You're Not Invisible
prologue.
Prologue
Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush, any songs/lyrics, or any of the characters, etc.
Oh, when the lights go down in the city
You'll be right there shining bright.
You're a star and the sky's the limit,
And I'll be right by your side.
Oh, you know, you're not invisible to me.
Oh, you know, you're not gonna be invisible.
-Big Time Rush, "Invisible"
Being the sister of a famous popstar is not all it's cracked up to be. Sure, there's the perks like free tickets and advanced copies of albums. And it didn't matter so much when I was still a little kid, or just always at the Palm Woods and when I went to the Palm Woods School. Everyone there was either on their way to being famous or, like me, famous in their own right (I was in a commercial or two. But everyone knew I was only famous because I was Kendall Knight's sister and had done interviews about my brother and stuff).
But the Palm Woods School was absolutely no good when I reached high school. For starters, I knew all the kids there, and they were all super annoying because they were actually famous for a reason and thought I didn't deserve to be there. Not that kids at a normal, regular school weren't annoying too, which, when they found out who my brother was, they were more annoying than the Palm Woods kids, but still. I'd rather be fawned over and used because of Kendall than looked down on and used because of Kendall.
After 1 year, my freshman year, at the Palm Woods School, I put my foot down. I was 15, and the boys of Big Time Rush were 21 (Mom wouldn't stand for them living alone even when they were 18). We didn't need to live at the Palm Woods anymore. The boys practically didn't. They were on tour, across America and all around the world nearly 365 days a year. So we should move, and I should be able to choose what school I wanted to go to.
Most people would be happy with a school where there was barely any work, homework, or learning in general. My brother Kendall and his posse (well, except maybe Logan who, before becoming a famous popstar, wanted to be a doctor. But popstar duties won out over a legit education) sure didn't care that they weren't going to a real school. In fact, I was originally the one who had begged my mom to let me go there. My mom had to work her butt off to get me in a flipping commercial when I was 10 so I could be considered "famous" and go. But like I said, I could only take so much from those kids there, kids I had known since I was 10, but who, in high school, suddenly didn't consider me "worthy".
And I wanted to be famous at first. Well, scratch that, I wanted loads of money; still do. But I never wanted to be famous as in famous like my big brother.
My brother and his best friends Logan, Carlos, and James--who were also more-or-less my brothers, seeing as I lived in an apartment with them for, oh, I don't know, 5 years, and when you live with people that long, you certainly get to know them. The thing was, though, I knew them, even though they were gone so much, because that's how fame works, but they didn't know me like they should have. Kendall and I used to be so close, when I actually had someone in the world, before Big Time Fame took over. My mom and I just moved into a little apartment in L.A. near both the Palm Woods and Rocque Records while the boys stayed in good ol' 2J, so she could "watch" them when they were here yet let them "have their space"--aka Big Time Rush, had a great time being famous. But it wasn't for me--even though, like I said, by default I was--and sometimes I resented the fact that they were, because it pretty much ruined my life without me even having a say.
I loved Kendall more than anything, and I was so happy he was happy--and even, for that matter, Carlos, James, and Logan--but it meant that I wasn't really happy, that because he was happy I was utterly depressed and alone. I had no real friends, because everyone just used me to get close to Kendall and the boys (especially girls. They're all: "Oh my GOD, you're KENDALL from BIG TIME RUSH'S sister?? Oh my GOD, you HAVE to get me a date!!" Even though these girls are, you know, underage, and BTR are, you know, legal adults. I mean, James, the womanizer of the group, wouldn't mind. And Carlos probably wouldn't mind either--my brother and Logan had girlfriends though).
At first when I meet people it's fine: Knight is a pretty common name, and my brother and I share virtually no resemblance. Where Kendall is fair and blonde with green eyes, I am tan skinned with dark brown eyes and medium-dark brown hair. It's always: "Your last name is Knight? Wouldn't that be so hilarious if you were related to Kendall Knight from Big Time Rush?" and I'm always just like: "Yeah, it would..." And I never say whether I am or not, but they always find out anyway. Maybe they went home and googled Kendall's life, or youtubed old BTR interviews I was featured in. Somehow they always found out, even though our last name is really the only thing that linked us.
When Kendall wasn't busy being a popstar, we could be best buds. Sometimes I even got to come along. Not while I was in school, and not as much as when I was 10 and 11, but honestly, I lived for tagging along on my brother's popstar adventures. Hanging with the boys I'd grown up with was the only time I didn't feel utterly alone anymore, the only time I even semi-belonged. Even though I usually just sat or stood there while they were performing, at least it was better than being home alone.
Because I'd faced the facts long ago. I couldn't have any friends outside of my brother and his friends. Because being hopelessly alone was so much better than being used, abused, and thrown around.
Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush, any songs/lyrics, or any of the characters, etc.
Oh, when the lights go down in the city
You'll be right there shining bright.
You're a star and the sky's the limit,
And I'll be right by your side.
Oh, you know, you're not invisible to me.
Oh, you know, you're not gonna be invisible.
-Big Time Rush, "Invisible"
Being the sister of a famous popstar is not all it's cracked up to be. Sure, there's the perks like free tickets and advanced copies of albums. And it didn't matter so much when I was still a little kid, or just always at the Palm Woods and when I went to the Palm Woods School. Everyone there was either on their way to being famous or, like me, famous in their own right (I was in a commercial or two. But everyone knew I was only famous because I was Kendall Knight's sister and had done interviews about my brother and stuff).
But the Palm Woods School was absolutely no good when I reached high school. For starters, I knew all the kids there, and they were all super annoying because they were actually famous for a reason and thought I didn't deserve to be there. Not that kids at a normal, regular school weren't annoying too, which, when they found out who my brother was, they were more annoying than the Palm Woods kids, but still. I'd rather be fawned over and used because of Kendall than looked down on and used because of Kendall.
After 1 year, my freshman year, at the Palm Woods School, I put my foot down. I was 15, and the boys of Big Time Rush were 21 (Mom wouldn't stand for them living alone even when they were 18). We didn't need to live at the Palm Woods anymore. The boys practically didn't. They were on tour, across America and all around the world nearly 365 days a year. So we should move, and I should be able to choose what school I wanted to go to.
Most people would be happy with a school where there was barely any work, homework, or learning in general. My brother Kendall and his posse (well, except maybe Logan who, before becoming a famous popstar, wanted to be a doctor. But popstar duties won out over a legit education) sure didn't care that they weren't going to a real school. In fact, I was originally the one who had begged my mom to let me go there. My mom had to work her butt off to get me in a flipping commercial when I was 10 so I could be considered "famous" and go. But like I said, I could only take so much from those kids there, kids I had known since I was 10, but who, in high school, suddenly didn't consider me "worthy".
And I wanted to be famous at first. Well, scratch that, I wanted loads of money; still do. But I never wanted to be famous as in famous like my big brother.
My brother and his best friends Logan, Carlos, and James--who were also more-or-less my brothers, seeing as I lived in an apartment with them for, oh, I don't know, 5 years, and when you live with people that long, you certainly get to know them. The thing was, though, I knew them, even though they were gone so much, because that's how fame works, but they didn't know me like they should have. Kendall and I used to be so close, when I actually had someone in the world, before Big Time Fame took over. My mom and I just moved into a little apartment in L.A. near both the Palm Woods and Rocque Records while the boys stayed in good ol' 2J, so she could "watch" them when they were here yet let them "have their space"--aka Big Time Rush, had a great time being famous. But it wasn't for me--even though, like I said, by default I was--and sometimes I resented the fact that they were, because it pretty much ruined my life without me even having a say.
I loved Kendall more than anything, and I was so happy he was happy--and even, for that matter, Carlos, James, and Logan--but it meant that I wasn't really happy, that because he was happy I was utterly depressed and alone. I had no real friends, because everyone just used me to get close to Kendall and the boys (especially girls. They're all: "Oh my GOD, you're KENDALL from BIG TIME RUSH'S sister?? Oh my GOD, you HAVE to get me a date!!" Even though these girls are, you know, underage, and BTR are, you know, legal adults. I mean, James, the womanizer of the group, wouldn't mind. And Carlos probably wouldn't mind either--my brother and Logan had girlfriends though).
At first when I meet people it's fine: Knight is a pretty common name, and my brother and I share virtually no resemblance. Where Kendall is fair and blonde with green eyes, I am tan skinned with dark brown eyes and medium-dark brown hair. It's always: "Your last name is Knight? Wouldn't that be so hilarious if you were related to Kendall Knight from Big Time Rush?" and I'm always just like: "Yeah, it would..." And I never say whether I am or not, but they always find out anyway. Maybe they went home and googled Kendall's life, or youtubed old BTR interviews I was featured in. Somehow they always found out, even though our last name is really the only thing that linked us.
When Kendall wasn't busy being a popstar, we could be best buds. Sometimes I even got to come along. Not while I was in school, and not as much as when I was 10 and 11, but honestly, I lived for tagging along on my brother's popstar adventures. Hanging with the boys I'd grown up with was the only time I didn't feel utterly alone anymore, the only time I even semi-belonged. Even though I usually just sat or stood there while they were performing, at least it was better than being home alone.
Because I'd faced the facts long ago. I couldn't have any friends outside of my brother and his friends. Because being hopelessly alone was so much better than being used, abused, and thrown around.
♠ ♠ ♠
No, this doesn't mean I'm not updating SAYW, I just HAD to get the idea that was in my head out. I know, I know I shouldn't have started another one. But seriously, I loved this idea I had. Plus, a Jatie, practically my favorite pairing (besides JamesxMe, jk :p)! And, I don't really know how far is too far yet to go with Katie's "issues" (see if you can guess) that will pop up. Like, not with detail, but I'm debating whether to have her less unstable than I do right now... but for now, enjoy!