The Way We Were

September Tenth

I had spent all morning and most of the afternoon outside socializing with Caleb's family. His extended family from Talihina, Oklahoma have come out to Tennessee for a slight reunion and for the wedding. Ryan had called me earlier and I gave him the directions to the ranch.

It was a warm day, so I decided to take Caleb's younger nieces and cousins out for a nature walk, just a stroll through the orchard and into the fields. The little girls made quick friends with my own nieces, Florence and Lucia. The all took turns holding my free hand and pulling me along, as in my other arm I carried Calogero. This also gave me the much needed time to think about my future, regarding children.

I love kids, I really do. I have this special bond with my nephew Calogero, Rosalie and Mauro's youngest. He's special, I'd always find the time to visit with the kids, but it always end up being me and him, as he was a cute little boy who wanted me all to himself.

Calogero is four years old already, they recently enrolled him in a private pre-school. He's a shy little boy and has difficulty with words, well, in English anyway. Mauro and Rosalie have been speaking to him in Italian and now it's more like his first language. He talks to me in Italian. I love him more than he'll ever know.

If I could have a child exactly like him, then that would be enough for me. But I needed to tell Caleb that now wasn't the time. And as cute as a little Followill would be, running around, terrorizing the house, murdering our cats, and giving me white hair; I wasn't ready for that sort of responsibility. I took the kids back to the house, but they dragged me out to the dock.

"Are you gonna push me in?" I laughed as the kids surrounded me. They all started laughing as they tried to push me with their small strength, and purposefully I "fell" into the water.

They all broke into hysterical laughter as I swam back up to the top of the water, "Calogero, come swim with me." I smiled as I held out my arms to him. He giggled as he cautiously climbed into my arms. I held him as I swam out a little and played with him.

"Ti voglio molto bene, Calogero." I smiled, kissing his forehead. I told him that I love him very much.

"Ti voglio zia." He giggled, wrapping his arms around me.

"There she is." Caleb laughed, standing at the edge of the dock with Ryan and Eva.

"Ryan, Eva. I didn't even know you were here!" I laughed, swimming back with Calogero.

"Isn't she gonna be a great mom?" Caleb laughed, punching Ryan's shoulder.

"Here, can someone take Calogero?" I lifted up my nephew.

"Here I got him." Caleb smiled, picking him up.

Calogero began squirming as he reached out to Ryan. "Zio Ryan!"

Ryan smiled as he took little C in his arms. "And how is my favourite nephew?" He tickled his stomach and scruffed up his hair. I climbed out of the water and stood up to greet Eva and Ryan.

"Oh he is adorable! Is he your nephew?" She smiled.

"Yes indeed, his name is Calogero. C, say hello to Eva." I smiled.

He looked at her and nodded his head, "Salve." She started to laugh and continued to remark how cute he was.

"His parents have been trying to assimilate him and get him to speak more English, but he's very stubborn and prefers Italian I guess." I smiled, stroking his hair. I looked up at Ryan who smiled down at me.

"Well c'mon, the food is almost ready, and in the mean time I'll introduce you to the family." Caleb said, ushering us toward the party.

"I'm just gonna go change into some dry clothes, I'll be right back." I chuckled, going into the house.

After quickly changing, I came back out to hear the classic tunes of Lynard Skynard in the background with the large party of people around the bonfire. When I had found a seat next to Caleb, I leaned in and kissed him softly on the cheek.

"This is really nice. Our families together, getting along. I seriously thought they'd clash and my family would shrivel up and burn." I laughed, making a few others around me laugh too.

"This is nice." Caleb smiled, wrapping his arms around me. I rested my head on his shoulder. "You were really good with the kids today."

I just smiled. After a while after nothing being said, I thought that now would be an okay time to tell him.

"Caleb, I'm not entirely ready to have kids...right away I mean." I looked down.

He started laughing, "I know, me either. I mean, I've got seven months of touring, and you're busy filming movies. We'll have start a family when we're both ready."

I gave a sigh of relief and smiled, kissing him again. "Oh I'm so relieved. I thought you wanted kids right away!"

"I do, but waiting is better." He smiled. He kissed me back.

"Thank you." I smiled.

"But I'm supposed to be watching the barbecue, I'll be back." He laughed, getting up. Nikolas quickly took his place. "So, I couldn't help but eavesdrop, but is everything settled?"

"We're gonna wait when it comes to kids." I sighed again, smiling.

"Cool. But you do know it's sort of a race now? Between you, me, and Daniel. Who will have the first born between us." He smirked.

"Yeah, like Chanel's gonna let that happen. She's expressed on several occasions that she does not want children." I whispered with a short laugh.

"Well then I guess it's between you and me now." He laughed. "It'll probably be me."

"Yes, but it has to be a boy." I grinned.

"And I'll make sure of that." He shrugged his shoulders, lightly laughing with an evil grin on his face.

"What has to be a boy?" All of a sudden Ryan sat next to me, startling me.

"Dogs! A dog...I am in the market for a dog." I cleared my throat, nodding my head.

"Oh...that's nice." I smiled.

"Bye." Nikolas laughed, leaving his seat.

I turned to Ryan, "How are you? I haven't been really able to talk with you for a long time."

"I'm good...I miss you." He looked down.

"...I miss you too...do you wanna go for a walk?" I half-smiled.

"Yeah, let's go."

We got up and walked through the crowd of people and made our way to the orchard. It was nice to have this one-on-one time. It was just like old times, laughing and joking around with each other. I missed this. The sun had started to set as we were making our way back, but as usual, we were pushing each other around and play-fighting. I had tripped backwards and bumped into a tree, leaning against it laughing. He smiled as he took a couple steps toward me.

"Are you okay? Did you bump your head?" He chuckled, reaching out, stroking my hair.

"Yes and yes." I laughed. He outstretched his arms and rested his hands against the tree on either side of me. We were both silent as we carefully watched each other.

"We should get back." I simply spoke. I pushed past his arms and walked past him back through the last stretch of orchard.

Back at the bonfire, everyone was in good spirits, laughing and conversing with each other. I walked around until I found Caleb. He pulled me onto his lap, "We're gonna have some music now."

"Oh really? Who's playing?" I asked, looking around. My question already answered as I saw Nikolas and Daniel with their guitars.

"Nik, Dan is just an accompaniment."

I watched Nikolas tune his guitar until he took a seat on top of a picnic table. He quickly tested the strings before clearing his throat. "Uh, I'm Nikolas and this is my brother Daniel, in case some don't know us, we're Audrey's brothers. Um, I've been writing songs for as long as I can remember and i thought I'd play one for my dear sister and future brother-in-law. The lyrics have nothing to do with marriage, but it's a good song." I lightly laughed.

He nodded to Daniel as they began playing a song he called 'Waiting.'

"A coma might feel better than this,
attempting to discover where to begin.
You're weighed down, you're full of something.
Of sickness, and desertion.
You're weighed down, you're full of something,
you're underneath it all.

So say goodbye to love,
and hold your head up high.
There's no need to rush
we're all just waiting, waiting to die..."

Everyone started clapping as I grinned, clapping and cheering for them. I stood up and went to hug them. "Nik, that was incredible! You cease to amaze me!"

"Thanks." He chuckled. He hugged me back and kissed the side of my head. We walked back to our seats as others took the "stage" and performed for us.

The sky grew dark as the stars began blinking all over. I looked up and watched them, not realizing I was being talked to.

"Huh? What?" I looked back at Caleb. He started to laugh, "They want the bride to play a song."

"Oh, okay." I laughed, standing up, being greeted with clapping and cheering. Even a few people called out, 'play free bird.' I just laughed as I borrowed Nik's guitar. I took a seat on the table and thought for a moment of what I wanted to play.

"Okay, I've been playing around with one of my slightly older songs and I made an acoustic version. This will be the first time I play it; this is 'The One That Got Away.'"

I began picking the strings, playing the first part, going into the rest of it:

"Summer after high school when we first met
We make out in your Mustang to Radiohead
And on my 18th Birthday
We got matching tattoos

Used to steal your parents' liquor
And climb to the roof
Talk about our future
Like we had a clue
Never planned that one day
I'd be losing you

In another life
I would be your girl
We'd keep all our promises
Be us against the world

In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away

I was June and you were my Johnny Cash
Never one without the other we made a pact
Sometimes when I miss you
I put those records on

Someone said you had your tattoo removed
Saw you downtown singing the Blues
It's time to face the music
I'm no longer your muse

But in another life
I would be your girl
We'd keep all our promises
Be us against the world

In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
The one...
The one that got away

All this money can't buy me a time machine
It can't replace you with a million rings
I should've told you what you meant to me
'Cause now I pay the price

In another life
I would be your girl
We'd keep all our promises
Be us against the world

In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away
The one...

In another life
I would make you stay
So I don't have to say
You were the one that got away
The one that got away."

While everyone cheered and clapped, I looked out to Ryan who also was clapping. He smiled and I smiled back.