Teal.

“I’m going to tell you a secret about that book, so listen carefully, okay?”

It was expectedly cold on the streets and the pair walked back to their apartments, decidedly a coffee shop wasn’t the place to have the conversation they were set on track to. It would be Teal’s, as she still wasn’t quite finished unpacking and she had been quite serious about his assistance with the process if need be. If they were going to talk, there may as well be some production.

“Do tell,” Julian replied, still utterly amused by the girl’s lack of ability to handle the cold. She tugged at her hat, trying to make sure it completely covered her ears which had taken a slightly pink tint in the winter air.

“That book was never supposed to see the light of day,” Teal stated.

“Is that so?” Julian asked. “Did you have to fight that hard to get it published?”

She shook her head, offering a strange, tight lipped grin. “Actually, I didn’t want it published.”

“Sorry, I don’t think I quite follow you,” he said. “You submitted it to the publishers, didn’t you?”

“Well, you see, there was a bit of a mishap,” she sighed. “I was an idiot when it came to labeling my files back then, I really was. I always titled my writings with the initials of the title, so there was C.A. and CA on my flash drive at the time, Culling Autumn and Changing Alex. I meant to send Culling Autumn in, but I was a bit stressed out at the time, so the publishers got their hands on Changing Alex instead. I know, I know it sounds stupid and ridiculous, but it’s not the first time it’s happened. My first year of college I had two files labeled AS; one was a paper I was working on about Asperger’s Syndrome and another was a story I was working on called Adverse Situations. I don’t want to discuss what it was about, but we’ll just say I couldn’t go back to class after that.”

Julian was laughing. He couldn’t help it, but he was. The prospect of what she had just told him was fantastically amusing, and with such a title how could he not jump to conclusions about what the story the teacher had received was about? He felt her slap through his coat arm as she let out an irritated groan.

“Oh, shut up,” she snapped. “I’ve learned, okay? I sort my stories by full name and separate them with folders now. No more mix ups.”

“That is wonderful, Teal, folders are separated by genre, correct? Dramatic romance, humor… smutty romance novels?”

Teal smacked him again, this time on the chest, and a bit harder. “Keep it up, Julian, and next time it’ll be that pretty face of yours.”

“Pretty? Did you just call my face pretty?” he turned to her with an incredulous stare.

“Yes, yes I did,” she said, staring straight ahead as they continued to walk. “Is there a problem?”

“I am a guy, I am not pretty,” se stated seriously.

Teal chuckled. “Oh my, have I hit a nerve? I beg to differ, you’re quite pretty. Guys can indeed be pretty and I’d say you definitely fit the criteria.”

Julian went to open his mouth when she started to speak again, an edge of something unpleasant in her voice. “In fact, why don’t we ask her?”

There were some things Julian hadn’t thought about while he’d been out for coffee with Teal; yes the movie and the book had been heavy on his mind, but the light change of conversation had been nice, enjoyable even. But not ten feet away stood one of the things he’d been trying so very hard not to think about over the past few weeks. There, in front of his building was the woman with thick black hair, eyes like the night sky, and legs that would make anyone envious. The jet black locks were being blown in a chaotic mess in front of those deep navy eyes which were dead set on him as she strode down the sidewalk like it was a runway.

“Well this could be good,” Teal commented, just loud enough for him to hear. He didn’t give her the glower he wanted to though, he couldn’t. He couldn’t look away from Claire. All the emotions he had tried to conquer or suppress since he learned the truth seemed to bubble up inside of him. He wasn’t ready to face her; he just wasn’t. Eventually he would have had to anyways, once filming for the new season started he’d have no choice but to interact with her. But that was still a bit away, and he wasn’t prepared, not for this; not for her.

“Hello, Julian.” Claire’s voice was sweet and clear as a crystal as she stopped slowly in front of them, keeping her eyes set on his.

“Hello.” It was quiet and cold as it left his lips.

“I was hoping to catch you at home, so this works out rather well. I’d like to talk to you,” Claire requested softly. Who could say no to her, who could say no to that? It was one thing to avoid her, but a confrontation? That was an entirely different matter.

“You’re Claire, aren’t you?”

Their gaze broke as they both looked to Julian’s side, at the much shorter girl whose light eyes were set lazily on Claire.

“Yes, and who’re you?” the black-haired beauty replied stiffly, eyeing her up and down.

“Teal. I saw you that day, at the train station with that guy, and then here, with Julian.” Teal, in that instant, shattered any of the unsettling calm, destroyed the strange sensation Julian had felt at the first sight of his former flame. “I must say, your level of discretion is astounding.”

Claire recoiled, a horrified, bitter look gracing her face as she watched the writer. “Excuse me? Who do you think you are?”

“You know, sometimes I’m not so sure about that myself. But I can tell you who I’m not; I’m not some smug starlet are who cheats on my boyfriend of two years and then shows back up at his place, more than likely to beg for another chance because my friend on the side let me go.” the words that left her lips were smothered in a gentle, kind tone as she crossed her arms over her chest. “Actually, I think I do know a little bit of who I am; I’m a bitter twenty-three year old who’s seen this type of thing too many times and I’ve finally broken my filter. I’m what he would be if he let you come back. Because you’d probably do it again. Now if you really want to speak to him you’re more than welcome to come up and help me unpack with him. He’s got a previous engagement, so it’s your call.”

Claire said nothing as she stared, completely and utterly shocked by Teal Emerson. Julian as well found words hard to come by, feelings hovering between irritation and appreciation as he watched her keep her composure; well, for the most part. There was the light smile on her lips that didn’t remotely reflect the sharp flames raging in her eyes, the anger, the loathing as she held Claire’s gaze.

“You… you’re… the girl from the tabloids. The girl they photographed Julian with,” Claire said, no rebuttal apparent, just a shock that seemed to have broken her mind as she recognized the girl.

“Yep. You were in that tabloid too, weren’t you? Twice. The difference is? I’d never seen him before in my life; I’d never seen you before. I was having a conversation, innocent enough. But you? Adultery isn’t very flattering, and now the entirety of Britain that cares enough to look gets to see it. Now, if you’ll excuse us, it’s cold and I have no desire to further converse with a brick wall.”

Without another word, Teal stepped around the other girl, and made her way towards the entrance to the apartments. Julian exhaled with a puff of white, slowly stepping to follow her as he buried his hands in his pockets.

“Wait, Julian?” Claire’s voice came at his side. He looked over, shaking his head as he gave her a tight lipped smile.

“Sorry, Claire. Tell John, well, tell John it may be time to look for a new lead actor,” he said softly. “I don’t really think tension between myself, the lead actress, and the head writer is good for the show’s production, do you?”

He walked away then, refusing to turn and look back at the girl he once called his. There was the ache again, the one that came with the flood of memories of the good times they had when they were together. Her smile, the way her eyes twinkled like a star-filled night sky when she was happy. The way she looked at him, the way her arms felt around him. Those were just memories though; that was the past, and it was time to let go.

A wave of warmth hit him as he came through the doors, eyes immediately settling on the small figure standing next to the lift, back to him. He approached her slowly, footsteps marring the quiet of the lobby. Julian stopped a few paces back from her, watching as her shoulders rose and fell beneath the gray coat. She didn’t turn.

“I know that was out of place. I know, and I’m sorry. It was just the way she said that I…” she trailed off. “That conversation we need to have? Now is probably a good time to do that, if you still want to.”

“Fine. But we’re doing it at my place. If we’re going to talk, we’re going to do it properly, without distractions like unpacked boxes,” Julian said as the lift opened and he stepped around her into the small box. She followed him without a word, face oddly blank, lacking the vibrancy he was getting used to.

Once in his apartment he hung his coat up, and Teal followed suit. Her curls were messy and disheveled as she removed the hat, awkward and uncertain as she stepped into his clean, mostly white apartment. As they reached the living area, he sat on the couch; she curled up in the black chair in the corner beside it, as far away from him as the space would allow.

“That really, really wasn’t your place to say any of that back there,” he commented quietly.

“I know. It wasn’t my business. But how differently do you think things would have turned out for Elizabeth if someone had said something like that to Alex the night he begged for her forgiveness, and he got it?” she asked.

Julian scoffed, shaking his head. “You’re joking, aren’t you? You did it because you wanted to avoid the possibility of the scenario you wrote for your characters?”

“There was a good reason that book was never supposed to see the light of day.” she sighed, rubbing her eyes. “There’s a difference between writing about what you know, and writing about you. Alex was based off someone I knew, and same for Elizabeth, and most of the characters in that book. Some of the things in there actually happened, just with character names, and new places. Some of that was actually real; that scene for example. That happened, and there was no one to save her, no one to stand by her side when Alex came humbly crawling back. That’s why I couldn’t just stand there. You forgive them, you let them come back, and you’ve still got that pain from what they’ve done, not to mention the chance of it worsening if and when they hurt you again. I don’t think I could watch someone else go through that again. That’s why.”

“Those things, they actually happened?” Julian asked, watching her avoid his gaze, playing with the string that was attached to the hem of her shirt.

“Yeah. Some of them,” she replied, a twinge of discomfort in her tone.

“And people found out you wrote about them,”h stated. “Is that why you ran?”

“Oh yes, they found out,” she scoffed. “And yes. I ran. And now I’ve tied you up in it, with Claire, and the movie.”

The movie; the movie he didn’t want to audition for; the role he knew he would despise. Why? Because it did remind him of Claire in some ways, it wasn’t just Alex was everything he loathed.

“So why, Teal, why me, why this role?” he asked, watching every move she made, every slight shift, every inhale and exhale.

She looked up, a determined, earnest gleam in her eyes. “I want you because you’re nothing like him. I know what they’re going to do; they’re going to cast him, just with a different face. I don’t want that, I don’t want those bitter, resentful feelings again. But if it’s you? Oh, if it’s you I’ll be okay. Because I’ve seen what I have, and I know what she did to you, and that’s all I can see, really. The audiences, you’ll fool them. To them you’ll be him, you’ll deliver. But to me? To me you’re the guy on the sidewalk that November day, the one whose heart I knew was about to take a direct hit. To me you’re the one who needs the shoulder to lean on. This is all selfish, I know. This is why the movie’s production is riding on your presence, because I’m selfish.”

It was because of what Claire had done to him, and because Teal had seen it that he ended up where he was, because somehow she had associated him with Elizabeth to some extent, and still did—as made clear by her reaction to Claire minutes earlier, and her confession of the story’s origins.

“I want to apologize though, for what I said to Claire earlier, and what I’ve done to you with this movie, and this role. I knew you wouldn’t like it. Anyone who has had that done to them would hate it. So I’m sorry for that.”

“You are indeed horribly, and ridiculously selfish,” he sighed, rubbing his temples as he processed what she had told him. “What if I told you that I genuinely don’t want it, that I want less than nothing to do with this role, this story? What would you say?”

“Think about what’s riding on it; your agent’s career, the movie’s production. Consider the others.” serious and biting her words carried through the air. Julian inhaled heavily closing his eyes; of course. Then, a slight tinkling laughter echoed through the room. “Is that what you expected me to say? Sorry, but I can’t do that. If you don’t want to touch it, I can’t blame you, honestly. You don’t have to. I can mail my editor and tell her I’m retracting that stipulation; that the story is all theirs. I’m not going to make you do that; I’m not going to make you take the role, or even audition for it if you don’t want to. It’s entirely up to you. I’m stubborn, a selfish, a bit forward, but I’m not cruel.”

“So this was all you, then? This hassle, stress and rubbish about the audition was all you?”

“Every single bit.”

There it was, the true source of his troubles from the time he opened the book until then, not sitting ten feet away from him, watching him with the same light, wide eyes she had on the day they first met. His new neighbor, his herald of dark news, Teal.

“I don’t know what to think about this, what to think about you, to be honest,” he stated, running his fingers along his jaw. Perplexed was t he first word that came to mind; perplexed was the perfect word. It was what Teal made him feel, to a T.

“I’ll be honest, Julian.” she smiled. “I want you to go. I really, really do. But I can’t and won’t force you. I’m sorry for all this, the movie, and Claire. I think I should probably go. I’ll mail my editor as soon as I can, and get all this straightened out.”

There it was; that strange air about her. The honesty and that odd sense of freedom to choose his own fate and life she loved to dangle in front of him so lightly. Perhaps she was manipulative, perhaps it was just her; he wasn’t sure, and he didn’t know if he ever would be. That pressure to go to the audition seemed much lighter, much less of a burden. In fact, it really didn’t seem near as awful as it had initially. Yes, he hated the character, loathed, detested, completely abhorred. But she had a point; he could never see himself becoming that. He could act; he could be Alex for the audience. But was he really? No, not in the least.

Teal’s coat was on as he seemed to come back to reality; she was wrapping the warm scarf around her neck again in preparation for the thirty second trek.

“When are you planning on painting your apartment?”

She looked over her shoulder, motions slowing to a complete stop. The wild curls partially hid her face, but the twinkle from the one eye he could see was hard to miss.

“Thursday,” she said.

Julian shook his head. “No, that’s no good for me. Mind holding off until Friday?”

“Why?” she asked as she turned to face him.

“Why what?”

“Everything. Why everything,” she replied evenly.

Julian smiled. “You may need some help; that’s quite a lot of painting for one person to do alone. As for why Friday, I’ve got an audition to attend Thursday.”

“Didn’t I tell you to think things through instead of jumping straight in?” Teal sighed.

“I did,” he said. “And I realized it’s just an audition. I’m not guaranteed anything. There’s no harm in that. Also, I realized I didn’t thank you.”

“Thank me? For what?” she queried, eyebrows pulling together as she graced him with a puzzled stare.

“For Claire earlier,” he admitted. “Mind you, it wasn’t your place to say any of what you did, and you really shouldn’t have. But I’m glad you did, because I wasn’t ready, not for that confrontation. And I would have said yes if you hadn’t done that. More than likely, I would have given her another chance if she wanted it. But how would that work? There’s no trust there, probably no happiness. Honestly, I don’t really think there ever could be at this point. So thank you for saying what you did down there.”

Teal stepped forward a little, leaning against the wall as she watched him silently, toying with the hat in her hands. “I swear, you’re so much braver than I ever expected. Be it Claire, or this damned movie. You’re brave, and I owe you for that.”

“Perhaps we should just call it even?” he offered.

Teal paused a moment, and then nodded with a slight smile. “I’m going to go. Get some sleep once the coffee wears off, you’re going to crash.”

“No worries, I’ll sleep. And I’ll see you on Friday.” he stood, getting up to follow her to the door.

“Oh, if Claire shows up again, and you need back up, just call the front desk and get my number. I’ll take it from there,” Teal teased. Or perhaps she didn’t; perhaps she was serious. Regardless, he’d probably take that offer if the situation arose.

“I’ll count on that,” he mused, holding the door as she stepped out.

With a small wave Teal Emerson shot up the stairs and out of his sight. With a heavy sigh, Julian shut the door, realizing that coffee crash may be sooner than either of them anticipated. He went to his room, crawling straight into bed and let the warm embrace of sleep wash over him. The stress and anger were less than they had been in a long while, the blanket of dreams quick and welcome.