You Know That I'm Better in the End

***1 MONTH LATER, END OF AUGUST***

The past month has been "trying" for me, to say the least. Nothing's been easy since the day Trav and I came home. Travis has been acting out on me for the past 3 weeks. The first week we were home, he was nothing like himself; he was quiet and mainly stayed in his room. Now, he's just causing hell for me and making me pull my hair out. And it's much more difficult to deal with him, now that I don't have Andy here, or Ronnie.

I know he misses his Dad, and he's still upset with me with the fact I literally dragged him off the tour, but I also know he misses Andy, because whenever Ronnie was off doing a tour or whatever, he was like another father figure to him. Travis needs that, and he doesn't have it right now, so he's acting out on me.

I've had my mom come over to try and help me, but it never really worked for long. And while I love him no matter what, I don't want my brother to help because I know his stupid ass is back on whatever drugs he's hooked on. And to be honest with you, I really don't have anyone else to help me at the moment.

Trav talks to Ronnie every day on the phone, and whenever he does, he goes back to being the sweet little boy he used to be just a short time ago. But, once they're done talking and Daddy has to hang up, it's back to being a terror. Ronnie knows he's acting out, because I've told him. I told him when it first started, and I've been telling him it's been getting worse as the month went on. But him and I both know it's because he misses his Dad, and he has no other guy to have "boy time" with. And Ronnie keeps assuring me that when he gets home, Travis will be back to normal again.

But goddammit, Ronnie can't get home fast enough.

"Travis, I told you to clean your room." I sighed as I opened the door to my son's room and saw that it still looked like an F5 had blown through it. "Over an hour ago."

"I didn't want to." He said simply as he sat on his bed, playing with some action figures.

"Well you need to." I said sternly. "Now." He looked up at me, his little eyes narrowed at me angrily. "I don't want to!"

"Travis, you need to listen to me and clean your room." I crossed my arms over my chest. "If you don't, you're going to bed an hour earlier and you're not getting any dessert after dinner tonight."

"I don't care!" He yelled, shoving all his toys off of his bed and onto the ground, contributing to the mess that was already there. "I don't want to clean! Go away!"

"TRAVIS, DO NOT TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!" I snapped. I walked over and picked him up off the bed, to which he squirmed around and tried to fight with me for doing, and I set him on the ground on his feet. Kneeling down, I grabbed his chin tightly, but not tight enough to hurt him, just enough to let him know I was not having this right now. "You do not talk to me like that, and you do not shove your toys on the ground like that. You listen to me when I tell you to do something, and you obey me. Do you understand?" His face held an angry expression, his eyes looking exactly like Ronnie's when he was angry; almost black.

"No!" He yelled, pushing me away from him and running out of the room. I groaned and ran after him. "Travis Joseph Radke!" I yelled. "Do you want to be put in time out!?"

"Go away!" He screamed, running away from me. I stomped after him, grabbing him from behind. "You need to stop acting like this RIGHT NOW!" He screamed and thrashed around as I struggled to carry him back into his bedroom.

"I HATE YOU!" He screamed as I set him down on his bed, his little hands pushing me away. It felt like someone stabbed me right in the heart, and had punched me right in the stomach at the same time. He sat there, staring up at me angrily through his eye lashes. I turned around and quickly walked out, shutting his door behind me. I sobbed quietly and hurried to get my phone before I became so hysterical that Ronnie wouldn't understand a word I was saying.

I dialed his number and held the phone to my ear, slumping down into a chair at the table as I cried.

"Hello-" I answered him by sobbing. "Scar? What's wrong?"

"Travis is what's wrong!" I screamed, starting to cry harder. "I can't take it anymore, Ronnie!!"

"What'd he do now?" He asked quietly, and I heard some noise in the background fading and something close, signaling that he went into another area or room or where-ever the hell he was, to talk to me privately.

"I-I told him he n-n-needed to c-clean his room for the s-second time t-t-today," I hiccuped in the middle of my sentence, then sobbed again. "and he won't LISTEN to me! He k-kept saying he didn't want to, and he didn't c-care, and he told me to go away, a-and-"

I couldn't say the last thing he said to me, as I started crying too hard at the thought of it. "Scarlet, calm down," Ronnie said softly. "I know he's acting out on you really bad right now, but I'm gonna be home in 2 days and-"

"He said h-he hated me, Ronnie!" I wailed. "My son fucking told me he HATED me!!" He was quiet for a few seconds before speaking again. "You know he doesn't mean that, Scar."

"I think he does!" I cried. "He hasn't told me an "I love you" in I don't know HOW long, Ronnie!" I wiped at my eyes, effectively smudging my eye makeup all over my hand and face. "I can't handle him, he's too much for me right now! I don't have any help, my mom's tried to help and it didn't work, and you know that, and I-I can't handle him!!"

"Alright, first thing is you need to calm down, Scarlet," I sobbed as he said that, and he kept quietly telling me to calm down and to stop crying. "Have him stay the night at your Mom's tonight, alright? That way both of you can calm down." I nodded to myself, wiping at my eyes more. "Go get him and let me talk to him."

I stood up slowly and headed for Trav's room. I opened the door to see him laying on his bed doing nothing, and walked in, handing him the phone silently before walking back put again to cry.

* * *

***Ronnie's POV***

"Travis?" I asked, biting my bottom lip.

"Hi Daddy!" I smiled as my son chirped at me, sounding happy.

"Hey buddy!" I exclaimed. I wasn't going to yell at him, I knew why he was acting this way, and yelling at a 5 year old really wouldn't help get my point across any better than speaking calmly about it. "What're you doing?"

"Sittin' in my room." He said simply.

"Does it look like a hurricane went through there?" I asked, laughing slightly He giggled. "It's not THAT messy!"

"Riiiiiight!" He giggled more, making my smile grow. "Momma told me you didn't wanna clean?"

"No, I don't like it." He said simply, sounding a bit less happy.

"No one likes cleaning, Trav." I laughed. "Maybe you should try cleaning while talking to me on the phone? That way you've got something distracting you from the boring-ness of cleaning." He giggled again. "OK!"

"So, I hear you had a little fight with Momma just now."

"Yeah," He said quietly. My smiled faded. "Why'd that happen?"

"'Cause I didn't wanna clean," He mumbled. "And she yelled at me."

"Did she yell at you because you didn't want to clean, or because of something else?"

"Somefin' else." He mumbled even lower. I sat down in my bunk and smiled sadly. "What was it?"

"I 'frew muh toys on the ground and ran out of my room, and told her to go away." I frowned when I noticed his voice change a little, and I could tell he was starting to cry.

"Did you tell her something else?" I asked. He responded with a very quiet "yeah". "What'd you say?"

"I hate you." I rubbed a hand over my face and sighed quietly. "Are you mad at me, Daddy?" He asked, sounding more choked up.

"No, bud," I whispered. "I know why you're acting like this, and I know it's hard right now. But you can't take it out on Mom, because she's having a rough time too."

"She doesn't like me anymore, does she?" He whimpered. I closed my eyes, swallowing the small lump growing in my throat. "Of course she likes you, Trav. She loves you, she always will no matter if you guys fight or anything. But you hurt her feelings really bad."

"I didn't mean to!" He cried.

"I know you didn't, don't cry." I said softly. It broke my heart right now to know how sad my son was, and that I couldn't be there for him right now to help him. It was the most helpless feeling ever. "But you gotta be nice to Momma. She's upset about her and Andy breaking up still, and she's really stressed out."

"What's dat mean?" I chuckled a little. "Stressed out?"

"Mm-hm."

"It means when you worry a lot about something. Like, a lot a lot."

"Oh." He said quietly. "She's worrying 'bout Andy?"

"Yeah," I sighed. "she's just still sad over that right now."

"Make her un-sad, Daddy." I laughed quietly at my son, knowing what he meant by that. "I'll try my hardest when I get home."

"You made a pwomise, remember?" He giggled a little, sniffling. I smiled and nodded. "I did. And I'm keeping that promise, trust me."

"Does Momma not like you anymore still?" I snickered, smirking to myself. "I think once I get home, she'll like me more. But no, she doesn't not like me as much as she did the day you two left."

"Okay." He said simply. I was about to say something else, but he cut me off before I got the chance to. "Are you gonna give her a kiss when you get home?" I laughed louder this time, and he giggled slightly. "Should I?"

"Yeah!" He exclaimed.

"What if she punches me?!" I whined. He laughed loudly and I grinned. "She wouldn't do dat!"

"I dunno, your momma can be feisty sometimes." I chuckled. "Maybe I'll kiss her on the cheek."

"No, on da lips!" I laughed again, shaking my head slightly with a huge grin on my face. "If she punches me, you're gonna be the one nursing my poor face."

"Okay!" I shook my head at my son and smiled. "So how much have you cleaned up so far?"

"...A wot, actually!" He gasped. "I didn't notice how much I cleaned already!"

"See?! I told you it'd work!" I laughed. Derek popped his head in and mouthed "Soundcheck" to me before disappearing again, making me sigh slightly. "Alright, are you gonna be nice to Momma from now on?"

"Yeah, I will." I smiled and nodded. "Alright, good. Just think, I'll be home in just 2 days!"

"I can't wait!!" He squealed, making me laugh again. "I gotta go do soundcheck, buddy. But I'll talk to you tomorrow, OK? And then on Thursday I'll see you!"

"OK!" We did our usual "I love you"'s and goodbyes to each other before I hung up, smiling slightly before walking out of the bunk area.

* * *

***Thursday, Scar's POV***

Travis screeched the loudest he probably has ever screeched when he heard knocking at the door. "HE'S HERE!!!" He screamed while running full-speed for the front door. I laughed as he flung it up and there stood Ronnie, grinning down at him as he attacked his legs in a hug. "DADDY!"

"TRAVIE!" Ronnie screeched back, kneeling down and squishing Trav in a hug. "I missed you so much!"

"I missed you too, Daddy!" I smiled and leaned against the wall in the entryway. Ronnie smiled back at me and released Travis from his death grip. "Well hello." He gave me that signature lop-sided grin of his, making my smile grow and a giggle slip out from my lips.

"Hi there." He walked over to me, his grin still there but his eyes holding a bit of nervousness. "Do I get a "Welcome Home" hug?" He asked, holding his arms out.

"I guess?" I chuckled. He pouted at me and I rolled my eyes before letting my arms go around his neck in a hug. His arms wound around my waist tightly, and he squeezed me slightly before letting me go seconds later. "Happy I'm back?"

"For one reason." I snorted, glancing down at Travis. He chuckled and scooped him up unexpectedly, making him squeal and laugh.

"So has he come by to pick up the rest of his stuff yet?" Ronnie asked as we walked into the kitchen, then into the living room. I shook my head, glancing at the clock on the wall. "He should be here in a couple hours, he said by 3." He nodded, sitting down with Trav on the couch.

"Sooo...didja miss me?" Ronnie asked me, grinning like a goofball. I laughed, shrugging. "Sure?"

"What do you mean, sure?!" He scoffed, making Trav giggle.

"I mean, not really." I laughed as he got the most offended look on his face, then started sniffling and pretending to cry. "Momma doesn't like me, Trav!" He wailed, burying his face in his son's hair.

"Yeah she does, Daddy!" He laughed, patting Ronnie's arm. "She woves you!" Ronnie's head shot up and he grinned at me as I rolled my eyes again, still smiling. "She does?"

"She said she'll always wove you, even if you're fighting or not!" I giggled slightly at my son, and Ronnie's grin turned to a genuine smile. "Well I'll always love her, too."

"Can you two kiss?" We both stared at Travis as he innocently asked this, smiling. "H-Huh?" I sputtered.

"If you wove each other, you should kiss each other!" Travis exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air from his spot on his dad's lap. "Here!" He jumped off his lap. "Stand up! Bof' of you!"

We both stood up, Ronnie chuckling a little as a blush slowly creeped onto my cheeks. "Now kiss!"

"Travis..." I laughed nervously.

"One kiss won't hurt anything." I looked at Ronnie and he shrugged cutely, smiling. "Right?" I nodded a little and smiled. "I guess not."

And in a matter of seconds, Ronnie's hands were on my waist, and his lips were pressed softly to mine. My eyes fluttered closed and I kissed back, my hands moving up to his shoulders. We pulled away and both laughed as Travis clapped. "See?! Dat wasn't hard!"

"Yeah! That wasn't hard, now was it?" Ronnie asked me, grinning like a fool. "Oh, shush." I giggled, pulling away from him. "Hey Travis, you want me to come play a game with you in your room or something?" Travis nodded excitedly at Ronnie's suggestion, making him chuckle. "You go and pick out the game, I'll be in there in a minute."

"Ok!" He ran off to his room, and I looked up at Ronnie curiously as he looked down at me, a certain longing in his eyes. "Any reason you sent him off?" I whispered.

"Yeah." He whispered back, leaning down and pressing his lips back to mine again.