The True Lies of the Once Fabulous Killjoys

Feeling free with no child’s hand in hers, Lauren walked up the three front steps if the clinic porch and let herself in with the key. Dr. Lawrence hadn’t arrived yet, but she was early herself.

The white reception desk was organised as usual. With no messages flashing on the desk phone’s inbuilt answering machine Lauren had only the appointment files to set out before the clinic was due to open. She ordered them by appointment time and left them on the top level of her desk. As everything was done she decided to enjoy a steaming hot cup of coffee before the clinic officially opened. It was funny how quickly she had nothing to do when Ben wasn’t around.

Lauren was on her way back from the lunch room when Jeffrey Lawrence came striding into the clinic, shouting out his cheerful morning hello.

“Good morning Dr. Lawrence,” Lauren greeted, failing to return her greeting as cheerfully as he had.

He stood there, briefcase in hand and suit jacket draped over his arm. His smile was broad as he approached her.

“I found something on my way in this morning that I think you’ll like,” he said. When all he had received from her was a blank look he presented her with a CD case. “Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys. It’s by some rock band who used to see Killjoys all the time. I thought you’d like it.”

Of course Lauren already had the CD; the guys had given it to her after the album launch in San Francisco. In fact, she’d been in such a good mood when she left the house that morning that she’d had it on in the car as she drove to work. Although she loved the band, their music, the album itself, she couldn’t help but feel offended by her boss’s presumptuous gift. The Killjoy war was compiled with some of the most horrible experiences of her life, what would make him think that she’d want a reminder of that time?

She didn’t get the opportunity to voice those thoughts to him as he’d already headed into his office, clearly impressed with himself. Later, when he was busy with a patient, she had every intention of slipping the CD into his briefcase. Excluding the fact that she found his gift a real insult to her emotions, she didn’t want him thinking that it was okay to be buying her gifts of any kind – it would only encourage his feelings for her.

The day passed as it usually did. Patients came in, patients went out, patients complained about the cost of prescriptions, patients threw up on floor, patient’s children drew on the walls, and dear old Mr. Murray Sinclair came in startled and confused. But despite all the annoyances that came with the job as medical receptionist, Lauren breezed through the morning quite happily, because at lunch time Mikey would be bringing her little man in and they’d be going out for lunch.

How long had it been since she left the office for lunch? Lauren thought about this as 1 p.m. grew closer. It had to have been months. Usually she’d stay in with Ben as there was little money left over after bills and rent that they could rarely afford to go out, and the clinic was so peaceful at lunch time that there wasn’t much point leaving for a crowded cafe or park anyway. But today she was excited to be getting out of the office. It would be a treat for Ben and for herself, and possibly a chance to repair some of the damage between her and Mikey.

“I’m off,” Dr. Lawrence said. He had his briefcase in hand and was in the process of shrugging on his jacket. “You can listen to your new CD during your lunch break.”

Yeah, right, she thought, he obviously hasn’t realised that it’s back in his briefcase.

“Sure,” she lied back. “See you after lunch.”

“I’ll bring you back a coffee!” he shouted over his shoulder as he waltzed out the front door, not giving her the chance to decline.

Once she’d heard the sound of his expensive Ford Ranger pull out of the miniature car park, Lauren gathered up her purse, turned on the lunch time message on the answering machine, and quickly checked her make up in the bathroom mirror. By time she reached the waiting room again Mikey had just entered with Ben perched on his shoulders.

“Mummy! Look how tall I am!” Ben hollered excitedly.

“Wow! When did you get so tall? I’m sure you were just this tall,” she held her hand out to just below her waist, “when I left this morning.”

“Mummy,” he groaned, “I’m on Uncle Mikey’s shoulders!”

She feigned shock. “Well so you are!”

Mikey and Lauren exchanged a knowing look while Ben giggled cutely at his mother’s silliness.

“Are you ready to go?” Mikey asked.

“Sure am,” she replied with a smile. “I know a great little cafe in town.”

They took Mikey’s car to the cafe as Ben’s car seat was already inside, but Lauren drove. On the way Lauren pointed out the various buildings to Mikey, delved into details about the people who worked there, and explained how helpful they had all been when she first arrived in town.

“I wouldn’t call them friends,” she said just as they were pulling up near the cafe, “but they’re very close acquaintances.”

It was a short walk from the car to the cafe, and Ben became instantly energetic when he saw just where they were headed. They didn’t eat there very often, but Ben loved it because the waitresses always brought him crayons and a map to colour in.

Mikey ordered for them all: coffees for himself and Lauren, a chocolate milkshake for Ben, and three yummy salad sandwiches. They chose a booth to sit in and Ben got straight onto colouring in.

“I probably shouldn’t be having this,” Lauren gestured to the coffee that had just been placed down in front of her. Mikey looked at her quizzically. She explained. “Dr. Lawrence said he’d bring me back one after lunch. I didn’t tell him I was going out.”

Lauren didn’t notice Mikey twitch when she’d mentioned her boss’s name. He hadn’t heard much about the man, but it didn’t matter, any male buying coffee for Lauren was not on, unless it was him or a gay man.

“Don’t worry about the doctor,” Mikey replied, rather tensely, “just enjoy your lunch break.”

Mikey watched as Ben coloured. It was strange that he took such an interest in the activity, seeing as Lauren herself was the definition of art illiterate. Ben was colouring directly inside the lines – something most children struggle with until they hit the second grade – and was matching the colours together. The picture looked far better than it should have. He watched the way Ben gripped the crayon; his fingers were long, like musicians fingers. Gerard could draw, I, Mikey thought, could play bass... could it be possible? Could Ben be mine?

Mikey thought all throughout lunch about asking Lauren again if he was Ben’s father, but before he knew it Lauren was pulling back into the clinic parking lot and he’d missed his chance. It was probably for the best; he didn’t want to upset her by asking her difficult questions.

“Dr. Lawrence won’t be back for another fifteen minutes, so you could come in for a bit if you want...” Lauren announced as they exited the car, trailing off awkwardly at the end.

He smiled; they were getting comfortable with each other again. “Sounds good.”

He watched as Lauren casually plucked Ben from his car seat and put him on the ground. They walked into the clinic, their own little unit.

“So this is where you spend eight hours of your day,” Mikey stated as he watched Lauren settle behind the large reception desk.

“This is it – I know it’s not much, but I like it.”

“I know it’s none of my business, but what’s going on with you and the doctor?”

“Nothing!” Lauren thought she’d answered too fast for it to sound believable, so she explained with more calmness and clarity. “I’ve been told that he has a little thing for me, but he’s just my boss. I can barely imagine him out of white lab coat, let alone in my kitchen or...” she shuddered. “ Well, you get the picture.”

Mikey got the picture she was trying to portray, but his mind stayed fixated on what she had implied... Dr. Lawrence, her bedroom, then them sat across from each other at the kitchen table after a night of hot, sweaty sex. He refused to let that become a reality.

“Have dinner with me tonight,” he blurted out before his mind had actually processed what he was getting himself into.

Lauren looked at him regretfully. “Oh, um... look, lunch was great and everything, but I think it’d be best for us not to push the limits of this... thing just yet.”

“Come on, Lauren, it’s just two friends having dinner, don’t over analyse it.” He furthered his argument. “Gerard and the others won’t have a problem babysitting Ben, and you can relax for a bit without having to worry about him. Please?”

“Alright, you convinced me,” she replied, smiling her cute little smile that did funny things to Mikey’s stomach. “Give me some time after work to get dressed, and then we can go.”

They conversed about the details until Dr. Lawrence traipsed into the office, two Styrofoam cups of coffee in hand, a few minutes later. Upon noticing Mikey’s presence, he explained the complexities of Lauren’s work, the need for concentration, and then went on a tangent about security laws. Mikey zoned out for most of the doctor’s droning, but by the end of his spiel he’d gathered that it all translated to ‘fuck off’. And he did so, once he’d kissed Lauren’s cheek, that is – purely to piss the man off.



Lauren has made her way home faster than ever before that evening. She, for once, was out of the office at exactly three o’clock, and sat right on the speed limit the whole way home. She made a beeline for the bedroom, only stopping to embrace Benjamin.

It had been so long since she had gone out for dinner that she’d actually forgotten that she had so many nice dresses in her wardrobe. But then, would wearing a dress make Mikey think that she was trying to impress him? Well, she was – but he’s not meant to know that. Eventually she settled on a knee-length, sapphire, halter-neck, taffeta dress, accessorising it with a cubic zirconium pendant.

Hair and makeup took longer than anticipated; she was definitely needed to do herself up more often if she wanted to keep any skill in application. Mikey knocked on her door just as she finished applying a nude gloss to her lips, causing her to hop across the room to the door while trying to put her feet in her silver stilettos. She pulled the door open far too enthusiastically.

“Wow...” Mikey complimented as he took in her appearance. “I – you look – wow...”

She giggled and responded in a mock flirtatious tone, “Oh, you.”

Lauren walked down the hallway ahead of Mikey and entered the living room where four jaws simultaneously dropped. Gerard, Frank, Ray, and Bob hadn’t seen her so look as incredible as she did since the Killjoy Ball during the war.

“Lauren, I think you just turned me straight,” Frank said, then winked at her when Gerard gave him a stunned look.

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” she replied with a smile. She picked up her keys off the coffee table. “So, Ben bed time is seven-thirty and he needs to have a bath before then. We’ll be back late so don’t wait up.”

“Have fun!” the guys yelled after them. Of course they had every intention of waiting up for them.



Dinner with Mikey had went really well, Lauren felt. They started off a little awkwardly, but once their waiter had tripped on his untied shoelace, sending a pitcher of citrus water flying onto Mikey’s crotch, the laughter, jokes, and conversation began to flow. The pair talked for so long, completely oblivious to their surroundings, that the restaurant became empty and they were asked kindly by the owner to leave at closing time. They drove around Elmore aimlessly after that until Lauren realised how late it was, a side effect of motherhood.

Mikey pulled up out the front of the cottage. He hurried around the side of the car to open the door for Lauren. They walked up the gravel path to the front door where Lauren spent a few seconds trying to locate the keyhole in the dark.
“Thanks for a great night, Mikey,” Lauren said warmly, leaning it shyly to peck his cheek.

“It was my pleasure,” he smiled. “Thanks for not teasing me about my crotch smelling like lemon.”

“The teasing will begin tomorrow,” she promised. “I’m just going to check on Benjamin before I go
to bed. Thanks again.”

“I’ll come with you.”

They walked up the hallway to Benjamin’s room. Mikey opened the door for Lauren, but when he went to follow her into the room he came to an abrupt halt behind her. He was about to ask why she’d stopped when he noticed where her gaze was fixed. He gasped in shock.
Benjamin’s bed was empty with its covers ripped back, the lamp had been knocked off the side table and laid smashed on the carpet, and worst of all, the window that was always kept firmly shut and locked was now wide open. Benjamin was gone.