Just Like Heaven

"I believe that Noah has suffered some type of trauma at the Broca's area of his brain. Causing Mutus; or muteness."

I stared at Dr. Wormer with a slack jaw, "Noah's mute?"

He nodded, "I'm 90% sure, Ms. Haley."

I exhaled, looking down at Noah, who played with his shirt, "Will he ever be able to form words?"

"Possibly, but we won't anything for sure until we run some test."

I felt my heart ache at the thought of Noah not being able to talk. I hadn't ever thought it would be something like this. I mean, he's a baby, you don't ever expect your baby to not be able to speak.

"In the mean time, I wouldn't stress it, just take care of Noah like you have been doing and I'll get back to you." Dr. Wormer smiled at me.

"Thank you." 

I followed the nurse to the lab to draw blood from Noah. Noah whimpered just a little when he got pricked. I cradled him close, after, and took him home.

I wasn't so worried, because I had gotten some type of information on why Noah didn't coo. I felt a lot better, but I still had some fearfulness about what the test would show. I hoped that it wasn't anything else serious.

I called Mikey when I got home; I put Noah down for a nap. I paced around the living room, with the phone to my ear, and chewed at my lip.

Mikey finally answered; "Hey, babe, what's up? Everything good with Noah?" 

"Uh, there going to run some test on him. Besides that, he's perfectly fine."

"Test for what?" Mikey sounded concerned.

I coursed my hair, "Dr. Wormer thinks Noah may be mute."

Mikey was silent, then he sighed, "Mute? Will...will he ever talk?"

"He said that he'll have a proper diagnosis when they get the test results back."

"How did this happen?"

"It could have been something with his brain." I told Mikey; tears started to swell, "I feel like I did something wrong."

"Morgan, you didn't do anything," Mikey started heavily, "These things happen, baby."

"I don't want Noah to have any problems while he's growing up," I sobbed, "I want him to be happy."

"He will be happy, M."

"I just keep thinking of the what ifs, you know what I mean? I don't want him to struggle in school or making friends." I sobbed harder, "I must've done something wrong."

"Morgan, babe, calm down, please. I'll be home in a little while and we can talk, alright? Don't beat yourself up, you didn't do anything."

Mikey's words helped me feel better. I took them to heart and let them comfort me.

"Okay." I murmured.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

I hung up with Mikey, then I set my phone down. My breathing had become even, and the tears dried. I decided to look up more information on muteness.


Mikey came home around the time Noah woke up. Noah sat on his plush blanket, playing with his light up Mickey Mouse toy that made funny little bell noises. Noah loves anything that makes a noise.

Mikey came in, "Noah, baby boy!"

Noah looked up and clapped, out stretching his hands after. Mikey picked him up, "I missed you." Mikey kissed his cheek, "Hey, M. What're you doin'?"

"Hi," He sat beside me and kissed me, "I've been looking up information on muteness."

Mikey's smiled turned down a bit, "What did you find out?"

"It's just like deafness." I answered, "But it can be cured with exercises. Noah may not learn to talk, though," I sighed, "He can learn sign language to communicate."

"Is that what you want to do?" Mikey asked, Noah settled in Mikey's lap, playing with his toy.

"If there isn't any other choice." I told him.

"I think that would be good either way, y'know? It'll be a good thing for him to know sign language."

"Yeah," I felt myself sighing again, "I'm hoping that sign language will be just a bonus, that he'll be able to talk."

"Me, too." Mikey put his arm around me, placing me closer to him, "Do you still feel responsible?"

"How could I not?" I muttered, "I mean, I birthed him, I should have done something to prevent this."

"Morgan, no one could have known. These things happen."

"It's all my fault." I whispered with a shake of my head.

"No it isn't. It's no one's fault."

I buried my head in Mikey's chest, hiding my tears away. I sniffled, feeling a pudgy little hand on my cheek. I looked up and saw Noah looking at me with wonder.

"I love you to pieces, baby boy." I said to him, I kissed his little hand.

I pulled him, gently, onto my lap and showered his baby face in kisses. He smiled widely at me, trying to kiss me back. I love this little boy with my whole heart. 


Piggy settled herself at the foot of our bed, while Mikey and I climbed in. Noah still slept in the crib in our bedroom; I didn't want him to be in his bedroom all alone. I had kissed his cheek and got in bed with Mikey.

"You alright now, babe?" Mikey asked, pulling me into his arms.

"Yes." I answered softly, "I'm not so worried."

"Noah will be fine. We'll do whatever we can to help him."

"I know."

He kissed my forehead, "Have you thought about the wedding yet?"

"Not really." I told him, "I don't really care about a huge wedding, Mikes. Anything is fine."

"I just want to do right by you." He said softly.

"And you have. You're here, you're taking care of me and Noah. We're all right."

"So what do you want to do?"

"Something small, a little white dress." I chuckled.

"That sounds like a plan."

"We can do it in July, on Independence day."

He nodded, pressing his lips to my shoulder, "I can do that."

"Sounds good?"

"Sounds great." He said with a small chuckle, "Can you imagine Noah in a little suit?"

I giggled myself, "He'll look so damn cute."

"July 4th it is. Where?"

"Wherever you want." 

"Hmm," he hummed softly, "We can do it in that small church a few blocks from here."

"Yeah, okay." I agreed, "I can't wait."

"Less than two months from now, M." Mikey said happily, "I can't wait, either."