Like a Crash the Whole Thing Spun Out of Control

“You can’t wear that.”

“Why not?! It’s a lovely shirt!”

“Because you have sunburn, and the shirt is bright pink,” Caillen slapped his hand against his face in exasperation. “Seriously, what the fuck kinda girl are you Harlow Bennett?”

“A not very stylish one…?” He rolled his eyes and glanced around at the other racks. He stood still for a moment, staring at a dress before he walked over and yanked it off its hanger.

“This,” he said. “This is cute, and will show off some leg and what not. Go try it on.”I gave Caillen a look that clearly told him to ‘drop dead when I noticed just how short the dress was. “Come on! It’ll make you look hot!”

“It looks more like a belt to me Caillen…” He rolled his eyes and thrust the dress at me. “I am not wearing this Caillen; I’ll look like a tramp!”

“Honey, you always look like a tramp.” He winked at me when my jaw dropped. Caillen was the worst person to care about peoples feelings. “Fuck! Try it on, okay?” I sighed and stomped into the nearest change room.

I was right; the dress did look like a belt. I’d be lucky if no one caught a glimpse of my lady parts. I’d be even luckier of John, Garrett and Simon let me leave the bus in it. Caillen however, insisted I buy it and wouldn’t let me leave with out it. In the end I gave in and bought it, secretly buying a nicer, longer dress at the same time.



When we got back to the venue we found Angus sitting in the small baby pool with his legs dangling over the edge, a ham and salad sandwich in one hand, and a beer in the other. He looked up at us as were walked up and grinned.

“Hey guys, sup?”

“Harlow bought the cutest dress and it-“

“Alright, alright!” Angus exclaimed, throwing his hands up to stop Caillen from talking. “Sorry I asked.” Caillen scowled at him, stuck his nose up in the air and marched onto the bus. “What the fuck’s wrong with him?”

“You seriously have no idea how horrible my morning’s been with him!” I sighed, falling into one of the deck chairs and letting the bags fall from my fingers, down to the grass. “He made me buy this revolting dress that looks like a fucking belt!” I leant down and pulled the dress from a bag to show Angus. He raised his eyebrows.

“The fuck?”

“Exactly! It’s like he’s trying to whore me out!”

“You aren’t wearing that out tonight Har.” I gave him a look.

“Ya think?”

“I don’t understand him anymore,” Angus sighed, splashing some water onto his face. “He’s so fucking moody all the time, and it’s killing the Warped vibe, ya know?” I nodded. Caillen had been killing my Warped vibe too.

“Do you think something happened with Dylan?” I asked. Angus frowned.

“I thought it was Joshua?” We both frowned then, each of us trying to think of Caillen’s boyfriends name off the top of our heads. “Seriously, what the actual fuck? How many boyfriends has he had? Cause now I’m thinking Andrew…”

“I think it’s Andrew… I think… Maybe… No, it’s Carter!”

“That’s the one!” He exclaimed. We exchanged a high five then I stuffed the dress back in its bag and went inside the bus.

Trent was laying on the lounge in the front lounge talking to Zack and Alex from All Time Low, while they sat on the couch opposite him.

“Afternoon.”

“Hey Harlow,” they replied. I went past them to where I could drop my things into the junk bunk.

Garrett Nickelsen:
Come hangout?

“Have you guys seen Caillen?” I asked, ignoring Garrett’s text and going back out to where the guys were. Zack and Alex shrugged while Trent rolled his eyes. “What?”

“He’s in the back lounge giving birth to a huge baby called ‘I’m a gay mother fucking asshole called Caillen who sucks the fun Warped vibe from everyone including different bands’.” I stared at him for a moment before nodding my head slowly.

“I’m going to have a talk with him,” I sighed. “Maybe its girl stuff?” Alex and Zack gave me weird looks.

“She means boy-talk,” Trent laughed.

“Oh,” they nodded.

Caillen was lying on the couch with his huge grey teddy bear with a box of chocolates and a box of tissues while he was watching The Notebook. He looked up as I entered and frowned.

“You okay?” I asked.

“Carter broke up with me,” he sniffled, picking up another chocolate and stuffing it into his mouth. “He said I’m gone too much for his liking and that he can’t think about the things that I do when I’m away on tour. He thinks I cheat on him.”

“Well, you know that you don’t,” I told him, sitting down beside him and putting my hand on his knee. “Maybe you should bring Carter out on tour for like a week so he can see you don’t have time to cheat.”

“Maybe,” he sniffled again. “But I don’t think I want to if he’s going to assume things like that.”

“Then why are you crying?” I asked. “If you don’t care?”

“Because I loved him you fucking imbecile!” He screamed, throwing his teddy bear at me. “You wouldn’t fucking understand because you don’t know love Harlow! So fuck off and leave me alone!” I stood up, staring at him with my mouth gaping open.

“Cail-“

“Fuck off!”

And then Angus was there, glaring down at Caillen as he continuously dripped water from the pool onto the carpet.

“What the fuck is your problem Caillen?” He yelled. “Harlow is trying to be here for you, and you’re treating her like fucking shit? Oh, my fucking god, you’re boyfriend doesn’t trust you? So fucking what! You knew what it’d be like being in a touring band when you joined, so don’t fucking act like it’s ruining your life because it’s not, it’s making you be someone!” Caillen stared at Angus angrily before throwing his chocolates.

“Get out!” He screamed.



I went to The Maine’s bus again with a bag packed. I didn’t want to be anywhere near Caillen until he apologised to me and because The Maine guys were like brothers to me, I went and stayed there.

“What are you doing here?” Kennedy asked when he opened the door.

“Caillen just chucked the biggest hissy-bitch fit I have ever seen before,” I replied. “So I’ve come to seek refuge! Please say I can stay!”

“Course you can!” John smiled brightly, come out from the bunk area. He grabbed my nag from my hands and tossed it onto the couch.

“Hey Harlow!” Pat smiled when he came out from the back lounge with an empty Gatorade bottle in his hands. I grinned at him.

“Hey Pat! I was thinking of you earlier,” I said seriously. He cracked a smile and slapped his knee.

“You’re seriously killing me Harlow!” John and Kennedy gave us curious stares but I shook my head at Pat when he went to fill them in. “Nothing,” he laughed. “Garrett’s been looking for you by the way, said he wants to take you to get lunch for a catch up?”

“Oh, really?” I asked, biting my finger nail. “I’m not really hungry. I had a big lunch.”John reached forward and swatted my hand away from my mouth with a glare. “What’s up with you?”

“You tell me off for biting my nails, so you can’t bite yours.” I rolled my eyes and went in search of Garrett. He was lying in his bunk, playing on his computer.

“Hey Garrett.”

“Hey, you didn’t text me back earlier.”I rolled my eyes and pushed him over so I could crawl in beside him. “Wanna watch a movie until we have to get ready?” He asked. I nodded and pulled the curtain closed. “What movie? I have scary ones and funny ones.”

“I dunno Garrett, you choose.”



It was six o’clock and time for everyone to start getting ready to go out. Alex, Angus and Trent had selected the bar we were going to for dinner and then we would have a couple of drinks at the same one after. I didn’t really trust their choices most of the time, but when alcohol was concerned, it would be a good one.

The dress Caillen had made me buy was still back on my bus, so I was using that as an excuse to Caillen when he would ask me why I was wearing an actual dress. So I grabbed the mid thigh length, black over the shoulder dress from my bag, along with matching underwear and ventured through the bus to the back lounge where Kennedy and Jared were sitting watching TV.

“Hey guys, mind if I kick you both out for a minute while I get dressed?”Jared stood up, and then kicked Kennedy because he hadn’t listened.

“Sure thing dude, tell us when you’re done.” I patted Jared’s shoulder in thanks as he left the room behind Kennedy.

Once the door was securely shut behind them, I hesitantly took off my clothes and yanked on my new underwear and the dress as fast as I could in case someone decided to burst in while I was naked.

“Kenny, Jared, you guys can come back in now!”

They came back dressed and ready with Pat and Tim, and all sat back down on the couch to continue watching what they had been watching before. Jared gave me a smile as he took his seat before turning his attention back to the TV. My shoes were in my bag on the lounge in the front so I went and got them, and slid them onto my feet.

I could hear Garrett talking to John just outside the door about their music and about how hot it would be performing on stage the next day. John was agreeing and adding small noises of agreement when I bounded down the steps as fast as I could in my heels.

“Whoa,” Garrett exclaimed when I tripped and fell into him. “Harlow, what the fuck are you doing?”

“Sorry Gare, I tripped.” John and Garrett looked down at my feet and rolled their eyes and Garrett helped me stand up and steady myself.

“Of course you did, what the hell kind of shoes are they?” I glanced down at my heels and shrugged.

“Heels.” John chuckled and I turned to him and nudged him with my elbow. “They only look big to you two boof-heads because you guys have never worn heels before.” Garrett rolled his eyes.

“And I never will.” I gave him an evil look. “The fuck are you looking at?”

“Wait til you’re drunk Gare, I’ll get you wearing them by the time we come back to the bus tonight.” Garrett scowled at me while John laughed. “We’ll call you Garretta.” John doubled over laughing while Garrett swatted at me.

By the time Pat, Jared, Kennedy and Tim had come out of the bus, the guys from All Time Low had arrived and I could see the guys from my band walking over, Caillen bringing up the rear with a sour look on his face.

Together, the sixteen of us walked across the venue, through little parties other bands were having to where there were two vans with eight seats in each waiting for us by the gates. I went with the guys from The Maine and Simon, while the rest of the guys from my band went with All Time Low in the other.

Tim, who was driving our van followed the other one seeing as no one on this bus knew where we were going, Trent, Angus and Alex were the ones who organised it, so obviously they were the only ones who knew where we were going. In the end, the restaurant they had chosen was a nice one a couple of blocks away from the venue.

Tim parked the van beside the other one and immediately, Garrett and Pat got out and hurried inside because they both needed to go to the bathroom really badly. Tim quickly locked the doors and John motioned for me to follow him, Jared, Tim and Kennedy inside. Simon was staying behind to what for the others. The guys from the other bus were still half in their van while Alex and Jack were joking around about something and the rest of the guys were laughing.

“Reservation for Gaskarth, River or Lyons,” Tim said as he stepped up to the counter. The girl nodded and looked through her list before looking back up and smiling.

“Right this way. Are you waiting on anyone else?” She asked.

“Yeah, we are. There are two guys in the bathroom, and nine guys still out in the parking lot,” Tim told her. She nodded and gestured for us to follow her after she grabbed 16 menus from a pile on her desk.

She took us right through the restaurant to the other side of the room where there was an awfully long table.

“We get a lot of bands coming through here around the Warped Tour time,” she told Tim. Tim laughed and told her that he expected as much.

I sat down beside John at the table, and Jared by him. They both ordered a beer while I ordered a non-alcoholic lemon, lime and bitters. They teased me about my girly drink for a moment before I reminded them both that I was in fact a girl. Then they both shut up and started talking to the others as they slowly arrived at the table.



“I swear to god Matt if you don’t shut the fuck up, I’m going to fucking kill you!” Jack yelled down the table while Alex flicked a meatball at Matt. They were silent for a second before erupting into laughter.

“Alex, dude, flick me a meatball!” Angus held his hand up. Alex laughed and grabbed another meatball on his fork and flicked it across the table at Angus’ awaiting hand. “Thanks bro!”

“Guys,” Simon stressed out with a sigh. “We can’t throw food in a restaurant.” Even I knew he shouldn’t have said that, because not a second after his mouth finished moving, another meatball, three forkfuls of pasta, a splosh of mashed potato and a chewed up piece of steak flew across the table and hit him in the face.

“Gross,” I muttered, stabbing a green bean with my fork and raising it to my mouth. Zack, who was next to me laughed.

“You gonna eat that last bit of steak?” A voice asked. I rolled my eyes at Jack who was watching my plate eagerly and moved my plate across the table, who stabbed his fork through the remaining bit of my dinner and took it to his mouth.

Garrett Nickelsen:
Fucking boring. Let’s go to the bar.

I nodded down the table at Garrett and stood up at the same time he did. All eyes were then on us, Jack wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. I scoffed and threw my napkin at him.

“We’re going to the bar,” Garrett told everyone.

“I’m coming to,” Alex stood up.

“I think we’re all finished,” Matt said standing up. “Lead the way to the bar Alex.” Alex stuck his finger up at Matt, but bounded away towards the bar anyway, Jack not far behind him.



Like I had predicted earlier, by the time we were heading back to the venue, I had Garrett walking in my heels. Although, he had to have Jared and Kennedy walk along beside him so he didn’t trip over or break the heels off.

“Do I look fucking pretty?” He yelled out. John, who was walking in front of him with Tim turned around and opened his arms wide.

“Garrett, you’re the prettiest lady I ever saw!” He exclaimed. “Come give me some sugar, sweet cheeks!” Garrett laughed and flung himself into John’s arms.

“Johno, I never thought you liked me that way?” Jared and Kennedy started to double over laughing.

“Garrett I swear to god if you break my shoes, I’ll break your fucking face!” Garrett shrugged and kicked off my shoes after pushing John away roughly. I watched in horror as they scuffed along the pavement. “Oh, my god. They’re gonna scratch! I’m going to kill you!” He seemed to take the look on my face seriously because he started running. “John, get my shoes!” I yelled over my shoulder, running after Garrett.

“I’m sorry!”

“I don’t fucking care! You will buy me a new pair of those exact shoes you asshole!” Garrett laughed as he rushed through the same party we’d gone through earlier. “They were twelve hundred dollars!” People looked at us like we were crazy.

“Who the fuck pays that much for shoes?”

“They were a gift!” Garrett jumped over someone’s esky and rounded a corner. “Garrett Nickelsen you assbutt, come back here!”Suddenly there was a thud and I rounded the corner to find Garrett on the floor laughing.

“Did you just call me a fucking assbutt?” He laughed. Nodding, I jumped on him. “Get off me you… You rapist!” He laughed, pushing at me. “Stop it!” He whined when I tickled him. If it was one thing that Garrett Nickelsen hated, it was being tickled.

“No, buy me a new pair of shoes!”

“Okay, okay, get off me!”

After laughing a little longer, we got up and wandered through the venue towards The Maine’s bus where the other guys were all standing. Jack and Alex started making obscene movements with their hips.

“John, do you have my shoes?” He laughed and held up his left hand, where my shoes were dangling off the ends of his fingers. “Good. Okay, I’m going to crash. Goodnight guys! See you boys tomorrow,” I told Trent and Angus, completely ignoring Caillen. They nodded and I left them as I walked onto the bus.

“Sharing a bunk with John again?” Pat questioned. I shrugged.

“I guess so.” He nodded. “Night Pat.”

“Night Harlow.”

The last thing I remembered that night is of a warm body sliding into the bunk behind me. He didn’t smell of alcohol, so I knew he had showered. He exhaled slowly as he set his head down on the pillow behind mine.

“Night Harlow.”