Status: -probably won't be constantly updated until my other Josh story is finished.



It had been a few days since Josh had met Jaiden, and he couldn’t get her off his mind. He found himself wondering what kind of person she was, and if they would have any common interests at all. Though, he had only muttered a few words to her, he could already picture her laughing at his corny jokes as they sat in his living room just focusing on each other. But there was one question haunting his mind. Did she know about his band?

If she was a small fan, he could deal with it.

If she didn’t know a thing about it, he could deal with that also.

If she was an obsessed fan, he wouldn’t deal with it.

Josh had hoped that she was either one of the first two. He liked her, but he wasn’t going to admit that to anyone when he barely knew the blonde at all. When he had met her, he felt this vibe radiating off her body as if she was going to fix all of this problems… which he knew would be completely stupid of him to think that, but that feeling of everything is going to be okay, felt nice.

Josh licked over his lips as he directed towards his attention to Mike. “If you’re not ready to record the song, we understand.” He shrugged his shoulders as he pushed himself up from his chair; he was currently in the studio with his three best friends and band mates recording.

“Gon’ have to do it sometime.”

Ian spoke up this time. “But if you’re not ready-” Josh shook his head, dismissing what his friends were trying to say, he couldn’t blame them; they knew how emotional this song took a toll on him. Writing it wasn’t as hard as singing it. He knew that if he kept singing the song, somehow it would manage to help heal the wound that Amanda had created the day she left.

He didn’t want to feel lost anymore.

It was time he moved on.

Or at least try to.

The raven haired man felt as if he was about to face his biggest fear while standing in the spacious booth, fiddling with the hem of his button down shirt. Was he ready to have all of his fans realize how hard this break up has been on him? Would they judge him for being so weak, when he wrote songs about having strength?

Reality hit him when he placed the headphones over his ears about to hear the track that Ian, Mike and Matt had already recorded; the only thing missing were the lyrics. Josh didn’t understand why this song scared him so much; it was basically just words that were written down on paper, but the fact that the words were telling people what he has been feeling for the past few months scared him.

“Ready?” a voice spoke into the booth; it was their producer for the newest album. Giving him a small nod, Josh breathed deep trying to ignore the feeling stretching over his body. He was ready this time, he was going to record this song without stopping for breaks or claiming that he couldn’t do it anymore.

He began blinking his eyes to stop them from watering as the instrumental track softly started to play through the speakers over his ears. After a few seconds, and nodding to the beat, Josh began to sing the opening verse. “How've you been? Can I come in? Just came to get my things, and then I guess I'm leaving…


“Go home, Anthony.”


“I’m done!” the blonde stated as her hands were placed firmly on her hips. “I’m done fighting, I’m done fighting for us.”

“Baby, please, just give me one more chance.” Anthony mumbled as he snaked his arms around her shoulders and brought her to his chest. Placing his lips against her forehead, he whispered, “Jay, please.”

She didn’t want to give into him this time; she didn’t want to fall for all the bullshit and lies he used. She wanted to be strong and push him away, but he kept coming back with more reasons as to why she should be with him; he could give her the wedding she desired, the house with the white picket face, beautiful babies, and the choice to not work a single day of her life.

He wanted a housewife, and Jaiden was the farthest thing from being that.

Pushing against his chest with her hands, she shook her head. “I, I can’t.” Anthony growled as he glared at the petite girl in front of him; he couldn’t believe she was rejecting him –no one rejected Anthony James Rizzoli.

“You’ll never find someone like me, ever.” He spat at her before storming out of her apartment, in which he made sure he slammed the door with force letting her know he was extremely pissed at her. Jaiden placed her hands on the counter, letting her head drop down. She was tired of Anthony, she was tired of being lost and not knowing what to do. She wanted to travel the world, and experience the real hardships of love but knowing that no matter how hard it was, that he was never going to leave her.

She wanted someone genuine, someone who she could spill her feelings to. She just wanted someone to be there for her like she would for them.

All she wanted was to find her other half, was that too hard to ask?
♠ ♠ ♠
Song used was By Now by MT.
How I pictured Anthony.