Misplaced

Well…I suppose a short introduction is in order. Welcome to my diary. I spend hours bending over this, scribbling my story. Because my life is like a story. It seems so unreal…yet unfortunately it is. What are you thinking now? Are you curious or just bored…I don’t know. What is it that you’re looking for? All I can give you is a story. So let the story commence. My name is Katheryn Natasha Daniels but almost everyone knows me as Kat. I'm seventeen years old and I live in a small grotty flat in England. I have short, dark brown hair and blue-grey eyes. You don’t really need to know much about me but I guess it would be nice to know roughly who I am. That’s really as much as there is. I have a best friend. Her name is Jasmine, but like me her name has been shortened to Jaz. Jaz is without a doubt my closest friend, but that’s not really much. No-one is that close to me. Looking back on how it first started, I can quite safely say that if I hadn’t let myself be led astray by Jaz, it would never have happened. But I can’t blame her. She had no idea of the consequences whereas I did. But here it is. My story. My life.

“I can’t believe I let you talk me into this Jaz!” I said in frustration as she led me around the back of a building.
“Oh come on Kat! Where’s your sense of adventure?” Jaz grinned evilly at me. Rolling my eyes, I allowed myself to be pulled through a door. Music was blaring loudly and we were surrounded by people partying and getting drunk. Jaz was my best friend but she had a life that just wasn’t suited to me. She pulled away and headed off into the crowd, leaving me to try and follow her.
“Hey Jaz! Wait!” I called as I pushed past a group of people. I felt the usual sickness start clouding my brain again. Oh no. Not now. I knew I was shaking badly as the world around me started spinning. Stopping, I took a deep steadying breath and looked around. Spotting a bar, I headed towards it and sank on to one of the stools gratefully. I knew I shouldn’t have come here. Associating with normal humans at this time just wasn’t done. Even being with Jaz at this period was frowned upon because she wasn’t like us. But no-one was like me. Not even them. I don’t think anyone else could ever understand how powerful the longing inside of me is.

I suppose you’re wondering exactly what I am. Well it’s actually quite hard to explain. Have you ever heard of being possessed? I think that’s the easiest way to put it. I'm possessed by something. I have been my whole life. So have you. You know when you feel like you really need something but you don’t know what it is? That’s the thing inside of you. Your soul. Your soul is a part of you from the moment you’re born. To be born without one is just unthinkable. For most people, you will never even know that your soul truly exists. It will never show itself, never do anything that will give you reason to believe its there. Nothing. Your soul is the only part of you that’s left when you die. Your body will either rot in a coffin or be cremated. When you die, your soul leaves your body and moves on to what you believe the afterlife is. It’s not controlled by any kind of god, it’s your choice. Even if you feel that you don’t know what happens to you when you die, your soul knows. For those people who believe there is a god watching over them, they’re right. But their god only helps those who believe in him. Any belief that anyone has is right, as long as they believe entirely in it. So your soul will leave your body and go to the ‘afterlife’. But sometimes your soul doesn’t want to go. It stays on Earth. But souls can’t survive for long without a body. They need a body to reside in. But as I said earlier, all living creatures are born with a soul. When a soul joins a body that already has a soul and the two souls manage to live together inside one creature, it is known as a split personality. There really are two people inside of one body. But that rarely happens. So say a soul of someone didn’t want to move on the afterlife and wanted to live again, it would have to find a new body. New born babies don’t have especially strong souls. Your soul reflects you. If that soul who stayed on Earth found a new born baby, it would destroy the true soul of the child and then take its place. And that’s what happened to me. Your soul is just like an exact replica of you. For normal people there’s never any disturbance with their soul and they don’t even know it exists. But when someone else’s soul is inside of you it causes problems. There’s a clash of personalities. Your soul will be used to living the life of its originator and won’t like a lot of the choices you make. Sometimes your soul will break loose and do something you would never do but the originator would. Say you had the soul of a drug addict, you would seem to drift off into another world for what seemed like a brief amount of time but when you snapped back, you would be smoking some cannabis or injecting yourself with heroin. It’s pretty scary stuff. Now you definitely think I'm crazy don’t you? Well I'm not. Or at least, if I am, there are other people who believe the same as me.

The blood lust inside of me was growing and I couldn’t stop it. I never should have come here. I can’t stop it happening. Clutching at my head, I staggered away from the bar and towards the exit. I almost reached it when someone fell into me, knocking me to the floor. For a second I lay there, vaguely aware of the man apologising and a throbbing pain in the arm I had landed on but the next I seemed to be watching the scene outside of my body through a light mist. I saw the guy who had knocked me over trying to pull my body up but he quickly withdrew his arm in pain as I lashed out. I screamed as the blood started to gush from the man. Looking at my body, I saw instead a woman. Her skin was a dirty, dark cream colour, stretched inhumanly tight over her bones and the grey rags of the dress she was wearing barely covered her. She had blonde, greasy hair that hung over her face and her eyes were black. Not just the pupils and the iris around it…but her whole eye. They say that eyes are a window to your soul…I can see why. The man was yelling in pain as long, claw like fingers tore open his skin. Other people were pulling her away from him, shouting and swearing. Everything was a flood of noise as screams, shouts and my own terrible sobs became one. But they couldn’t see what I saw. They could only see my body. It was my fingers that they saw tearing at the man. I heard Jaz’s voice, the one distinguishable sound as I fell to the floor and beat my fists upon it in despair. I let out one last shuddering scream that seemed to shake the very earth itself as a diving sensation filled my body. I felt myself thud against the floor and could only lie there in paralysing fear as the darkness inside overcame me.