When I'm With You, I'm at Home

Ashton's POV-

A couple days passed since the announcement. John has stayed away, with his own discretion. He didn't want to be around me, when I’m with Brian. I couldn't blame him, but I missed him.

*

I was outside tanning, while Brian was still asleep inside. I closed my eyes, trying to get some peace of mind.

"Hey Ashton." Rang in my ears. I was relieved when it was John’s voice.

"John." I smiled, pushing myself up off the ground.

"Is it safe to talk to you?" He questioned, lifting a brow.

"Yes," I rolled my eyes, while I walked over to the fence.

"Where's Brian?"

"He's still sleeping."

"I miss you." John muttered, as he peered down at the ground.

"I miss you too."

"Can't you sneak away from Brian for awhile, so we can hangout?"

"Actually, I'm going out with Brian tonight." I began. "I was thinking you could come to. Well, meet me there."

It took only a few seconds, for his reply. "How? I'm not allowed around you two."

"If we're at the club it would be easy to sneak off. I miss you John. I want to see you, for more than two minutes."

"I want to too." He replied. "I'll go."

"Good." I smirked.

John reached out to touch my face, but I immediately stepped back. John sighed deeply, and brushed back his hair. "This is getting hard for me."

"It's hard for me to, John."

"But you-"

"Ashton." Brains voice shouted from behind me.

His voice pierced my ears, sending shock waves throughout my body. I took my time turning around to face him. When I saw his dark charcoal eyes, I knew he wasn't happy.

"Hey Brian." I forced a smile.

"What are you doing, baby?" He asked, walking up to me, slipping his hands around my waist.

"Just talking."

Brian looked up at John. "Jake was it?" He said, recalling a quick introduction at the party.

"John." He replied flatly.

"Oh. I was close." Brian chuckled. "Well, Ash why don't we go back inside?"

I nodded at Brian, not risking a word to John.

"Nice seeing you, James." Brian smiled up at John.

"John." He hissed, while he watched Brian and I walk away.

•••

I put on my best I’m ready to party act, as Brian pulled me along. I continuously slammed in to people, while I fought to keep up with Brian’s pace.

Of course, we ended up at the bar. I couldn't drink, because I knew Brian would be. While Brian took several dark colored shots, I looked around to see if John was here yet. I took around an hour until I finally spotted John.

John was wandering around, beer in hand. He seemed a little tipsy. I could tell by his walk. He glanced over, connecting our eyes.

Later, John began dancing with some skanky brunette. The situation made me uncomfortable. I knew I had no right to feel this way, when I was openly with Brian, which John hated.

Brian leaned down to my ear, and whispered, "I'll be back." He left a wet kiss on my cheek, which was seen by John.

John rolled his eyes, and grabbed the brunette. He leaned down, and kissed her roughly. I closed my eyes and swallowed a lump in my throat. When I reopened my eyes and looked at John; he was pulling away from her, and peeking over at me.

I feverishly leaped off the bar stool, and stormed over to him, grabbing his arm, and dragged him to an empty hallway.

"Why would you do that?" I asked him, with audible hurt lingering in my words.

He began to pace back and forth. Refusing to make any eye contact. "It was just a kiss. What's the big deal?"

"I didn't like it." I mumbled.

"It didn't mean anything. I was angry. I wasn't thinking."
He stopped pacing and looked at me. "I never want to hurt you." He said making his way to me. "But it hurts me to see you with Brian. Everyday, I have to watch you two, and act like I'm okay with it. But I'm not, at all."

I looked at my feet. I didn't know what to say to him. Everything I do just ends up hurting him anyways.

John sighed, and puts his hands on my waist. "He knows there's something between us, and it scares him, that’s why he acts that way when I'm around." He said.

"It's fake." I breathe.

"If it was all fake you wouldn't be marring him. It wouldn't matter if it were fake anyways… It still kills me." John choked out.

"I'm sorry."

"I hate when you kiss him in front of me." John whispered, shaking his head in disappointment.

"John, I'm sorry." I shouted. I had to yell, or I would cry.

"You better get back to him. He is probably looking for you." John said, kissing my forehead. "Ill be at the bar if you need me." He smiled at me, softy, and began to walk away.