Attack of the M-Pregzilla
Chocolate and Rainbow Sprinkles
“Mikey, will you get me some chocolate?”
Michael looked up at Riley tiredly, having just collapsed on the bed after a hard day of working overtime and making up for being late by waiting on Riley’s hand and foot.
“Baby, we don’t have any chocolate.”
“Well, couldn’t you go get some for me?” Riley smiled lovingly, playing with Michael’s hair.
“Riley, I’m tired…”
Riley pouted. “You were late and you made me worry for hours and now you’re just going to think of yourself? You know that kind of stress isn’t good for the baby! You should have at least called.”
“Honey, I was working… Making money for us, you know?”
Riley nodded, smiling again. “So take that money down to the store and buy your Princess some chocolate!”
Michael groaned and heaved himself off of the bed. “Alright… I’m going.”
“Thank you, Mikey-love!” Riley called after him.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~
Half an hour later Michael was pulling back into their driveway with a bag full of chocolate. He walked up to the bedroom and Riley glared at him.
“WHY were you gone for so long? The store is only a few minutes away.”
“Well they didn’t have the kind you like so I had to wait for them to find it in the back and then I had to wait behind an extremely troublesome woman who decided she wanted to buy out the whole fucking store…”
“Don’t curse! Do you want our baby’s first word to be… f-u-c-k?”
Michael sighed and shook his head. “No, darling, of course I don’t want that.”
Riley just ignored him. “And don’t you make excuses! You were out with some whore, weren’t you? I knew you were cheating on me! What’s her name? How long? Is it because I’m fat? You’re the one who made me this way! I didn’t impregnate myself!”
“Sweetheart, I PROMISE, I had to wait while they found your chocolate and the woman in front of me at the register was having difficulties and apparently has to feed a family of ten with all the food she bought. There’s no whore, and I still think you’re beautiful.”
“Well why would you make me wait all that time all by myself? Why don’t you ever call?”
“I’m sorry, Riley, I didn’t bring my cell phone.”
“You didn’t bring your cell phone?! What if something happened to you? You wouldn’t get any help and you would end up dying and I would be left all alone. Is that what you want, Michael? You just want me to be all alone?”
“No, Princess, of course I don’t want you to be alone… I just didn’t think, I guess. I brought you chocolate…” Michael held the bag out, hoping Riley would just quiet down and eat so he could finally sleep. Riley just smiled sweetly.
“Mmm you know what sounds better than chocolate?”
“What?” Oh god, please don’t say sex. Michael was nearly too exhausted to stand, there was no way he could have enough energy to satisfy his lover. And if Riley went unsatisfied he’d only be angrier.
“Strawberry ice cream… With chocolate sauce and rainbow sprinkles!” Michael sighed.
“But you asked for-”
“Mikeeeey I’m waitinnnng.” Michael nodded and turned, making his way down the stairs.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~
“What is this?”
“Strawberry ice cream with chocolate sauce and sprinkles, like you asked for.”
“These sprinkles are pink.”
“Riley, you love pink.”
“But I WANTED rainbow sprinkles. I ASKED for rainbow sprinkles. Why don’t you ever listen to me?!”
“We don’t have rainbow sprinkles, baby.” Michael was almost about to fall asleep standing up.
“Well why don’t you go get me some?” Riley suggested, smiling innocently.
“Honey, it’s late, the store’s closed already.”
“Well you were just there. Was it closed then? I bet it was. And you just took that opportunity to go fuck your whore, didn’t you?” He had his hands on the sides of his stomach as though covering the baby’s ears.
“No, sweetheart, it just closed a few minutes ago. See? It’s 11:06. It hasn’t been open for six minutes.”
Riley glared at him. “Well isn’t that convenient?” he snapped.
Michael closed his eyes. “Riley, can we please not do this tonight? I’m so tired…”
“Oh, of course, baby… Come lay down, I’ll feed you some ice cream.” Riley smiled and Michael just collapsed onto the bed, praying that he wouldn’t have to get up again this time.
He felt a spoon at his lips and opened his mouth. He didn’t particularly like strawberry ice cream, but he didn’t want Riley’s mood to swing back from this loving one.
“Thank you, Princess…”
“You’re welcome, Tiger.” Riley pulled Michael’s head into his own lap and stroked his hair in between bites of ice cream. “Goodnight, love.”
“’Night, baby,” Michael mumbled, finally able to drift off to sleep.
Michael looked up at Riley tiredly, having just collapsed on the bed after a hard day of working overtime and making up for being late by waiting on Riley’s hand and foot.
“Baby, we don’t have any chocolate.”
“Well, couldn’t you go get some for me?” Riley smiled lovingly, playing with Michael’s hair.
“Riley, I’m tired…”
Riley pouted. “You were late and you made me worry for hours and now you’re just going to think of yourself? You know that kind of stress isn’t good for the baby! You should have at least called.”
“Honey, I was working… Making money for us, you know?”
Riley nodded, smiling again. “So take that money down to the store and buy your Princess some chocolate!”
Michael groaned and heaved himself off of the bed. “Alright… I’m going.”
“Thank you, Mikey-love!” Riley called after him.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~
Half an hour later Michael was pulling back into their driveway with a bag full of chocolate. He walked up to the bedroom and Riley glared at him.
“WHY were you gone for so long? The store is only a few minutes away.”
“Well they didn’t have the kind you like so I had to wait for them to find it in the back and then I had to wait behind an extremely troublesome woman who decided she wanted to buy out the whole fucking store…”
“Don’t curse! Do you want our baby’s first word to be… f-u-c-k?”
Michael sighed and shook his head. “No, darling, of course I don’t want that.”
Riley just ignored him. “And don’t you make excuses! You were out with some whore, weren’t you? I knew you were cheating on me! What’s her name? How long? Is it because I’m fat? You’re the one who made me this way! I didn’t impregnate myself!”
“Sweetheart, I PROMISE, I had to wait while they found your chocolate and the woman in front of me at the register was having difficulties and apparently has to feed a family of ten with all the food she bought. There’s no whore, and I still think you’re beautiful.”
“Well why would you make me wait all that time all by myself? Why don’t you ever call?”
“I’m sorry, Riley, I didn’t bring my cell phone.”
“You didn’t bring your cell phone?! What if something happened to you? You wouldn’t get any help and you would end up dying and I would be left all alone. Is that what you want, Michael? You just want me to be all alone?”
“No, Princess, of course I don’t want you to be alone… I just didn’t think, I guess. I brought you chocolate…” Michael held the bag out, hoping Riley would just quiet down and eat so he could finally sleep. Riley just smiled sweetly.
“Mmm you know what sounds better than chocolate?”
“What?” Oh god, please don’t say sex. Michael was nearly too exhausted to stand, there was no way he could have enough energy to satisfy his lover. And if Riley went unsatisfied he’d only be angrier.
“Strawberry ice cream… With chocolate sauce and rainbow sprinkles!” Michael sighed.
“But you asked for-”
“Mikeeeey I’m waitinnnng.” Michael nodded and turned, making his way down the stairs.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~
“What is this?”
“Strawberry ice cream with chocolate sauce and sprinkles, like you asked for.”
“These sprinkles are pink.”
“Riley, you love pink.”
“But I WANTED rainbow sprinkles. I ASKED for rainbow sprinkles. Why don’t you ever listen to me?!”
“We don’t have rainbow sprinkles, baby.” Michael was almost about to fall asleep standing up.
“Well why don’t you go get me some?” Riley suggested, smiling innocently.
“Honey, it’s late, the store’s closed already.”
“Well you were just there. Was it closed then? I bet it was. And you just took that opportunity to go fuck your whore, didn’t you?” He had his hands on the sides of his stomach as though covering the baby’s ears.
“No, sweetheart, it just closed a few minutes ago. See? It’s 11:06. It hasn’t been open for six minutes.”
Riley glared at him. “Well isn’t that convenient?” he snapped.
Michael closed his eyes. “Riley, can we please not do this tonight? I’m so tired…”
“Oh, of course, baby… Come lay down, I’ll feed you some ice cream.” Riley smiled and Michael just collapsed onto the bed, praying that he wouldn’t have to get up again this time.
He felt a spoon at his lips and opened his mouth. He didn’t particularly like strawberry ice cream, but he didn’t want Riley’s mood to swing back from this loving one.
“Thank you, Princess…”
“You’re welcome, Tiger.” Riley pulled Michael’s head into his own lap and stroked his hair in between bites of ice cream. “Goodnight, love.”
“’Night, baby,” Michael mumbled, finally able to drift off to sleep.