Hesitating and Suffocating

Gemma looked at the dreary apartment they had rented for Cally in Chicago, where she would be staying for a month or so. The doctors there were the best with amnesia, and they were going to help her get her memory back. But for Gemma, it was another month away from Henry.

Cally remembered Gemma. She remembered everything up until the wedding. Cally, defeated and broken, excused and mutilated, set her bags down by the first open door, a bedroom. She spoke quietly, nervously, something unlike her. “You can go home, if you want.” Her voice was shaking. “I mean, I know you have your husband and you miss and-”

Gemma snorted. “Darling, no offense, but I want to make sure you’re fucking okay before I just ditch you again.” Cally smiled quietly, tucking her hair behind her ear, shorter than previously. Gemma had trimmed it down to about mid chest length, and it was dyed a deep black. It brought out her green eyes, and took attention away from the small, white scar under her chin from when she hit the ground.

Cally? Well, Cally hardly remembered the way she was before, and so she was indifferent. She felt odd. She felt, evidently, that a huge piece of her was missing, hidden behind a wall she couldn’t get behind, couldn’t see. She felt empty and numb, her hands shaking. She was having an identity crisis, something her doctors warned her about. She had a terrible feeling that somehow, this John character held the key to her happiness.

Instead, she grabbed her book, the last one she remembered checking out from the library. “The Notebook”, as well as “A Walk To Remember”, classic Nicholas Sparks novels. She remembered being on a huge kick, and she thought that the past seemed like the best place to start. Gemma was going crazy in the silence.

“Look, Calls, I’m going to get some of this famous deep dish pizza. Are you fine here alone?” Gemma asked, and in a most Cally-like thing, something Gemma hadn’t seen since the days of Howie, Cally peeked over the couch, sticking her tongue out over her lips.

She froze, seemed to see what was happened, and began to tear up. “Yes, I am fine here,” She said quietly, her voice shaky and nervous, like she was afraid Gemma was going to hit her. Gemma chewed on her lip, hating this. She hated how hard it was for her to watch it, to watch her best friend start over.

But maybe, that’s just what Cally needed. A new beginning, a new life to live. Maybe it was destiny, or karma. Gemma sighed again, heading down the stairs, and deciding that if anyone deserved a second chance, it was Cally.