Trying Not to Love You

The next few days Ronnie and I had nothing to say to each other. I was hanging out with Mika a bit more because he was trusting me with his bass and such like. He was a good laugh too so I wasn’t phased by Ronnie at all. I found myself hanging out with Claire too, just us. We went to bars each night that we could and when we were stuck on the bus travelling taxed every alcoholic source in sight.
We got to the next city on day five and had that day off. The previous night Claire and I had been on the crew bus [I’d been sharing her bunk because it was easier] and hammering vodka and sambuca shots like there was no tomorrow. The morning of our day off I stumbled off the bus into the rest stop parking lot in just my cowboy boots, black shorts and my red leopard print bra. Fuck knows where my shirt went. My hair was sill stuck up from the night before’s hair spray and backcombing session and my aviators covered my eyes. There was an empty Jack Daniels bottle in my hand, yet again, I don’t know why and the sun was blazing down.

“Voddddd! Get me a burgerrr!” Claire yelled.

I turned around and she was stood on the stairs wrapped in a toga.

“Dude…you’re wearing a toga!” I grinned at her, trying to keep my balance.

“Dude…you have no shirt on!” she laughed back at me.

“Oh yeah…have we ran out of booze?” I asked looking at the empty bottle in my grasp.

“Yeahhhh, dude, get more!”

“Kay, kay!” I spun on my heels and continued my precarious route to the shop.

I got to the door and heard my name called again.

“Whaaatttttt!” I groaned.

The other people passing me were giving me the strangest with just cause.

“Vod, what the hell are you doing?” it was Derek on his own.

“Getting’ more Jack of course!” I said slowly, “What chooo doin?” I smiled.

“Getting food. They’re not gonna sell you shit unless you put a shirt on and get rid of that bottle. Tony will throw a fit if he catches you. You reek of booze, what were you doing? Bathing in it?” He gently tugged me away towards the bands bus and threw the empty bottle in the nearest bin.

“Probably,” I nodded.

Next thing I’ve got a New York Dolls shirt on and Derek was leading me back into the store. We successfully emerged with Jack, Coke, Jager and sandwiches about half an hour later.

“Do you wanna come back to our bus and hang with us?” Derek asked as I looked around wildly for some unknown reason.

“Let me go get Claire and we’ll be right over!” I almost yelled and skipped toward the crew bus, which she was aboard.

Along that ten-yard journey someone passed me. They had aviators on, totally black clothes and a hood up with long shiny black hair spilling from the front.

“And I jizz in my pants,” I said quite loudly with a smirk across my face, glancing back. The line from The Lonely Island song seemed perfect for the moment. I was still presuming it was a he while the person looked back at me with a similar smile across their inviting snake bitten lips.

I reached the bus and called out, “Claaaaaiiire! Got booze and food and the band wants to hang out with us!”

“Gah! Good thing I decided to get dressed!” my violet haired friend emerged in blue Capri jeans, stiletto Mary Janes and a Cinderella band shirt, which was actually mine.

“I should get a shirt of my own. Hold this,” I passed her the carrier bags as I rifled through the bag of clothes and shit, which I’d brought from the band’s bus when I decided to bunk up with Claire the other night.
I took off the NYD shirt and stuffed it into the carrier bag with Jager in it then pulled on my own black Lady Gaga vest. We quickly brushed our teeth to get rid of last night’s filth, she donned her sunglasses and we hopped off the bus and steadied each other on our way to the FiR bus. We got to the top of the stairs and the place was deserted, though the back lounge door was closed and any noise seemed to be coming from that direction.

“Hey I got an idea. Pull your pants down,” I giggled.

Claire did what I said and sat on the kitchen counter top. After a few minutes of her fake screaming and moaning the back lounge door flew open then one by one there was a whole bunch of incredulous sounds following.

“Gotcha!” Claire and I yelled when I got up from my knees.
She still had her underwear on but we were pretending that I was going down on her.

“Typical of you to fuck with us!” Mika pointed at me as Claire pulled her jeans back up.

“Absolutely,” I nodded.

“Get back here, we got company,” Derek told us as they all disappeared to return to their seats. So we charged on back as ordered.

“Vod, you really are disgusting sometimes,” Jacky complained at me over the conversation, which was already in progress.

“Yeah I know. Funny though,” I took a swig from my Jager and leaned against the open door.

“You gonna introduce us or be rude?” Claire asked.

Ronnie was talking to…fuck…the guy I passed in the parking lot. At least it was a guy though, which I could tell by the voice. He still had his aviators on but so did Claire and I as we looked like shit underneath and I’m not one for hypocrisy.

Ronnie realised the situation and looked up at as, “Oh yeah, sorry. This is Max. You may already know him,” he said.

Claire leaned on the table and took a close look, what a drunken fool.

“Already making a move? You don’t waste time!” I laughed.

“Shut up slag! I was just wondering if this is the guy I’m thinking it is or if Ronnie’s fucking with us,” she retorted while still leaning down.

‘Max’ took off his shades and Claire jumped back.

“It is! Nice to meet you, I’m Claire the merch girl,” she exclaimed all bubbly and friendly.

“I forgot you guys were friends again,” I mumbled, evidently it was quite loud for what I thought was a mumble.

“What?” Jacky looked at me in astonishment, “You actually know who Max Green is?”

“She didn’t tell you, did she?” Ronnie smirked.

“Tell me what?” Jacky looked between Max and I with a little panic written across his face.

“Ronnie you jizz trough! You didn’t have to say it like that.” I pouted, “Bro it’s nothing to worry about. I may have stolen your ETF CDs at one point or another and taken a shine that’s all.”

“And all this time you’ve called me a faggot for it! You…you…oh fuck you.”

“Shhh,” I passed him my Jager to shut him up.

“So I take it you’re Jacky’s sister,” Max spoke up looking a little smug.

“Yeah…as if it wasn’t obvious. I am actually working on this tour, well not right now, right now I’m getting drunk but its nice to meet you and, and, and I’m I should be quiet now,” I took my Jager back from Jacky and gulped a load down to silence the haphazard babbling.

“Welllll if you’ve got such prestigious company we should probably go back to our bus to continue this so you can be civilised in here,” Claire tapped the door and backed up a few steps.

“No its fine, isn’t it,” Ryan told us but sought approval from his band mates.

“Dude, we’re gonna get louder and more obnoxious. If you guys actually wanna party you know where we are.” I said turning to leave.

Before anyone could say anything to discourage us we had the JD, Jager and sandwiches on the crew bus. We slammed on a play list of Bullets and Octane, Buckcherry and Reckless Love then proceeded to drink until we passed out or ran dry. We essentially did end up running dry between just the two of us, possibly. It got a little hazy after an hour.
When it got dark out Ryan, Derek and Mika came to get us and carried us off our bus and onto theirs. We danced and got even more drunk [that was somehow possible]. Next thing I remember is Claire and I outside on a lawn area having a fight with water guns full of schnapps and vodka. Originally we were using them for fun drinks then got a bit silly.
From the darkness another spray hit me. When I realised it was Mika I tackled him to the ground and we were wrestling for a while then eventually we were pulled apart. From my bleary eyed insanity I found it was Ronnie who had grabbed Mika and Max who had me.
-And I jizzed in my pants – [not really]

“Where were you guys?” I asked trying to catch my breath and regain my balance.

“At the bar in there,” Max said.

“Took you bitches long enough. See what happens when we aren’t supervised!” I pointed to Mika then laughed.

“Just cos you lost,” Mika said.

“Lost? Wanna rematch bitch?” I said and moved forwards only to have Max pull me back again.

Mika stuck his tongue out and laughed at me while I grumbled some random insults.

“Who wants vodka?” Claire was at my side with both our guns at the ready.

“Hit me,” Ronnie said nodding at her.

Claire’s aim was shocking she covered him in it. Ronnie was speechless while the rest of us laughed. He just stared at her then all of a sudden ran to her, picked her up and vanished into the night.

“Well that’s the end of that chapter,” I declared while dusting my hands of metaphorical dust.

“Jager?” Mika announced in a sort of question.

“Jager!” I said definitively.

“Jager,” Max nodded.

Mika grabbed one of Max’s arms, I grabbed the other and we hurried back to the bus in search of Jager. Fuck knows if there was any left. As soon as we got up the stairs we found Claire and Ronnie entangled just as I had been with him the other day. My blood ran cold without any consent. I rolled my eyes and continued past to the back lounge. Needed Jager. I dropped onto the sofa and exhaled loudly. No idea where Jacky or Ryan or Derek were but Mika and Max exchanged glances before looking down at me.

“I could murder some Steel Panther and Jager right now,” I smiled.

“Are you alright, Vod?” Mika asked sitting beside me.

“Of course!”

I sure liked Ronnie but I didn’t like him enough to let that kinda bullshit ruin my night. I wasn’t even pissed at Claire somehow.

“Alright then, lets see what we’ve got left to drink,” Mika stumbled around blindly.

I stayed silent with absolutely nothing going through my mind. Trouble was switching it back on when Max spoke up.

“You look sad. Don’t be sad,” he pouted and sat beside me.

“I’m not sad. Don’t be so cander…condin…con-de-scend-ing. Condescending. ” I eventually managed before another sigh, “Are you drunk?” I asked bluntly and turned to face Max while Mika crawled around the floor.

“Uhhhh yeah a bit,” he responded exhaling loudly.

“Can I play with your hair? Its really niiiice,” I tried to do some kind of cute expression but they never worked.

“Uhhh yeah if I can hug you,” he nodded.

What a strange thing to say.

I frowned but nodded, “Deal.”

Max didn’t give me much chance to move. From my side he wrapped his arms around mine so I was imprisoned in a fashion but it was ok. I leaned into him and as my hands were free I carefully ran my fingers through his lush soft hair.

When I woke up the clock on the wall read 06:30. I knew I was still drunk and soon realised I was lay across the sofa where I must have passed out in Max’s arms. He appeared to be asleep behind me, still enveloping my body as I recognised the tattooed arms to certainly be his. I closed my eyes once more and fell back to sleep quickly.