Unconditional Affection

1993

A five year old Jack was lying on his front, head resting in his hands, propped up by his elbows.

Snow was falling at a gentle pace outside the living room window, gradually building up on the side walk. The twinkle of Christmas lights shone on the brightly decorated tree that stood in the corner of the room. The sensual smell of turkey and gravy floated into the room from the kitchen, where his mum had been and was currently slaving over Christmas dinner with help from her only daughter; May. But Jack wasn't interested in any of these things.

His curious eyes were glued to the television screen.

Jack was watching in fascination as the colourful pictures moved about animatedly, his eyes following the characters as they danced around the screen.

“Keep the change, you filthy animal!”

Childish laughter filled the air, and a grin plastered itself to Jack's face.

“You okay Jacky?” called May from the doorway as she leaned against the door frame, having mistaken Jack's laughter for cries of pain and came to investigate.

“May, this film is awesome!” he responded eyes not moving from the screen, grin still on his face.

It was then that Jack had fallen in love with Home Alone. Fallen in love with what would be his favourite film and obsession in the years to come.

1996

“Alex, Alex! It's snowing!” an excited 8 year old Jack called, nose pressed up against the glass of his classroom window.

A young lanky boy, about the same age as Jack, trotted over to the window and plopped himself next to his friend. Alex's nose pressed against the cool glass, his breath steaming against the glass, making the outside winter weather look even more mystical.

“In England it snows ever year at Christmas time,” Alex said to Jack, nose wrinkling up as the cold turned his nose a cherry red.

Jack's eyes widened and his small hand pressed firmly against the cool glass, his longing to go out and touch the nearly foreign weather was clear.

“I've only ever seen snow twice before. What does it feel like?” he whispered to the British boy, as if his loud voice could disrupt the snow.

“It's all cold and sludgy. When it melts it goes all watery and goes everywhere,” Alex whispered back, cringing at the description. It was obvious that Alex wasn't too fond of the snow that Jack was so captivated by.

“Boys! Come sit back down please,” their teacher called trying to pry their attention away from the snow and refocus it on the book they were reading in class.

Lunch time rolled around and the two best friends were standing in the school playground, one staring in awe at the white carpet of snow that covered the ground and the other boy stood shivering and watching as the other children made snow men and snow angels.

In a rush, Jack squatted down, scooped up a handful of the mushy snow and began to sculpt it into a ball. Blue mittens worked quickly in shaping the snow into a perfect ball as if the snow would melt any second. In a hurried motion, Jack threw the snowball at an unsuspecting Alex who'd been watching him.

Alex's lips turned into a pout as the wet substance covered his head which was fortunately protected by a woolly hat complete with a pompom on the top.

Sure enough this provoked a snowball fight.

Fifteen minutes later and Alex had fallen over after being pelted by snowball after snowball. The cold began to seep into his trousers but he made no move to get up.

His eyes welled with unshed tears but before they could fall, Alex's tiny body was encompassed by two skinny arms.

“Don't cry. We can say that you won. It's okay Lex.”

The two boys got up off the cold ground and walked hand in hand towards their class. A snippet of their conversation could be heard in the wind.

“Lex, you're coming to mine tonight aren't you?”

“Of course!”

“Good. We're going to watch Home Alone! I can't believe you've never seen it before, it's the best film ever!”

2004

It was Christmas eve and four boys were occupying a basement, their music playing sounding all through the house. One of them was a 16 year old Jack. His fingers moved surely across the strings of his beloved guitar. Next to him was Alex, who too had a guitar in his hands and a microphone before him.

Your love is the barrel of a gun
So tell me, am I on the right end?
I could be nothing but a memory to you
Don't let this memory fade away

Alex's voice drifted though the still basement, resonating before fading into an echo.

“That was fucking awesome!” said Jack breaking the silence that had followed after their song ended.

“Jack you say that about everything we play,” joked Rian from behind his drum kit.

“That's cause we're fucking awesome!” shouted Jack, his black and blonde hair flopping into his eyes as he pumped his fist into the air.

“And how is this band supposed to be awesome if you're in it?!” grinned Zack as he put down his bass and lifted a can of coke to his lips.

“Fuck you Merrick!”

“Calm down little children. Anyway I gotta go, mum wants me home early tonight,” Alex cut in whilst placing his guitar in its case.

For the next few minutes the boys worked in near silence packing away their things, with the only interruption being Jack as he tried to cartwheel across the floor to get to the door. Unfortunately Jack's lanky legs caught onto a wire and brought him crashing to the floor in an unceremonious heap.

“Nice going Jack!”

“Yeah real smooth.” teased Rian and Alex. Jack opened his mouth to reply but was cut off by Zack.

“GUYS! The door won't open! We can't get out!”

The three boys stopped messing around and gathered around Zack who was trying in vain to get the door open. His hand was wrapped tightly around the handle and he was pulling with all his might, the muscles in his arms bulging and the veins popping out. But still the door wouldn't budge.

“What the fuck, I need to go home! Rian, why is your door fucked up?” whined Alex who shoved Zack out the way to try and open it himself, but if Zack couldn't open it Alex certainly could not.

Kicking the door in one last pathetic hope of making the door open, Alex stomped away from the door and threw himself onto the couch, a frown set on his face.

“Cheer up Lex, it's not that bad,” said Jack sitting next to Alex on the sofa and throwing an arm around the boy, pulling him into his side in a half embrace.

Alex pouted in response but rested his head on Jack's shoulder.

“Can't we call your parents to try and get us out?” questioned Zack.

“No, there's no signal down here and they wouldn't be able to hear us if we shouted for them,” sighed Rian flopping down into the couch across from Alex and Jack.

Jack spied the TV and player in the corner of the room, got up off the sofa and trotted over to his guitar case and began to rummage through it. His seat was soon occupated by Zack.

“Soooo, it looks like we're spending Christmas Eve together this year,” noted Rian trying to break the awkwardness.

Jack stood up abruptly, one hand raised high in triumph holding a DVD box.

“It's not Christmas without Home Alone!” he yelled as he charged toward the TV and popped the DVD into the player.

2008

“Vinny, shut the fuck up and close the door,” scolded Jack, his eyes clued to the tour bus TV, finger going to push his glasses up that were sliding down his nose.

“Calm your balls bro,” Vinny laughed as he closed the door.

Jack's eyes stayed put on the screen as he grabbed the closest thing to him, which happened to be one of Rian's books, and threw it at Vinny. Yelping, Vinny dodged it and tackled Jack to the ground.

“NOOOOO. I'M TRYING TO WATCH HOME ALONE!” he screamed in frustration trying to prise the other man's arms from his waist. It seemed that nobody wanted to let him watch Home Alone in peace and quiet.

“Guys, shut the fuck up or get the fuck out. Alex is trying to sleep, he's not feeling too good. Anyway there's a Christmas party on Cobra's bus, who's going with?” Matt asked, grabbing Vinny with one hand and prising him away from Jack who he had held in his other hand.

Within half an hour, the All Time Low tour bus was empty with the exception of Alex in the bunk area and Jack in the back lounge.

“This is it! Don't get scared now!”

“You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?”

Jack's eyes were wide as ever and his mouth was open in an 'O' shape as he watched the screen in fascination, like he hadn't ever seen the film before. In his concentrating state, he didn't hear Alex's bunk curtain draw back or the sound of slow footsteps coming towards him.

“Jack,” whined Alex as he moseyed across the lounge and sat himself next to Jack, curling himself into the other boy's side.

“What's up Lex?” Jack questioned in a monotonous voice, eyes still fixated to the screen.

“Jaaacky, I can't sleep and my head hurts,” the other boy moaned back, burying his head into Jack's shoulder.

“S'okay,” came the reply, as Jack absently patted Alex's caramel locks without much thought.

“Jaaaaaaack,” groaned the Alex again desperately seeking the younger boy's attention.

Finally, Jack reluctantly dragged his eyes away from the screen and landed on the boy next to him. A tiny hint of annoyance in his expression faded as soon as he saw the look on the British boy's face.

“What do you need Lex?” he asked, looking at Alex who'd adopted his best pout and puppy dog eyes.

“Cuddle.”

Jack wordlessly rearranged them so Alex was lying across the sofa, head in his lap.

Soon enough Jack's attention was drawn back to the TV screen.

Alex tried to sleep, but even in his comfy position, sleep wouldn't come to him. He wondered if Jack could feel his heartbeat racing everytime Jack would run his fingers through his hair without thinking. Or everytime Jack ran a friendly finger across Alex's cheek in a comforting manner.

The pair had always been close and cuddly together. Daily bro hugs, bunk sharing, snuggling and even sometimes holding hands. Often people would confuse them for a couple but one of the pair would always make a joke out of it. But Alex began to wonder whether it was all a joke or not.

Unknown to him, the same thoughts were going through Jack's head aswell.

Minutes ticked on and Alex sat up straight, facing Jack.

“Jack?”

Jack slowly turned his head to face Alex again, disregarding all thoughts about Home Alone.

Their vision clashed; golden honey met liquid chocolate.

Leaning forward their lips met together gently, hesitantly.

Lips moved together in sync, slow and sensual. Their hands moved to hair and hips, bringing them even closer together, the space between them almost non existent.

The line between friendship was blurred to nothing but a memory.

Soft lips caressing and delicate. Their mouths moved against each other, teasing and playful but still retaining shyness and naivety that mirrored their new found relationship.

It was Jack who broke the kiss. Panting slightly he grinned at the confused look on Alex's face, before grabbing the remote and pausing Home Alone.

Then he leaned back in again to resume their kiss.

2011

“Lexy, where the fuck are we going?” whinged Jack bouncing slightly in his seat. He tried to peek over the top of the bright blue strip of fabric that obstructed his vision only to have his hands slapped away playfully.

Curiosity raced through him mingled with tiredness. Jack had insisted on forcing everyone on the bus to watch Home Alone because it was part of his “Christmas Tradition”. This had led to him going to sleep later than usual, only to be woken up by Alex an hour later.

“Relax Jack, you'll see soon.”

“Alex? Seriously, we have to get back soon, I need to wrap up Matt's present for tomorrow,” said Jack again, anxiousness seeping into his voice.

“Hush baby, it's nearly midnight. We'll make it back in time and you can wrap it before Matt wakes up.”

“Midnight! Lex, I don't know if it occurred to you or not but Christmas Day is tomorrow. We need to get back!” shrieked Jack in an incredibly girly manner.

“Calm down Barakat. It'll be fine.”

“Hmp”

The Christmas of '08 was the official start of when Jack and Alex began dating. Needless to say, it was going well. Of course the fans never knew but their band members and crew took it surprisingly well. Turns out that Rian, Zack, Matt and Vinny had been betting to see when they'd get together. Naturally, Vinny had won. Since then it had gone uphill. Each passing day together on tour only strengthened their relationship. Nearly inseparable, it was a wonder how none of the fans had figured out what was going on.

On the bus, there were a few changes. They now shared Alex's bunk and Jack's bunk was used to put all their crap in. Matt had put into action a no-having-sex-in-the-lounge rule; which they broke within 24 hours of the rule being set. Obviously, Matt never found out. Then there was the alex-and-jack-time rule that was basically that no one was allowed to interrupt their private time on the bus. Not that anyone would want to.

Their first date was halfway through the tour. They'd stopped in Texas for the night and at 2:30am whilst All Time Low band and crew were asleep in their bunks, Alex was up and about making the final finishing touches to his and Jack's first ever official date. Alex had immediately assumed the guy part of the relationship leaving Jack to grumble over being the girl. And being the “girl”, Jack was in a bad mood with Alex all because they had planned a special evening together after the show but it appeared to Jack that the other boy had forgotten, leaving Jack's hope and excitement in tatters and a sad frown on his face before he crawled into his own bunk so he could spend the night sulking alone.

Alex had woken a confused and slightly pissed off Jack up at 3am, kissed him softly before leading the taller boy outside still in his pyjamas. Swearing at how cold it was, Jack was lead up onto the roof of their tour bus to find blankets and pillows, a picnic basket and candles. The two had spent the rest of the evening star gazing and reminiscing about past times, eating tootsie rolls and nachos, drinking wine and cuddling together, with a woolly blanket to protect them from the wind.

Flyzik, however, was not impressed to find their bunks empty in the morning.

The rhythmic motions of the car soon halted, giving Jack the impression that they'd stopped. He heard the keys being pulled out of the ignition, a seat belt being unbuckled and then he felt familiar fingers reaching to unbuckle his seat belt.

“Is this the part where you rape me in the woods?” he questioned a hint of mock horror in his voice.

“Yes Jacky, I'm going to rape you in the woods and cut out your heart and eat it,” joked Alex back.

“Ah fuck, I knew you were trouble Gaskarth!”

Laughing in reply, Alex led Jack out of the car; blindfold still on.

Jack could feel the hard, cool concrete beneath his hi-tops. The bite of the cold night air stung his lungs as he breathed, but it was gone when he felt Alex's warm hand grip his own.

“This way baby.”

Taking a tentative step forward, Jack was convinced he was going to be okay when his feet found reassuring solid ground. Confidently he began to speed up his pace.

Then Jack managed to clumsily trip over his loose shoe lace, arms flailing about in a hopeless attempt to prevent his fall. Alex's hands grabbed his body gently but with enough support to stop the younger boy from face-palming the ground.

“Easy baby, I got you,” spoke Alex, stroking the other boy's back.

At his clumsy mistake, a cherry red blush emerged on Jack's cheeks which the blindfold obstructing his vision couldn't quite hide.

The two were off again, more carefully this time.

After a few minutes of walking his silence, Alex led the boy to a halt.

“We here?”

“Yup.”

“So....you gonna untie me now?”

“Hmmmm, just waiting for something.”

There was a rustle of clothing from the shorter boy as he drew back his sleeve to glance at his watch. Smiling slightly at the time, he guided Jack's shoulders to face the right direction. Standing behind Jack, Alex began to slowly untie the blindfold. Just before Jack's eyes had time to adjust to the light, the other boy whispered,

“Happy Christmas my love.”

Before Jack had a chance to comprehend further the fact that Alex sounded incredibly British when he used that endearment, his eyes went wide when he saw what was before him.

On instinct he could easily distinguish where they were. Jack's words got caught in his throat as he stared numbly at the Home Alone house.

Minutes passed as Alex nervously bit his lip, watching the other boy absorb the sight before him.

“You....me....here. This is the Kevin McCallister's house! Home Alone!” Jack suddenly burst out, grin plastered to his face, moisture building behind his eyes.

“You like it baby?” Whispered Alex, winding his arms around Jack's waist and resting his chin on the other's shoulder.

“This is amazing. This is so fucking cool! I love it!” stated Jack before spinning around in his boyfriend's arms and returning the hug.

“I'm glad you like it,” replied Alex relishing in the fact that this was undoubtedly the best Christmas present anyone could give Jack, and that it was him that had given it to Jack.

“It's perfect. Thank you. I love you Lex.”

“I love you too Jackary.”

Grinning at their pet names, their lips caught in a kiss, tongues battling, lips nipping and hands roaming. Love and friendship were too things so similar and yet so different, and Jack was so very glad that with Alex he got both.

Standing outside 71 Lincoln Avenue, Winnetka, Illinois, snow began to fall on the couple, the perfect ending to an evening and yet the perfect start to Christmas day.

Together they were perfect.