Divine Chaos
11
I don’t even know how it happened. All I know is that when I woke up, Oliver bare-chested beside me, I couldn’t believe it. I squinted my eyes at him, and when the vision didn’t change I rubbed my eyes, wondering if this was real. But no, it was real, Oliver wasn’t going away. I sat up. We were in Oliver’s room. Our parents were gone on their honeymoon in Hawaii, leaving the house to us for a whole week. I stared at him for a while, trying to remember last night. Then it all came back to me.
“Wine cooler?” Oliver offered to me when I walked in from work last night.
I shrugged and took it from him. “Thanks,” I headed to my room.
I took a quick shower and got out, ready to climb into bed. I’d worked so hard this week. I felt exhausted. In the middle of changing, Val called me, wanting to come over and hang for a while. Oliver walked in then, me feeling self-conscious in only my bra and panties.
I told Val I’d call her back before hanging up. “Uh, what are you doing in here?” I asked Oliver, looking around for clothes to cover myself up.
He just looked at me. “Oliver,” I said looking away from him, “You’re starting to creep me out.”
“Why?” he asked, taking a few steps toward me.
“I don’t know. It’s just the way that you’re looking at me,” I said.
“How am I looking at you?” he asked, his expression blank.
“I don’t know,” I said. “Seductively, I guess. Are you trying to seduce me?”
He grinned at me, “Maybe.”
“Too bad I’m not seducible,” I responded.
He took another step towards me. He brushed his lips lightly against mine. His hand grabbed mine, trailing up my arm and down my chest. I pushed him through the hall and into his room. I tried to pull away, but he held on, not letting me go. He kissed my neck. His hands were on my waist now, caressing my body gently.
“Fine,” I said suddenly, unable to take it any longer. He pulled his head back so he could look in to my eyes. “You win. I give up.”
He gave me a smile, “I knew you would.”
“Thanks for blowing me off, Miss I’ll-call-you-back,” Val said, as I headed into her house. After my run-through of last night, I crept out of Oliver’s bed, so as to not wake him and drove over to Val’s house. “There better be a damn good reason for the cancel last night, she said as we headed up the staircase to her room.”
“Oh, trust me, it’s good,” I said as soon as we got into her room and I had shut the door behind us.
She took one look at my face and rushed over to me, pulling me down beside her on her bad. “Spill! I want every single detail, from beginning to end!”
“Well…” I said, building suspense.
“Shit, Jade you’re killing me! C’mon! Did you do it with him or not?”
“I guess you could say we fumbled around a little,” I said shrugging, trying to keep a straight face.
Val got up and started jumping around, doing a little victory dance. “Oliver and Jade did the na-na!” I blushed and pulled her back on the bed.
“Please stop, you’re embarrassing me,” I told her.
“How are you not freaking out?” she asked me.
“I don’t know,” I said, honestly confused about the whole thing. “I don’t think it’s hit me yet.”
My phone chimed as soon as I finished my sentence. My eyes bulged open. I looked down and sure enough it was Oliver. His picture lit up my phone. I stared at it for a minute and thought about pressing the ignore button. “Answer it,” Val said. I rolled my eyes and pressed the green answer button.
“Hello?” I answered, not knowing what to expect from the other side.
“Hi,” Oliver’s voice sounded like he had just woken up. “So last night, when I fell asleep there was a beautiful girl in my bed and today, when I awake, wanting to see her beautiful face, all I see is an empty bed. Have you seen this girl around anywhere?”
“Yeah I think I might have seen her once or twice today,” I played along.
“No, but seriously,” Oliver said, “Where did you go? Why did you leave?” he asked.
I tried to think of something off the top of my head that would sound legitimate. “Val’s car broke down so I came and helped her out.”
“Oh, well does she need someone to come over and fix it?” he asked. “Do you know what’s wrong with it?”
“Uh, no, no it’s-it’s fine. Her dad is fixing it as we speak,” I looked at Val. She was looking at me like I was crazy. “Hey, um, I gotta go.”
“Okay, well will I see you tonight?” Oliver asked.
“Possibly, but I’m not sure why?” I asked, wondering what’s going on.
“Just wondering,” Oliver said quickly. “Bye Jade.”
“Bye,” I said, hanging up.
“Why did you lie?” Val asked me as I layed back on my back and stared at the ceiling.
“I don’t know. I didn’t want to tell him that I ran away. That’s embarrassing. He’ll think I’m a little kid.”
“Well, it’s not like it was your first time or anything, damn, calm down girl,” Val said, getting up and heading out of her room and down the stairs.
I got up and followed her, “But, it was our first time! I mean, that’s sort of a big deal especially since we aren’t actually dating or anything like that,” I told her as we entered the kitchen.
“So, you’re telling me you’ve never hooked up before?” Val gave me a look.
“Yes, once! But this is different. I knew I was never going to see that guy again, this guy I see every day and he lives with me. Not to mention, he’s my step brother!” I said, adding emphasis on the right words.
“True,” Val said pondering this, “Do you think you guy’s parents will approve?”
“Probably not, I mean, if they find out about this,” I shook my head. “Who knows what would happen.”
Val thought some more before responding. “Okay, so how long have you guys been hiding this?”
“Um, almost a month,” I said, checking over the dates in my head.
“And has it been hard?” she asked me.
“Well I suppose not,” I said trailing off. “But I still don’t want to take that risk.”
“Do you even like him?” Val asked bluntly.
I didn’t understand what she meant by this thought, “Yes, of course. I like him I mean, what am I doing if I didn’t.”
“No, I mean, like-like him, not just as fuck-buddies,” Val grabbed a Vitamin Water out of the fridge and threw me one too.
“We aren’t fuck-buddies. We did it once!” I said.
“Just answer the question,” Val said.
I thought about it for a second before I answered, wanting to be sure of what I’m saying. “I don’t know. I mean, I just broke up with Hayden It feels like yesterday and I’m still not used to him being out of my life. I don’t think I could bring anyone else in, without him completely gone. But yeah, I guess I kind of like-like Oliver,” I paused, “I don’t know what it is, but something is holding me back from him. And I haven’t figured it out yet.”
“Well what do you think it might be?”
“I’m not even sure. It could be Hayden or our parents. But something is telling me it’s something else. And I know he feels it too because I can tell.”
“Maybe it’s something from his past,” Val suggested.
“Or someone,” I said. “Probably Natasha.”
“Wanna go to the gym?” Val asked, grabbing her keys out of her purse.
“Sure. I could work off all the junk food I ate from the breakup,” I rubbed my tummy. Val let me borrow some shorts and a tee and we headed to the gym down the street.
“So who’s Natasha?” Val asked when we were in her car.
“His last ex. She cheated on him he informed me the other night,” I told her.
“Dang, well you both have a lot in common, huh?” Val asked. She elbowed me and gave me a look. I shoved her a little and laughed.
When we got to the gym I jumped on the treadmill and turned it on full speed, hoping to work away some confusion and figure out what I really wanted.
“Wine cooler?” Oliver offered to me when I walked in from work last night.
I shrugged and took it from him. “Thanks,” I headed to my room.
I took a quick shower and got out, ready to climb into bed. I’d worked so hard this week. I felt exhausted. In the middle of changing, Val called me, wanting to come over and hang for a while. Oliver walked in then, me feeling self-conscious in only my bra and panties.
I told Val I’d call her back before hanging up. “Uh, what are you doing in here?” I asked Oliver, looking around for clothes to cover myself up.
He just looked at me. “Oliver,” I said looking away from him, “You’re starting to creep me out.”
“Why?” he asked, taking a few steps toward me.
“I don’t know. It’s just the way that you’re looking at me,” I said.
“How am I looking at you?” he asked, his expression blank.
“I don’t know,” I said. “Seductively, I guess. Are you trying to seduce me?”
He grinned at me, “Maybe.”
“Too bad I’m not seducible,” I responded.
He took another step towards me. He brushed his lips lightly against mine. His hand grabbed mine, trailing up my arm and down my chest. I pushed him through the hall and into his room. I tried to pull away, but he held on, not letting me go. He kissed my neck. His hands were on my waist now, caressing my body gently.
“Fine,” I said suddenly, unable to take it any longer. He pulled his head back so he could look in to my eyes. “You win. I give up.”
He gave me a smile, “I knew you would.”
“Thanks for blowing me off, Miss I’ll-call-you-back,” Val said, as I headed into her house. After my run-through of last night, I crept out of Oliver’s bed, so as to not wake him and drove over to Val’s house. “There better be a damn good reason for the cancel last night, she said as we headed up the staircase to her room.”
“Oh, trust me, it’s good,” I said as soon as we got into her room and I had shut the door behind us.
She took one look at my face and rushed over to me, pulling me down beside her on her bad. “Spill! I want every single detail, from beginning to end!”
“Well…” I said, building suspense.
“Shit, Jade you’re killing me! C’mon! Did you do it with him or not?”
“I guess you could say we fumbled around a little,” I said shrugging, trying to keep a straight face.
Val got up and started jumping around, doing a little victory dance. “Oliver and Jade did the na-na!” I blushed and pulled her back on the bed.
“Please stop, you’re embarrassing me,” I told her.
“How are you not freaking out?” she asked me.
“I don’t know,” I said, honestly confused about the whole thing. “I don’t think it’s hit me yet.”
My phone chimed as soon as I finished my sentence. My eyes bulged open. I looked down and sure enough it was Oliver. His picture lit up my phone. I stared at it for a minute and thought about pressing the ignore button. “Answer it,” Val said. I rolled my eyes and pressed the green answer button.
“Hello?” I answered, not knowing what to expect from the other side.
“Hi,” Oliver’s voice sounded like he had just woken up. “So last night, when I fell asleep there was a beautiful girl in my bed and today, when I awake, wanting to see her beautiful face, all I see is an empty bed. Have you seen this girl around anywhere?”
“Yeah I think I might have seen her once or twice today,” I played along.
“No, but seriously,” Oliver said, “Where did you go? Why did you leave?” he asked.
I tried to think of something off the top of my head that would sound legitimate. “Val’s car broke down so I came and helped her out.”
“Oh, well does she need someone to come over and fix it?” he asked. “Do you know what’s wrong with it?”
“Uh, no, no it’s-it’s fine. Her dad is fixing it as we speak,” I looked at Val. She was looking at me like I was crazy. “Hey, um, I gotta go.”
“Okay, well will I see you tonight?” Oliver asked.
“Possibly, but I’m not sure why?” I asked, wondering what’s going on.
“Just wondering,” Oliver said quickly. “Bye Jade.”
“Bye,” I said, hanging up.
“Why did you lie?” Val asked me as I layed back on my back and stared at the ceiling.
“I don’t know. I didn’t want to tell him that I ran away. That’s embarrassing. He’ll think I’m a little kid.”
“Well, it’s not like it was your first time or anything, damn, calm down girl,” Val said, getting up and heading out of her room and down the stairs.
I got up and followed her, “But, it was our first time! I mean, that’s sort of a big deal especially since we aren’t actually dating or anything like that,” I told her as we entered the kitchen.
“So, you’re telling me you’ve never hooked up before?” Val gave me a look.
“Yes, once! But this is different. I knew I was never going to see that guy again, this guy I see every day and he lives with me. Not to mention, he’s my step brother!” I said, adding emphasis on the right words.
“True,” Val said pondering this, “Do you think you guy’s parents will approve?”
“Probably not, I mean, if they find out about this,” I shook my head. “Who knows what would happen.”
Val thought some more before responding. “Okay, so how long have you guys been hiding this?”
“Um, almost a month,” I said, checking over the dates in my head.
“And has it been hard?” she asked me.
“Well I suppose not,” I said trailing off. “But I still don’t want to take that risk.”
“Do you even like him?” Val asked bluntly.
I didn’t understand what she meant by this thought, “Yes, of course. I like him I mean, what am I doing if I didn’t.”
“No, I mean, like-like him, not just as fuck-buddies,” Val grabbed a Vitamin Water out of the fridge and threw me one too.
“We aren’t fuck-buddies. We did it once!” I said.
“Just answer the question,” Val said.
I thought about it for a second before I answered, wanting to be sure of what I’m saying. “I don’t know. I mean, I just broke up with Hayden It feels like yesterday and I’m still not used to him being out of my life. I don’t think I could bring anyone else in, without him completely gone. But yeah, I guess I kind of like-like Oliver,” I paused, “I don’t know what it is, but something is holding me back from him. And I haven’t figured it out yet.”
“Well what do you think it might be?”
“I’m not even sure. It could be Hayden or our parents. But something is telling me it’s something else. And I know he feels it too because I can tell.”
“Maybe it’s something from his past,” Val suggested.
“Or someone,” I said. “Probably Natasha.”
“Wanna go to the gym?” Val asked, grabbing her keys out of her purse.
“Sure. I could work off all the junk food I ate from the breakup,” I rubbed my tummy. Val let me borrow some shorts and a tee and we headed to the gym down the street.
“So who’s Natasha?” Val asked when we were in her car.
“His last ex. She cheated on him he informed me the other night,” I told her.
“Dang, well you both have a lot in common, huh?” Val asked. She elbowed me and gave me a look. I shoved her a little and laughed.
When we got to the gym I jumped on the treadmill and turned it on full speed, hoping to work away some confusion and figure out what I really wanted.