Some Secrets Are Meant To Be Told

My hands subconsciously pulled my sleeves down farther. There was no need for someone to see the hand-shaped bruises that decorated my arms.
“Elizabeth? Could you continue reading?” Mr. Mellema’s snide voice interrupted my thoughts.
“I’m sorry, sir, I must have drifted off. Could you please show me where we are?” My voice was just above a whisper, but the girl in front of me (Wasn’t her name Sydney?) clearly heard me and turned around to show me where we were in Beowulf. I mouthed a thank you to her, and started reading. I began, letting my voice rise and fall with the ancient beat of the epic poem. Each line gave me strength to carry on to the next. Until, of course, the last bell of the day interrupted me. My fellow freshmen that sat around me jumped; I think it was because they were as engrossed into reading as I was. I slowly packed away my book, mentally marking the page we were on.
“Nice reading there, Johnson.” The infamous school pothead, Dom, was behind me. He was a good person, though he was nicer when he was high.
“Thanks, dom. How was your day?” I slung my bag over my shoulder, internally groaning as it rested on top of a bruise.
“It was good. Gonna be better. I’m going to hang out with Syd and the usual crowd. You and Roman want to join?”
“Thanks, but Roman got grounded, and I promised Will that I would play soccer with him after school. Maybe tomorrow? I’ll bring Roman.” Dom smiled and agreed, giving me a side-hug as we walked through the door. Thankfully, I had abided my time and the hallways were almost empty. Trying to remember where I was going to meet Will, so I wandered around until I ended up in the commons. I found Will there, wearing his signature beanie over his bright red hair. He was reading- I think it was Julius Caesar. When he saw me, he closed his book and smiled one of those heart-stopping smiles before standing up.
“Hey, you okay?” He asked when I approached him.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired, I guess. Ready to get my ass kicked by you at soccer, though,” I replied with a smile, “Just let me drop off my bag and grab the ball.” He nodded his assent and we walked through the front doors towards the Junior High. My mother was the principle there. It was quiet.
“So,” Will’s voice broke the silence, “Roman missed you before he had to get on the bus. He was kind of pissed. You blew him off at lunch, too. Why are you avoiding your boyfriend? Is everything okay between you two?”
“Everything’s fine.” Will turned to me and gave me a disbelieving look.
“What?”
“Well, I’m not sure if I believe you. In fact, I’m sure that I don’t. Why can’t you trust me? ” His voice gave away the hurt he felt. To quote our favorite movie (A Few Good Men) I said in reply,
“Because you can’t handle the truth.” He had stopped in front of the steps that led into the Junior High. Turning towards him, I snapped,
“Will, don’t worry about it okay? I can’t tell you. I’ll tell you when I’m ready- I promise. I’ll be right back.” His hand reached out as if to touch me, but at the last moment, he dropped it. I saw a small nod from him, and headed up the stairs. My mother was in her office. More often than not, I felt like she loved her students more than she loved me. For almost three years, we were strangers. We exchanged pleasantries, but most of the time, I was just a shadow on a cloudy day.
“Hey Lizzy, how was your day?” My mom smiled at me.
“It was fine, Mom. I’m going to play soccer with Will. When do you want me back?”
“Before it gets dark. But it’ll be a late night tonight, so be ready to work on your homework.”
“’Kay, ma. Bye. Love you.”
“Love you too. Be safe.”
I grabbed the red and white soccer ball from under her desk, and left. I walked through the front doors of the school. I immediately found Will and went down the stairs. He was talking to some eighth graders that we knew, but stopped when I approached.
“Hey, I got the ball. You ready to go?”
“Sure. I’ll meet you there. I have to pick up my little sister and drop her off. Do you want to come?” He asked hesitantly, but I smiled.
“Of course I do!”
“Great,” He smiled back, “Let’s go.” He offered me his arm like them gentlemen from Pride and Prejudice. My smile grew wider.
“Will you take my arm, milady?” He asked in a very fake British accent. I curtsied and replied,
“Of course, my dear. Shall we skip?”
“Indeed we shall.” And so we did.
We stopped in front of the elementary school breathless. Will check his cell phone- it was ten minutes until three. The school would be getting out soon. I wrapped my arms around his waist and rested my head on his chest. His arms instantly enveloped me. I closed my eyes as his scent wafted over me. His heartbeat filled my head, more calming than anything I’ve ever experienced before.
“Hey,” he said, “I’m sorry I pried too much. I shouldn’t have. Forgive me? Please?” I pulled myself closer to him, trying to mold my body to his. I nodded. His hands rubbed my arms and my back, and came to rest on my shoulders. Gently, he pushed me away. One of his hands cupped my cheek, and his thumb stroked my cheek. He looked intently into my eyes.
“You know I love you, right?” His voice was deep- thoughtful. His eyes smoldered, and I had to look away- did he actually love me? My heart was pounding so fast that I was going to pass out.
“Will…” My voice trailed off.
“Just come here.” He said, pulling me close, and then I could feel his lips press against my forehead. Fireworks went off in my head and my heart. I knew then that he was the kind of person that I wanted to be in a relationship with- the kind of person that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
The bell rang behind me, making both of us jump. Reluctantly, we let go of each other, but not for long. One of his arms of his arms went over my shoulders, drawing me towards him. Our hips connected. My right arm snaked behind his waist, my hand finding his far back pocket and going inside. I gave his ass a slight squeeze, earning exactly what I wanted- his smile. Leaning against him, I sighed. We waited.
“There she is.” He let go of me as she ran to him. His arms opened and she- quite literally- jumped into his arms. Will swung her around, making her laugh in delight.
“Hey, Cassie,” he said. Cassie responded with another exuberant hug. I stood by and watched the brother and sister together. Their mother had died of pancreatic cancer when Will was about eleven. Will had been taking care of her at his grandmother’s house (his grandmother stayed in bed almost all day). He loved Cassie more than anything in the world, and to her he was a superhero.
“Lizzy!” She squealed, wiggling out of Will’s arms and into mine. “I’ve missed you so much! Why haven’t you come over?” For a seven year old, she was pretty smart.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m here now, though.” I smiled. Cassie was exactly like the kind of daughter I wanted later in life- redheaded, with bright, blue eyes and a personality to mach her brother’s. She was one of the sweetest, kindest people I had ever met.
“Are you guys going to take me home?” She asked, and from my arms, not waiting for an answer. Will and I walked on either side of her, holding her hands and exchanging knowing glances when she started to tell us all about her day.
“Lizzy?”
“Yes, Cassie?”
“Do you love my bother? Are you going to marry him and live happily ever after like Cinderella?”
“Cassie,” Will scolded, “That was rude.” Cassie looked shamefaced and sad, but stared at me with hope in her eyes.
“Will, love,” I said, “How about you walk ahead?” Will nodded and did so, but out of hearing range.
“Sweetheart,” I began, kneeling down and suddenly grasping for words to explain, “You brother and I are just friends. I don’t know if he loves me. But I’ll you a secret, okay?” She nodded, enticed.
“I do love your brother, though I’m scared to tell him. I wish that I could marry him when we were older. Promise not to tell?” I held out my pinky finger, and saw her flash a dazzling smile. She hooked her pinky with mine.
“I pinky promise.” She said very solemnly. I gave her a hug, and nodded to Will, letting him know that it was okay to join us again.
“How are my two favorite girls doing?” He wrapped an arm around my waist and his sister’s shoulders, pulling us close to him. We started walking again, but mostly in a pronounced silence. It wasn’t long until Cassie pulled free form Will again and started running towards their house. We called out together,
“Be careful!” and watched her enter the white picket gate in front of their house. She waved at us when she was on the porch, and then disappeared into the yellow house. We walked towards the soccer field, our arms wrapped around each other. It was silent again, I was absorbed in my thoughts and he in his.