ushered Steve-O into the building.

They both collapsed at the nearest table and in the bright light of the shop Amelia was able to examine her friend's face clearly. His eyes were red and puffy and he was grinding his teeth in an almost nervous fashion. He watched her silently with an almost manic expression on his face and it actually frightened Amelia to see him like this. Johnny had warned her of how bad his addiction was getting.

The lone waitress brought over two steaming mugs of black coffee and Amelia was thankful for her lack of questions. Perhaps she didn't recognise Steve in his current state. Amelia took a big sip of the coffee and just the bitter taste put a spring back in her step. Fuck Bam, fuck him. She was not going to let him make her life miserable.

"What's up 'Meels?" Steve asked, now looking at her more calmly than he had all evening. Perhaps the coffee was doing the trick for him too.

"Nothing." She forced a smile, not wanting to bother him with her domestic problems. She hated fighting with Bam around the other guys. She was always slightly worried that they would take his side and see her as a moaning woman rather than one of them.

"Something's obviously up, otherwise you'd still be in the studio filming, not sat in this shitty little joint drinking coffee with your bud Steve-O."

Amelia laughed and was encouraged by the fact that Steve's eyes had returned to their natural size and colour. "Well I didn't get kicked out." She joked.

"Aw man, and there was me thinking you'd staged a protest for me." He grinned, swigging down the remains of his mug and ordering another one.

"I did consider it." She laughed truthfully, still aware of the concerned look on his face. "It's nothing really. Bam and I just had a fight."

"Ah Bam's a fucking dick 'Meels." Steve croaked, shaking his head in disapproval. "He's my friend but I have no fucking idea what you see in him." Steve folded his arms as if to make his point clear.

Amelia sighed. "All we seem to do is argue since the wedding. It's like he's just lost interest now he's got what he wanted."

Steve nodded. "Sounds about right." At the look of despair on Amelia's face, Steve reached across the table and squeezed her hands.

"I keep getting this horrible feeling that I've rushed into everything and made a huge mistake." She admitted as she squeezed his hand back. It suddenly struck her that the only person she had shared these feelings with before had been Johnny and he had convinced her to go ahead with the wedding, so why was she now confiding in Steve?

"Hey look at me! I'm the king of mistakes!" Steve grinned.

Amelia smiled weakly. Steve was a good listener despite whatever faults he may possess. Amelia knew she could trust him, and finally opening up to him felt like a weight had been lifted. "I told Johnny I was having doubts before the wedding but he told me to go ahead with it."

Steve let out a raspy laugh, which rapidly turned into a cough. "Knoxville is as much of a twat as your fucking husband." He said, pulling out a cigarette and placing in between his chapped lips as he lit it. He offered one to Amelia who accepted, raising an eyebrow to his comment. "I know why he told you to go ahead with it. He's a dick. He's fucking in love with you but he thought that once you got married to Bam he'd be able to move on cos he wouldn't have a chance with you."

Amelia's eyes widened in disbelief. She could not tell whether or not Steve was telling the truth or if this was just his drug fuelled interpretation of it, but what he said had struck a nerve. "Johnny kissed me on my wedding night." She mumbled quietly.

Now Steve's eyes widened and he rolled the cigarette along his bottom lip. "Fuck."

Amelia nodded. "I kissed him back. I don't know why. I love Bam. I really do. It's just Johnny...I don't know. He's my best friend..." she struggled to find the words. "We've barely spoken since then and I hate it. I miss him but it's almost like I can't trust myself around him anymore. I really can't explain it." She realised that she had never actually confronted these feelings head on before, let alone with someone else. Johnny was her best friend. How could he possibly harbour any kind of romantic feelings towards her? She had assumed he had been wasted on her wedding night.

"One day you'll both wake up and smell the coffee." Steve laughed.

"Steve, I've not told this to anyone else. But I know I can trust you."

Steve returned his hand to hers and rubbed it gently. "I've got your back dude."

Amelia smiled a little and took a deep drag of nicotine. She tried to stop thinking about Bam and Johnny and how upset she was but even Steve cracking jokes couldn't distract her for long. The anger and hurt was building up inside her, ready to erupt without notice. She finished her coffee and cigarette and decided she needed a different release. She was in perfect company. "Fuck coffee let's get wasted."

Steve needed no persuasion and without hesitation they stood up and left the shop in search of alcohol. The coffee had not warmed Amelia enough for the cold outdoors and seeing her shiver, Steve pulled off his grey hoody and dressed her in it instead. Amelia smiled gratefully and arm in arm they made their way along the street.

"Fuck it's like four in the morning!" exclaimed Steve-O, his teeth chattering from the icy wind.

"I wonder what they're up to now." Amelia muttered, voicing her thoughts unintentionally. Steve seemed not to hear.

"Bingo!" he shouted, pointing to a neon sign some way down the road. Amelia could just make it out and followed Steve towards the bar. Before they had managed to cross the road Amelia found herself being tackled from behind by a strong figure. She started to let out a scream before her assailant span her round. It was Johnny.

"Fuck Amelia! Where have you been! We were worried!"

To answer his question she pointed towards Steve who seemed unfazed by Johnny's appearance and thoroughly more concerned with the quest for alcohol. Johnny grabbed Steve's arm to stop him from wandering off.

"Oh hey Knoxville." Steve laughed, embracing his friend. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Looking for you two." Johnny told him patiently. "Come on; let's go back to the studio."

Both Amelia and Steve shook their heads. "I can't Johnny." Amelia sighed. "I don't want to see him."

"Be that as it may, we have a show to do and it's not safe for you to be wandering the streets."

Amelia wanted to protest. She wanted Johnny to get angry. She wanted to make him mad at her but she couldn't explain why. Realising she needed him on her side however, she thought better of this and kept her lips tightly sealed. Steve on the other hand, had no objections to staging a protest but soon found himself being ushered into a taxi by Johnny.

Seeing that Steve-O had sufficiently sobered up and calmed down, the MTV heads decided to let him back in the studio, but before Amelia could follow him back on set, Johnny pulled her to one side.

"Are you ok?" he asked, looking her up and down as if to search for injury.

Feeling self conscious under his wandering eye, Amelia ran a finger under each eye to remove any tear smudged makeup. "Yes." She lied, desperate to remove herself from his overbearing presence.

Johnny put a hand on her cheek and tilted her head up towards his own. She was powerless to resist and found herself staring into his soft brown eyes. The sensation of his hand against her cheek always surprised her. His skin was much softer than Bam's.

"Promise?" he whispered, dipping his head closer to hers.

Amelia gulped, feeling her stomach somersault and shook her head silently. She could feel tears welling up and couldn't understand why she was losing it now in front of Johnny when she had been calm in comparison with Steve.

"I didn't think so." Johnny replied, removing his hand from her face. He replaced it on her hand and led her further backstage where they found themselves in an abandoned office. "When you're ready to talk I'll be listening." Johnny told her, taking a seat at the back of the room.

Amelia bit her lip, keeping her distance. She didn't know where to start and how much she needed to tell him. Once upon a time she would have had no qualms about spilling her hearts out to Johnny but things had become complicated over the past few months. She started to tell Johnny about her arguments with Bam and as she admitted her doubts about the wedding she found herself dropping weakly into a chair opposite him. By now her tears were falling freely and rapidly.

Johnny approached her in one swift movement and before she could resist he had pulled her into his arms as tightly as he could. As she breathed in the scent of his aftershave she was reminded of a time a year ago when they had found themselves in a similar situation. It had resulted in a stolen kiss and many unspoken words.

Amelia felt so close to Johnny and wished she could melt into him and hide away. Her body was reacting strangely to his touch. She could feel her heart pounding through her rib cage and her lips were becoming dry. As her pulse and mind raced she remembered what Steve had said in the coffee shop. She couldn't see Johnny's face but she wondered what he was thinking right now.