Let It Be Me

Austin zipped her duffel bag and turned to the door. She'd known he was standing there from his smell; it wasn't soap this time, but sweat and a hard day's work – both for the garage and the club. He was leaning in the doorway, hair still tussled from sleep, giving her a skeptical look.

"Don't tell me not to go," she told him as she sat on the bed. "If my mother's in the hospital, I have to go."

Jax nodded. "I know. I wasn't going to tell you not to go. I was just going to tell you to be careful and that, you know, I'm going to miss you."

Austin let a small smile slip out as he sat next to her. "I'll miss you. And I promise, I'll be careful."

"Sure you don't want me to go?"

"No, it's all right," she assured him. "Kip wants to see his family anyway, and you need to figure out what you're going to do about the manuscript."

"I know you need to go, but I wish you didn't. I don't trust anyone else with this."

Austin kissed him, holding his face in her hands. "I'm not going away forever, you know. I have the prepaid, so you can call me whenever you want. I don't care what time it is or what I might be doing. All right?"

He kissed her again, with a fair amount of passion. "I don't know where the hell you came from or how I got lucky enough for you to want a jackass like me, but I'm damn sure we're here now."

"Me too," Austin smiled. Her phone rang and Kip's name came across the screen. She answered it and told him she'd be right out. "He's out there. I better get going. I'll call you from Jacksonville, okay?"

Jax nodded and kissed her again. "Come on, I'll walk you down."

.:.

When Kip and Austin arrived in Jacksonville, they rented a car and headed straight for the hospital.

"I'll drop you off at the front," Kip told her. "I'm going to see Dad for a little bit."

Austin nodded. "All right. You'll call Clay and let them know we got in?"

"Yep, I will."

Austin took a deep breath and stared at the hospital doors. "I have a bad feeling about all of this, Kip."

"I know," Kip answered. "Figure out what happened first and we'll go from there, okay?"

She nodded again and got out of the car. Before she went in she took another deep breath, then made way for the front desk.

"My name is Austin Epps; I'm looking for Miranda Ramirez, my mother."

The lady behind the desk punched some information into the computer and nodded. "Yes, Miss Epps. We've been waiting for you. Your mother is on the third floor, room twenty-one."

Austin didn't even bother saying thank you, just hurried for the elevator. It seemed to take forever, but once on the third floor, she followed the signs to her mother's room.

The woman had wires and tubes coming out of everywhere. Her face was blue and black and barely recognizable. One arm was in a cast, one leg was in traction. Several monitors were lined up on one side of the bed.

"Miss Epps?" someone said behind her.

Austin nodded. "Yes. Call me Austin, please. What happened? They gave my father the impression that it wasn't serious."

The doctor introduced himself as William Vaughn. "Your mother was found in an alley near Onslow Drive, severely beaten. We believe she was dumped there."

Austin turned away from the doctor and approached her mother's bedside. She took the woman's hand in hers, fighting the anger that was rising in her chest. Perhaps she and her mother hadn't ever gotten on well, but this was still her mother – this was still family. No one did this to her family.

"Do they know who did this?"

"I'm sorry," Dr. Vaughn replied. "No one has come forward with any information, although the police have been trying to get any information they can. An officer will be in shortly to speak with you."

"I'll be here," Austin assured him. "Is she … will she be all right?"

"It's hard to tell right now. For all we know, she was in that alley for up to twenty-four hours before she was found."

"Thank you, Doctor."

She stayed at the hospital all day, although Miranda's condition didn't change at all. Once he was gone and the door close behind him, Austin pulled the prepaid out of her bag and dialed Jax.

"Hey," he greeted.

"It's me," she answered, although he must have known. "I'm at the hospital."

"How is she?"

"Someone beat her to within an inch of her life. They're not sure right now if she's even going to live or not."

Jax paused. "You have your suspicions."

"And I'm sure they're not far off from correct."

He recognized the anger in her voice; he'd heard it directed at himself enough times before. "Aus, this is not your fault."

"Oh, I know that. Doesn't make me any less angry."

"Do you want me to come out there?"

Of course she did, but she wasn't about to tell him that. "No, stay there. You've got your own stuff to deal with. How's that going, by the way?"

"Uh, still reading," Jax answered. His vague answer told her that someone else was in the room.

"You and me are quite the pair, aren't we?" Austin smirked.

"That we are, darlin'."

"Hey, the cops are here, so I need to go. I'll call you soon."

She disconnected the call and took a seat to answer the officers' questions. She gave them what she knew about Lance, didn't think she needed to mention Dougie, and answered anything they asked about the people her mother associated with.

"We want to help you, Miss Epps," one of them told her. "But with the lifestyle your mother leads, it's difficult usually to narrow it down to one or two suspects."

Austin nodded. "I understand."

The other officer caught her gaze and gave her a stern look. "The entire department is well aware of past events involving you and Lance Stern. I understand that you may have some strong suspicions, but it's important that you let the law handle this."

The same way they handled my problem? she thought to herself as her eyes narrowed. "Of course, Officer."

"We're also aware of who your cohorts are," the other officer added. "It would be wise that you advise them not to take these matters into their own hands."

Austin shook her head; it always came back around to the Sons. Her mother was lying near death and all these men were concerned about was whether or not someone else was going to retaliate on whoever had done this.

.:.

Kip picked her up when visiting hours were over. He asked if she had spoken with the police, and Austin gave him the run down.

"It's fucking ridiculous," Austin spat.

"Yeah, they came to talk to Dad, too. He didn't mention that I'm in town, but I guess they'll find out soon enough. You and I are going to stay in the beach house."

Austin nodded. Of course they were; no one was going to let her stay in a room by herself with Lance loose on the town. Kip's mother would kill herself before letting Austin stay in the house, so that was their last option.

She checked the prepaid on the way, seeing that she had several missed calls from Jax. She flipped the phone shut again; she knew he was probably worried, but she didn't have anything to say right now. Her interview with the police officer had left her anger mounting by the second; she was in the mood to pick a fight. Jax was the last person she needed to be fighting with right now – for both of their sakes – so when he called again, she let the call go to voicemail.

.:.

Jax flipped the phone shut and cursed. "She still isn't answering. I'm worried she's going to do or already has done something drastic."

"She's upset," Gemma told him. "You've got to give her time to sort all of this out in her head. Her mother was finally coming around to at least being her friend. Plus, the woman has no one but Austin. You should be happy that you found a girl who gets these things the way you do; your lives really aren't that different."

"No," Jax said, shaking his head. "The club put this in her head. Austin never would have killed anyone or wanted to kill anyone until she came around here. She didn't know how to handle anything before, and now retaliation is what she sees. She just doesn't know how it really works – that retaliation only leads to more retaliation."

Gemma frowned. He sounded just like his father. "Jax, sweetie, there's nothing wrong with righting wrongs. You'd do the same thing if it were me."

"Not the same thing, Mom."

"I think it is," Gemma replied sternly. "And it isn't like Austin wasn't already prone to violence. She beat the shit out of that Lance guy, kicked Dougie's face into a bloody pulp – the guy really is lucky he's still alive – and I'm sure if she wasn't so tired, that crow eater bitch would have gotten a few punches, too. I know that you care about Austin, but you're fooling yourself if you think the woman you've taken as an old lady is some damsel in distress. I'm sure she lets her guard down with you, but face it: Austin can hold her own. And, you don't even know that she's done anything anyway."

Finally, Jax stood. "That's it. I'm going out there. I'll leave in the morning."

He kissed Gemma's cheek and shook hands with Clay. He wasn't going to let Austin one day end up with all the questions in her head that he now held in his.

.:.

The ocean breeze came in through the window, rousing Austin from a restless sleep. Knowing she would feel better if she hadn't slept at all, she forced herself out of the bed, pulled on clean jeans and a black v-neck shirt, then slipped into her boots.

"Morning," Kip greeted. "Coffee's still hot."

"Thank God," Austin muttered. "What are you doing today?"

"Crashing Dad's office," he replied. "You going back to the hospital?"

Austin nodded. "Yeah, that's my plan. Don't know what else I'd do."

"Jax called me last night."

Austin rolled her eyes. "Here we go."

"You worried the hell out of him, Aus. What did you expect?"

"I'm just not in the best mood, and I don't want to fight with him right now."

"Fair enough. But you could at least acknowledge to the poor guy that you're still alive."

"Are you going to let me take the car today?"

"Don't change the subject," Kip told her sternly. "He's on his way down."

Austin threw her head back. "Shit, Kip. Did you tell him to come down here?"

"No. He told me he was coming – he didn't ask or anything like that. You know how Jax is. He's supposed to call one of us when he gets in."

"Fair enough," Austin said. "The car?"

Kip nodded. "Take it. I'll have Dad come pick me up."

She went back down to the bathroom, washed her face and brushed her hair, pulling it into a ponytail before applying some makeup to her face. Deciding she was presentable, she grabbed the keys, bid her brother goodbye, and headed for the hospital.

.:.

It took some finagling, but charm was Jax's area of expertise. A pretty, young nurse led him to Miranda Ramirez's room. Austin was there, standing at the window and looking out over the city. He could tell just from what he could see in her reflection, she was deep in thought.

He set his bag quietly down and stood behind her. "Hey, beautiful."

She turned quickly, looking up at him with tears in her eyes. "Why do you always show up when I'm crying?"

"Why are you always crying or start to cry when I show up?" Jax smiled back at her.

"You didn't have to come," she sniffled, falling into his chest as his arms went around her.

Jax kissed her forehead. "No place I'd rather be."

.:.

Later that night, they sat on the beach. Austin hadn't said much since Jax had arrived, but it was important at first just that he was there. As they looked out over the beach, she decided to finally divulge what was on her mind.

"I keep thinking about something your dad wrote," she said. "About how wrongs had to be righted by money or blood; about the pluses and minuses. I know what happened to my mom, Jax, and I know it was because somebody had a minus for me. This back and forth could go on forever. And who would be next? My mom again? Me again? Kip, my dad? Someone else in the club, or you?"

Jax sighed. "I'm not a good person to talk to about this. My life isn't any different from that, and I don't know how to tell you to change direction from this path you're facing. I know you haven't made any choices yet, but you don't have long to decide."

"I know," she nodded.

"Whatever you decide, Aus, I'm behind you."

"I can't trust anyone else, Jax. Kip will talk me out of it. So would the rest of the MC. My dad … everyone."

Jax put an arm around her. "I'm not going to talk you out of anything you decide to do. I am going to tell you that you're right; once you start with retaliation, it's going to feel like it's never ends."

.:.

The shock of finding out her mother was in the hospital in the first place had been increased when she saw the woman and then found out exactly what happened. When Austin arrived at the hospital the next morning only to discover that Miranda had passed away.

"We tried to reach you," Dr. Vaughn assured her. "But we still didn't have a contact number for you."

Austin nodded. "That's my own fault. What happened?"

"Her body couldn't handle the damage. Perhaps if we had gotten to her sooner …" he trailed off. "But, I have to be honest, her drug abuse didn't help her overall condition. She just wasn't strong enough to survive this."

"Thank you, Doctor."

The hospital had Austin sign some papers, and then she and Jax were back on their way. Austin paused behind the wheel, taking a deep breath.

"Do you want me to drive?" Jax offered.

Austin shook her head. "No, I can drive. You know what this means, right."

Jax let out a slow, deep breath. "I figured as much."

Austin nodded. "Let's go to the strip club. I want answers."