Hesitating and Suffocating

John looked up to see Cally, her dark hair in the way of those eyes he loved so much. “Are you writing a song?” She murmured, noticing the way he kept his head bent low over the paper and scribbling across sheet music. Her voice was different than John remembered, very tentative and afraid, different than the voice he had heard this morning.

He nodded slowly, and really took Cally in. She was so different, and it wasn’t just the hair. He tried so hard not to care as she gave a small smile. “What’s it to you?” He said roughly, the vodka beside him speaking for him. Cally’s smile fell from her lips, and she stepped back, her hands up in surrender.

“I just wanted to talk, but if you’re busy, we can talk later,” She said, and shook her head. “Or never. Whatever you want. I don’t need closure on you, remember. You need closure on me.” She looked at the sleeping Jamie, her ass hanging out of her shorts. “Or maybe you don’t.”

“Don’t act like you’re so important in my life, Cally,” John spat, and though that dug deep into Cally’s heart, she just shook her head and chewed on her lip. She was standing strong, and was really surprised she was doing it on her own.

“I was really important in your life, John, even if I’m not now. You were going to marry me, John. If that doesn’t make me important, I don’t know what does.” Cally turned around, putting her fedora back on her head as she walked back into the main dressing room, where everyone was drinking and having a good time.

Cally admitted to herself that his words hurt, but the ball was in his court now. She didn’t feel one way or another about him, except that he should have been there for her. Instead, she grabbed a red plastic cup with Coke in it and began to sip at it as she socialized, and re-met everyone who was once close to her.

She was talking to Kennedy, who was really quite cute with his hair short. She was leaning against the wall, laughing at his stupid jokes and learning about how much he loved his dog and his friends. “How close were we, Kenny?” She asked, crossing one Toms clad foot over the other. Kennedy smiled.

“Not as close as I would have liked,” Kennedy admitted sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck and not meeting Cally’s eyes. Cally gently touched his hand, and an electric spark sent up his arm that he didn’t expect.

“Then let’s get close now,” She said, and checked to make sure she had her pass to get back here by midnight before they headed off to their hotel for the night. “Wanna go roam around this town?” She asked, and Kennedy nodded, gently putting his beer down on the table, smiling at Cally.

“I’d love to,” He murmured, and she grabbed his hand and trying to sneak out.