Manage Me

I watched Katie scamper to the pool house and close the blinds before slumping against the counter. I felt like an idiot. Obviously, I had freaked her out. I didn’t want her to feel obligated to go on a date with me, I wanted her to want to go on a date with me. And it really didn’t seem like she did. I extracted my phone from my pocket and scrolled until I found Cassadee’s number. If anyone was going to help me out of this mess, it was her.

“Hey Barakitty, what’s up?” She asked cheerfully.

“I think I fucked up big time, Cass.” I sighed heavily.

“What happened?”

“I kind of asked Katie out on a date…”

“Kind of?” Her words were slow, as if she couldn’t fully comprehend what I had just told her.

“Well no. I did ask her out. On a date. And then I might have maybe… kissed her?” I said, cringing.

“Jack! What!?”

“I don’t know!” I wailed. “We were just at the store getting stuff like normal and then some jackass came up to her and pissed me off and Katie too and then she told me he was her ex and was all quiet and then when we got home she tried to apologize and I told her not to because the kid was a straight up douche and then we almost kissed but we didn’t and I just asked her to go on a date with me and she tried to say no but I begged her not to and then we kissed and now she’s hiding out in the pool house.” I said all in one breath.

“Okay. Slow down and repeat.” Cass said after a moment of complete silence. I took a deep breath.

“Katie and I were at the store and some guy showed up and was a total asshole and Katie got really upset so we left. And she didn’t say anything until we got home. And then she told me he was her ex, but she sounded really mad about it, like even worse than when I talk about Holly, and she tried to say she was sorry for how she acted, cause she told him off, and I told her not to since what I wanted to do to him was a lot worse. And then we just kinda leaned in towards each other, but she stopped it and then my question just popped out and this time we did kiss after I convinced her to say yes. But then she freaked and ran in the house. I wasn’t trying to force her to do anything…I just…I couldn’t help it…” My voice sounded hopeless.

“Well obviously their relationship didn’t end well if she was that upset about it. And she probably wasn’t expecting you to do that after seeing him, but I’m pretty sure you’re not forcing her to do anything. Katie is a strong girl. If she didn’t want to go out with you she wouldn’t. I know she likes you, Jack. I’ve watched the way she acts around you and you should have seen her when she came over that morning she agreed to move into the pool house.”

“But she didn’t seem excited about it.” I paused. “Do you think…should I cancel it?”

“No!” Cassadee’s indignant cry startled me and I ended up smashing my head onto a cabinet above me. I winced and rubbed it but didn’t get a chance to say anything seeing as Cass was now ranting. “If you do that she’ll just think you felt bad for her or were playing around or something! This is your shot, Jack! Be a fucking man and sweep her off her feet. You like her so fucking act like it! Don’t pussy out because you’re afraid she’ll reject you! She already agreed to the date so make it the best one she’s ever been on.”

“How am I supposed to do that, though?”

“Oh my God, you didn’t think of anything did you?!”

“I wasn’t exactly planning on asking her out right then, it just happened!” I cried, pulling on my hair in frustration. Cass took a deep breath as if to calm herself.

“Okay. You know Katie better than I do, but I’m pretty sure she’s not the type of girl who wants to sit around in a movie theatre or stuffy restaurant. Just think about all of the things she’s told you and go from there. But keep it simple. Now I gotta go cause I happen to have a date as well.”

“Okay.” I pouted.

“Cheer up Jack Attack, I have faith in you.”

“Thanks, Cass.”

“Anytime. Now get to planning!”

Cassadee hung up and I sat there, thinking. The clock told me it was nearly seven which barely gave me an hour to work all of this out. I knew I needed to make this good, and Cass was right, I did know Katie. She would hate it if I spent a lot of money on her or if we couldn’t talk. She would want to be able to be loud and have fun. A light bulb went off in my head. I had the perfect idea. Without hesitation I ran up the stairs and into the shower. Now that Katie was here and I was actually learning how to stop being a slob, I always had clean clothes. After making sure I smelled good, I pulled on a pair of jeans and one of my many JAGK shirts. I had five minutes to spare so I took a deep breath and slowly made my way into the back yard. I knocked on the glass door, holding my breath.

“Just a minute!” Katie called out. Three seconds later the door opened.

I grinned. Her hair was slightly damp, curling around her shoulders. She was just wearing shorts and a sweatshirt, but she looked absolutely incredible. I hadn’t been lying when I told her she could make a burlap sack look perfect. I held my hand out for her and she took it with a shy smile. Without talking, I led her to the car. She went to open the door, but I beat her to it and she blushed slightly before climbing in.

“So, where are we going?” Katie asked as we drove out of the neighborhood.

“It’s a surprise.” I winked. She pouted. “You’ll like it, I promise.” I laughed.

“You won’t know that for sure unless you tell me.” She gave me a sugar filled smile.

“Nope.” She crossed her arms across her chest and pouted again. “How about a distraction?” I offered. She raised an eyebrow. “20 questions.”

“Only if I get to go first.” She stated, legs curling under herself slightly as she turned to face me.

“Okay, deal.”

“Where are we going?”

“That’s cheating!” I laughed. “And I won’t tell you, so don’t waste your questions.” I teased, throwing her own rules back at her.

“Meanie.” She mumbled.

“What are you, three?”

“I’m four.” She stated, sticking her tongue out at me. “And it’s my turn to ask the questions, Mr. Barakat.” For some reason, the way she was saying it now, didn’t bother me one bit. Actually, it was kinda hot.

“Fine, fine. Ask away.”

“No. I’m gonna make you wait now. I’ll spring them on you when you least expect it.” She gave me a wicked grin and I just shook my head.

“Whatever you say, Katie Feist.”

She giggled and turned the stereo up, singing along softly. I let a comfortable silence settle in the car. We were close now, just a few more minutes. I think Katie noticed because she suddenly perked up, eyes darting around as her posture straightened. There was a glow that finally appeared on the horizon and I saw a smile split her face.

“Jack…are we at the carnival?” Her voice was full of excitement. I nodded and she actually squealed.

I beamed. I knew this was perfect. She bounced in her seat as I searched for a parking spot and shot out of the door when the car stopped. I followed her lead only to find her standing completely still, just staring at the brightly colored lights. She turned when she sensed me come up behind her.

“I haven’t been to the carnival since high school.” She whispered, turning her face towards me.

“Let’s not waste any time then.” I grabbed her hand, pulling her towards the entrance. “Oh, and that counted as your second question.” She didn’t even get upset, too excited about the carnival to care.

I got our tickets and soon we were both wandering around, Katie trying to decide where she wanted to go first. Every once in a while she would throw out a question. She was down to 10.

“So, your favorite food is Sloppy Joes, you’re Lebanese and anemic, you play golf, your birthday is June 18, you pierced your ears because of Mark Hoppus, you like to Macarena and your favorite word is thrust.” She summed up as we walked.

“Yep. 10 questions left, Miss Feist, how do you plan on using them?”

“Not sure yet.” She shrugged, tearing a piece of cotton candy and stuffing it in her mouth. “I’ll think of something.”

I reached down and laced my fingers through hers. She looked up at me, her cheeks tinged pink, and I smiled down at her. She ducked her head for a moment and then met my eyes again.

“What’s tour like?”

“Insane.” I laughed. She smiled and I stared into the sky, closing my eyes as I thought about it all. “It’s like an endless party. I get to spend every night doing what I love with my best friends. And the fans are amazing. They wait around for hours just to see the show and then they’ll stay even later just to see us, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Listening to their stories, hearing them tell me how our music has changed their life…it makes me feel like I’m not just some goofy dude with a guitar. I’m a part of something bigger, you know?”

I felt a light kiss on my cheek and turned my head to see Katie dropping her heels back to the ground. There was a kind of sadness in her eyes, though her face held a soft grin.

“You’re amazing, Jack. I hope you know that.”

I didn’t respond, opting to just gaze at her instead. She bit her lip and I started to lean down towards her. She pulled her hand out of mine suddenly and took a few steps away. I felt a twinge of hurt, but tried my best to keep it from showing.

“Race you to the Ferris Wheel!” She cried before disappearing into the crowd.

“Katie!” I called after her, but all I got in response was a giggle.

I chuckled and launched myself after her. She was small, which gave her an advantage when it came to maneuvering through everyone, but my legs were longer. I managed to catch up with her just a few feet away from the base of the wheel, grabbing her around her waist and lifting her off of the ground.

“Jack!” She squealed. “Put me down!”

I laughed at her spastic movements as she tried to break away. Instead of letting go, I just calmly made my way towards the Ferris Wheel, like it was no big deal. However, Katie’s flailing had attracted some attention and I suddenly found myself nearly trampled by three teenage girls. They all worse excited grins on their faces.

“Are you Jack Barakat?!” One of them squeaked out. Katie stopped struggling.

“Yeah.” I smiled. They looked at each other and let out a short scream before the same one turned back to me.

“Can we please have a picture with you!”

“Sure.” I shrugged, setting Katie down.

They thanked me and I signed a few things before telling them goodbye. Katie had moved a few feet away, leaning against the side of a game booth. She had a smile on her face as she gazed at me. I walked to her, taking her hand in mine again.

“Is it weird when that happens?”

“Not really.” I stated as we joined the line for the Ferris Wheel. “I mean, it was at first, but after a while you kind of get used to it.”

“Gosh, you’re such a rock star.” She teased, leaning into my side slightly.

“Only in bed.” I waggled my eyebrows at her. She grimaced and tried to pull away but I tightened my hold on her.

“Why do you always do that?”

“Do what?”

“Say things like that to me.” She mumbled, looking down. I frowned in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I’m your maid, Jack. But you don’t act like I am. I mean, we’re on a date right now, after all. I just don’t understand why. Why do you treat me like that?”

We had reached the front of the line by now, and the operator ushered us onto a seat. I slung my arm over the back, making sure Katie couldn’t get to far away as I contemplated the best way to answer her question. He dropped the bar across our laps and we began to move.

“Because I like you.” I finally stated, deciding the simplest truth was probably the best.

“But why?”

“Because you’re cute. And you’re funny and sweet and pretty badass, not to mention downright sexy, when you get pissed off.” She blushed, no doubt remembering the incident from earlier today. I lowered my lips so that they were next to her ear. “And because you saved me from myself when no one else could.”

She looked up at me, gnawing on her lower lip. I brushed a stray piece of hair away from her face gently, gazing at her with soft eyes. She turned away, the wind whipping her long blonde locks away from her neck. I caught sight of the tattoo again and couldn’t resist tracing it with my fingertip. She let me for a moment before reaching up and pulling my hand away. Her head turned again and her blue eyes met mine.

“What does it mean?” I asked quietly.

“The tattoo?” I nodded. “Maybe I’ll tell you someday.”

The small smile on her face was bathed in sadness and I wanted nothing more than to take her in my arms and kiss her until it went away. The ride jerked, coming to a stop just as we reached the top. Katie looked around at the sky, which was filled with nothing but stars and the faint glow of the carnival lights.

“Thank you, Jack.” She whispered.

“For what?” She shifted her eyes to me again.

“For tonight. It was wonderful.”

And then she moved her small fingers through mine, cementing our hands together. She leaned her head onto my shoulder without a word. We sat there in silence until the machine jerked again and we began to make our way back to the ground.