Yesterday's Feelings

John was home. He'd been home now for a couple of days, I was thankful he was back, Dani was thankful he was back, the dogs were thankful he was back. The only person that didn't seem too happy was Rachel. They were still walking on eggshells with each other. He hated her for what she had done, which, in all honesty wasn't the John I knew and it was hard for me to admittedly understand.

John sat near the fire, Dani had been asleep in her bed for ages, I took my seat in John's lap and kissed his lips, "I'm glad to be home."

I smiled some, "Yeah? You have a funny way of acting like it.." My voice dropped off as I twirled one of his dreads around my finger.

John shrugged, looking toward the glass door, "Eric's not here he's doing stuff and she's here. I don't get why she's even here. All she does is cause trouble."

I shook my head, "No, John, she's... Being here is good for her." I said, following his gaze.

"How can you say that? She hurt you, she hurt Eric, she hurt my entire family." John's voice was one of astonishment, I was defending her.

"I forgave her for what happened a long time ago." I was quick to interject, "I mean, did Eric even really tell you why she is here? She means well and she's doing a good job with Eli. She's changed and a better person." I said, pulling back a bit from John.

"No, he didn't, but I don't care. She's a bitch and she's trouble and she shouldn't be here." John argued. It wasn't really his nature, that I'd seen for him to be so angry sounding, so bitter. But here was that side of him, it was strange to see.

"Hey, don't talk about her like that. You know nothing about how hard she's worked since you guys have been gone. She's a good mother and she's working on herself. You know Eric wouldn't have even bothered if he didn't think she was worth his time." I pointed out, which was the truth.

"I can't believe of all the people, you're defending her." John rolled his eyes.

I stood up, "Why shouldn't I defend her? We're friends. I know it's hard for you to believe but she wants to change. Whether her and Eric work things out is up to them but the least I can do is befriend her. She's in a tough place and that's what she needs." my voice raising and drawing John's eyes away from the fire and back to me. "Believe it or not, someone took me in and befriended me once upon a time too John. I was scared, I was alone, I was in some fucking strange guy's house and..." I sighed and looked at him, "You were the only one who gave a god damn. What makes her so un-deserving of the same thing?"

John rolled his eyes, "You weren't a cheating, lying whore who destroyed a family, turned siblings against each other—"

"No, you two pit yourselves against each other on your own because you each think you know best. You're both pig-headed and stubborn." I interrupted, having distinctly remembered a fight or two between them about me.

John rubbed a hand over his face, "She doesn't belong here and I don't want her here."

"Well it's a little late for that John, she's here now. Besides, if she leaves, where's she gonna go? She doesn't have anyone. We're all she has, Besides, you know that Eric would be incredibly hurt if you drove her away." I stuffed my hands in to my pockets, "Look, you need to give her a chance to show you she's changed. She's been through a lot of stuff and she's made some mistakes." I paused, reflecting back on my own mistakes, "We all have and no one is perfect. Not even you."

John stayed quiet, leaning forward in his seat and reaching out to put his hands on my hips, "I know." John's voice was quiet as he brought me closer to him, looking up at me. "I just don't know how to get over what She did to Eric, how she lied to us, and hurt our family."

I brought a hand down to rest on John's shoulder, "It's going to take time, you just have to give her that chance."

We stood outside for a while, eventually coming inside when the fire died out. It was a surreal feeling to have to talk John's anger out. He wasn't usually one to get mad, at least that I had seen. Then again, I figured that you never really knew someone until you lived with them. I just hoped that he could give her a chance and keep an open mind.