Selfish
from
December 8th, 2010
Krista trudged down the school hallways, running her fingers through her silky brown hair. She stuffed her hands inside the large pocket of her sweater as she made her way toward her locker. Seeing her reflection in the miniature mirror she had inside her locker, a weary sigh escaped her lips. The confidence she wore so well everyday had dissolved.
All she could think about was Mason; she kept reliving the same night over and over again. The loneliness and hurt she felt the first time only multiplied. She wondered if his bruises and cuts had healed yet and how he even got them in the first place.
“Krista?”
At the sound of her name, she turned around and met the soft chocolate spheres of Chris. She couldn't help but to feel her heart drop; she secretly hoped the deep voice behind her had been Mason's instead. "Oh hey, Chris." She said uninterestingly, turning back to her locker.
"I heard what happened between you and Mason. I'm really sorry..." He said apologetically, leaning against the lockers beside Krista's.
At the sound of his words, something snapped inside Krista. She slammed her locker and turned to meet Chris' gaze with her cold, icy stare. "Whatever the fuck you heard, I don't need anyone's sympathy. I don't even know how you people find these things out. It's fucking sick."
"Krista, hey I'm really sorry if I offended you in any way, but that wasn't my intention. I just wanted to see if you were okay because I was worried about you. You don't have to be such a jerk about it."
Realizing what she did, Krista softened her gaze immediately and brushed her hair back behind her ear. "I'm so sorry, Chris. I shouldn't have blown up on you like that. I'm just really stressed out right now, that's all." She said, rubbing the temples of her head with her forefingers.
"I guess that means you won't be attending Blake's party tonight." Chris stated rather regretfully.
"I, well, uhm, no, I'll be there." She stumbled through her words. "I need to stop being a stick in the mud, right?" She smiled half-heartedly.
"Great, I can't wait to see you there. Can I pick you up, or am I pushing my luck?" He smiled goofily, revealing the dimples embedded in his cheeks.
"Sure, you can pick me up." Krista said, nodding her head. "I'll see tonight, then."
Krista brushed down the soft fabric of her black ruffle tank and the back of her faded, heavily distressed skinny jeans. The straight light brown hair she usually wore was now no more; tight brown curls flowed down her bare shoulders like a stream of chocolate silk. Her makeup was just perfect, her fair skin complementing the rosy hue she wore on her cheeks as well as her thick, silken lashes.
On an average day, Krista would have been thrilled to have such an appearance, considering she was rarely satisfied with her looks. However, tonight was different; she simply didn't care. She had tried countless times to forget about her last meeting with Mason, but like a tattoo, it was seared into her mind.
With a faint knock on the door, Grace entered the room with a placid smile on her face. Stuffing her hands inside her front pockets and leaning against the wooden doorframe, she asked, "So, where are you going out tonight?"
"Blake's party," Krista responded monotonously, her eyes fixed on the grounds.
"Then, I guess it's safe for me to say, no alcohol, no drugs, and no sex." She said jokingly with a playful smile on her face; it was ludicrous to Grace to even have to mention that miniature lecture to her daughter because she was confident that Krista would make the right choices; she trusted her.
Krista, however, said nothing and simply sat still, her eyes still glued to the floor. The smile Grace wore a few seconds ago unraveled at the seams and turned into a concerned frown. Approaching the bed, she sat on the edge and placed her hand on Krista's knee, "Sweetie, is everything okay?"
"Would you believe me if I said yes?" Krista sniffled, lifting her chin up and meeting her mother's gaze. Tears rolled down her cheeks, unable to be withheld any longer.
"Oh, sweetheart, come here." Grace breathed out quietly, pulling Krista into her warm embrace. She ran her fingers through Krista's hair, trying to calm her cries. "What happened?"
Krista sniffled, clutching tightly onto her mother's shirt. She wanted to tell her the truth, but when she summarized the story within her head, it sounded ludicrous. To fall in love with a guy in less than three days was absolutely nonsensical; it just wasn't possible...or even real. "School's just really stressing me out," She choked out, fascinated by how smoothly her lies rolled off of her tongue. "But I'm better now."
"Are you sure?" Her mother questioned, still not fully convinced. Furrowing her eyebrows, she pulled away and said, "Because if you need anyone to talk to, I'm here for you. You know that, right?"
Krista nodded a weak smile on her face. Quickly wiping the lingering tears on her face, she stood up on her feet and said, "I better get going, don't want to be late for the party."
Grace studied her daughter intently; trying to decipher any hidden messages or pleads entrenched in those profound cerulean irises. "Okay." She said, pursing her lips into a tight line for a brief pause. "Have fun, then. I expect you home by eleven."
"Alright, bye. I love you." Krista smiled, pecking her mom quickly on the cheek. At the sound of the doorbell, she scuttled out of the room and down the stairs. Opening the door, she greeted Chris with a sweet smile as she brushed her hair back behind her ear. "Hey,"
"Hey," Chris breathed out with a broad grin on his face. "You look beautiful,"
Krista laughed sardonically, "Oh the irony," She said lowly to herself before shutting the door behind her and walking toward his car. "Thank you. . .for the compliment."
"I only speak the truth."
Krista trudged down the school hallways, running her fingers through her silky brown hair. She stuffed her hands inside the large pocket of her sweater as she made her way toward her locker. Seeing her reflection in the miniature mirror she had inside her locker, a weary sigh escaped her lips. The confidence she wore so well everyday had dissolved.
All she could think about was Mason; she kept reliving the same night over and over again. The loneliness and hurt she felt the first time only multiplied. She wondered if his bruises and cuts had healed yet and how he even got them in the first place.
“Krista?”
At the sound of her name, she turned around and met the soft chocolate spheres of Chris. She couldn't help but to feel her heart drop; she secretly hoped the deep voice behind her had been Mason's instead. "Oh hey, Chris." She said uninterestingly, turning back to her locker.
"I heard what happened between you and Mason. I'm really sorry..." He said apologetically, leaning against the lockers beside Krista's.
At the sound of his words, something snapped inside Krista. She slammed her locker and turned to meet Chris' gaze with her cold, icy stare. "Whatever the fuck you heard, I don't need anyone's sympathy. I don't even know how you people find these things out. It's fucking sick."
"Krista, hey I'm really sorry if I offended you in any way, but that wasn't my intention. I just wanted to see if you were okay because I was worried about you. You don't have to be such a jerk about it."
Realizing what she did, Krista softened her gaze immediately and brushed her hair back behind her ear. "I'm so sorry, Chris. I shouldn't have blown up on you like that. I'm just really stressed out right now, that's all." She said, rubbing the temples of her head with her forefingers.
"I guess that means you won't be attending Blake's party tonight." Chris stated rather regretfully.
"I, well, uhm, no, I'll be there." She stumbled through her words. "I need to stop being a stick in the mud, right?" She smiled half-heartedly.
"Great, I can't wait to see you there. Can I pick you up, or am I pushing my luck?" He smiled goofily, revealing the dimples embedded in his cheeks.
"Sure, you can pick me up." Krista said, nodding her head. "I'll see tonight, then."
Krista brushed down the soft fabric of her black ruffle tank and the back of her faded, heavily distressed skinny jeans. The straight light brown hair she usually wore was now no more; tight brown curls flowed down her bare shoulders like a stream of chocolate silk. Her makeup was just perfect, her fair skin complementing the rosy hue she wore on her cheeks as well as her thick, silken lashes.
On an average day, Krista would have been thrilled to have such an appearance, considering she was rarely satisfied with her looks. However, tonight was different; she simply didn't care. She had tried countless times to forget about her last meeting with Mason, but like a tattoo, it was seared into her mind.
With a faint knock on the door, Grace entered the room with a placid smile on her face. Stuffing her hands inside her front pockets and leaning against the wooden doorframe, she asked, "So, where are you going out tonight?"
"Blake's party," Krista responded monotonously, her eyes fixed on the grounds.
"Then, I guess it's safe for me to say, no alcohol, no drugs, and no sex." She said jokingly with a playful smile on her face; it was ludicrous to Grace to even have to mention that miniature lecture to her daughter because she was confident that Krista would make the right choices; she trusted her.
Krista, however, said nothing and simply sat still, her eyes still glued to the floor. The smile Grace wore a few seconds ago unraveled at the seams and turned into a concerned frown. Approaching the bed, she sat on the edge and placed her hand on Krista's knee, "Sweetie, is everything okay?"
"Would you believe me if I said yes?" Krista sniffled, lifting her chin up and meeting her mother's gaze. Tears rolled down her cheeks, unable to be withheld any longer.
"Oh, sweetheart, come here." Grace breathed out quietly, pulling Krista into her warm embrace. She ran her fingers through Krista's hair, trying to calm her cries. "What happened?"
Krista sniffled, clutching tightly onto her mother's shirt. She wanted to tell her the truth, but when she summarized the story within her head, it sounded ludicrous. To fall in love with a guy in less than three days was absolutely nonsensical; it just wasn't possible...or even real. "School's just really stressing me out," She choked out, fascinated by how smoothly her lies rolled off of her tongue. "But I'm better now."
"Are you sure?" Her mother questioned, still not fully convinced. Furrowing her eyebrows, she pulled away and said, "Because if you need anyone to talk to, I'm here for you. You know that, right?"
Krista nodded a weak smile on her face. Quickly wiping the lingering tears on her face, she stood up on her feet and said, "I better get going, don't want to be late for the party."
Grace studied her daughter intently; trying to decipher any hidden messages or pleads entrenched in those profound cerulean irises. "Okay." She said, pursing her lips into a tight line for a brief pause. "Have fun, then. I expect you home by eleven."
"Alright, bye. I love you." Krista smiled, pecking her mom quickly on the cheek. At the sound of the doorbell, she scuttled out of the room and down the stairs. Opening the door, she greeted Chris with a sweet smile as she brushed her hair back behind her ear. "Hey,"
"Hey," Chris breathed out with a broad grin on his face. "You look beautiful,"
Krista laughed sardonically, "Oh the irony," She said lowly to herself before shutting the door behind her and walking toward his car. "Thank you. . .for the compliment."
"I only speak the truth."