Finally Free?
Justice Recieved?
He flicked the ashes from his cigarette into the bowl she’d placed on the table. The only light in the small living room came from the infomercial on the TV. He’d muted it though. The noise made his head hurt at this hour. The blinds were pulled shut, the lights were all off, and the old slider doors had all been pulled shut. He wanted to be left alone. In some ways, he’d rather be back in jail right now. He shivered at the thought and closed his eyes.
Why had all that happened to him? Before he’d just been like every other chump out there. He’d loved his job so much and now he couldn’t even do that. He wanted to teach. But no school would ever hire him again, even if he was acquitted. His name had been all over the press. The neighbors wouldn’t talk to him and whenever he was in public mothers guided their kids away from him.
Kenzie Mann. She was the one who started spouted those stupid lies. She was upset she was failing chemistry and convinced two other girls to lie with her. Ashleigh James and Lindsey Poole. He was shocked when he’d heard Lindsey was in on it too. She was his top student and he was so sure she’d be going on to major in chemistry one day with how dedicated she was too it.
Thank God for Ashleigh though. He’d never seen someone crack like that. On trial, she’d come right out and admitted to it all. The girls freaked out when the bailiff swore her in and poured everything out. She told the whole story. About how Kenzie had been upset about the failing grade and wanted to get back at him. She’d even told the court about Lindsey and the abusive father and how Lindsey believed Kenzie and was only trying to help get the girl out a situation she knew too well. But Ashleigh knew it was a lie. Ashleigh, who he’d never even had in his class, had an uncle who’d served an 18 month sentence because of a lie. She’d finally spoken up because she’d been sworn to honesty by that bailiff and her uncle sat there in the audience watching her.
Not that any of that mattered. He’d never teach again. He didn’t even know what he was going to do with his life now. He’d spent all the months leading up the trial in jail. They’d deemed him a flight hazard and even his own lawyer, who he could barely afford to pay, didn’t fight hard enough to get him a reasonable bail. Even in a jail people have standards, and those charged with sexual crimes are like scum. They’re only just above child and wife murderers by a smidge, a very small little smidge.
He rubbed the cigarette against the edge of the bowl and stared at the TV screen blankly. He reached for the box only to remember that’d he’d emptied it already. He let his arm fall away.
“James?” Her voice was too loud. He wished he could mute her too. No, he didn’t want that. He wished he could erase himself from her life. She deserved so much better. He couldn’t give her that perfect white-picket fence life anymore. Now, they were stuck in this ruddy apartment with less than a dime to their names in debt deeper than either of them could fix.
“Go away.” His own voice sounded lost. He didn’t recognize it anymore. Where was the voice that kept students quiet as he explained foreign topics like electron configuration and arrangement?
“What’s wrong? Aren’t you happy about the ruling? You got your justice.” She talked gently as she sat down next to me. Where was the woman who’d married him? Was she as unsure of him as he was of himself?
“Steph, I’m never going to teach again. They might as well just lock me in the slammer.”
“Love, please.” She placed a hand on his knee and he stared at it for a few minutes. What did she want? She was right. He’d gotten justice, albeit a rather delayed justice. What good did that do though?
He grabbed her hand and pulled her into a hug. He bit his lips as he felt his eyes fill with tears. What good did justice do? Because the only thing left in his life right now was her, and those months in jail had fucked up his head enough that he didn’t even feel worthy of touching her.
“I’m so sorry.” He said choking on his words. He wanted so badly to erase it all. He wanted his life back. Her life was ruined. His life was ruined. What did either of them have to look forward to now? He could never be the man she married and live up to the promises he’d made after all this.
“It’s not your fault. It was never your fault.”
Why had all that happened to him? Before he’d just been like every other chump out there. He’d loved his job so much and now he couldn’t even do that. He wanted to teach. But no school would ever hire him again, even if he was acquitted. His name had been all over the press. The neighbors wouldn’t talk to him and whenever he was in public mothers guided their kids away from him.
Kenzie Mann. She was the one who started spouted those stupid lies. She was upset she was failing chemistry and convinced two other girls to lie with her. Ashleigh James and Lindsey Poole. He was shocked when he’d heard Lindsey was in on it too. She was his top student and he was so sure she’d be going on to major in chemistry one day with how dedicated she was too it.
Thank God for Ashleigh though. He’d never seen someone crack like that. On trial, she’d come right out and admitted to it all. The girls freaked out when the bailiff swore her in and poured everything out. She told the whole story. About how Kenzie had been upset about the failing grade and wanted to get back at him. She’d even told the court about Lindsey and the abusive father and how Lindsey believed Kenzie and was only trying to help get the girl out a situation she knew too well. But Ashleigh knew it was a lie. Ashleigh, who he’d never even had in his class, had an uncle who’d served an 18 month sentence because of a lie. She’d finally spoken up because she’d been sworn to honesty by that bailiff and her uncle sat there in the audience watching her.
Not that any of that mattered. He’d never teach again. He didn’t even know what he was going to do with his life now. He’d spent all the months leading up the trial in jail. They’d deemed him a flight hazard and even his own lawyer, who he could barely afford to pay, didn’t fight hard enough to get him a reasonable bail. Even in a jail people have standards, and those charged with sexual crimes are like scum. They’re only just above child and wife murderers by a smidge, a very small little smidge.
He rubbed the cigarette against the edge of the bowl and stared at the TV screen blankly. He reached for the box only to remember that’d he’d emptied it already. He let his arm fall away.
“James?” Her voice was too loud. He wished he could mute her too. No, he didn’t want that. He wished he could erase himself from her life. She deserved so much better. He couldn’t give her that perfect white-picket fence life anymore. Now, they were stuck in this ruddy apartment with less than a dime to their names in debt deeper than either of them could fix.
“Go away.” His own voice sounded lost. He didn’t recognize it anymore. Where was the voice that kept students quiet as he explained foreign topics like electron configuration and arrangement?
“What’s wrong? Aren’t you happy about the ruling? You got your justice.” She talked gently as she sat down next to me. Where was the woman who’d married him? Was she as unsure of him as he was of himself?
“Steph, I’m never going to teach again. They might as well just lock me in the slammer.”
“Love, please.” She placed a hand on his knee and he stared at it for a few minutes. What did she want? She was right. He’d gotten justice, albeit a rather delayed justice. What good did that do though?
He grabbed her hand and pulled her into a hug. He bit his lips as he felt his eyes fill with tears. What good did justice do? Because the only thing left in his life right now was her, and those months in jail had fucked up his head enough that he didn’t even feel worthy of touching her.
“I’m so sorry.” He said choking on his words. He wanted so badly to erase it all. He wanted his life back. Her life was ruined. His life was ruined. What did either of them have to look forward to now? He could never be the man she married and live up to the promises he’d made after all this.
“It’s not your fault. It was never your fault.”