The Way We Were

That Evening...

I kissed Caleb before he left, giving him a hug and telling him to tell his family that I said 'hi'. At the same time, Chanel and Edie arrived with magazines, movies, and champagne, I had invited them over for a "girls" night, but we were actually gonna figure out what I was gonna wear tonight.

"Alright, I'll be back in maybe a week. Love you." He smiled, kissing my cheek before leaving. I shut the door after him and Chanel stood there smirking at me with her arms crossed over her chest, and Edie started to laugh.

"So, let's go find a dress." I smirked and linked arms with each of them, leading them to my closet.

I converted the guest room into a walk-in closet, since I own probably about fifty dresses, we needed to figure out what would be appropriate for tonight.

"How 'bout this? It says, 'my body is ready, take me now'." Chanel laughed, holding up a vampy red bodycon dress. I raised my brow and shook my head, "It's dinner, that's it."

She laughed to herself. Edie then held up another dress, "Well, what about this one? It's conservative, modest, it says 'you can look, but can't touch'."

I looked at it then took it from her, "Wow, I've never worn this one, the tag is still on. I like this one." I smiled, holding it up and admiring it.

"Perfect, and these sexy Louboutins will go perfect with it." Chanel grinned, holding up my black pumps. "Now I'll do your hair! and Edie will do your makeup. Come on, let's go to the bathroom."

I laughed as we walked out to the bathroom, I sat on a chair while Chanel curled my hair and gabbed about herself, keeping me in a good mood and making me laugh. Edie did my makeup, and laughed at Chanel's stories.

"So, where are you two going tonight?" Edie asked, doing a last coat of mascara.

"I'm meeting him at the Rose Bar, on the terrace." I smiled.

"Ooh, that's fancy." Chanel said in a sing-song tone.

I rubbed my hands together and tensed up. "I'm kinda nervous."

"Why?" Edie laughed.

"Because...I don't know, it's just...I miss him so much and I'm scared I'll end up expressing it too much to him and I'll scare him away and...I don't know." I sighed.

"Audrey, you're a beautiful and confident woman. You and Ryan are super close friends and you two understand each other on levels we might not even get each other on. It's gonna be great, it'll be like old times." She smiled, hugging me from behind.

"Are you sure?" I hesitated.

"Positive. Hold on, I'll be right back." She grinned, she ran out of the room and was gone for a couple minutes. Soon, the song "Material Girl" by Madonna was blaring on the stereo.

"You've got half an hour, let's dance foo'." She laughed, pulling me and Edie out of the bathroom into the living room. We began dancing around and singing at the top of our lungs and at times taking a drink from the bottle of champagne. It was all so fun, but I had to leave, so I called a taxi and danced until it arrived.

I bid adieu to the girls and told them I'd be back and we'd finish our girls night. Chanel doubted me and smirked about it, but I just laughed and left the loft.

During the taxi ride, I took deep breaths and held my Alexander McQueen clutch tightly, feeling butterflies in my stomach. I closed my eyes until I felt the vehicle slow down to a complete stop.

"Here we are." The driver said in a raspy, smoker's voice.

"Thanks." I replied, slipping a fifty dollar bill to him. I quickly went from the taxi to the lobby of the bar. I waited for the host to welcome me.

"Oh, Miss Cobain, we've been expecting you. This way please." He smiled, leading me as discreetly as possible out to the terrace. My jaw dropped when I seen the place filled with candles and magnolias, but I smiled even more when I saw Ryan get up from the table smiling back. The terrace was made private just for us. When the host left, I smiled as I slowly began walking toward Ryan, and he also doing the same.

"You look beautiful." He smiled, reaching his hands out to take mine.

"Thank you. You look so handsome." I chuckled; the butterflies now feeling seizure-ish in my stomach.

We didn't say anything for a moment, because we didn't need to. We both laughed and hugged each other. "Just hold me for a moment longer, please." I whispered, my arms wrapped around his shoulders.

"I've missed you so much." He whispered back.

I smiled as I softly let him go and looked up at him, "I missed you too."

"Should we sit down?" He asked. I nodded and stepped toward my seat. He pulled out my chair for me and seated me. I thanked him.

"So, how are you? How's life?" He asked.

I smiled and lightly laughed, "It's good. I begin filming a new movie tomorrow, I'm playing Edie Sedgwick."

"That's amazing, I'm happy for you."

"Thanks." I blushed, I cleared my throat "So what are you up to?"

"Well, I finished up the movie, 'The Place Beyond The Pines', and I'm almost done with 'Gangster Squad'. And I've signed onto a movie in Thailand called 'Only God Forgives'. That's pretty much it." He laughed.

"That's great...so I got your invitation, Hobson delivered it this afternoon. So what is 'Drive'?" I asked.

"It's a movie I'm in, it's this really cool film by Nicholas Winding Refn. It's about a driver, me, who gets tangled up with some mobsters and has to protect this woman and her son. It's really cool, and...Eva's in Paris doing a film, and I was wondering if you'd like to be my date to the premiere tomorrow night?"

I looked up at him and smiled, "I'd love to."

He smiled back and again we were silent.

"So, you and Eva. You're going pretty strong I'm guessing?" I half-smiled.

He stared down at the table and looked up at me, "We're going." He gave a short laugh. "The long distance thing is definitely wearing on the both of us."

I nodded and didn't say anymore.

"And you and Caleb?" He asked.

I closed my eyes, thinking about last night. "We're good. I guess long distance will be a factor for us too, he just left for Tennessee, and soon he'll be going back on tour."

He also nodded and didn't say anything. "Have things always been this awkward for us?"

I looked up at him and half-smiled, "Maybe things are different now because we're in somewhat serious relationships with other people."

He gave a short and light laugh, "You think?"

I just smiled.

"Remember when we were working on Blue Valentine together? And we had just filmed the ukelele scene and when they said 'cut', I just stopped and stared at you with a goofy grin. Do you remember what I said?" He asked.

I smiled and closed my eyes, "Yeah, I do."

"I said, 'I think I'm falling in love with you, no, no-'"

"'I know I'm falling in love with you'." I smiled, finishing his sentence. He smiled back and held my hand across the table.

"And I said, 'I love you too'." I whispered, looking down at our hands, at my engagement ring. I held his hand and noticed a small tattoo of a blue heart on his wrist. I smiled.

"I'm sorry I didn't come to the club the other night." He spoke.

"Yeah, where were you?" I chuckled, looking up at him.

"I just, I didn't know if I could contain my emotions when I saw you, especially when there'd be a lot of people there." He answered.

"That's really sweet...I'd much rather meet you in this setting than at a crazy club." I softly smiled.

Then we heard someone clearing their throat, he looked past me and I looked over my shoulder. The host stood there looking eager holding two menus. Ryan motioned him to come over.

"Here are your menus, can I get you two some drinks?" He asked.

"I will have a white wine please." Ryan replied, "And she'll have-"

"An iced tea please." I grinned. I caught them both off guard and Ryan started to laugh. "Actually, that sounds really good. I'll have one too, instead of the wine."

"Right away." The host sheepishly smiled and soon left.

I smiled at Ryan and we both started laughing.

"I missed this." He chuckled.

"Same here." I laughed, opening the menu. "I wonder if they have burgers."

He laughed even more.



We got to the ranch at about ten in the evening, Matt picked up Jared, Nathan, and I from the airport. He said that Garrett was at the house visiting, so that made me more excited to come home. I grabbed my bag from the back of the truck and walked up to the house, feeling the loose gravel beneath my feet, hearing some laughter from inside the house.

I dropped my bag in the foyer and walked into the living room; our mom shot up from her seat and expressed her excitement by screaming and giving us a big hug. I laughed and greeted everyone else, hugging my old friend Garrett.

I excused myself to go put my bag upstairs in my room, so I left upstairs and walked down the hall. I heard the bathroom door open but didn't care to look until I heard a soft and feminine voice call my name. I froze. Cautiously I turned around and sheepishly smiled at her.

"Hey Lily, I didn't know you were here." I half-smiled.

"Yeah, I've been visiting with your family, with Garrett of course." She smiled, walking slowly up to me.

"That's nice...it's been awhile hasn't it?" I nervously laughed as she approached me.

"Yeah, it has." She smiled.

"You look good." I swallowed hard.

"Thank you." She held out her arms to hug me, so politely I tried to give her a quick hug, but she embraced me a little more than I had anticipated.

"I missed you." She whispered.

I hesitated and closed my eyes, "...I missed you too."