The Roof

Vanessa made her way back to the food court to meet back up with Gissy. Her friend was sitting at the booth near the smoothie place. Strangely enough, she was sitting with the guy who she had bumped into earlier.

“Hey...” Vanessa said awkwardly as she approached the table.

“Oh hey, I was just talking about you.” Giselle said after taking a sip of her smoothie. “I was just telling John about how I was staying at your house so I could see his concert.”

So this was the concert she had wanted to go to.

“Hi, I’m Vanessa.” She extended her hand to the boy. He shook it twice and gave her a smile.

“John.”

“Oh, Gissy, I just got an application to that new record store. I am actually really stoked. It seems great.” Vanessa didn’t want to edge John out, but it made her feel more comfortable pretending she wasn’t talking in front of some stranger in a band.

“You mean Sound Garden? I work there!” John said ecstatically. “You will love it. I mean it’s pretty nice to work there.” His tone shifted from one of excitement to one of neutrality.

“Oh, cool. Well Gissy, we have to go, I have to pick up Sam. Nice meeting you John.”

“Like-wise. Hope to see you soon.”

Vanessa was far too awkward for all of this. She had no idea how to talk to guys, much less attractive guys. Vanessa didn’t even know how to communicate with people half the time.

As they reached the car, Gissy said, “what is your problem Van? He was trying to be nice, but you kept shutting him down.”

“I’m sorry ok? You know I don’t do well in stressful situations, and I would consider this to be a stressful situation.”

“You are going to have to get over it if you ever want to have a real relationship that lasts longer than a few weeks.”

That stung. Vanessa had a tendency to become infatuated with boys only to have them leave her. She thought the roof could help their relationship, but it hardly ever did.

“I am sorry, ok? What do you want from me?”

“Let’s just go.”

Vanessa was confused by her friend’s sudden outburst. It wasn’t her fault she had to pick up her brother. Was that why she was mad? Or was there some unconscious anger that she had. Vanessa knew better than to press, so after the abuse, she let it go.

Vanessa dropped her off and went to the skate park to pick up Sam. She honked her horn twice, but it didn’t seem to get his attention.

She got out of the car and made her way to the half pipe.

“Samuel Jacob Martin Luther King Jr. I have been waiting for five minutes now. Come on.” She yelled to her brother. Vanessa earned some stares of wonder and second hand embarrassment. She had a tendency to give him extra middle names when she was angry. And sometimes the occasional slip of a historical figure was added.

One kid walked up to her and apologized for keeping him.

“Sorry. I was asking him how to do a sweet trick. I’m Pat by the way.”

“Vanessa. Which trick?”

“He called it the ‘Uncle Sam.’ It was pretty sick.” Vanessa gave her younger brother a knowing look.

“Really, the ‘Uncle Sam’? That’s the best you could possibly come up with? I am disappointed. You see Pat, I taught my little brother here everything I know. That trick is actually called “The Van.”

“Let’s see it.” Pat said to her with a small smile. He was two years younger than her, her brother’s age.

Vanessa made her way to the half pipe. She grabbed her brother’s skateboard and helmet. She executed the move with balance and coordination.

“That is how you do ‘The Van.’ We have to get going though. Sam, say good bye.”

“Bye.” Sam mumbled under his breath. He hated how his sister was better at most things than him. He always felt insignificant compared to her. If he only knew how much Vanessa wished she was as happy as he was.

Once they got in the car and shut the door Vanessa started to speak.

“Did you have fun?”

“I did until you showed up. Why do you always have to ruin everything?”

Vanessa had seemed to be getting that a lot today. She would make people upset without even trying or doing anything outwardly hurtful. She didn’t understand her own emotions, much less that of others.

“I’m sorry, ok? I am sorry. I am sorry I wanted to have forty seconds of fun doing something I used to love to do. I shouldn’t have stolen your spotlight, and I am sorry. Even though I taught you, you have perfected the moves and made them your own. So I am sorry for acting out like that.”

The thing is, Vanessa knew Sam was slightly over reacting. She knew he would forget about it in the morning. But she some how felt obligated to apologize to make him feel better now. She was always trying to appease people. Vanessa just wanted to make people happy, and it hurt her to see that she could hardly ever do so.

“Whatever.” He remained silent for the rest of the car ride. When he got out he slammed his door and ran inside. Vanessa picked his skating gear up and put it in the garage. She made her way up the stairs and into her room so she could go on her roof. It was the one place where she didn’t hate herself or have to pretend to be someone she’s not.

On the roof she was just Vanessa.