Let It Be Me

One Month Later

She ran her fingers over the scars from the surgery and the gunshot wound on Jax's chest, giggling as he whispered ridiculous nothings in her ear. Jax's fingers found the sensitive place on her ribs where a scar had also formed from where the bullet had grazed her. Even on good days, Jax found himself reaching for that scar – a silent reminder of how close he had come to losing her.

"Stop thinking about it," Austin whispered, moving his hand away from her side.

Jax let the hand settle on her stomach. "I'm sorry, babe."

"Don't be sorry," Austin replied, shaking her head. "Just stop thinking about it. It's over and we're both alive. That's all that matters."

"Yeah, you're right. And hey, after today, I won't have to work around that cast whenever I want to jump you."

Austin laughed. "You're right about that. In fact, I need to get in the shower, get ready for my appointment."

"Sure you don't want me to go with you?" Jax asked as she stood up from the bed, fishing a couple of towels from a nearby laundry basket.

"To the shower or the doctor?" Austin teased. "I know it's not the shower because we still need to take it easy on your heart. And as for the doctor, I'll be fine. They're just going to cut off the cast, x-ray the arm to make sure the bones set right, then send me on my way."

Jax sat up and lit a cigarette. Austin disappeared into the bathroom, shutting the bathroom door behind her. Seconds later, a knock sounded at the bedroom door and Clay's face appeared.

"You got a minute?"

Jax nodded. "Yeah, of course. What's up?"

Clay heard the water start in the shower. "Austin?"

"Who else?"

Clay tipped his head. "Hey, what goes on in here is your business, not mine."

"What'd you need, Clay?" Jax prompted. He was beginning to get irritated with Clay.

"Now that your heart is in the clear, just want to make sure your head's in the right place," Clay told him. "You're in line with the Sons, right? Where the club is at?"

Jax frowned. "Yeah, why?"

"You had a close-call, Jax. Makes a man re-think things sometimes."

Jax shook his head. "I'm not re-thinking anything. I know where I want to be."

"And Austin? She knows that, too?"

"Something I should know?"

"No, just making sure. I gotta take care of my club and my family. You and Austin, that falls into both categories."

Jax waited patiently while Clay surveyed the room. He wasn't nervous; it had been Austin's idea to build a false bottom into one of the drawers to hide the copy of the manuscript Piney had given them. Turns out his old lady was pretty good at hiding things.

"Fair enough," Jax commented.

"All right. I'll leave you to it then."

Jax nodded and waited for Clay to leave before getting up and locking the door. He had a sudden desire to take a shower.

.:.

Austin had listened to the whole conversation carefully. She'd learned a long time ago how to listen through doors, thanks to all of her mother's indiscretions. Barclay had used that same tone with Miranda as Clay had with Jax, so she knew it well. Clay was looking for something, anything to show that Jax was on the wrong path. He'd asked one too many questions about her, too.

The doorknob turned, and Austin took a step back, wrapping one of the towels around her body. Jax stepped into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him again.

"You heard that?"

Austin nodded. "Why is he so hellbent on this?"

"Clay wants to stay in control. That's all. He'll do whatever he has to do to keep his money coming in."

"He's going to split us up, Jax. All the shit that's happened, he thinks I'm a liability. He doesn't know –"

"He doesn't know you like I do," Jax interrupted her.

"That doesn't matter. He's not going to forget what brought me here in the first place. But I'm not a rat, Jax. I'm in this, for the long run. With or without you, I stand behind the Sons."

"Hey," Jax cooed, taking her face in his hands. "Nothing is going to happen to you. This isn't about you. It's about me."

She didn't entirely believe him but nodded just the same. Jax pushed his boxers down his legs, then unwrapped the towel from around her. He pressed his body against hers, and she accepted his kiss.

"Your heart …" Austin cautioned him, her hand trailing over the scars again.

"I know. And you've got your appointment. Just take a shower with me, okay?"

Austin kissed him again, wrapping her legs around his waist as he lifted her into the shower.

.:.

Gemma watched Jax kiss Austin before she got in the Charger and left for her appointment. Jax headed back for the garage, smiling at his mother as he passed. Clay caught on to Gemma's look and joined her in the office.

"You talked to him?" Gemma asked.

"I said I would," Clay replied.

"And?"

Clay shrugged. "I think we're all right for now."

"So you'll leave them alone?"

"Gemma, I love the both of them. You know I do. Thing is, whether it's Jax or Austin that start pushing against the club, it's still my job to keep that under control. They may not have the manuscript anymore, but the ideas are already in their heads. Austin is a good woman, but she knows how to sway Jax."

"You see the way he looks at her? Jax loves Austin, Clay. He's not going to give her up without a fight."

"Right now, there's no fight to be had. Just keeping an eye on things."

"All right," Gemma sighed.

.:.

Half-Sack backed away from the office and returned to the garage. No way he could possibly be hearing things correctly. What could Jax and Austin possibly have going on that he didn't know about that Clay and Gemma might be against? Only one way to find out – and he was going to find out from the person less likely to bullshit him.

"Hey, Jax, man. Can I talk to you for a second?"

"Sure, what's up?" Jax replied, not even looking up from under the hood of the car.

"It's important."

"All right."

Half-Sack wasn't making himself clear. He leaned against the hood and spoke as quietly as possible. "Why would Gemma and Clay be talking about keeping an eye on you and Austin?"

Jax let out a deep breath and crossed his arms over his chest. "When did you hear this?"

"Few minutes ago. They were talking in the office."

Jax pursed his lips. "Look, there's just some things I can't talk about. It's my shit though – Austin hasn't done anything."

"Look, I trust you with her. I know you want to be with her and that you'll protect her. I need to know that protection extends to everyone and anyone. I need you to tell me that my sister – my only sister, my baby sister – is not in any danger."

"She's safe with me," Jax assured him. "And if that changes at any point, I promise that you'll be the first to know."

Half-Sack held out his hand, and Jax accepted the handshake. Maybe he should have Austin talk to her brother about the manuscript. At the same time, maybe it was better he didn't know.

.:.

Jax closed the manuscript – his copy, in a new binder – and let out a deep breath. John Teller's ideas certainly had been significantly different from the way the club was ran now. Now that Jax had been able to read the whole thing, all that was left to do was to decide if these were the ramblings of a bitter, lost man or something really worth taking into consideration.

"Hey there, handsome," Austin smiled, slipping into the room before shutting the door behind her. She held out both arms, showing that the right one, while slightly smaller than the left from atrophy, was free from any sort of cast, splint, or brace.

"Look at you," Jax grinned, setting the manuscript to the side. "Congratulations, darlin'."

She sat next to him. "Doing some reading, huh?"

"Yeah," Jax nodded. "Sure you don't want to read it."

Austin shook her head. "No, I think I've read enough."

Jax picked up the binder and put it away in its proper hiding place. When he returned to the bed, he pushed a strand of hair away from her face and kissed her softly.

"Do you love me?" he asked.

Austin looked at her hands in her lap. "We haven't known each other that long, you know."

"That was not my question," Jax told her, forcing her eyes to meet his.

"I don't know. I care about you a lot. I hate being without you. When I thought you were going to die, it was like my heart was ripping in two." She smirked. "This all sounds like crazy pussy shit."

Jax shook his head. "It's vulnerable honesty. Something you and I aren't always very good at."

"I hate being vulnerable."

"I know," Jax whispered, cupping her chin and kissing the tip of her nose. "But you know that you're safe with me. I know you thought I was just saying it because I had just gotten shot and all but it wasn't. The only horrible thing about dying would be being without you. I love you, Aus."

She looked at him and processed a million thoughts at once. She thought of everyone who had ever abandoned her, every horrible thing that had ever happened to her, and the way that had made her. The day she arrived on the Teller-Morrow lot, she was angry, bitter, and broken. Maybe she was still mostly those things, but Jax was smoothing out her rough edges. If it weren't for Jax and the other Sons, she'd never know what lengths a family was truly willing to go to for one of its members. Everyone had a place they belonged within the family; Austin realized that maybe being with Jax wasn't just about being an old lady or the giddy feelings she got about him. Jax was where she belonged.

With a nervous sigh, she finally replied, "I love you, too, Jax."

Jax laughed – not because it was funny, but the kind of laugh that only comes when someone is ridiculously happy. And having Austin, hearing her say those words and mean them, that made him ridiculously happy. He pulled her to him and kissed her with everything in him.

"Good. Then you can have your Cast Off Day present."

"Oh, really?" Austin giggled. "I never guessed you'd be one for such romantic gestures."

"That was before you, beautiful."

She giggled again, this time rolling her eyes. Jax took her by the hand and led her out to the main room in the clubhouse.

"Hey, Happy, you ready?" Jax asked.

"Yeah, man. Set her in that chair, I'll get my stuff."

Austin raised her brow. "Excuse me?"

"He's taggin' ya, Aussie-girl," Chibs smiled from not far away.

Jax knelt down in front of Austin. "I love you. You love me. I want everyone to know that you're mine and that you're protected by the Club."

"A crow?" Austin asked, raising her brow.

"It's up to you."

Austin took a deep breath. Telling him that she loved him was one thing; getting a tattoo for him was a whole other step. One she decided she was willing to take.

"Where should I put it?" she grinned.

Jax kissed her again. "Wherever you want to put it, babe."

.:.

A few hours later, Austin was admiring her new tattoo while she laid in bed with Jax. The crow on her right forearm reached all the way from her elbow to her wrist. The menacing bird held a reaper's scythe in its beak. Austin was a little unsure about deterring from the traditional crow like Gemma had, but everyone agreed it was fitting for her.

Jax propped himself up on his elbow and admired the tattoo as well. "You're in deep now, Aus. No going back."

"I know," she smiled. "Think Clay'll still question my loyalty?"

"Doesn't matter. I never will," Jax promised. "But who knows what shit Clay and Gemma are going to come up with."

Feeling optimistic for the first time in a long time, Austin rolled on top of Jax and kissed him soundly. "I say, let 'em bring it on."

.:..:..:.