Nightmare
Promises are made.
"Avalon! What's wrong?" Matt asked, shaking me awake "You were screaming and crying"
"I had the nightmare again and this time she killed you" I cried and Matt pulled me into a bear hug.
" That won't happen sweetie" He sighed
"Is she okay?" Leana asked softly from the doorway.
Jimmy was pissed at me, and if he knew she spoke to me, he'd get really mad, but Leana was too sweet to care.
"Just a nightmare" Matt said to her and she ran over and hugged me before running back to her and Jimmy's room "Do you want me to sleep here tonight?" Matt asked me.
I nodded and clutched Amanda's blue and white blanket to my chest and curled into Matt, holding onto him for dear life.
"Get some sleep Avalon. I'm here" Matt whispered and I fell asleep.
When I woke up, Matt had a really good grip on me and was practically laying on me.
I grabbed my phone and text Johnny 'Help please'
I heard 3 sets of footsteps running up the steps and Zacky, Johnny, and Brian all walked into my room.
"I can't get out and I don't wanna wake him" I whispered.
"I thought you were hurt or something" Johnny chuckled lightly and they helped me get out.
"Why would you text Johnny for help before you text me?" Brian asked while we walked down the stairs.
"Well Johnny's room is right next door to mine and he came to my room and talked to me calmly last night"
"Oh" Brian said.
"Well I'm not mad at you" Zacky said and threw his arm across my shoulder.
I knocked his arm off me and headed to the kitchen to help Gena cook as Brian and Johnny laughed at Zacky.
"Hey" Matt said to me as he walked into the kitchen "How'd you sleep?"
"Fine" I smiled lightly "Thanks again. For letting me live here and taking care of me"
"Don't worry about it" Matt said and kissed my head.
"Wait, so are you guys a couple now?" Lacey asked as she sat next to Johnny on the couch.
"No, not yet" Matt said and I, yet again, noticed how he said yet.
"We should do something fun tomorrow" Brian said and I looked down because Amanda's funeral was tomorrow.
"Remember Brian, we already have something to do" Matt said, trying to give him a hint by making eye motions towards me, Brian not getting the hint.
"Amanda's funeral is tomorrow" I spoke quietly.
"Oh, um, I'm gonna go...take a shower" Brian said and practically ran out of the living room.
"We're gonna go see if breakfast is done" Lacey said and her and Johnny went into the kitchen.
"You don't have to go Matt. I understand" I said.
"No! I'd feel terrible if I didn't, I wanna be there for you"
"Oh look, it's the suicidal bitch whose whoring around with our singer" Jimmy said "Come on Leana, you don't wanna be around her"
My eyes started to water and I ran upstairs to my room, locking the door to the bathroom and starting to cut myself so there was no space between any of my cuts.
I held my breath and got really dizzy before passing out, going to the forest.
I woke up with all of the guys and girls crowded around me besides Jimmy and Matt.
"Matt she's awake!" Zacky yelled and Matt ran in, his eyes red, from where he'd been crying.
He hugged me.
I saw Jimmy and began holding my breath again.
This time, Brian noticed and dumped his ice cold glass of water all over me, causing me to gasp.
Matt picked me up and ran with me upstairs to his room, laying with me on his bed and crying in my shoulder.
"Do you know what I'd do to myself if you commit suicide?" He cried "I probably would too"
I stared at me.
"Please don't do that anymore!" Matt begged "I can't stand it! It hurts me! Promise me that no matter what happens, you'll never do anything like that again!"
I stared at him more before saying "I promise"
"I had the nightmare again and this time she killed you" I cried and Matt pulled me into a bear hug.
" That won't happen sweetie" He sighed
"Is she okay?" Leana asked softly from the doorway.
Jimmy was pissed at me, and if he knew she spoke to me, he'd get really mad, but Leana was too sweet to care.
"Just a nightmare" Matt said to her and she ran over and hugged me before running back to her and Jimmy's room "Do you want me to sleep here tonight?" Matt asked me.
I nodded and clutched Amanda's blue and white blanket to my chest and curled into Matt, holding onto him for dear life.
"Get some sleep Avalon. I'm here" Matt whispered and I fell asleep.
When I woke up, Matt had a really good grip on me and was practically laying on me.
I grabbed my phone and text Johnny 'Help please'
I heard 3 sets of footsteps running up the steps and Zacky, Johnny, and Brian all walked into my room.
"I can't get out and I don't wanna wake him" I whispered.
"I thought you were hurt or something" Johnny chuckled lightly and they helped me get out.
"Why would you text Johnny for help before you text me?" Brian asked while we walked down the stairs.
"Well Johnny's room is right next door to mine and he came to my room and talked to me calmly last night"
"Oh" Brian said.
"Well I'm not mad at you" Zacky said and threw his arm across my shoulder.
I knocked his arm off me and headed to the kitchen to help Gena cook as Brian and Johnny laughed at Zacky.
"Hey" Matt said to me as he walked into the kitchen "How'd you sleep?"
"Fine" I smiled lightly "Thanks again. For letting me live here and taking care of me"
"Don't worry about it" Matt said and kissed my head.
"Wait, so are you guys a couple now?" Lacey asked as she sat next to Johnny on the couch.
"No, not yet" Matt said and I, yet again, noticed how he said yet.
"We should do something fun tomorrow" Brian said and I looked down because Amanda's funeral was tomorrow.
"Remember Brian, we already have something to do" Matt said, trying to give him a hint by making eye motions towards me, Brian not getting the hint.
"Amanda's funeral is tomorrow" I spoke quietly.
"Oh, um, I'm gonna go...take a shower" Brian said and practically ran out of the living room.
"We're gonna go see if breakfast is done" Lacey said and her and Johnny went into the kitchen.
"You don't have to go Matt. I understand" I said.
"No! I'd feel terrible if I didn't, I wanna be there for you"
"Oh look, it's the suicidal bitch whose whoring around with our singer" Jimmy said "Come on Leana, you don't wanna be around her"
My eyes started to water and I ran upstairs to my room, locking the door to the bathroom and starting to cut myself so there was no space between any of my cuts.
I held my breath and got really dizzy before passing out, going to the forest.
I woke up with all of the guys and girls crowded around me besides Jimmy and Matt.
"Matt she's awake!" Zacky yelled and Matt ran in, his eyes red, from where he'd been crying.
He hugged me.
I saw Jimmy and began holding my breath again.
This time, Brian noticed and dumped his ice cold glass of water all over me, causing me to gasp.
Matt picked me up and ran with me upstairs to his room, laying with me on his bed and crying in my shoulder.
"Do you know what I'd do to myself if you commit suicide?" He cried "I probably would too"
I stared at me.
"Please don't do that anymore!" Matt begged "I can't stand it! It hurts me! Promise me that no matter what happens, you'll never do anything like that again!"
I stared at him more before saying "I promise"
♠ ♠ ♠
I know I haven't undated in a long time.The reason is: Two of my best friends died in a car crash and one of my friends will have been missing for a year on Feb. 28th.
You don't know how it feels to have 3 of your best friends out of your life permanently
I have no idea how the Avenged guys deal with this. It amazes me.
I was about to commit suicide, I had the pill bottle in my hand, and my friend Charles walked in and gave me this huge speech about how people would miss me and no matter how bad your life gets, there's no reason for anyone to kill themselves: He told me to get a new perspective and look at it from his point of view, and how hurt he was that I would even consider that.
If it wasn't for Charles, I wouldn't be here.
So basically, what I'm saying, is no matter how hard your life gets, don't hurt yourself: because you're not only hurting yourself.
You're hurting you friends and family as well.