‹ Prequel: Let Me Go
Status: discontinued
Promise That You'll Remember That You're Mine
pieces and parts of me left
2006
The sun’s rays crept slowly into her room. As more light escaped from the curtains, Ivy became more aware of the day looming ahead. The warmth from the sun and the clanging of pots downstairs let her know that it was time to get out of bed and get on with the day. She let out a sigh and stretched her arms above her head. She closed her eyes again and willed the sun to go away and give her a few more hours of sleep.
It didn’t happen. Ivy dragged herself from her bed and moved across her room slowly, and took what she needed from her closet. Gwen’s singing and breakfast being made could be heard from the second floor as she made breakfast. She wanted to yell at her to keep quiet but she didn’t have the energy to bother. And frankly she didn’t really care.
The bathroom door was slightly ajar when Ivy reached it. Steam still fogged up the mirror showing that her aunt already used it this morning. She peeled her pyjamas off her body and stepped in the shower. The water was warm as it engulfed her body, relaxing her tired body. She stood there for some time letting the water drown her thoughts, keeping her mind tranquil. Finally, she was slightly at peace. Then the water turned cold.
A curse left her mouth, “Great, even the heater gave up on me.” Just when she thought the day wasn’t that bad this happens. There was nothing she could do but accept the fact that today was going to be a terrible day. Sighing, she turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. She grabbed a towel and started drying herself. Then she picked up her fresh clothes and put them on, not bothering to do her make up.
“Thank you for doing this, Honey!” Gwen said as she slid into the passenger seat, “I really appreciate it. I mean you can’t really drive with a sprained ankle, now can you?” Gwendolyn Farkas was her mother’s cousin. She was in her late twenties and she worked as a History Teacher in a nearby high school.
“No problem,” she mumbled.
Ivy drove down the busy streets filled with school buses and pedestrians. The heat was not making her terrible mood any better. It was another sunny day in Arizona, and the worst part about it was that it was sunny every day. Sunny was an understatement, it was scorching and dry. It had been two weeks and she had yet to get use to the weather. Every day it was the same: hot, dry, and boring.
She still hasn’t found anything she liked about this place. Other than the fact her parents shipped her off her after the incident, Ivy didn’t mesh well with the people here, with their year-round tans and lives that were mundane and lacked excitement. Her pale skin stuck out like a sore thumb, and her choice of hobbies weren’t exactly what you would find in this town.
She was constantly being told that she should just give it sometime and she would come to love Arizona. So far that hasn’t happened. Arizona was a far cry from New York. New York was alive. She felt the thrill of the city every time she took a step on the street. She could feel the power radiating from the high rise buildings and the flurry of people who walked with purpose. Excitement pumped through her blood as she danced on the stage there. People there understood her and just clicked with her personality. New York was where she belonged. But here she was in Arizona, another prime example of her useless parents being useless.
Her parents were kind and intelligent people. They knew how to build businesses and kept them at the top of its game. Yet unlike how cliché movies pictured busy parents as people who neglected their children, they were far from that. She was never neglected as a child; in fact despite her parents’ busy lives, they still doted on her and showed their love and compassion. Well, until what happened.
After that, her parents just drifted into their own world. They piled on more and more work, and took part in more business ventures. They became much more powerful and successful. Their careers seemed so picturesque from other people’s views but not to Ivy. They ignored her and never gave her the time of day. Suddenly her parents disappeared from her life. During the time she needed them most they were gone. For a while, she tried to reason with herself that it was an expected action for them to throw themselves into their work. But that didn’t give them the right to neglect her and pretend that she didn’t exist. Were they not worried about her at all? Was she that useless to them? In the eyes of her parents she had become a nuisance, simply an extra mouth to feed. So they shipped her off to Arizona, reasoning that this was only temporary. They just need some time to forget what happened.
“Oh we’re here,” Gwen’s velvety voice interrupted he thoughts. And as she had said they had arrived at the school. Gwen continued to say her thanks as she helped her out of the passenger seat.
“I’ll help you to your room,” Ivy said, picking up her aunt’s belongings.
“Thank you so much, dear, I don’t know what I would do without you”
Everyone stared as they slowly walked down the hallway, murmuring and gossiping to each other. Gwen’s sprained ankle didn’t rattle them but her identity did. They were all whispering to each other about who she could possibly be. Their whispering didn’t stop until they were out of the hallway and in the classroom. She didn’t want to go out into the hallway again. Instead she wanted to stay in the classroom, where she was safe from all their murmuring, but she couldn’t do that.
She stepped into the hallway quietly, and started walking back to her car. The whispers hadn’t ceased as she got to the hall. Her presence intensified the whispers. It was as if everyone had something to say. She felt like a piece of meat and they were hungry wolves. Suddenly, she was 16 again, everyone had their eyes on her waiting for her to fuck up, everyone was talking about her whispering and murmuring to each other about every wrong she did and everything she wasn’t able to do. Ivy rushed to her car, desperate to leave the establishment. She tried to calm her breathing and started the ignition.
By the time she had pulled out of the lot, a rotten feeling had shoved its way into her stomach. It had burned its way down her chest and pitted itself into her stomach. She was back to square one, with all her fears taunting her and messing with her. Their murmurings were stuck in her head, mocking her and laughing at her. Ivy had tried to convince herself that they didn’t know her and what had happened but their murmurings were enough to wake up her mind. It had woken up all the evil lurking in her mind. Now, it was shouting at her; placing all her fears and memories back in the front of her mind. She had tried so hard to shove them deeper to the back of her mind and bury them so that she wouldn't remember. Her mind wouldn't let her.
This was enough to get her fidgety and her vision blurry. Ivy’s hands were loose on the wheel and she couldn't focus on the road. She had no choice but to pull up on the side of the road. She sat there as everything started to pull on her. The knot in her stomach was twisting and pulling around, making her feel sick and raw. This exhausted her, she felt worse than she did this morning. She had planned on sleeping in but she had no choice to get up, and now she felt more miserable than before.
Her mind was loud with the thoughts of the past year and everything that happened. She thought of him and how she couldn't save him, and how long it had been since she’d seen him. But it was impossible to see him now. Everything hurt, and she wanted it to stop. She’d tried to let everything go, but it wouldn't let her go.
All this time, she couldn't say it out loud, but it had been a slight relief to be in Arizona because no one knew her past. No one here knew what had happened. No one had any reason to talk about her. Ivy would at least have that luxury.
It looks like Arizona wasn't that different after all.
The sun’s rays crept slowly into her room. As more light escaped from the curtains, Ivy became more aware of the day looming ahead. The warmth from the sun and the clanging of pots downstairs let her know that it was time to get out of bed and get on with the day. She let out a sigh and stretched her arms above her head. She closed her eyes again and willed the sun to go away and give her a few more hours of sleep.
It didn’t happen. Ivy dragged herself from her bed and moved across her room slowly, and took what she needed from her closet. Gwen’s singing and breakfast being made could be heard from the second floor as she made breakfast. She wanted to yell at her to keep quiet but she didn’t have the energy to bother. And frankly she didn’t really care.
The bathroom door was slightly ajar when Ivy reached it. Steam still fogged up the mirror showing that her aunt already used it this morning. She peeled her pyjamas off her body and stepped in the shower. The water was warm as it engulfed her body, relaxing her tired body. She stood there for some time letting the water drown her thoughts, keeping her mind tranquil. Finally, she was slightly at peace. Then the water turned cold.
A curse left her mouth, “Great, even the heater gave up on me.” Just when she thought the day wasn’t that bad this happens. There was nothing she could do but accept the fact that today was going to be a terrible day. Sighing, she turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. She grabbed a towel and started drying herself. Then she picked up her fresh clothes and put them on, not bothering to do her make up.
“Thank you for doing this, Honey!” Gwen said as she slid into the passenger seat, “I really appreciate it. I mean you can’t really drive with a sprained ankle, now can you?” Gwendolyn Farkas was her mother’s cousin. She was in her late twenties and she worked as a History Teacher in a nearby high school.
“No problem,” she mumbled.
Ivy drove down the busy streets filled with school buses and pedestrians. The heat was not making her terrible mood any better. It was another sunny day in Arizona, and the worst part about it was that it was sunny every day. Sunny was an understatement, it was scorching and dry. It had been two weeks and she had yet to get use to the weather. Every day it was the same: hot, dry, and boring.
She still hasn’t found anything she liked about this place. Other than the fact her parents shipped her off her after the incident, Ivy didn’t mesh well with the people here, with their year-round tans and lives that were mundane and lacked excitement. Her pale skin stuck out like a sore thumb, and her choice of hobbies weren’t exactly what you would find in this town.
She was constantly being told that she should just give it sometime and she would come to love Arizona. So far that hasn’t happened. Arizona was a far cry from New York. New York was alive. She felt the thrill of the city every time she took a step on the street. She could feel the power radiating from the high rise buildings and the flurry of people who walked with purpose. Excitement pumped through her blood as she danced on the stage there. People there understood her and just clicked with her personality. New York was where she belonged. But here she was in Arizona, another prime example of her useless parents being useless.
Her parents were kind and intelligent people. They knew how to build businesses and kept them at the top of its game. Yet unlike how cliché movies pictured busy parents as people who neglected their children, they were far from that. She was never neglected as a child; in fact despite her parents’ busy lives, they still doted on her and showed their love and compassion. Well, until what happened.
After that, her parents just drifted into their own world. They piled on more and more work, and took part in more business ventures. They became much more powerful and successful. Their careers seemed so picturesque from other people’s views but not to Ivy. They ignored her and never gave her the time of day. Suddenly her parents disappeared from her life. During the time she needed them most they were gone. For a while, she tried to reason with herself that it was an expected action for them to throw themselves into their work. But that didn’t give them the right to neglect her and pretend that she didn’t exist. Were they not worried about her at all? Was she that useless to them? In the eyes of her parents she had become a nuisance, simply an extra mouth to feed. So they shipped her off to Arizona, reasoning that this was only temporary. They just need some time to forget what happened.
“Oh we’re here,” Gwen’s velvety voice interrupted he thoughts. And as she had said they had arrived at the school. Gwen continued to say her thanks as she helped her out of the passenger seat.
“I’ll help you to your room,” Ivy said, picking up her aunt’s belongings.
“Thank you so much, dear, I don’t know what I would do without you”
Everyone stared as they slowly walked down the hallway, murmuring and gossiping to each other. Gwen’s sprained ankle didn’t rattle them but her identity did. They were all whispering to each other about who she could possibly be. Their whispering didn’t stop until they were out of the hallway and in the classroom. She didn’t want to go out into the hallway again. Instead she wanted to stay in the classroom, where she was safe from all their murmuring, but she couldn’t do that.
She stepped into the hallway quietly, and started walking back to her car. The whispers hadn’t ceased as she got to the hall. Her presence intensified the whispers. It was as if everyone had something to say. She felt like a piece of meat and they were hungry wolves. Suddenly, she was 16 again, everyone had their eyes on her waiting for her to fuck up, everyone was talking about her whispering and murmuring to each other about every wrong she did and everything she wasn’t able to do. Ivy rushed to her car, desperate to leave the establishment. She tried to calm her breathing and started the ignition.
By the time she had pulled out of the lot, a rotten feeling had shoved its way into her stomach. It had burned its way down her chest and pitted itself into her stomach. She was back to square one, with all her fears taunting her and messing with her. Their murmurings were stuck in her head, mocking her and laughing at her. Ivy had tried to convince herself that they didn’t know her and what had happened but their murmurings were enough to wake up her mind. It had woken up all the evil lurking in her mind. Now, it was shouting at her; placing all her fears and memories back in the front of her mind. She had tried so hard to shove them deeper to the back of her mind and bury them so that she wouldn't remember. Her mind wouldn't let her.
This was enough to get her fidgety and her vision blurry. Ivy’s hands were loose on the wheel and she couldn't focus on the road. She had no choice but to pull up on the side of the road. She sat there as everything started to pull on her. The knot in her stomach was twisting and pulling around, making her feel sick and raw. This exhausted her, she felt worse than she did this morning. She had planned on sleeping in but she had no choice to get up, and now she felt more miserable than before.
Her mind was loud with the thoughts of the past year and everything that happened. She thought of him and how she couldn't save him, and how long it had been since she’d seen him. But it was impossible to see him now. Everything hurt, and she wanted it to stop. She’d tried to let everything go, but it wouldn't let her go.
All this time, she couldn't say it out loud, but it had been a slight relief to be in Arizona because no one knew her past. No one here knew what had happened. No one had any reason to talk about her. Ivy would at least have that luxury.
It looks like Arizona wasn't that different after all.
♠ ♠ ♠
I'm sorry. I've been gone for a long time, and my only excuse is school and that I haven't been inspired to write anything at all. I know that this isn't really that great and it's messy, but I really wanted to update. I'm sorry if it doesn't make sense, but I've re-written some parts of the story so yeah. I'll try to get the next chapter up soon and maybe that will make more sense somehow. And I would have put this up sooner but I don't have internet, and I'm only relying on a mobile broadband stick that's being shared between 3 sisters so yeah. I'm sorry, but I'm trying.Oh and check this out if you have the time ^_^
The Salt In My Veins