INFINITE LOVE

I lay down on the warm sand, hoping to feel the sun soak into my skin; to feel some sort of relief because as much as I hate it here, the sun is starting to become a fan of mine. I haven't nor plan on talking to anyone, I hated being by myself all the time but the last few painful weeks has been pushing me away from everybody. I didn't want to remember these last few weeks, damn it hurts to remember the past; I'd go back in time any day. I was surprised by how i've been affected over whats been going on lately, I thought I was stronger than this.

After Rosen had attacked Conner for me.. things had only gotten worse, which I thought wouldn't happen. Conner was hospitalized for a few days; the doctors found that he hadn't been taking the strong medication he had been put on a few weeks ago, which explained his awful behavior. I couldn't help but feel bad, he cried at me to forgive him but being as stubborn as I usually am I wouldn't dare.

The tension in the house had started to build up, fights with my dad have got worse and I have no escape besides the drugs I've been taking. Which right now I am in desperate need for a cigarette, I needed to feel the burning hot smoke fill up my lungs; washing away my problems. But of course, that was too hard to find around here. Maybe if Rosen were around..

I noticed that my recent behavior every night was becoming strange to me, I always came up to the shore and just walked. I would say that I hoped to be alone, but I couldn't help but feel the urge in me to just wait... wait for anyone to come up to me, to start any sort of conversation. Sometimes I found myself to be praying for Rosen to walk outside, to see my face. To see how much pain i'm in and just kiss me. I wanted to be in his arms, we spent the week together after the Conner dilema; It was the best week I have spent here.

I looked over at his house, I could see him; he was on his porch. Did he see me? Did he see me before? God damn, doesn't he like me?...
I shrugged and turned over, it was hopeless.. fucking Florida is hopeless; I shouldn't be interested in boys here. I closed my eyes and minutes past by tilI I felt a tap on the shoulder..

"You look like you could use a smoke" I turned around to see Rosen smiling, he had a pack of cigarettes in his hand. My heart skipped a beat, and I felt dizzy.
"Th-anks" Damn, I sound like a 3 year old little girl. Why do I feel this way?
He sat down next to me, looking hot as hell. I panicked, I couldn't find the right words to say.

We didn't say much, just sat there and smoked. I felt instant relief and I couldn't help but admit that this has been the best I have felt in a while. I watched him, he was quite sexy while smoking. He looked over at me and smiled, he leaned closer to me. I hoped he would kiss me and I leaned in closer, the smoke started to rise in-between us from the cigarettes in our hands. Our lips were barely touching..

"You there! Drop the drugs! You're under arrest for the underage use of drugs!" I looked over to see a rather large cop pointing at us. Fuck! I forgot that a police officer lived a few blocks down, luckily he doesn't know me or my dads family. But my heart beat quickened, as if I was in enough trouble already. And Rosen just got here..

"Shit, Baya RUN!" Rosen took off running, and I did the same. But i could feel the cops feet just behind my own. I was dead for sure.