Blessed With a Mess

Blessed With A Mess

I sighed, swigging from the bottle of Jack Daniels I had in front of me. It didn't take me long to come back to my senses after kissing James. I felt bad for leading him on. I felt bad for doing that to Ben. I felt bad for breathing the same air as both of them. Everything was so wrong.

How do I fix something like this? Drinking. I went to the closest bar and had drank myself into oblivion. For days. The bartender had stopped giving me shots a while ago and just gave me the bottle. Hell if I cared.

"Olive," a soft voice spoke behind me. "Olive look at me."

I turned towards Ben ,my stomach churning immediately upon doing so. "Go away," I mumbled.

"No, I'm tired of this," he sighed before sitting on the bar stool next to me. "Yeh've been ignoring me fo' days. I thought I did somefing wrong... that was until I talked to James."

My eyes widened and I nearly threw up. "Y-you talked to him?"

"Yeah," he mumbled. "I thought yeh were stayin' wiff him and turns out he thought jus' the opposite. We've been lookin' fo' yeh fo' hours."

"Here I am, I guess."

"Yeah here yeh are," I felt his eyes narrow on me and I turned away, taking another sip from the bottle.

"So, just say it."

Ben's brows furrowed. "Say what?"

"We're through with. Done. Finito. Whatever else you want to say. Curse at me, yell, spit in my face and all that jazz. I can handle it."

There was a long pause and my heart broke. Slowly I turned and faced Ben, looking into his eyes for the first time since he had arrived. "Why would I do that?" He asked.

"Because I deserve it."

"I came here to take yeh home, Olive. We all make mistakes."

"What? James and I kissed. How can you even forgive me?"

"Like I said, we all make mistakes. We're not perfect by far, but I love yeh, and yeh love me. Are yeh sorreh yeh kissed James?"

"I love him," I mumbled, "but of course I am. I'm not drinking for fun."

He chuckled, reaching out and taking the bottle out of my hand. "Let's go home."

"Just like that? We're forgetting about it?"

Ben sighed and ran his hands through his hair. "No offense, Olivia, but look at yeh. Yeh look a mess. I fink what yeh have been doin' to yehself has been punishment enough, no? I'm here to carry yeh home, figuratively."

I leaned over and pressed my lips to his. "I love you so fucking much, Ben. I know we're not perfect, but I'm trying."

"I'm trying too. Now let's head home, yeah?"

"Yeah," I grinned, sliding off the bar stool and enlacing my hand in Ben's.

This was one step towards the future.