All Your Fault

Alexis giggles, “You know what I can’t wait for? Adoni. I can’t wait to see what kind of outfit she wears on the first day back.”
I chuckle, holding the phone up to my ear. “I know, me too. She’s so weird, I don’t get why she acts like that.”
“She’s a witch! Remember?” Alexis squeals, bursting into laughter. “What a fucking loser.”
“I know,” I smirk, shaking my head. “I have to get to bed… don’t want to be late for school.”
“Lame,” Alexis whines.
“Suck it up. I’ll call you-” I don’t even get to finish before she hangs up, uninterested with me anymore. I sigh, tossing my cell phone on the small table beside my bed before switching off my light, crawling under the covers. Summer vacation is over, which means I have to go back to school, back to the judgemental people and hate-filled eyes. They all hate me for what I did to Paisely.
I didn’t sleep very well through the night, although I’m not surprised. I haven’t been getting a full night sleep since Paisely died. Too many nightmares, too many thoughts running through my head, refusing to let me sleep. Annie requested I go see a therapist or a doctor, someone that could help me get some sleep at night, but I shrugged it off. I didn’t want to talk about Paisely with anybody. I wanted to forget about her altogether.
And I would do everything in my power to make that happen.

“Why are they all staring?” Claire whispers, gazing at all the people standing in the hallway, glaring at us. At me.
“Because we’re pretty,” Alexis smirks, before adding, “well at least I am.”
I roll my eyes, following the two girls down the hallway, towards our first period class: Math. We all had it together, although I doubt it was out of luck. Alexis and her family has a way of pulling strings, making sure Alexis has everything she wants. Because you don’t want to see Alexis when she doesn’t get what she wants.
We walk into our room, taking the three seats at the back of the room. We wouldn’t do any work in this class. The teacher was an old woman, she didn’t care about the students in her class. She was a total pushover, so we could do whatever we wanted.
Students poured into the room, taking their seats and pulling out their binders. Most sat with their friends, sat with people they knew or people they would get along with. Some sat by themselves, looking around awkwardly at the room full of people they would never speak to. Althoguh I didn’t show it, I felt for them. I have been in their shoes before I met Alexis.
And Paisely was in their shoes after.
I shudder, shaking off any thoughts of Paisely. This was a new year, a new beginning. I was going to forget about her and have a happy life--without her.
“Oh my god,” Alexis gasps, a smile erupting on her face. “Look at this.”
Claire and I look up to see what Alexis was smiling about. We both broke into a silent laughter.
Adoni walked into the room. Her look was… unique, to say the least. But to Alexis, unique wasn’t good. Unique was something to laugh at.
Black skinny jeans clung to her legs, holes and tears stretching from her knees up past her thighs. I imagine there were more tears underneath her knees, but I couldn’t see because of her boots. Thick, heavy black combat boots laced up all the way to her knees, ending just past a the holes in the knees. A baggy dark purple t-shirt that hung down to her mid-thighs. It was ripped and had holes all throughout it. Covering her t-shirt was a leather jacket, a white skull was stitched into the back, and buttons and pins covered the front. Her black, straightened hair was pulled to the front of her face, covering her eyes that were rimmed with black eyeliner. It was hard to see at first, but Adoni had purple streaks in her hair. They didn’t look real, but they were there. And they meant something.
Alexis and Claire covered their faces, trying unsuccessfully to hide their laughter. I, on the other hand, was doing no such thing. I wasn’t even laughing.
I was too busy trying to pick apart the knowing smile plastered on her face.
Adoni marched to the back of the room, sitting in the seat directly in front of me. She smirked at me, flipping her hair off her shoulder.
“What the fuck are you wearing?!” Alexis giggled, pulling at the leather jacket.
“She looks like she walked out of a Halloween shop,” Claire joined in. Alexis and Claire looked at me, waiting for me to add something. Even Adoni turned around, smiling at me.
“What, you don’t have anything to say?” she tilted her head sideways, batting her eyelashes. “Did you use up all your punch lines and jokes on Paisely?”
Adoni smiled, turning back around in her seat. She had won, and she knew it.
“You’re such a freak,” I mutter, opening my book. Our teacher walked in, attempting to get the class to calm down. Everybody in the room ignored her, continuing with their conversations.
Everyone but Adoni and I.

When lunch rolled around, Alexis demanded we meet her in the cafeteria. I told her I would run to my locker quick and then meet up with them. She gritted her teeth, walking away from me, angry because she wasn’t getting what she wanted.
I tossed my books in my locker, reaching for my lunch when I felt a tingle run down my spine. I shuddered, looking around.
Adoni was standing right beside me, playing with the black nail polish on her fingernails.
“What do you want?” I demand.
Adoni smirked, looking up at me.
“I came to see if you liked my hair,” She tossed her hair around, making sure I saw the purple. “Paisely looked so pretty with it, I thought I’d give it a try.”
“It isn’t even real,” I say, grapping on the purple and pulling it right out of her hair. “Just clip-ins. You’re such a loser.”
Adoni chuckled, nodding her head. “Please, like I haven’t heard that one before.”
She walked in front of me, meeting my eyes. “You’re a terrible liar, Mattie. You truly are.”
“What are you talking about?” I spit, clenching my fists.
“Acting like you don’t miss her, like you’re glad she’s gone. They might believe it, but I see right through you.”
“Good for you,” I push past her.
“Mattie, you should listen to what I have to say.”
“Why should I? I don’t care about Paisely, that’s not a lie.”
Adoni smirked. “She misses you.”
“Would you just fuck off!” I whip around, yelling in her face. “Paisely is dead. Dead, dead, dead! She’s not a ghost, she can’t be contacted. She’s not coming back! Ever! She’s gone!”
Adoni doesn’t even flinch. She just continues to smile. “If only you know, Mattie.”
“Just stop,” I whisper, pulling at the roots of my hair. I didn’t want to deal with Adoni. I wanted to go and sit with my friends and forget about Paisely. She’s gone.
“She’s not gone. And she I can get her back.”