The Rules of Life

“Kinley, stop fighting me!”

I stopped for a moment. “Mr. Hardacker?” I asked. We were outside the cafeteria, almost down the math hall. I squirmed a little more, for good measure, and Mr. H finally gave a sigh of frustration and let me go. He gave me a light push in the direction of his classroom. I paused, looking from the direction of the school entrance to Mr. Hardacker’s classroom.

“Don’t even think about it,” Mr. Hardacker warned. “You’ll only get yourself in more trouble.” He grabbed my arm now, apparently not trusting me to make the right decision, and steered me towards his class. He unlocked the door and pulled me in. “Sit down.”

“I’m not in class,” I pointed out. “I don’t have to listen to you.”

“McKinley, sit down. Now.” I’d never heard Mr. H sound so demanding. Usually he was a pretty laidback teacher but he seemed seriously pissed off. I filed this tidbit of information away, in case I ever needed to push his buttons again. But rather than make him even madder now, I took a seat in the front row, forbidden territory any other time except now. I clasped my hands in front of me and placed them on the desk. There were scratches, embedded deep into the fake wood. I wondered who made them.

Mr. Hardacker leaned against his desk, his arms crossed over his chest. The sleeves of his button up were rolled up and his tie was loose. I almost laughed. Girls would be falling all over themselves to be in my position. “McKinley,” Mr. H began, “what on earth made you think it was a good idea to punch Travis Elton, our star middle linebacker?”

If I knew anything about football, maybe that would have made sense. I shrugged. “He was being a fuckface. Someone had to put him in his place.”

“Kinley, he’s a football player, and a strong one at that.” My lip gave a sharp throb, reminding me of its presence. In all the hustle, I’d forgotten. But now that the adrenaline had worn off, the pain returned. I must have winced because Mr. H squinted at me and came closer. “Did he get you?”

I scoffed. But it wasn’t very effective, since blood seeped into my mouth and I ended up gagging. Mr. Hardacker gave me some tissues and the trash can. I spit into the garbage and wiped my mouth. “He wishes,” I said. “I fell. But that’s not the tune he’ll sing.” I tossed the tissue into the trash and rolled my eyes. “Boys and their testosterone.”

Now it was Mr. H’s turn to roll his eyes. “Let me see your lip,” he said. I made my best pouty face, even offering up my puppy dog eyes. “Cut the begging, Kinley. It’s not me you need to be sucking up to.” This turned my pout into a frown but I couldn’t say anything, on account of my teacher pulling my lip down.

“Ow,” I mumbled.

“It looks fine,” he said. “You said you fell?”

I nodded and messaged my lip carefully. “Into a table. It put up a better fight than Elton.” Mr. Hardacker cracked a smile. “So… How much trouble am I in?” The smile went away and Mr. H lifted his eyebrows. “That much, huh? Great.” I exhaled and looked up at the board, where there were a few unfinished problems written. Someone had tried to solve them but had apparently run out of time. They were easy enough. My fingers itched to solve them. “Can I?” Mr. Hardacker looked up at the board, where I was looking, and shrugged.

“Go for it.”

I went up to the board and frowned, calculating the problem in my head. Already my anger started to subside. I scribbled the answer by the first problem and moved on to the second one. It took me all of two minutes to finish the five problems. I was about to go and re-check my answers when the phone rang. Mr. H shook the shocked look off his face and grabbed the receiver.

“Hardacker,” he said. It was ironic, really. The only attractive teacher with the last name heart acher. How many girls had mooned over this guy? The phone call didn’t last very long before he looked up at me and hung up the phone. “Come on. The principle wants to talk to you.”

-

I wasn’t the only one the principle wanted to talk to. Travis Elton, Sophia Martin, and Dash Sheppard all sat in the fake leather chairs in the office. Travis held an icepack to his face, looking unhappy, and Sophia looked pissed off, with her arms crossed over her barely covered chest. She pushed the dress code to the limit. Dash still looked smug as he sat, legs outstretched before him. I wanted to punch him, too.

We were waiting in the office while Principle Tanner finished up with Amber, who had gone in first. Being the victim gave you first speaking rights. I wished that Mr. Hardacker had stayed. He was the only teacher likely to help me out. Not that there was much he could do. I threw the first punch. That made me the bad guy, even though it was all Sophia’s fault. If she hadn’t wanted to be so cruel to Amber, I wouldn’t have stepped in. Of course, I shouldn’t have stepped in at all. If Amber had given him the note, maybe Travis wouldn’t have snatched it. But he did and he acted like the asshole he truly was and goddammit, he deserved to be punched.

The door to Principle Tanner’s office opened and a seriously washed-out Amber walked out. All of her make-up was gone, cleaned off by her tears, and she looked worse for wear and depressed. From the curl of her shoulders, Principle Tanner must be a super awful listener.

He looked at me and nodded his head. “Miller, you go next,” he said. Thank god. I didn’t want to sit here and wait while everyone else bribed him to believe them and take all the punishment out on me. I got up from the chair and walked into his office, which didn’t look much different from the main office. The walls were the same color and the chairs were still made of fakey leather. There was a bookshelf and lots of pictures, as well as a laptop sitting on a wooden desk. It was small in here, all cramped. Filing cabinets lined the wall behind him. I wondered how big mine was. Did I have a whole drawer yet?

Principle Tanner sat down in his chair and rested his elbows on the desk in the typical way people do when they’re about to lecture you. I braced myself. “Miss Miller,” he began, “this is the fourth time I’ve had the pleasure,” this word was said tensely, “of your company in this office. I thought this year was going to be different.”

“Old habits die hard,” I said, shrugging. It’s not like I liked coming here. But not very many people liked my idea of camaraderie. In fact, I’d been called bitch a lot. Who would have thunk it?

The principle sighed. He looked really tired, like maybe he wasn’t sleeping very well. His hair was graying and the wrinkles on his face seemed more profound every time I saw him. Oops, did I do that? “Why don’t you tell me what happened today.”

“What happened was that Sophia Martin was acting like a bitch, big surprise. She went out of her way to humiliate that Amber chick. And then Dash Sheppard played along and Travis Elton was being a complete dick so I decked him because, holy shit, that guy deserved it.” Principle Tanner didn’t say anything right away. He seemed to be thinking about what I’d said. For a moment, I thought, good. He’s finally coming around. He’ll believe me and thank me profusely for showing him how awful Sophia and Travis and Dash were.

Hey, a girl can dream, right?

“From what I’ve heard you threw the first punch,” Principle Tanner said. And that’s when I knew nothing I said would make a difference. Dash and Travis were jock royalty and they were basically given a permanent get-out-of-jail-free card. Sophia Martin was on student council and therefore did no wrong. But me, I was the girl that nearly got expelled last year, the one that all the teachers hated, with barely passing grades and fuck off attitude. Tanner wouldn’t go out of his way to protect me, no way. “And Amber has assured me that the note written was purely fun. It was a harmless joke, an initiation prank. You intervened and so Mr. Elton was forced to use different methods to perform the prank. If you’d minded your own business, Miss Miller, maybe this whole ordeal would have been avoided.”

I couldn’t believe it, but I wasn’t surprised. They were getting off scot free, again. After everything, they were still Principle Tanner’s favorites. And Amber had protected them, even after it was obvious to everyone, even, I assumed, Principle Tanner, that they were really out to hurt her. The things some people do for popularity. I felt sick, disgusted. If I wasn’t still awaiting my punishment, I would have left. Gotten up and walked right out the door. A part of me wanted to and I glanced towards the office door but I knew it would be automatic expulsion and I wanted to graduate more than I wanted to hold my pride up high. So I slumped into the seat, hand clutched around the straps of my backpack, and bided my time.

“I’m suspending you for three days,” he said. I stood up and slung my backpack over my shoulder. My hand was on the doorknob when his voice stopped me again: “And Miss Miller? If I see you in here again, I’ll have no choice but to expel you. We’ve given you a lot of second chances and you’ve officially run out. Have a good day.” I yanked the door open forcefully and slammed it shut behind me. It was probably a bad move on my part, pressing my luck like that, but frankly, I was pissed. Principle Tanner could build a fucking bridge and get over it.

Sophia smirked at me as I passed and even though I knew I should resist the urge, I felt compelled to say something. “I hope your parents are proud of their skanky bitch whore.” And then stalked off. Not my best line, but it succeeded in striking Little Miss Priss speechless, which was what I was going for.

I left the office, ready to blow this popsicle stand but as I went to my locker to get my things, I stopped dead in my tracks.

“Dad?”