Status: finne. comments are love. (if you loved this story, go check out my new one: http://stories.mibba.com/read/441994/Growing-Up/ ) first chapter up soon.
You Picked Me
four/four
And all that brings me to now.
Remember my example for best friends, where your friend chooses his girlfriend over you? John chose his girlfriend over me.
It'd been a long time coming and I knew things between them would get serious eventually, but I didn't exactly realise that I would be cut out of the picture. For the last year, every time John and I saw each other all we would do was bitch each other out. Mostly because maybe I was jealous and maybe he knew that and he wanted me to suffer like I made him suffer when I dated Kennedy. But it hurt more now. We were never truly mad at each other then, just annoyed and full of teen angst. This was different.
It was no secret that Courtney and I didn’t like each other (we more like loathed each other). But in John's world, he couldn't have that. It didn't matter if I approved of his girlfriends, only that he got to approve of my boyfriends. He argued that we were doomed and our friendship was doomed to fall apart eventually, Courtney made him realise all this. It was always Courtney this, Courtney that, and "you just have to deal with it, Avey".
The thing was, I didn't want to deal with anything. I wanted my best friend back. I knew him longer, I knew him better. I could tell his precious Courtney things about him that she'd never know. And somehow, she had no remorse for a girl who just needed her best friend back. Or even just a best friend.
"John, I'm not going," I told him again as I made my way through my apartment picking up trash and shoving it angrily into the black bag.
"Why not? You haven't seen anyone in ages and this is probably the last time that you'll get to see anyone after you leave for college," he argued, following me around with the trash bag I had forced him to carry while he was here.
"Because you invited her! I didn't think it was that hard to figure out, John, I really didn't! You always invite us to the same things and you know damn well how that always ends."
"I'm trying to make it work, Avery! I KNOW you two hate each other, god, I know that. Everyone knows that! But I want my girlfriend and my best friend to get along, I can't take it anymore, because if you two can't get along, then one of you has to go. I'm so tired of being in the middle of it all, you two act like four year olds."
I turned around to face his much taller frame. But he knew I could take him if I needed to.
"And who would need to go, John?! Me?! Or Courtney? Who is it going to be, because I will never get along with her, never John, and you listen why," I yelled, poking him in the chest, "It's because you're so fucking oblivious to what everyone else sees in her. I don't know what you're blinded by because it certainly can't be love and it isn't lust. I'm not the only one that hates her but I'm the only one that's going to say anything about it. So, John.... Who goes?" I panted, trying to calm my erratic heart that was beating one hundred times faster than normal because I was so fed up with everything.
He sat on the edge of the couch and just stared up at me. The look on his face (the face that looks like you just killed the man's puppy, kitten, fish, and hit him in the balls all at once) made me want to fall to my knees and apologise but I couldn't waver. I was finally reaching my breaking point.
"You know I would pick you, Avey... She would go and you would stay..."
"Here's the thing, John... You already picked her when you decided that it didn’t matter if she hated your best friend. When it didn’t matter than you could blow off plans because she asked you too. When it didn’t matter what I thought about someone but it mattered everything what you thought about someone. That’s when you picked her, John, and not me. You already made a choice.”
I snatched the bag from his hands and headed into the other room to continue cleaning up. I was having a Christmas party soon and I needed to get this mess into a nice, respectable looking apartment for all my guests. I heard the door slam shut and I fell onto my bed, screaming into the mattress. Fighting took so much out of me and I felt like I could cry after every fight we had lately.
I only hoped that one day maybe all the fighting would pay off in our benefit and we'd go back to being best friends like we used to.
"Put on a smile and act like you want to be here," Garrett told me as he led me inside by my elbow, or more like dragged me inside.
I didn't want to agree to go to the O'Callaghan's get together party, but John was right, this was the last opportunity of mine to see all my friend's in one place before I left to California to finish up my schooling. And as much as it pained me, I called him back later that night and aplogised and told him I would come, gifts in tow.
Even though there wasn't snow on the ground (occasionally a morning frost and some fifty degrees weather) there was no mistaking that it was almost Christmas here in Arizona. Nearly every house in the neighbourhood had some kind of Christmas decoration. Even I had (grudgingly) put up and decorated a Christmas tree.
The house was filled with people and the smell of food was wafting through the air. John was quick to locate me and pull me into a hug. The grin on his face showed me that he was very happy to see me here. Which in turn made my own frowning face manage to pull into a smile.
"I'm so glad you came, Ave," he said, tightening his arms around me. "And I have a surprise for you later," he grinned, pulling away and holding me at arm's length.
"Come on, mom wants to see you, she won't shut up," he said, grabbing my hand and pulling me through the house. I quickly latched on to Garrett's hand and dragged him with me. I could almost hear the protests in his head.
"Avery! I'm so glad to see you. Come here and hug me, girly," I heard John's mom's voice in the kitchen.
I wrapped my arms around the thin woman and smiled. She was always like my second mother.
"Hey, Jenny. It's so nice to see you again, too," I smiled, pulling away from her embrace.
"Do you need any help with the cooking, Mrs. O?" I asked her, glad for any busy work that could keep my at bay with running into Courtney.
"Sure, I could use some help, darling."
We immediately got busy while John and Garrett ran off somewhere to mingle with others. The more I was in the kitchen, the hungrier I became, and by the time Jenny finally announced that dinner was done, I was ready to eat everything she handed me to put on the table.
The O'Callaghan's had a special table for get togethers that seemed to go on for miles in their dining room. And it was always filled with delicious food when it was in use. John pulled me over to sit next to him and before I could even utter a word, my protector, Garrett, followed behind and sat next to me. Pat, Kenny, and Jared all piled in next to Garrett and John. I was immediately confused as soon as Kenny sat down next to John instead of Courtney. My gaze wondered around the table and I realised that Courtney was no-where to be found. I couldn't help the smile that appeared on my face, but John took it for something completely different.
"See, I knew you'd be happy to come and see everyone, you can't lie to your bestie," he teased me, pinching me in the side making me squeal and jump a bit.
I slapped his arm lightly and mumbled "jerk" so only he could hear it and he just laughed at me.
"Okay, who'd like to say grace," Mr. O asked the table.
"I'll say it, dad," John offered.
He held out his hands and the rest of the table followed suit until everyone was holding hands.
"This year, I have a lot to pray for and be thankful for more than any other year, I think. I'd like to thank You for giving our band the opportunity to tour and make music and do what we do best. And I wanna pray that we're safe when we go on tour next year. I'd like to say that I'm extremely thankful for all the friends and family that I have been extremely blessed with and I don't think I deserve half of them but I'm glad I have them. And I'd like to pray for Avery... She's the best friend any one could ask for and I don't see why she puts up with me half the time, but I practically begged her to come here today and I'm so glad she did. If there's anything that I deserve less in this world, it's her. I don't deserve everything she does for me and how good of a friend she is but I'd like to thank whatever reason that I have her with me, because I couldn't do without her. Amen."
We all detached hands and I quickly wiped away any tears that were forming in my eyes. John looked over at me and smiled and I couldn't help but to return it. This was why I could never stay mad at him.
Everyone quickly dug into their food and started conversations around the table. Occasionally, I would make a comment on something someone said or join in on a story, but for the most part, I was stuffing myself with, most likely, the last home cooked meal of Mrs. O's I'd have in a long time.
Everyone helped clean up after and put desserts on the table outside so we could all gather around a small fire.
"Okay, you know how I said that I had a surprise for you?" John asked me.
"Yeahhhh."
"Hold on a bit. You're about to get it," he grinned before running off.
Within minutes The Maine was piled around the fire with their instruments and everyone quieted down to a murmur so they could hear them.
"Okay, so we've been working on a new album and we're not even close to done yet, but this song, it couldn't wait to be shown to someone," John said, "And this is my Christmas gift for Ave, because I've been a dickhead for a while now and a real shitty best friend and this is for you, Ave. This is a new song, just for you," he smiled at me.
"1, 2, 3, 4"
A soft melody started drifting through the air and everyone was immediately entranced by the boys.
"I am weakness, I am greatness,
I'm anything, you want me to be
I am wasted and I'll make this
The anthem for a dying breed
See the light in the night when you're fading away
Trust in us, we're all that you've got these days
Take a look inside my heart
Oh, let's get carried away
Don't you dare, don't you ever give up,
Don't you ever give up, oh whoa
Don't you dare, don't you ever give up,
Don't you ever give up on us, my dear
I am selfless, I am selfish,
I'm anything, that I want to be
This is violent, this is honest,
It's the anthem for a dying breed"
Tears pricked at my eyes as he kept singing. He smiled over at me and I gave my watery smile back. I set down my drink to wipe away the cascading tears. He made his way closer to me and pulled me up from my chair and pulled me back over to where the guys were standing.
"Don't give up on us. No, don't give up on us. Don't give up on us. No, don't give up on us. Don't you dare, don't you ever give up, don't you ever give up, oh whoa. Don't you dare, don't you ever give up, don't you ever give up on us, my dear," he finished softly.
Clapping surrounded us as John pulled me into him and held me tight. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face into the space between his neck and shoulder, my tears hitting his shirt.
"I'm so sorry for being a dick, Ave... I chose you. Courtney's gone, Avery. I broke up with the day after you yelled at me in your apartment because I realised," he pulled away and cleared his throat. It was then that I realised he was near tears, as well. "I realised that I'm such a dick for saying that one of you had to go, when clearly, she was the only one that was going anywhere. Because you, you're staying right here."
He pulled me back into his embrace and lifted me off my feet, swinging me around in circles. An array of cat calls came from our family and friends and I felt my cheeks start to get warm from their comments.
"Kiss her already, son, damn!" John's dad called out.
My mouth dropped open and I looked at his dad, who merely winked at us and walked away to sit next to Jenny.
John looked at me and gave a small smile.
"Merry Christmas, Avery," he whispered and leaned in, brushing his lips against mine.
I smiled against his lips and pecked his lips a few times before pulling away. After that, even more comments were made and I faintly heard a few "I always knew they'd end up together"‘s coming from our friends. He rubbed the back of his neck and pulled at his hair a bit as he listened to everyone’s comments. There was a slight tint of pink making it’s way onto his cheeks as he smiled sheepishly at me.
“Do you approve of this boyfriend?” I teased him.
“Oh, I don’t know. I don’t think he’s good enough for you, but he’ll have to do, because you’re head over heels for him, and he’s head over heels for you. He may never deserve you, but… I approve,” he shrugged, smiling like mad.
“Good, because I don’t think I’ll be letting this one go,” I laughed, kissing him softly on the lips again.
“That’s completely fine with me. You can stay with him forever… and ever and ever,” he grinned.
“Merry Christmas, John.”
Remember my example for best friends, where your friend chooses his girlfriend over you? John chose his girlfriend over me.
It'd been a long time coming and I knew things between them would get serious eventually, but I didn't exactly realise that I would be cut out of the picture. For the last year, every time John and I saw each other all we would do was bitch each other out. Mostly because maybe I was jealous and maybe he knew that and he wanted me to suffer like I made him suffer when I dated Kennedy. But it hurt more now. We were never truly mad at each other then, just annoyed and full of teen angst. This was different.
It was no secret that Courtney and I didn’t like each other (we more like loathed each other). But in John's world, he couldn't have that. It didn't matter if I approved of his girlfriends, only that he got to approve of my boyfriends. He argued that we were doomed and our friendship was doomed to fall apart eventually, Courtney made him realise all this. It was always Courtney this, Courtney that, and "you just have to deal with it, Avey".
The thing was, I didn't want to deal with anything. I wanted my best friend back. I knew him longer, I knew him better. I could tell his precious Courtney things about him that she'd never know. And somehow, she had no remorse for a girl who just needed her best friend back. Or even just a best friend.
"John, I'm not going," I told him again as I made my way through my apartment picking up trash and shoving it angrily into the black bag.
"Why not? You haven't seen anyone in ages and this is probably the last time that you'll get to see anyone after you leave for college," he argued, following me around with the trash bag I had forced him to carry while he was here.
"Because you invited her! I didn't think it was that hard to figure out, John, I really didn't! You always invite us to the same things and you know damn well how that always ends."
"I'm trying to make it work, Avery! I KNOW you two hate each other, god, I know that. Everyone knows that! But I want my girlfriend and my best friend to get along, I can't take it anymore, because if you two can't get along, then one of you has to go. I'm so tired of being in the middle of it all, you two act like four year olds."
I turned around to face his much taller frame. But he knew I could take him if I needed to.
"And who would need to go, John?! Me?! Or Courtney? Who is it going to be, because I will never get along with her, never John, and you listen why," I yelled, poking him in the chest, "It's because you're so fucking oblivious to what everyone else sees in her. I don't know what you're blinded by because it certainly can't be love and it isn't lust. I'm not the only one that hates her but I'm the only one that's going to say anything about it. So, John.... Who goes?" I panted, trying to calm my erratic heart that was beating one hundred times faster than normal because I was so fed up with everything.
He sat on the edge of the couch and just stared up at me. The look on his face (the face that looks like you just killed the man's puppy, kitten, fish, and hit him in the balls all at once) made me want to fall to my knees and apologise but I couldn't waver. I was finally reaching my breaking point.
"You know I would pick you, Avey... She would go and you would stay..."
"Here's the thing, John... You already picked her when you decided that it didn’t matter if she hated your best friend. When it didn’t matter than you could blow off plans because she asked you too. When it didn’t matter what I thought about someone but it mattered everything what you thought about someone. That’s when you picked her, John, and not me. You already made a choice.”
I snatched the bag from his hands and headed into the other room to continue cleaning up. I was having a Christmas party soon and I needed to get this mess into a nice, respectable looking apartment for all my guests. I heard the door slam shut and I fell onto my bed, screaming into the mattress. Fighting took so much out of me and I felt like I could cry after every fight we had lately.
I only hoped that one day maybe all the fighting would pay off in our benefit and we'd go back to being best friends like we used to.
"Put on a smile and act like you want to be here," Garrett told me as he led me inside by my elbow, or more like dragged me inside.
I didn't want to agree to go to the O'Callaghan's get together party, but John was right, this was the last opportunity of mine to see all my friend's in one place before I left to California to finish up my schooling. And as much as it pained me, I called him back later that night and aplogised and told him I would come, gifts in tow.
Even though there wasn't snow on the ground (occasionally a morning frost and some fifty degrees weather) there was no mistaking that it was almost Christmas here in Arizona. Nearly every house in the neighbourhood had some kind of Christmas decoration. Even I had (grudgingly) put up and decorated a Christmas tree.
The house was filled with people and the smell of food was wafting through the air. John was quick to locate me and pull me into a hug. The grin on his face showed me that he was very happy to see me here. Which in turn made my own frowning face manage to pull into a smile.
"I'm so glad you came, Ave," he said, tightening his arms around me. "And I have a surprise for you later," he grinned, pulling away and holding me at arm's length.
"Come on, mom wants to see you, she won't shut up," he said, grabbing my hand and pulling me through the house. I quickly latched on to Garrett's hand and dragged him with me. I could almost hear the protests in his head.
"Avery! I'm so glad to see you. Come here and hug me, girly," I heard John's mom's voice in the kitchen.
I wrapped my arms around the thin woman and smiled. She was always like my second mother.
"Hey, Jenny. It's so nice to see you again, too," I smiled, pulling away from her embrace.
"Do you need any help with the cooking, Mrs. O?" I asked her, glad for any busy work that could keep my at bay with running into Courtney.
"Sure, I could use some help, darling."
We immediately got busy while John and Garrett ran off somewhere to mingle with others. The more I was in the kitchen, the hungrier I became, and by the time Jenny finally announced that dinner was done, I was ready to eat everything she handed me to put on the table.
The O'Callaghan's had a special table for get togethers that seemed to go on for miles in their dining room. And it was always filled with delicious food when it was in use. John pulled me over to sit next to him and before I could even utter a word, my protector, Garrett, followed behind and sat next to me. Pat, Kenny, and Jared all piled in next to Garrett and John. I was immediately confused as soon as Kenny sat down next to John instead of Courtney. My gaze wondered around the table and I realised that Courtney was no-where to be found. I couldn't help the smile that appeared on my face, but John took it for something completely different.
"See, I knew you'd be happy to come and see everyone, you can't lie to your bestie," he teased me, pinching me in the side making me squeal and jump a bit.
I slapped his arm lightly and mumbled "jerk" so only he could hear it and he just laughed at me.
"Okay, who'd like to say grace," Mr. O asked the table.
"I'll say it, dad," John offered.
He held out his hands and the rest of the table followed suit until everyone was holding hands.
"This year, I have a lot to pray for and be thankful for more than any other year, I think. I'd like to thank You for giving our band the opportunity to tour and make music and do what we do best. And I wanna pray that we're safe when we go on tour next year. I'd like to say that I'm extremely thankful for all the friends and family that I have been extremely blessed with and I don't think I deserve half of them but I'm glad I have them. And I'd like to pray for Avery... She's the best friend any one could ask for and I don't see why she puts up with me half the time, but I practically begged her to come here today and I'm so glad she did. If there's anything that I deserve less in this world, it's her. I don't deserve everything she does for me and how good of a friend she is but I'd like to thank whatever reason that I have her with me, because I couldn't do without her. Amen."
We all detached hands and I quickly wiped away any tears that were forming in my eyes. John looked over at me and smiled and I couldn't help but to return it. This was why I could never stay mad at him.
Everyone quickly dug into their food and started conversations around the table. Occasionally, I would make a comment on something someone said or join in on a story, but for the most part, I was stuffing myself with, most likely, the last home cooked meal of Mrs. O's I'd have in a long time.
Everyone helped clean up after and put desserts on the table outside so we could all gather around a small fire.
"Okay, you know how I said that I had a surprise for you?" John asked me.
"Yeahhhh."
"Hold on a bit. You're about to get it," he grinned before running off.
Within minutes The Maine was piled around the fire with their instruments and everyone quieted down to a murmur so they could hear them.
"Okay, so we've been working on a new album and we're not even close to done yet, but this song, it couldn't wait to be shown to someone," John said, "And this is my Christmas gift for Ave, because I've been a dickhead for a while now and a real shitty best friend and this is for you, Ave. This is a new song, just for you," he smiled at me.
"1, 2, 3, 4"
A soft melody started drifting through the air and everyone was immediately entranced by the boys.
"I am weakness, I am greatness,
I'm anything, you want me to be
I am wasted and I'll make this
The anthem for a dying breed
See the light in the night when you're fading away
Trust in us, we're all that you've got these days
Take a look inside my heart
Oh, let's get carried away
Don't you dare, don't you ever give up,
Don't you ever give up, oh whoa
Don't you dare, don't you ever give up,
Don't you ever give up on us, my dear
I am selfless, I am selfish,
I'm anything, that I want to be
This is violent, this is honest,
It's the anthem for a dying breed"
Tears pricked at my eyes as he kept singing. He smiled over at me and I gave my watery smile back. I set down my drink to wipe away the cascading tears. He made his way closer to me and pulled me up from my chair and pulled me back over to where the guys were standing.
"Don't give up on us. No, don't give up on us. Don't give up on us. No, don't give up on us. Don't you dare, don't you ever give up, don't you ever give up, oh whoa. Don't you dare, don't you ever give up, don't you ever give up on us, my dear," he finished softly.
Clapping surrounded us as John pulled me into him and held me tight. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face into the space between his neck and shoulder, my tears hitting his shirt.
"I'm so sorry for being a dick, Ave... I chose you. Courtney's gone, Avery. I broke up with the day after you yelled at me in your apartment because I realised," he pulled away and cleared his throat. It was then that I realised he was near tears, as well. "I realised that I'm such a dick for saying that one of you had to go, when clearly, she was the only one that was going anywhere. Because you, you're staying right here."
He pulled me back into his embrace and lifted me off my feet, swinging me around in circles. An array of cat calls came from our family and friends and I felt my cheeks start to get warm from their comments.
"Kiss her already, son, damn!" John's dad called out.
My mouth dropped open and I looked at his dad, who merely winked at us and walked away to sit next to Jenny.
John looked at me and gave a small smile.
"Merry Christmas, Avery," he whispered and leaned in, brushing his lips against mine.
I smiled against his lips and pecked his lips a few times before pulling away. After that, even more comments were made and I faintly heard a few "I always knew they'd end up together"‘s coming from our friends. He rubbed the back of his neck and pulled at his hair a bit as he listened to everyone’s comments. There was a slight tint of pink making it’s way onto his cheeks as he smiled sheepishly at me.
“Do you approve of this boyfriend?” I teased him.
“Oh, I don’t know. I don’t think he’s good enough for you, but he’ll have to do, because you’re head over heels for him, and he’s head over heels for you. He may never deserve you, but… I approve,” he shrugged, smiling like mad.
“Good, because I don’t think I’ll be letting this one go,” I laughed, kissing him softly on the lips again.
“That’s completely fine with me. You can stay with him forever… and ever and ever,” he grinned.
“Merry Christmas, John.”