Should've Said No

Megan Mason thought Rian Dawson was the world's most perfect boy and had been since they met. It had happened two weeks into senior year when Megan was studying in the library listening to New Found Glory on her iPod. Rian walked by and noticed what she was listening to and the rest, as the say, was history.

Rian Dawson was the kind of boyfriend who brought Megan ice cream and her favorite movie when she was upset and soup and flowers when she wasn't feeling well.

Rian Dawson was the kind of boyfriend who gave Megan a promise ring (that matched the one he wore) after the first time they had sex. He said the rings were a symbol of how much he loved her and how he would love only her.

Rian Dawson was the kind of boyfriend who knew just when to send an "I miss you" text message. Or leave a cute "I love you and can't wait to see you," voicemail for Megan while she was in class and he was out on the road counting down to almost the exact second until they would see each other again.

Rian Dawson had a secret. Rian Dawson was an asshole. He wasn't an asshole in the sense that he blatantly was rude to people or made a hobby of treating his friends like shit.

Rian Dawson was an asshole in the sense that since the fall of 2007, when All Time Low went out on the road with Boys Like Girls for the Touzilla tour, Rian Dawson began to rack up a groupie list that would have made Alex Gaskarth blush. He would argue that it was never something he planned to do, but more like something that just fell into his lap.

It all started after their show in Orlando, the first week into the tour. Rian had drank a little too much and Courtney knew it. She watched him all night, fully aware that the silver band around his ring finger on his left hand wasn't just some ring he wore every day.

Courtney didn't know Megan personally, Courtney didn't even know Rian, but as soon as she spotted him across the bar, she knew by the end of the night she would get to know him pretty well.

Courtney played her cards exactly right as she approached Rian that night. She knew exactly what to say and exactly how to touch his arm to make him essentially turn to putty in her hands. And by 1:23 that morning, she was being invited back to Rian's hotel room, which just happened to be attached to the bar they were in.

Rian's friends barely noticed he'd been talking to a girl, who wasn't his girlfriend, and Rian's friend barely noticed that same girl sneaking from Rian's hotel room the following morning. Rian had the reputation of being the world's most perfect boy and the idea of Rian getting drunk and having sex with a girl he just met, was the most nonsensical thing anyone who knew him could think.

But Rian did have sex with Courtney and he only managed to feel bad about for about thirty seconds before he realized he liked the feeling of not being the perfect guy anyone. He liked having a dirty little secret and while he did still love Megan, he had no regrets for cheating on her.

He was careful about cheating again, because he knew if he wasn't careful the wrong person would find out, like Jack, and that would almost be like a direct line to Megan.

He waited before he cheated again. He waited until after the tour passed through their hometown and he saw Megan again and the weekend they spent together was perfect. For Megan mostly because they were actually together and as far as she knew, she still had the world's perfect boyfriend. But for Rian it was perfect because, besides seeing Megan, he realized he'd gotten away with cheating and knew if he was just as careful as he'd been the first time, he could get away with it over, and over and over.
***

"Well, thanks again," Rian said, squeezing the hand of his latest conquest. Her name was Jennie and she worked at the box office in the venue the band was playing their last show of The Shortest Tour Ever at.

"You're welcome," she purred, leaning forward and pressing her lips fully to Rian's. "Don't forget to call next time you're in town."

"Of course," he told her, like he told them all and gave her a rehearsed smile before slipping from the room and closing the door behind him. "It's too easy," he mumbled to himself before he walked right into Jack.

"What are doing?" Jack asked, eyebrow raised.
"Nothing. Soundcheck soon?"

"In an hour. Did you just leave that room?" Jack asked, motioning to the door Rian just closed.

"Uh.." he paused. "Yeah I thought it was the bathroom."

"It says right on the door it's the box office," Jack pointed out.

"Which is why I realized I was wrong. What's your problem?"

Jack opened his mouth to say something, but snapped it shut right away after Jennie had walked out of the room, winking at Rian and reminding him to call her. "Clearly, I'm not the one with the problem."

"I don't have a problem," Rian shrugged.

Who would consider having tons of sex with tons of hot girls a problem?

"Oh, you do. Your fly is undone and there's a nasty looking mark on your neck. What'd you do? Get in a fight with a vacuum?" Jack asked, shaking his head in disgust.

"It's none of your business, now is it Jack?" he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"There's something different about you," Jack nodded. "I've been noticing it more and more over this passed year."

"There's nothing different about me," Rian argued.

"Yes there is," Jack said. "The old Rian wouldn't cheat on his girlfriend."

"I never-" he tried but Jack just blew him off.

"Save it, Rian. I've had my suspicions for a long time but that little display right now confirmed it for me," Jack said before he turned to walk away.

"Wait," Rian yelled, running after him and grabbing Jack's arm. "Does she know?"

"Who Megan?" he shook his head. "No. Not yet. But if too much time goes by and you don't tell her, I'm going to."
***

Megan Mason was really excited to have her friends and her boyfriend home for a few weeks before they hit the road again for a big fall tour.

She figured the next few weeks were going to be great and her and Rian would spend a lot of time together, in between her going to school.
They even had a trip planned to get away for a weekend, just the two of them and Megan was really excited.

But that all was sort of shot to shit one day when Jack asked Megan to meet her in the park so they could talk. And the last time Jack had approached Megan in such a serious matter "to talk" he had asked her if she could help him with his senior Research Paper because if he didn't get a good grade, he risked failing the class and not graduating on time.

"Jack, what's wrong?" Megan asked as they sat in almost silence on the bench under the big oak tree in the middle of the park. The same bench Rian and Megan sat when Rian asked Megan to be his girlfriend. Jack pretended like he didn't know that.

"Look, if someone knew something that could potentially hurt someone else, someone should tell that someone else still right? Because that person should know."

"Jack," she bit her lip nervously. "What happened?"

"Look, I'm sorry okay, but I really don't know how else to say this," he started nervously.

"Jack, please?"

"Rian's cheating on you," he blurted out, his heart sinking into his stomach as Megan looked like she'd been slapped in the face.

"What?" she gasped. "That's not possible."

"I'm sorry," Jack said again, shaking his head.

"No," she said, tears pooling in her eyes. "Rian wouldn't cheat on me, Jack. You're wrong."

"It's been going on since November. I caught him and then he confessed to the whole thing."

She shook her head in disbelief. "Why didn't he tell me?"

"I don't know," Jack shrugged, standing up when she did. "I gave him the chance to tell you before Warped even started, and I guess he didn't."

Megan wiped a tear off her cheek and Jack felt his heart break all over for his friend. "You have to be wrong, Jack. Rian loves me and he wouldn't do something like that," she said, turning and walking away from Jack.

At that moment Megan knew her fairytale romance with Rian Dawson was over. Jack was one of her best friends and someone she trusted more than anything. There was no way he would lie to her or could even possibly attempt to lie to her about something so huge.

Megan got into her car and took off in the direction of the one place she had no desire to be at the moment, but knew she needed to settle it all, once and for all.
***

Rian Dawson knew he messed up. He knew he should have been more careful. But he'd gotten cocky and Jack caught him. And he knew one way or another Megan was going to find out about his not-so-secret-anymore secret but he didn't actually think Jack would have the balls to tell her.

Jack was the least confrontational person Rian knew and there was no way he'd actually tell Megan that Rian wasn't the perfect boyfriend everyone thought.

Rian was wrong and he was also a coward. Because no mater how many chances he'd gotten, he couldn't bring himself to tell Megan. And he wasn't sure if he was afraid to tell her because that would mean admitting defeat, and he didn't get away with cheating like he intended. Or if he was afraid of hurting Megan. Or maybe it was a mix of both.

"Rian!" Megan yelled as she walked through the door of Rian's house, not really caring all too much if anyone else was there.

Rian jumped and turned from the sink in the kitchen and planted a smile on his face when he saw Megan. He knew right then and there Megan knew and he was fucked. Megan was a smart girl and there was no way she'd stay with a boy who fucked around on her. Rian wished he thought of that sooner.

"Hey baby," he said, walking towards.

"Don't," she said, holding her hand up.

"What's wrong?"

"You know exactly what is wrong, Rian!" she yelled. "You cheated on me?"

"Baby," he shook his head.

"Answer the question, Rian. Jack told me you did, but if you tell me he lied than I'll believe you," she said, tears welling up in her eyes.

"I'm sorry," he said after a few moments of silence and it was all he needed to say to give Megan her answer and she turned away from him, tears slipping from her eyes.

"Why?" she asked, looking up at him finally. "Did I do something?"

"No," he shook his head. "You didn't do anything, Meg. You were perfect."

"I must not have been," she snapped. "Why else would you have done this to us?"

"I'm sorry," he said again and for the first time since that one thirty-second span, he felt guilty for what he'd done.

"Sorry? Rian you being sorry doesn't mean anything. I never thought we'd be having this fight," she sniffled.

"You're right," he said. "And it never should have started and I'm sorry."

"Why did it?" she asked.

He shrugged, disgusted in himself when the only reason he would come up with was that he knew he was getting away with it. "I'm not sure. It just happened once and when you never found out, I figured I could always get away with it."

She shook her head, scoffing a bit. "I appreciate the honesty Rian, but it's too late."

"I'm sorry," he said again, stepping closer to her and reaching for her hand. "If I could take it all back, I would. I would have said no that first night and this never would have happened."

"You're right," she nodded, slipping the ring he'd given her so long ago from her finger and placing it in his hand. "You should have said no then you'd still have me."