Mistakes We Wouldn't Learn From

[Zack]

Four times. Derek had come to pull Alex away from me four times so far tonight. By now it was just obvious that he was trying to keep him away from me. Why, I had no idea, but it was starting to piss me off. The fact that Alex seemed to be getting more and more drunk wasn't helping matters. Each time that he had come back from hanging out with Derek, he was more drunk. I was starting to get uneasy with that.

“Where is everyone?” Grieco asked, coming to sit beside me. I had just left the living room to go into a den upstairs, where it was much quieter. Everyone at the party was beginning to get a little rowdy and I didn't really want to join in.

“Jack, Evan, and Rian are socializing somewhere. I'm not sure where Matt went. And wherever Derek is, that's where you'll find Alex,” I muttered.

Grieco raised an eyebrow, “Is Alex drinking a lot again?”

“He wasn't really drinking at all when he was with me before. But every time he comes back from hanging out with Derek, he's more and more drunk,” I sighed.

“That’s weird. Hang on; I'm going to go see where he is. I wanna see if Derek is drinking too.” Grieco got up to leave the room, and he was back within minutes. “They're in the kitchen playing a drinking game or something. No wonder he's getting drunk.”

“Fucking lovely,” I groaned. “Was Matt in there too?”

Grieco shook his head, “No, I have no idea where Matt is.”

I sighed, leaning back in the chair that I was sitting in. Hopefully Alex wouldn't get more drunk than last time. I wouldn't want to deal with him if he did. Grieco and I were quiet for a few more minutes until he spoke up.

“Seems like the two of us are always the loners at the parties,” he said, and I chuckled.

“Yeah, seems like it. That's what happens when you're younger than everyone else and I'm socially awkward,” I said. “We're the outcasts.”

Grieco laughed, “We're outcasts together though. At least it's not just one of us alone.”

“Yeah,” I agreed, smiling at him slightly.

A minute later, I could hear the distinct sound of Alex’s voice near the room, “Za-ack, where’d you go?”

“Your boyfriend is in here, Alex!” Grieco called out. I stood up to go over to the door, just as Alex walked in. I grimaced. Just by the way he walking toward me unsteadily, I could tell that he was way more drunk than an hour ago when I last saw him.

“Sorry I left you, Zack,” Alex said sweetly, his voice slurred. Huh. He wasn’t in a bad mood – that was a good thing. I didn’t want a repeat of the fight we had gotten into last time.

“You’re forgiven,” I murmured. He surprised me by kissing me hard, and I heard Grieco cough and stand up.

“Um, I’ll be leaving now. This is going to get awkward for me,” Grieco said. I chuckled as he left the room and shut the door behind him.

“I love you, Zacky,” Alex said, putting his arms around me and leaning in to kiss me again. He tasted like alcohol. Maybe he had been drinking more than I thought...

I blushed, kissing him back before pulling away for a moment, “Love you too, Alex.”

Alex just smiled before kissing me once again, this time more needy. He nudged me backwards so that I was pressed up against the wall. I was just glad that I finally had Alex to myself again. I was completely lost in the kiss, hands threaded through his hair to keep him close to me. His hands had made their way up my shirt, roaming up and down my chest. I could feel my dick hardening as he grinded up against me.

I was so lost in the kiss that I didn’t realize that Alex had moved his hands to my jeans, trying to unbutton them. I broke the kiss and Alex paused, looking into my face. His eyes were darker than usual because his pupils were dilated so much from drinking. His face was flushed pink and his lips were red, and I’m sure I probably looked the same.

Alex broke me out of my thoughts by tugging on the top of my jeans. He managed to get them unbuttoned but I reached my hand out before he could unzip them, “Whoa, slow down, Lex.”

“C’mon, earlier you said that you wouldn’t mind,” Alex protested.

“I don’t,” I said, sighing. I didn’t have a problem with it – I had been waiting for this chance for at least two weeks. Alex and I hadn’t been able to give do anything with each other in the two weeks we had been on tour, except for once when we were able to get behind a locked door. I just didn’t like how quickly he was moving.

“Then don’t stop me,” Alex said, choosing to slide his hands down into my boxers instead of pulling my jeans down. I swallowed heavily – Alex wasn’t usually so pushy about this. I pushed my thoughts to the back of my mind when I felt Alex’s hand wrap around my dick, moaning softly. He smirked at me and pressed his lips to mine again, kissing me deeply as he worked his hand around me slowly.

I pulled away after a while, frustrated. “Alex, quit teasing,” I whined, pushing my hips toward him slightly.

“I’ll do something better,” Alex said into my ear quietly, before kissing down my neck.

“What?” I asked uncertainly, raising an eyebrow at him.

“You want me to stop teasing? Then let me fuck you,” Alex said, pressing one last kiss to the base of my neck before looking up at me.

I froze, eyes widening. He knew I wasn’t ready for that yet. I had told him that flat-out. “W-what?”

“You heard me,” Alex said, pulling his hand out of my boxers.

“I-I... no way, Alex. That’s not a good idea. I told you I’m not ready for that,” I said, shaking my head. I would step away from him, but he had me up against the wall.

“It’s not that bad, Zack. I’ll make you feel good,” he said.

“N-no. I don’t want to,” I squeaked, heart pounding as Alex put his hands on my hips and leaned up to kiss me. I turned my head away, causing him to kiss my cheek instead.

Alex frowned, “Chill out, baby. You act like I’m trying to get you to kill someone. I just want us to have sex. And it looks like you do too.”

My face flushed as I realized I was still hard. My hormones were screaming at me to just do it, but my brain was telling me not to. Alex wouldn’t actually force me into anything, would he? This was just the alcohol talking...

I was absorbed in my thoughts and didn’t realize until too late that Alex had pinned my hands against the wall firmly. He kissed me roughly, and that’s when I realized that he wasn’t just messing around. I tried to pull my arms away from him but that only made him hold onto my wrists tighter. Okay, that hurts.

“Alex, quit it,” I whimpered as I managed to pull back from the kiss. Alex ignored me, somehow managing to hold both my wrists tightly in one hand, despite my struggling. What the hell? I had bigger muscles than him, yet he was still able to keep a grip on me. He used his free hand to unzip my jeans before trying to undo his own jeans and my eyes widened, “Alex, seriously!”

“Stop fighting,” Alex scowled, gripping my wrists tighter. I could feel them bruising. This was the disadvantage of him having bigger hands than me. He managed to undo his jeans successfully and I felt my heart racing. That’s when I realized that I was on the verge of a panic attack.

“Knock it off!” I said louder, my voice full of fear. Now he was just scaring me. The look in his eyes was clearly that of someone who was way too drunk. The sober Alex wouldn’t have even suggested having sex, let alone attempt to fucking rape me.

Alex started to push his own jeans down with one hand and I finally gathered up my courage to get away from him. I wasn’t going to let him take advantage of me like this. I was able to gather up enough strength to pull my arms away from Alex and immediately shoved him away from me, unbuttoning my jeans quickly. I heard him stumble backwards and it sounded like he fell. I ran toward the door, not even looking back as I left the room. I needed to get away from him.

“Zack! Get back here!” I heard Alex call out, but I ignored him. I ran past everyone downstairs and headed out to our van, which was parked on the street in front of the house. I shut the door as I got in, getting in the back seat. I didn’t want Alex to come find me. I could feel my pulse racing and couldn’t think straight. I wasn’t sure if I was more angry or upset. Either way, all the emotions and the situation had led to a panic attack. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I realized I was shaking and pulled my knees to my chest, wrapping my arms around them tightly as I tried to calm myself down. A few minutes later, the door of the van slid open, and I almost let out a scream of fear. Don’t be Alex.