I'm Only Me When I'm With You

I was sitting in my drama class, doodling on a piece of paper as I thought about Anna's and my conversation last night. I felt so guilty about not being able to say I love Ayden. I mean I should love him... I do love him... right? Then why couldn't I say it? Why did I change the subject?

This isn't the first time I've thought about this. Lately, it's been on my mind alot. Ayden's already told me he loved me, but I haven't said it to him. I want to... I really do... but something stops me everytime I try to. Ayden is so sweet and kind, he doesn't even mind that I haven't said it yet. He's told me that he'll wait for me to say it, but how much longer would he wait? Why wait for somebody that might not love you?

"Andie and Jasper." My head shot up at my name.

"Huh?" I asked, really loudly I might add. The whole class snickered, it was obvious I hadn't been paying attention. The teacher just shook her head and continued to name off names. Some people got up and moved to another seat. I saw Jasper heading towards the seat beside me.

"What are you doing?" I asked as he sat down beside me.

"I didn't peg you for a daydreamer. So who were you dreaming about? Let me guess, your meathead of a jock boyfriend, Ayden?" He smirked at me.

"He's not a meathead." I glared at him.

"Sounds like someone's in denial." He sang quietly.

"Sunds like someone's jealous." I sang back.

"Why would I be jealous of a guy who has nothing I want?" For some reason this statement made me mad. I glared even harder at him.

"Are you going to tell me what we're doing?" I asked.

"You're mad? Why?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Fine. I guess whatever it is, we'll fail." I shrugged, not answering his question. Truthfully I didn't know why I was mad.

"Alright. Miss Kason picked partners and paired you and me together. We have to come up with a skit that puts a modern twist on one of Shakespears plays." He said.

"Ok... so what play should we do?" I asked.

"Well I was thinking Romeo and Juliet. You know the blacony scene where Juliet says 'Romeo, Romeo, where for art thou Romeo'." His voice went high as he immitated Juliet. I tried to hide my smile at his horrible, yet obviously funny immitation.

"Everybody is going to do Romeo and Juliet. I think we should do something original like... Taming a Shrew." I said. His eyebrows came together in confusion.

"What?" He asked.

"Nevermind. Romeo and Juliet it is." I sighed.

"Great. I guess we should work on turning this into a modern piece." For the rest of the class Jasper and I worked on the script. Jasper was really funny, I swear I haven't laughed so much in my whole life, then again, being a class clown, Jasper knew how to make people laugh. I hate to admit it, but he really wasn't all that bad. And that's why I feel so guilty. This is my best friend's ex boyfriend. I should hate him, not laugh with him.

"So, I guess we can work on this when I come over after school?" Jasper asked as the lunch bell rang.

"Umm yea. That'd be great." My mouth said the words before I could stop them. I should have said no! Best friend's boyfriend! Does that phrase not ring a bell or something?! I feel like I'm betraying my best friend!

"Actually she can't." I looked behind me surprised as I heard Ayden's voice. I should be greatful to have an out so I wouldn't have to spend time on this project with Jasper, but I was just confused. Why couldn't I work on the skit?

"Oh my bad, I didn't know you controlled her life." Jasper said sarcastically. I opened my mouth to deny that he controlled my life when Ayden interrupted me.

"We have a date after school." Oh yea!

"Oh my god, I can't believe I forgot about that. He's right Jasper. Umm... maybe tomorrow or something." Stupid mouth! Why can't I shut up!

"Sure. I have to go." Jasper grabbed his stuff and quickly left. I couldn't help but feel a little bad. Why though? I didn't do anything wrong.

"You ready?" Ayden asked. His tone made me look up at him confused. He sounded mad and upset.

"What's wrong?" I asked him.

"Nothing, I just love seeing my girlfriend flirt with other guys, especially when she knows I'm in the same room."

"Flirt? Ayden, what are you talking about? I wasn't flirting with Jasper." I shook my head, surprised that he actually thought I would flirt, with Jasper no less.

"It didn't look like that to me." He turned to walk away, but I put my hand on his arm, stopping him.

"Ayden, believe me, I would never flirt with Jasper. I mean, for one, he's my best friend's ex, not to mention Kyle's best friend. And besides, why would I want to flirt with any other guy when I have the most amazing boyfriend ever?" I smiled up at him. He smiled back down at me, all traces of anger gone.

"I'm sorry, I get a little jealous sometimes." He wrapped an arm around my waist, and kissed my forehead.

"It's ok. It's kind of cute. Next time you accuse me of flirting with another guy, at least pick a hotter guy than Jasper." I teased him.