Let It Be Me

Jax.

He was still on the ground. Austin closed her eyes again and forced her lungs to take in clean air, then push out the bad air. Still struggling, she moved to her hands and knees and crawled over to where Jax laid on the ground, struggling to breathe himself.

"Austin," he sputtered. Blood drenched the front of his hoodie and dripped from the side of his mouth.

"Oh shit," she cursed under her breath. She pulled the shirt over her head and pushed it onto the wound in his chest. "Hold on, Jax. It's going to be okay. You're going to be okay."

"I love you, Austin," he said in rough voice.

"No, Jax," she said earnestly. "Don't say that. People say that shit and then they die."

"You need to know …"

Sirens finally sounded in the parking lot. Not long after, a crowd of police officers rushed in, pulling her away from Jax and commanding her to put her hands behind her head. It was only when she reached to lift her arm that she cried out in pain. Looking down, she saw the blood draining from her right side.

"Are you the one who called, ma'am?"

Austin nodded. "Yes. That one there, he's the one who broke in. The other one is my boyfriend."

The officer pursed his lips into a tight line and Austin got the feeling he was well aware of Jax's identity. The medics who had followed the police in had started Jax on an oxygen mask and were moving him onto a stretcher; Austin glanced at the officer and chanced standing up.

"Wait," she pleaded with the medics. She leaned over Jax and kissed him fiercely. "You promised you wouldn't abandon me."

Jax smirked. "I'm not going anywhere, darlin'."

The medics couldn't wait any longer; they wheeled Jax out of the apartment and down to the ambulance. The officer caught her attention again.

"Anyone we need to call?" he asked.

Austin shook her head; she was starting to feel woozy. "You know who he is. They'll be here soon enough."

"Ma'am, you should sit down. You're losing a fair amount of blood …"

She did as he instructed. Another set of medics arrived and applied several gauze pads to her wound, taping them tight to apply pressure.

"It look like a deep laceration, but we really need to get her to the hospital to be sure," one medic told the officer.

The officer nodded. "Fine. I'll have the ME's office come get the other guy; he's done for."

While one medic went for another stretcher, the other helped Austin to her room to find another shirt to wear once she was fixed up.

"I think I can probably walk down there," Austin told him.

The medic told her to take advantage of the gurney. "You're so calm right now because of all the adrenaline. You could keel over at any minute from the shock. You don't want to do that going down the stairs."

Austin agreed and followed him back out of the room. Before letting them lift her onto the gurney, she took one last look at Lance where he lay dead on the floor. She didn't know what kind of repercussions would come from this; maybe none at all. There was no telling what would happen next.

.:.

Clay, Chibs, Tig and Opie parked in front of the apartment building. Cops were everywhere and an ambulance was parked in front of the building as well. They watched as two medics wheeled a body bag out and immediately sought out someone who could tell them something.

"Three victims," one of the medics explained. "The other two are on their way to St. Thomas right now."

"Have they been identified?" Clay questioned.

The medic shook his head. "No one's told me if they have. Two males and a female were inside the apartment. Female was wounded but stable – I imagine she'll be out later tonight. This guy was killed with a bullet wound to the neck, and the other was in critical condition with a gunshot wound to the chest."

Clay reached for the zipper on the body bag, but the medic stopped him. "I'm sorry, sir. I can't let you do that."

"It could be my son!" Clay yelled, lunging for the medic. Chibs and Tig were able to hold him back, although he struggled. "You're not even going to let me know if my son is dead! You son of bitch!"

"Calm down!" Chibs ordered. "Look, we'll just go over to St. Thomas and figure out what's going on, all right?"

Clay shrugged the men off his arms and nodded. "Fine. Someone get Gemma and the prospect. They're both gonna flip shit when they find out what happened."

.:.

Kip inquired about his sister at the nurse's station of the emergency room, and an older woman directed him to a room through nearby double doors. Austin was seated in the tripod position at the edge of the bed. When she spotted him, tears flooded her eyes and she buried her face against his shoulder.

"What happened?" Kip asked.

Austin pulled back and didn't bother to wipe her tears or try to stop them. "I had a plan, Kip. It wasn't supposed to happen like this. I had this plan to draw Lance out, but I panicked at the last minute. It just didn't feel right, so I kept stalling, trying to work up the nerve …"

Kip took a deep breath and encouraged his sister to do the same. "Start from the beginning."

"All right," Austin breathed. "I picked a fight with Jax once we found out that Lance was an undercover. I knew that we couldn't go after him – Lance had to come after us. I didn't want … I didn't want Jax to get caught in the middle, so I made him leave. Lance kicked his way into the apartment. I called the cops and told them someone was breaking in. We both fired off a few shots and missed. We started arguing – I kept waiting for him to stop talking and start shooting. He was so angry, but I just kept thinking about –" Austin paused. She couldn't mention the manuscript to Kip. "—thinking about some things and I couldn't make myself pull the trigger. Jax showed up, and Lance grabbed me, put the gun to my head. Jax put his gun down and I pushed away from Lance."

"That's when you shot him?"

Austin nodded. "When I fell, I dropped my gun. I was just gripping it when I heard Lance's gun go off – that's when he shot Jax. I've never been so angry in my life, Kip. Not even when I found out what happened to Miranda. I shot Lance; it hit him in the neck. I've never seen so much blood all at once. Lance grabbed for his neck with one hand and tried to shoot at me with the other. All I've got is a deep graze. They said any deeper and it would have gone in."

Kip breathed a sigh of relief. He could see that, but hearing it was better. "It's all going to be all right, Aus. Lance is dead. He can't hurt you or anyone else anymore."

"What about Jax?" Austin pleaded. "Lance already hurt him. He could die, and it's my fault! If I would have just listened to him in the first place, tried to come up with a different plan …"

The sobs started all over again as she remembered Jax struggling to breathe as she leaned over him, her shirt crumpled up and pressed to the hold in his chest as she tried to stop the bleeding. If she lost him … she couldn't even think about it.

.:.

Gemma rushed into the waiting room, immediately embracing her husband. Clay held her, too. It wasn't in Gemma's nature to cry, but he could feel her entire being tremble with the threat of tears.

"What is it? Are they okay?"

Clay took a deep breath. "Austin's going to be all right. Asshole shot her after she shot him, so it didn't penetrate. She's got a deep laceration is all."

Gemma swallowed hard. "What about Jackson?"

"Took a bullet to the chest," Clay told her.

"Can we see him?" Gemma asked.

Clay shook his head. "He's already in surgery. They're trying to remove the bullet and repair his heart."

"His heart," Gemma breathed, sitting down. "Oh God …"

"We're all behind him," Opie spoke up. "Jax'll pull through. He has to."

Gemma held tight to Clay's hand as she sunk into a nearby chair. Without a second thought, she found herself praying – really praying – for the first time in a long time that the same fate that had killed Thomas would not befall Jackson.

.:.

While Austin was waiting for the nurse to bring her dismissal papers, two very official looking men came into her room. Kip had been dozing off but immediately sat up straight when they showed their FBI badges.

"Miss Epps, we meet again," one of them greeted.

"Ian. Not looking for a date this time, I suppose," Austin quipped.

"Funny," Ian replied, clearly not finding the humor in her comment. "Doctor says you should be fine. Lance Stern, on the other hand, was not so lucky."

"How unfortunate," Austin answered sarcastically.

"You've been made aware that Lance Stern was an FBI informant. What you were not made aware of was that he was actually an undercover FBI agent."

Austin licked her lips. "None of the FBI guys ever told me that."

"Just the same, an agent is dead, and that's something we're going to need to investigate."

"Investigate all you want. He broke into my apartment. He shot at me, and then he shot my boyfriend."

"And you shot him," Ian added.

"Austin, maybe you should wait for Rosen," Kip cautioned.

Ian glanced at Kip briefly before looking back to Austin. "You do have the right to an attorney. You're not under arrest, oath, or warrant. You don't have to answer anything."

She swallowed and weighed her options. "Yes, I shot him. He shot at me, he shot Jax, and then I shot him – it all happened in that order."

Ian sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "So you were defending yourself and Mr. Teller."

Austin nodded. "That's right."

Ian's partner shrugged. "Then I guess we're done here. Thank you for your time ma'am, and we apologize for any …"

"Inconveniences?" Austin prompted, again sarcastic.

The partner decided not even try to correct himself or where he'd been going with that sentence. Instead, he handed his card to Austin.

"My name is Perry Jones. Let the Bureau know if there's any other way we can be of assistance, Miss Epps."

With that, Ian and Perry left the room. Austin winced as she reached for the SAMCRO shirt she had brought with her; Kip unfolded it and helped her pull it over her head and get her arms through the sleeves. The nurse came in and went over all the instructions for cleaning the laceration and re-bandaging it. Austin signed the dismissal papers, then Kip helped her down off the bed and led her to where the others were waiting.

Gemma was the first to spot her. The woman rushed from her chair to embrace Austin in a tight hug. Austin returned it, apologizing profusely for Jax getting hurt.

"It's not your fault, baby," Gemma assured her. "Juice told me everything. You tried to get him out of there."

"Has the doctor said anything?"

Gemma shook her head. "He's still in surgery. Kip, you should get her to the clubhouse for some sleep."

"No," Austin replied adamantly. She took a seat in one of the chairs. "I'm not leaving him."

"We'll let you know –" Gemma started, but Austin refused to budge.

"I know he's your son," Austin replied, "But I'm his old lady. I'm not going anywhere."

Gemma kept her face stern but inside she was beaming. Every day she was convinced more and more that Austin was good match for Jax; the fact that Austin chanced fighting with Gemma to stay over going to the clubhouse to rest just proved it even more.

.:.

Hours passed before they heard anything. They asked several times for updates, but the floor staff had none to give. Austin bunched up a hoodie and leaned against Kip's shoulder, falling into a restless sleep.

Gemma sat with Clay and watched the girl sleep. Worry and concern was etched into every feature on Austin's face. Gemma had denied it every step of the way when Clay told her what he'd told Austin: that the way Jax and Austin looked at each other was the same way Gemma and John had looked at each other. Gemma knew though that Clay was right; Austin and Jax were the couple she and John were supposed to be. She thought again about the manuscript and just hoped that any changes in how Jax viewed his life would push Austin away the way John's changing perspective had pushed Gemma away.

"We can't tear them apart," she said out loud.

Clay looked at her and frowned. "What?"

"Look at her Clay. They've spilled blood for each other. How are we supposed to pull them away from each other?"

Clay sighed and made sure no one was listening. "She hasn't spilled blood for Jax, baby. Jax spilled blood trying to keep her alive and she got up in her own mess."

"If it weren't for us, the FBI never would have been interested in her in the first place. Lance never would have hooked up with Miranda … it all started with us. She let it get this bad so that there were no authorities involved. Austin is behind the Sons, one hundred percent."

"With or without Jax?" Clay questioned.

"Either way, if you ask me. She didn't try to convince him to run away like another hussy I can think of," Gemma scoffed. "She knows his attachments, his responsibilities to the club, to Charming, and to his family. And she wants to be a part of it, not tear him away from it."

Clay opened his mouth to reply to her, but the doctor that approached them stopped Gemma from paying attention. Kip nudged Austin who startled awake.

"Doctor's here," he told her.

The doctor stood in front of all of them and took a deep breath. "There were some complications."

Austin's own heart stopped. "What kind of complications?"

"We removed the bullet just fine, but when we went to repair the damage, the bleeding was difficult to isolate and stop. He lost a lot of blood."

Gemma put a hand to her chest. "But, he's … he's not …"

"He's alive," the doctor confirmed. "But the next seventy-two hours will be critical. If Jax can pull through the next three days, then he should be fine."

"Thanks, Doc," Clay said, pulling Gemma into an embrace as she tried to process the information.

"Can we see him?" Austin asked.

"He's in recovery. Let's give him a little bit of time and then we'll see about visitors."

Kip reached for her hand and squeezed it. "He's going to be all right, Aus. Jax wouldn't leave you."

Austin nodded and sat back down. It was going to be a long three days.