Hold on Darlin'

I’m not the same person I used to be, then again after tons of things happening in one’s life, I suppose they could never be the same after.

Gidget sat up in her bed alongside her twin sister Janet who held out her hand for her to take. They both had just finished sealing envelopes and writing down their names and who the words that were engulfed in them were meant for.

Janet was just as scared if not more scared then Gidget was in what they were about to, because what they were about to do was something serious, something they had spoken against and tried to prevent others from doing for the past three years.

Both Janet and Gidget was daughters of Mike Shinoda, mostly known for his band Linkin Park and his side project Fort Minor. They were both born October 31st, 1990, at the stroke of one in the afternoon. Their parents had been teen parents, just like their best friend’s father
Chest Bennington.

Melinda Angel Gontier-Shinoda had died on the girls fifth birthday in a car crash that left Janet scared from her hip to her foot, and Gidget scared from her chin down to the left side of her shoulder. You really wouldn’t be able to tell the scars because the girls had become professional at covering them up.

Things had gotten pretty tough in the past six months for the girls. Mike their father had started talking about getting married to his new girlfriend Anna, who the girls liked sure, but she wasn’t their mother and could never take their mothers place. Anna never had that in mind, might I add to take Malinda’s place.

Their grandmother had passed away from lung cancer, from smoking four packs of cigarettes a day, which probably end up in second hand smoking for their grandfather who also ended up with lung cancer and was given only six weeks left to live. You’d think that the doctors would have caught on to it sooner after all his wife had just passed away.

Gidget and Janet were feeling more lost than ever, they felt as if they had been forgotten by their father, because he was either all about the band or all about Anna. He forgot some pretty major things that had gone on in the girl’s life. For instance Janet had won a scholarship to Yale University and was going to be awarded by the school, during a ceremony, both Janet and Gidget waited for their father, but he had been so caught up in taking a nap with Anna he had forgotten.

Then Gidget was the lead on the schools dance team as well as cheerleading squad, it was her last year as cheer captain that she had worked so hard to gain, and had taken her school as well as squad to nationals. She had made it so her team did a routine to a Linkin Park mash up that she worked on with her best friend Dylan with. He missed it because he was in the studio writing a song.

Both of those occasions had been long forgotten, but what had broken the hearts of both girls was the fact on their eighteenth birthday, their father had announced he and Anna would be getting married. It in some ways felt as if Mike had forgotten, that his childhood sweetheart had died on that very day, and he had forgotten the girl were no longer minors
anymore they were now eighteen, there was no Happy Birthday Gid and Jan.

It was raining pretty hard in Los Angeles for January, where both girls silently looked out their bedroom window, watching it get harder and harder by the second, it was as if the weather knew what the girls were about to do.

Twelve Vicodin, six Valiume, and five Zoloft for each of the girls, they nodded to one another and with one big gulp of water from their water bottles they swallowed them. After all the water was gone, Janet had grabbed the envelopes as put it on the bedside table next to the lamp they had, had since they were babies, she climbed back into bed, taking Gidget’s hand in hers.

“I love you Janet.” Gidget mumbled as she lay down on her pillows, hoping that her already tired eyes would close for the last time. Janet copied her sister’s actions and kept a hold of her sister’s hand, this was how it was going to end for the twins. They had done everything together, most of their lives, and they were going to end their lives the same way.

It wasn’t long before the girls had fallen asleep, things could have gone the way the girls wanted them to go if Dylan-Paul the twins best friend hadn’t been trying to reach them for the past two hours and had gotten so worried he’d called up his dad, Chester, and his Uncle Mike.

Things could have probably gone the way the twins had wanted them if Chester and Dylan-Paul hadn’t gotten to the house in five minutes flat and checked the house, to only find both girls lying in bed. It probably would have gone as planned if Chester hadn’t tried to wake the girls and noticed they were both barley breathing.

I’m pretty sure things would have ended if Dylan-Paul hadn’t found the pill bottles on the floor, and got his cellphone out calling 911, as Chester had his phone on speaker calling Mike, while he took both his hands franticly trying to find a pulse on either girls bodies.
Mike had rushed up the stairs yelling as he heard Chester yelling and Dylan-Paul’s voice over his telling the Emergency operator that his cousin’s had taken to many pills and he didn’t know what to do. Mike Shinoda, ran into the girls room seeing his Godson crying, and his best friend and the Godfather of his daughters trying to figure out what to do.

The first thing that came to mind was CPR, so Mike ran to Gidget’s body that had gone silent and started to perform CPR as Chester started to do the same for Janet. There was nothing coming from them. EMT’s finally showed up ten minutes later pushing both Mike and Chester out of the way. Everything had happened so fast as the machine showed a flat line, Gidget took one last breath.

“Gidget!” I sat up fast hitting my head on the ceiling of my bunk, immediately regretting lying down to take a nap, because my head was now thumping a rhythm of its own. I looked outside of my bunk and saw my Uncle Phoenix, who had his hand on my leg.

“You stopped breathing again.” Suddenly I realized he was right, and I reminded myself to breath, this had been happening now the past five months, I was forgetting how to breathe sometimes in my sleep. I suppose I was lucky again to have Uncle Phoenix walk by when he did.

I didn’t say thank you, I didn’t nod my head and give a grateful smile, no I simply just laid back down facing the inside of my bunk, so I could try and block out the whispers and not have to come face to face with my father’s looks of worry.

Things would have been so much better than they are now if only I had succeeded in what I wanted, but I failed and I was now paying the price, as well as my father. This summer on Warped Tour 2012, I could tell would be one of the worst summers in the existence of Gidget Shinoda .