Let It Be Me

Clay had warned him to let Austin patch up the gash on his chest, but Jax was reluctant to do it. He wanted to believe he could do it himself, but just washing the mess off was more than his already stiffening muscles could handle. He threw the warm washcloth into the sink and went to go ask for her help, only to find that she was already leaning in the doorframe.

"Now who's sneaking up on people?"

Austin smirked. "Was just seeing how long your stubbornness was going to last before you let me help you. Sit on the stool there, I'll go get the first aid kit."

Letting out a deep breath, Jax did as she said. She returned moments later and opened the box, reviewing over the supplies. She turned the warm water back on and wet down the washcloth again, gently cleaning the blood that had dripped from the cut just a couple inches under his collarbone down his pectoral muscle and onto his abdomen.

"Clay made it sound like maybe you just had a scrape. This is more serious than I thought," she commented.

"Yeah, well. He probably didn't want to spook you out of cleaning it."

Austin took a deep breath. "I know I'm not supposed to ask questions –"

"Then don't."

"—but earlier you said that things were shaky for the club, and then whatever happened tonight with the Mayans happened. All I want to know is if I should be worried about my brother. Well, more worried than I usually am."

"Right, what I said earlier about things being shaky," he said, mischievous smirk on his face. "That wasn't exactly true. I just kind of wanted to win the argument."

Austin looked like she might punch him right on that fresh cut on his chest. "So if that was a lie then I don't have to be that worried, then?"

Jax didn't say anything. He certainly wasn't going to explain to her what had happened, and there wasn't any other way to assure her about Half-Sack's safety or lack thereof. Once the wound was clean, she dug around for the antibiotic ointment and spread a thin layer over the cut and the area around it.

"Your hands are shaking," he noted out loud.

"Yeah."

"You on something? Or off something, and that's the problem?"

"Nope."

He believed her, so he didn't ask what else would be the matter. She found a square of gauze and used the medical tape to secure it over the cut.

"I appreciate you doing this. Clay said Gemma's been more stressed than usual lately, so he's trying to not worry her unless it's necessary."

"You're welcome. It should be all right for tonight. We'll check it again in the morning," she told him, closing the box and leaving to return it to its spot under the counter.

Jax pulled his shirt over his head and followed her out to the main room. "Why did you come to Charming?"

She shrugged. "Kip."

Jax shook his head. "That's not enough. Why did you come here to find Kip without calling or writing or anything like that?"

"I didn't want to be in Carolina anymore."

"Why did Kip ask to take off for a week to go out there when you're here now?"

Austin licked her lips before answering. "Take care of some family shit, I guess."

"Same family shit that brought you out here?"

She rolled her eyes. "Good God, you don't give up, do you? If Kip wants to go back to Carolina, it's of his own accord, and it isn't my influence or decision. I came out here because Carolina got shitty and I wanted a new start. If you want me gone so bad, all you have to do is say so and I'll find that new start somewhere else."

"Why can't you give anyone some straight answers?" Jax demanded.

Austin narrowed her eyes. "I don't ask any questions about your stupid MC bullshit, so how about you just butt the hell out of my business?"

She made to storm past him, no doubt her intent to retreat to her room and slam the door, but Jax caught her by both arms. His grip wasn't enough to hurt her but it certainly wasn't the softest of holds, either. She was close enough that her perfume invaded his nose and weakened his senses. He was reaching a point where he couldn't figure this girl out. He didn't want to be around her, but he couldn't help himself to entertain certain thoughts when she was in that short denim skirt or let her wavy hair hang down to her waist.

In that brief moment of vulnerability, Jax let his forehead fall against hers. Austin stayed where she was, and he watched her eyes close and listened as her breath quickened in anticipation. Jax leaned down just slightly to move his mouth closer to hers, and reality struck him. This was Austin, the girl who was still keeping secrets and who he had never wanted here in the first place.

Slowly, he let his hands fall from her arms and took a couple steps back. "Sorry."

Austin opened her eyes and let out a breath. "Do I owe the Sons answers about why I'm here?"

"Not really," Jax answered. "Until it starts affecting the club negatively."

"Fine. Then I'd appreciate not having to hear about it anymore unless that point comes."

"Fine."

Austin nodded once more before following her previous intention and retreating to her room, although she didn't slam the door like he'd thought she would.

Jax ran a hand through his hair. He couldn't believe he'd almost kissed her – or that she was about to let him kiss her. There was already tension between the two of them, he figured, and this was just going to add another kind of tension. No getting around that.

.:.

The day before the new prospects were going to be officially announced as prospects, two of them came by the clubhouse to speak with Clay. The one Austin thought she recognized was there, and she couldn't help but stare at him from where she stood serving drinks behind the bar.

"Austin," Kip said, waving a hand in front of her face. "What's up? Are you all wet for that new guy or something?"

She gave him the same look any sister would give her annoying older brother. "No. He just looks familiar is all."

"Name's Dougie Stern, if that helps."

Austin's mouth formed into an 'o' as realization washed over her. That certainly helped. She wished with all her heart just then that she was Gemma Teller-Morrow so that she could have some sort of influence over who was brought into the club and who wasn't. Wait; maybe she didn't have to be Gemma. Maybe she just needed Gemma to put the word in for her. That, however, would require telling Gemma what had happened and she couldn't bring herself to do that. Asking to have a prospect removed from the charter for personal reasons seemed like a negative impact to her, and she wasn't about to put everything out there for the MC to know. So, she clamped her mouth shut and told herself to deal with it.

Kip frowned. "Something wrong?"

"What? Oh. No, sorry. Do you want a beer?"

He shook his head. "No, I'm good. Actually need to get going. I'll see you tomorrow night."

Austin waited for Kip to leave, then walked out to the office, looking for Gemma.

"Austin? Everything all right?"

"Yeah, I just needed to ask you a question."

Gemma sat down her paperwork and laid her glasses on the desk. "Go ahead."

"If I was in the market for a gun … something small but effective … would you have any suggestions on where I could find something like that for a decent price? And maybe without the cops knowing?"

"Sweetheart," Gemma started, leaning back in her chair. "Why would you need a gun?"

"I want it for protection."

"Oh, shit. Is this about all the stuff I told you the night the boys were in that brawl?"

Austin shook her head. "No, not at all. That stuff is why I haven't asked about this sooner or just figured it out myself."

"I'm not going to ask about the cops," Gemma said, standing to retrieve her purse. "The less they know the better. Here – this one isn't too big or weighty. No serial number. But you didn't get it from me."

Austin weighed the thing in her hand. "This is exactly what I was looking for. We can keep this between us right?"

Gemma eyed her suspiciously. "For now."

Austin tucked the gun in the back of her pants and hugged Gemma fiercely. She could easily see why everyone loved this woman so much.

She waited until after work the next day to catch Clay and ask him about the neighborhoods that might have good apartments in town.

Clay frowned. "You sure you're ready for that?"

"Yeah," Austin assured him. "I've been here over a month now. The prospects are moving in, and there's no reason for them to have to share a room."

"Maybe no one told you how it works with prospects, but they know they get what they get and that's that."

"I just don't want to step on the club's toes any more than I already have, Clay. I want to, you know, be a big girl and have my own place."

"You're not stepping on anybody's toes," Clay corrected. "But, you want your own place, that's fine. I'll send Juice out with you in the morning and get the guys to load everything up while you sign papers. There's a complex not too far from here that will have a space open for you, guaranteed."

"I don't suppose SAMCRO has anything to do with that," Austin smiled.

Clay only smiled back, ruffling her hair. "Get your stuff packed up and have it ready."

Austin thanked him again and headed back to the clubhouse. She didn't have much to pack except for her clothes and the few pictures, and they all went back in her bags. She took a shower and checked out the phonebook for a couple of furniture places. She was making a list when Jax poked his head in, knocking on the door.

"Hey," she said. "What's up?"

"The room looks cleaned out," Jax noted. "You going somewhere?"

"Don't sound so excited," Austin joked. "I'm just moving to an apartment tomorrow. Juice is going with me in the morning to this complex Clay said would have a spot open. I'm about to go look for some furniture and stuff right now."

Jax ran a hand through his hair and let it rest on the back of his neck. "This doesn't have anything to do with the night of the brawl, does it?"

"What would the brawl have to do with me getting my own place?"

"I didn't mean the brawl."

Austin realized he was talking about what had happened – or, rather, almost happened – between the two of them that night. She remembered how concerned she had been at the depth of the cut, how humble she knew he had to have made himself to let her help, and how her hands had shook as they moved over his muscles.

"It doesn't have anything to do with you, Jax. I'm just ready to be on my own and out of the club's way."

"You're not in anyone's way," Jax told her.

"That's what Clay said, too. Don't worry though," Austin smirked. "I'm happy to come over and bounce out any skanky crow eaters any time you need me."

Jax barked out a laugh. "That's good to know. You really don't have to leave."

"No, I do. It's okay though. I'm still working here, you'll still have plenty of time to glare at me and give me endless amounts of shit."

Jax shook his head and rolled his eyes. "I guess we didn't get off to the best start, did we?"

"You think so? Because I thought we were going to be best friends from the start." Austin looked up at him from where she sat on the bed, list in hand. "I know you didn't want me here, and I didn't really help with how I acted."

"For whatever it's worth, I'll be a little bummed not to see you around all the time."

Austin's mouth dropped in surprise, but she had to admit her feelings weren't far off from the same. "And I'll be a little bummed not to be around all the time."

Jax smiled at her, and her heart beat a little faster. Before the blush could creep up, she looked back down to her list.

"Well, I'll let you get to it," Jax said.

"Hey, Teller," Austin called after him. "I could use some help with the heavy lifting. I know it's a Friday night, but if you have some time before the crow eaters show up …"

Jax nodded. "Sure. Let me get the keys to my truck."

Austin nodded and put her list in her purse. She transferred the gun from her waistband to her purse and then dug her cash savings from its stash and put it in her wallet.

"Ready?" Jax asked.

"Ready," she confirmed with a smile.

.:.

When they returned to the clubhouse, Jax helped her transfer the few things she had brought home that day from the bed of his truck to the back of the van, which they would use to move her tomorrow. The furniture was set to be delivered in the early afternoon, and Gemma was going to take her to find the rest of what she hadn't found tonight the next day.

"Well, you're all set," Jax said. He looked to the clubhouse; people were already spilling out of the doors and the music was blaring. "You going to join the party?"

"I do still live here for one more night, and the movers aren't coming until later in the morning," Austin replied. "I guess I could party while I'm here."

Jax gave her that Teller smirk. In the last couple of weeks since he had almost kissed, his mind had stopped trying to convince him that she was trouble. He didn't care anymore why she came to Charming, only that she was there. This latest development of finding her own place only proved to him that she looked out for the MC and tried to do what she could to help. She hadn't been put in a position yet where that would cost sacrifice on her part, but Jax trusted her.

Deciding to take a chance, he held his hand out to her. "You think your brother would have a problem with you partying with me?"

Surprise came over her face again, then she shrugged. "Jax, I don't want to sound like a bitch, but –"

He knew what she was thinking. "I'm not looking for another crow eater, Austin. That's why I'm asking you this now."

"A moment of vulnerable honesty from Jax Teller," Austin sighed. "Never thought I'd see the day."

He chuckled and held his hand out again. "You going to make me look like an idiot?"

Austin seemed to consider him for a few more moments before slipping her hand into his. "I guess not."

Jax grinned and led her up to the clubhouse. He opened the door for her, placing a hand on the small of her back as they walked forward.

"I'm going to put my purse up," Austin said into his ear. Jax nodded and told her he would get her a drink.

Half-Sack was behind the bar and served up a beer for him. Jax asked for one for Austin, and Half-Sack looked at him suspiciously.

"Please tell me you're not turning my sister into a crow eater," Sack begged.

Jax laughed and shook his head. "No, man. I really don't even know what's going on there, but maybe I don't mind so much anymore that she's around."

"All right," Sack replied. Jax could tell he wasn't exactly giving his blessing, but he was at least going to give it a chance.

Jax took the two beers and found a free spot to stand with Bobby and Chibs, setting Austin's beer down on the nearby table.

"Hey Jax," Nikki greeted, slinking up next to him in a mini-dress that left little to the imagination.

"Nikki," Jax said flatly. "Didn't think I'd see you around here any time soon."

"Well, I just wanted to come and apologize for my little scene," she said, running a finger along his jawline. "It was uncalled for."

"Find someone else, Nikki," Jax told her. "I'm here with someone."

"I'm sure you are. But let me just remind you about when we were together …" She leaned in and gave him a lusty kiss. Jax just shook his head.

"That my beer?" Austin asked, suddenly joining the group and not looking at all like she was happy about what she had just seen. Jax nodded. "Thanks. Look, I'm just going to bed. Have to be ready for the move tomorrow. Have a good night, boys."

Jax watched her storm off, rolling his eyes. A few seconds later, a door slammed down the hall. He finished off his beer in one go and approached the bar for another one.

"That didn't take long," Half-Sack commented.

"Usually doesn't," Jax answered. He hadn't intended for anything like that to happen, especially so quickly. Perhaps it was inevitable, however, that he'd screw up something with a good girl like Austin. He was better off just sticking with crow eaters.