Sharpen Your Knives and Prepare for War

You say I have a great life.
You say my family loves me.
You say they understand me.
You say your life sucks.

You say you wish you were me.

You shouldn't wish that.
You don't know the half of it.
You only see the good stuff.
You see the stuff you want to see.

You don't see INSIDE.

You don't see the hate.
You don't see the torture.
You don't see my depression.

I've learned to mask it.
Just like I mask the scars.

I have so much resentment towards my family.
Towards the world.

I feel lost, stuck, tortured.
The worst part is that I don't know why.
People have worst lives than me.
I still feel stuck, tortured, lost.

I'm not abused.
My family does love me.
They don't understand.
I've cause my mother so much stress.

You don't wish you were me.
I don't wish I was me.
I don't want to live.
It's okay if I die.
Nobody needs me.

I'm just a nobody.
A stuck soul who doesn't know where to go with her life.
A depressed, hurt soul who doesn't know why her family loves her.
Doesn't know what good she is.
I'm just nobody.

That's my world, INSIDE.

You wouldn't want to be me if you could feel the inside.