Silent Valentine
Love you too
"I hate it!" Kyle said, tears in his blue eyes. "I hate feeling so fucking shitty." He slammed his hand against his desk. "It's not right, ain't it? It's totally not right."
Conrad couldn't bear his friend like this. He chocked up some words. "No, it's not. Being bi isn't wrong. It's who you are, no one can change that."
"But Ashley said..."
"Screw Ashley! Who cares if she's a homophobe? You are who you are and if she doesn't like it, forget about her. You were always bi. Man, I remember you looking through your parent's records and thinking David Bowie was cute when you were little! You shouldn't hide who you are because of your old babysitter!" Conrad said, becoming more confident.
"But she said that God hates homos..."
"No, He doesn't. God loves His children and you are no exception. Ashley shouldn't matter anyways. Your fourteen and don't need a babysitter. She's just a neighbor now, man. You shouldn't constantly purge because she doesn't like one small part of you."
Kyle swallowed. "But I have to be perfect. Perfect is normal. If I feel I can't sustain perfection I stick my finger down my throat. I don't know... it makes me feel good to know I can control that. It takes the pressure off."
"Well, it's not healthy, and no one is perfect. Ashley isn't even perfect." Conrad leaned in, putting his hand in Kyle. "She smells like cigarettes and wine, threw up on the street, and told two ten year old girls who were selling cookies to fuck themselves. She is not the example of perfection. She's a chain-smoking women stuck in a mid-life crisis who uses cheep beer who knows that God will be the only man in her life."
A teary-face Kyle put his head on his good friends shoulders, crying.
"I need help."
Conrad snapped the lock on his locker, his cellphone in his hoodie pocket. The cellphone was an important thing. As he hadn't said a word in public for four years because of his selective mutism, his teachers permitted him to text responses to them, so he knew the teachers cell numbers. On one occasion he had accidentally sent a particularly damning text to a teacher, resulting in detention. However, if he was texting when the teachers were talking he would be told to put it away as if it wasn't his means of communication in the public world. A fair deal.
Conrad had something in the back jeans pocket. It was a little gift for someone, as it was Valentines Day. The day of love, joy, and peace.
"Hello Conrad," Mrs. Jacobs, said, shaking his hand as he entered the house. "It's nice that you found the time to join us for dinner."
"I've been joining you guys ever since Kyle and I became friends, and I'm not going to stop. It's not like my parent's are going to do anything for Christmas," Conrad said, grinning. "Where is Kyle?"
"He's walking Michael to the house. Speak of the devil!"
Conrad turned and saw a young man holding hands with Kyle. The two looked like complete opposites- Kyle being a tall young man with straight black hair while Michael was of a more modest height with red hair- but they were perfect together. Conrad knew it, but hated the fact.
The three teenagers sat together on the sofa after saying 'hi' to Kyle's relatives who they had to go through to get to the sofa. They talked, Michael resting his head on Kyle's lap with his head and Kyle playing with his hair.
"I don't even remember who half these people are!" Kyle said laughing. However he knew a woman who came up to him.
"Hello Kyle, Conrad."
"Hello Ashley," Kyle said, startled. Conrad gave a nod of recognition.
Who is your... um, friend," Ashley said stiffly, noticing that Michael had his head on Kyle and Kyle was playing with his hair lovingly.
Conrad looked at Kyle in his face and saw worry. Kyle swallowed, and somehow that made him summon a little courage.
"He's my boyfriend, Michael," Kyle said, his eyes wet. Conrad glared as Ashley, knowing the verses she was going to recite
In the confusion of the hallway Conrad pasted the package on the locker. In it was a CD he had made the other day. He hope his good friend Kyle would accept it, or not turn him down in bad terms.
As Conrad walked away he had the urge to go and take the CD back. Kyle had only been single for four months and he loved Micheal, he really did. Conrad resisted the urge though, as he knew that if he didn't give him it today, he probably never would. And what a better time than the day of love?
Conrad pressed 'record' on his computer's webcam, and then on the song on youtube. Kyle had said he loved the song for a while now, and even if he hadn't it fit.
"Um, hi Kyle," Conrad said awkwardly. "I wanted to say this to you in this format, because if I told you in person I know I'd freeze up and say something stupid and it would be really awkward. I just wanted to say that I... love you. I've loved you for quite some time now and never had the guts to tell you. Man, I depend on you. I would probably be completely mute without you. You are my hero. I want to spend the rest of my life- or at least a week- saying that I'm yours. Damn, I don't know what to say now. Just, talk to me the day after school I don't want to tear up."
Conrad stopped recording and sighed.
The next day Conrad showed up at school with a queasy feeling in his stomach. He knew Kyle must have seen the CD, and was unsure of what Kyle would say. He acknowledged that it was hole he had dug himself but was uneasy all the time.
When standing outside his first period class Conrad waited for the teacher to open the lab door. Suddenly he felt hands hugging him from behind. A head rested on his shoulder.
"I love you too bud," Kyle said softly into his ear.
Conrad couldn't bear his friend like this. He chocked up some words. "No, it's not. Being bi isn't wrong. It's who you are, no one can change that."
"But Ashley said..."
"Screw Ashley! Who cares if she's a homophobe? You are who you are and if she doesn't like it, forget about her. You were always bi. Man, I remember you looking through your parent's records and thinking David Bowie was cute when you were little! You shouldn't hide who you are because of your old babysitter!" Conrad said, becoming more confident.
"But she said that God hates homos..."
"No, He doesn't. God loves His children and you are no exception. Ashley shouldn't matter anyways. Your fourteen and don't need a babysitter. She's just a neighbor now, man. You shouldn't constantly purge because she doesn't like one small part of you."
Kyle swallowed. "But I have to be perfect. Perfect is normal. If I feel I can't sustain perfection I stick my finger down my throat. I don't know... it makes me feel good to know I can control that. It takes the pressure off."
"Well, it's not healthy, and no one is perfect. Ashley isn't even perfect." Conrad leaned in, putting his hand in Kyle. "She smells like cigarettes and wine, threw up on the street, and told two ten year old girls who were selling cookies to fuck themselves. She is not the example of perfection. She's a chain-smoking women stuck in a mid-life crisis who uses cheep beer who knows that God will be the only man in her life."
A teary-face Kyle put his head on his good friends shoulders, crying.
"I need help."
Conrad snapped the lock on his locker, his cellphone in his hoodie pocket. The cellphone was an important thing. As he hadn't said a word in public for four years because of his selective mutism, his teachers permitted him to text responses to them, so he knew the teachers cell numbers. On one occasion he had accidentally sent a particularly damning text to a teacher, resulting in detention. However, if he was texting when the teachers were talking he would be told to put it away as if it wasn't his means of communication in the public world. A fair deal.
Conrad had something in the back jeans pocket. It was a little gift for someone, as it was Valentines Day. The day of love, joy, and peace.
"Hello Conrad," Mrs. Jacobs, said, shaking his hand as he entered the house. "It's nice that you found the time to join us for dinner."
"I've been joining you guys ever since Kyle and I became friends, and I'm not going to stop. It's not like my parent's are going to do anything for Christmas," Conrad said, grinning. "Where is Kyle?"
"He's walking Michael to the house. Speak of the devil!"
Conrad turned and saw a young man holding hands with Kyle. The two looked like complete opposites- Kyle being a tall young man with straight black hair while Michael was of a more modest height with red hair- but they were perfect together. Conrad knew it, but hated the fact.
The three teenagers sat together on the sofa after saying 'hi' to Kyle's relatives who they had to go through to get to the sofa. They talked, Michael resting his head on Kyle's lap with his head and Kyle playing with his hair.
"I don't even remember who half these people are!" Kyle said laughing. However he knew a woman who came up to him.
"Hello Kyle, Conrad."
"Hello Ashley," Kyle said, startled. Conrad gave a nod of recognition.
Who is your... um, friend," Ashley said stiffly, noticing that Michael had his head on Kyle and Kyle was playing with his hair lovingly.
Conrad looked at Kyle in his face and saw worry. Kyle swallowed, and somehow that made him summon a little courage.
"He's my boyfriend, Michael," Kyle said, his eyes wet. Conrad glared as Ashley, knowing the verses she was going to recite
In the confusion of the hallway Conrad pasted the package on the locker. In it was a CD he had made the other day. He hope his good friend Kyle would accept it, or not turn him down in bad terms.
As Conrad walked away he had the urge to go and take the CD back. Kyle had only been single for four months and he loved Micheal, he really did. Conrad resisted the urge though, as he knew that if he didn't give him it today, he probably never would. And what a better time than the day of love?
Conrad pressed 'record' on his computer's webcam, and then on the song on youtube. Kyle had said he loved the song for a while now, and even if he hadn't it fit.
"Um, hi Kyle," Conrad said awkwardly. "I wanted to say this to you in this format, because if I told you in person I know I'd freeze up and say something stupid and it would be really awkward. I just wanted to say that I... love you. I've loved you for quite some time now and never had the guts to tell you. Man, I depend on you. I would probably be completely mute without you. You are my hero. I want to spend the rest of my life- or at least a week- saying that I'm yours. Damn, I don't know what to say now. Just, talk to me the day after school I don't want to tear up."
Conrad stopped recording and sighed.
The next day Conrad showed up at school with a queasy feeling in his stomach. He knew Kyle must have seen the CD, and was unsure of what Kyle would say. He acknowledged that it was hole he had dug himself but was uneasy all the time.
When standing outside his first period class Conrad waited for the teacher to open the lab door. Suddenly he felt hands hugging him from behind. A head rested on his shoulder.
"I love you too bud," Kyle said softly into his ear.