Would You Miss Me?

What if I had killed myself. Would anyone miss me?. I feel like everything is my fault. My stupid phone screen shatters and it cost a lot of money to fix it. Money we don't have. So my family has to eat less. It was my fault. We already can't afford the phone. I don't know why I got it. Just selfish. I cut again. Not deep. But deep enough to hurt. I feel numb again. I've been crying a lot. I see all these people who have no problems but constantly complain about random stupid shit like "ewwwww my stupid mom packed me a sandwich with the crusts on" it annoys me. My family can't afford lots of things that we should. Why can't I have what other kids have? My fault again. If I had never been born my sister would have more food and clothes. If I killed myself no one would care. I don't blame them. If I were them I wouldn't miss me either. Every night since the beginning of December I either cry myself to sleep or pass our. I hate myself. I hate everything about myself. I hate my flabby stomach. I hate my double chin. I hate how I get sick so easily and everyone thinks I'm faking it. I hate how stupid I am. I hate that I'm crying writing this. Mostly I hate how it's my fault my family can't eat right because we don't have the money to. No one would miss me if I killed myself.