Yesterday's Feelings

After seeing Eric and John, I kept in touch more with John than with Eric. Talking with Eric was still awkward, still hard. I didn't know how to take in everything that had happened to Eric. That he had moved on and that he had fallen for Rachel's bullshit and that there was a little boy he had fallen in love with. I had never Eric as the type to want kids or who would have kids. But, I don't know, it was still a foreign concept. In-fact, either John or Eric and children was a foreign concept to me. Perhaps because I had never seem them interacting with kids.

John had called a few days after our date, he was hoping to see me again before he left. I agreed to another date and I was planning on going until Danielle fell ill. I couldn't just call a sitter, no reputable one would risk themselves getting sick and playdates were out of the question. I had no choice but to cancel, "John, I'm sorry. I have to cancel out date."

John's voice fell, "Are you sure?" He paused, "Is everything okay?" He sounded like a hurt child. As though he had done something wrong, Which wasn't the case at all.

"Yeah, everything's fine. It's just that Danielle is sick and the sitter won't come watch her." I said sighing as I covered up Danielle as she layed on the couch, snuggled up with her favorite stuffed bear and watching cartoons. She was listless and not even smiling she was really sick.

"Oh." John said, sounding bummed, "Is she okay?"John asked, a wave of concern coming through over the phone. I had never really heard him speak in that tone, well, I had, but, it had been a while.

"Yeah, she's just got a fever and is laying on the couch being listless. I've been trying to get her to drink juices and eat chicken broth." I sighed, "I'm sorry, Maybe I'll catch you the next time you're in town?" I asked, hoping that John wouldn't be too terribly upset.

"Next time? Why don't I just come over tonight and we can hang out." John asked, "I don't mind, really. I mean, if I can't take you out, I can just sweep you off your feet in a night in." John said softly. "You talked so much about her on our date, I was kind of looking forward to meeting her before I left. She sounds like an incredible litle girl."

I smiled and nodded a little. "Sure, I'd like that and I'm sure Danielle would like it too." I admitted, blushing quite a bit. "You're sure you want to risk getting the flu just to go out on the 'date'?" I asked him, "I guess," I paused, "I'll be expecting you at six then?" I asked.

John's voice perked up as soon as I had accepted his idea of a makeshift date. "Great, I'll be there at Six." He paused, "I can't wait to see you, the both of you."

the conversation ended and I felt like things were a little surreal. The house was a mess and I wasn't even remotely dressed or ready for John to come and 'hang' and 'stay in' with us. I felt like the house was not going to be clean enough and to be honest with Danielle sick, I didn't have enough time to worry about cleaning it up too much.

The only cleaning I got done was the cleaning of my shirt when Danielle threw up on it. I sighed and changed it, just in time because as I checked the time, there was a knock at the door. I answered the door and the smell of chinese food came wafting in through the door. I blushed a little as my stomach growled, I didn't even realize that I had forgotten about dinner for myself, trying to keep Danielle hydrated and from puking everywhere (that was a challenge in and of itself).

John smiled and hugged me as he came in, "I thought Chinese and some movies would be a good choice." He said, leaning down to peck me on the cheek. He was just in jeans and a RedBull beanie hat but he could pull that off and look so... well, he just looked as gorgeous as I had remembered when I first met him.

"Cliche." I said with a smile, "But thank you, it's greatly appreciated." I said, leading John in to the kitchen where he could set the food down and we could dish up. "You by chance didn't bring—"

"Soup?" John asked, chuckling as he set the bag on the counter and pulled out a large container of soup. John smiled.

I smiled and kissed his cheek, taking the container from him, "You're the best." I said softly, getting out a coffee cup and filling it with soup. I fetched some saltines and headed out to see Danielle. I gently got her to sit up on the couch and set the soup on the coffee table.

"Just try babygirl, please." I begged her, leaving it on the table and coming back to John.

John was watching me, his gaze following me. "You're really worried about her." John said as I came back. It must have been so horribly obvious and written all over my face. "It's cute." John said as he scooped some rice on to his plate following by some sweet and sour pork and egg foo young.

I dished myself a small plate with the chow mein, some sweet and sour pork, and egg foo young. "Yeah well, she's never been this sick before and I'm just trying to get her through till I can get her to the doctor you know. She's never been this sick." I said softly, staring at the couch where I could hear slurping. She was eating the soup.

John set his plate down and came over to wrap his arms around me, "She'll be alright Ari. If she's at all related to you, she's strong. She'll be just fine." John said, kissing my cheek before he uncurled himself from around me and headed for the living room where Danielle was.

I sighed and watched him, I could see the top of her little head as John sat next to her. I saw him lean down to talk to her and she was responding, looking up at him. I couldn't hear what they were saying. All I could see was them and just them sitting there together. It was kind of cute, watching them. Danielle reached up to touch one of John's long dreads. The most movement and life I had seen from her all day was when she was with John.

—

John walked out and sat on the couch next to the little girl, her long hair in braided pigtails. She was wearing her pink bathrobe and pink slippers on. She looked a bit like Ari, mostly in the eyes. "Hi, I'm John." The much older man said to the little girl as she looked up at him.

Danielle looked tired, she was pale, sniffly and obviously sick. She brought the spoon to her mouth as she looked up at John, her eyes falling over the older's dreads and then moving back to his face, "You have funny hair."

John smiled, leaning in closer to the young girl, "Yes I do."

Danielle reached up to touch one of the locks of John's hair, "It feels funny." She said.

John laughed, "I suppose it does." John said, his blue eyes looking down at the six year old.

"Are you my babysitter for tonight?" The little girl asked, looking at John. Her eyes were big and brown and she was almost pouting.

John shook his head, "No, See that lady over there," John said, pointing to Ari. Danielle turned her head to look at Ari who was watching them, "She's really nice and refuses to leave you because you're sick with the flu. So I decided to come to her."

Danielle turned again to look at her sister, "Do you like my sister?" She asked, looking up at John.

John looked back at Ari and then leaned down close to Danielle, "I think she's pretty nice and she seems like she takes real good care of you. So yeah, I guess I like your sister."