Sweet Misery

I liked Saturday afternoons. They were usually spent at either Kennedy's, Pat's, or my house. The guys would come over and we would watch movies, play video games, write music, and talk about chicks. It was nice. Peaceful, in fact. I looked forward to Saturday afternoons all week long.

This particular Saturday afternoon was spent at Kennedy's house. His parents were currently out of town, so John brought over a couple packs of beer. We all sat on the couch in Kenny's living room, some of us sprawled out on the floor, our friend Halvo on the love seat in the corner messing around with his phone. Just as we started the movie The Sixth Sense, Kennedy came in and tossed John and I a bag of chips. John grabbed it viciously, opening it and taking the first handful of chips.

Despite the pleasant regularity of it all, I found myself miserable. Well, maybe not miserable, but preoccupied. I constantly checked my phone, waiting for Harley to text or call me. I had told her to do either of the two sometime this weekend so we could hang out. Normally, I would have just called her, but I realized I was the only one doing any of the planning. I figured if she was the one to actual call and make the initiative, that maybe, just maybe, she was interested in me. That makes sense, right?

"Stop checking your phone like a little girl, sheesh." John ordered, food present in his mouth.

Pat snickered, "He's waiting for Harley to call."

Kennedy, who sat on the floor in front of me, looked up, 'She's coming, though."

The room fell silent, "What?" I asked, my stomach dropping.

"Yeah," Kennedy sat up straight, "I invited her."

"You did?" I swallowed hard.

He nodded his head, "She should be here pretty soon. I told her three o'clock."

John took a swig of his beer and patted me on the shoulder, "Hey, maybe you can make a move this time. Take her upstairs."

My heart sank at the mere thought. I ignored him, falling to the back of the couch and sucked in a deep, calming breath. It's okay. John won't hit on her with me right here. It's okay. I bit my lip as the clock ticked on. She was fifteen minutes late, which normally would have made me laugh, but this time it didn't. I tapped my fingers anxiously on my knee, not paying attention to the movie whatsoever. All I was aware of were the sounds outside. I waited to hear the sound of her car pulling up, her feet coming to the door, the knock.

I was too busy thinking about her getting here that I hadn't hear the knock on the front door. Kennedy shot up, and I found myself standing up as well. Kennedy's dog, Jax, ran to the front door, barking. I followed Kennedy to the front door and as I did so, I heard snickers from behind me. I held up my middle finger to them as I walked out into the foyer.

When Kennedy opened the front door, Harley immediately crouched down and greeted Jax. "Aw, hey boy." She cooed, rubbing his ears and petting him. She looked up, smiling at the two of us, still petting the dog. "Hi, guys."

We said hello, but I knew that the two of us were distracted by something painfully obvious. Harley wore a white, extremely, extremely, tight tank top that clung to her entire upper torso. Over it was a small, light weight, blue cardigan that didn't have the pleasure of covering her up whatsoever. Instead, the three of us-yes, including the dog-had the most wonderful opportunity of seeing right now her shirt and viewing, her, uh, breasts.

Her crouched down and fawning over the dog didn't improve the situation either. I was too engulfed with her perfect breasts that I couldn't even find any ounce of annoyance that Kennedy was staring too. We just stood there, dumbfounded and drooling.

Finally, she stood up and I was able to register that she was wearing black jeans. It didn't matter though. I could still see her boobs.

Kennedy swallowed, "Uh, the guys are in the living room. You can go on in."

She nodded her head, "Okay."

As she moved out of the foyer, Jax following her, I grabbed Kennedy's sleeve and turned to him. "Holy shit. I can't do this."

Kennedy's face washed over with red, "You know John is going to be all over that."

"I know! Fuck. I mean, those are the nicest boobs I have ever seen. God." Normally I hated talking about Harley in this way but at this point in time I really couldn't help it. All I could think about was me taking her upstairs and climbing on top of her and taking that shirt off. I pictured her wrapping her long, lean, bare legs around me. I found myself wondering what it would be like crashing into her over and over and over again.

Kenny ran a hand through his hair. His cheeks were red and no doubt so were mine, "We're just going to have to come up with a strategy here. You sit next to her and I'll sit on the other side. Try to keep John away."

I nodded my head, "Okay."

The two of us walked into the living room but came to a dead stop once our feet hit the carpet. Harley already sat sitting up straight on the couch next to John. John leaned forward and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Although her face was beat red and her eyes were on the television screen, John didn't really seem to get the message. His eyes were clearly where Kenny and I's had been moments before.

I swallowed the knot in my throat and walked over to the couch, sitting down next to Harley. Her tense shoulders relaxed lightly as I took the seat, and my shoulder gently brushed against hers. A sense of comfort and fulfillment rushed through me. She was okay with me. She was comfortable next to me.

"So this is what you guys do when you're not playing?" She leaned over and whispered to me.

I could barely answer the question. She was the closest she had ever been to me; I could smell her sweet shampoo and make out the perfect green her eyes held. I also had the perfect capability of viewing the inside of her shirt, but I decided against it. I found myself staring at her soft, pink lips and wondering what they tasted like. After a moment, I snapped out of it, nodded my head and shrugged, "Pretty much."

Suddenly, the television turned off abruptly. John stood up and declared, "I say we do something different for once."

Everyone sort of just look at one another.

John groaned, rolling his eyes in process. "Come on. We'll play a game."

"I have Monopoly in my room..." Kennedy began.

"No, like a drinking game or some shit."

Jared shrugged, "Beer pong?"

And that is how we decided to play beer pong. We all piled into Kennedy's fairly small kitchen and lined up the cups properly. I carefully explained the rules to Harley because she had never played before. As she went for her first time, Kennedy took me by the sleeve and pulled me back.

"He's planning on getting her drunk."

I made a face, "I hate thinking about him so negatively." I muttered.

Kenny sighed, "I know but John around girls is a different John. Go take Harley upstairs and make a move."

My stomach twisted and everything told me not to do what was suggested. Still, I found myself nodding my head, taking a swig of beer and leaning over into Harley's ear and whispering, "Wanna go upstairs?"

Surprisingly, she nodded her head, unphased. I grabbed her a bottle of beer, as well as one for me, and followed her up the stairs. As each step came, I felt a little more nauseous. I let out a shaky breath as we found ourselves on the second floor. I walked towards Kennedy's room and let Harley in. She walked in and glanced around. She then sat down on the bed and looked at me.

I wanted to be like every other guy in the world. I wanted to make her swoon and tackle her to the bed and kiss her like I was able to with every other girl I had ever went out with. I wanted her to be on top of me and I wanted to be on top of her. I mean, fuck, this was my perfect opportunity, yet here I was, frozen in place. Reluctantly, I closed the door behind me and rubbed my sweaty palms together. I took a sip of beer from the bottle and swallowed it cautiously.

"I'm not really a fan of beer pong." I explained.

She nodded her head, understanding, "I don't think I am one either."

"You know," I walked over to her, "I got an eighty five on my Romeo and Juliet test."

As I took a seat next to her, our thighs touching, a large smile extended across her lips. "Really?! Nice job! I'm so happy for you." She laughed.

I scratched the back of my head, "Well, I'm happy for you. There's no way I would have passed that test if it weren't for your help."

She shrugged, "I don't know about that. I only told you my opinion of the play; not really anything about it."

She continued to talk on about the play, but I mainly ignored her. Instead, gaining some courage, I settled my hand on her knee, then moved it up her thigh. She stopped in her tracks, staring down at it and letting out an, "Uh."

My face heated up instantly. I wanted to rip my hand away but at this point I found it quite hard to do so. She turned her head away from me altogether, almost as if she was planning to ignore it. Just as I was about to pull it away, she took hold of it, her cold fingers lightly pressing into my palm. She turned it over and looked at it intently.

"See this line?" She asked, tracing her fingers over an wrinkle on my palm.

I nodded my head carefully.

"It's called the heart line in palm readings. It deals with your emotions regarding love. Your capability to love and to be loved. Yours is long and curved and doesn't start under any of your fingers. That means that you give your entire self to love without any costs," She stopped and laughed lightly for a moment, "you have a very romantic nature and warmth to your actions."

I nodded my head, amused, then laughed. "Wow. You know all that?"

"I have a book on it."

I took hold of her hand and turned it so the palm was upright. "And what about you? What's your heart line say?"

Her face fell lightly, "I have a heart line that starts in between my middle and index finger. It basically means I don't understand anything about love and that I'm going to give my heart away to someone easily."

I made a face and shook my head, "I don't think that's true."

She raised her eyebrows, "That's what the book says."

I shrugged, "Yeah, but you're smart and independent. You're not going to be stupid and give your heart away to someone worthless. You'll know better."

When she didn't respond, I took her hand gently and squeezed it, "You're not Juliet."

Her eyes flickered up and connected with mine. She then placed a hand on my cheek and smiled softly. Her hand fell as she said, "Thanks." We stayed quiet for a little bit, looking at each other's palms. I found her consistently tracing her finger over my heart line over and over again. After several moments, she stopped abruptly and looked up.

It happened too quick for me to even notice. She sat up straight and gently kissed my cheek. As she pulled away and once again looked down at my hands, I found my cheeks radiating heat. I bit back the inner smile inside of me.

The two of us settled at the top of Kenny's bed and put on The Discovery Channel. We ignored the shouting going on downstairs as the afternoon soon turned into night. At about six o'clock, Harley fell asleep and her head rested on my shoulder. I settled into the bed next to her, my eyes getting drowsy from watching some show on Antarctica for too long. At about six thirty, Kennedy came into the room. Just as he was about to say something his eyes fell on the two of us. I watched as a grin presented itself across his lips. He held a thumbs up and then walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Three years. It took me three years to get to where I was right now. And truth be told, it was worth it.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Fuck!"

My eyes whipped open the second I heard the profanity slip out of the girl next to me's mouth. She was sitting up on the bed, pounding the keys on her cellphone. She then looked over at me, her eyes wide, "It's eleven o'clock."

I sat up straight, scratching my head, "Dammit."

She rubbed her head, "My Mom is going to be so pissed." She raised the phone to her ear and waited until a voice on the other end picked up. She then proceeded to tell the woman to calm down and reassure her that she was fine. "I fell asleep at Tessa's. I'm fine. Mom, I'm fine. I'm sorry. I know. I'm sorry."

Harley looked at me, covering the speaker end of the phone, "Do you think Kenny would be okay with me staying the night?"

I shook my head, "That's what I'm doing. I'm sure he'll be okay with it. His parents are out of town."

She nodded her head, then turned back to the phone. "I'm sorry, Mom. I'm just going to stay here tonight. I know. Sorry. Goodnight. See you tomorrow." She hung up the phone and let out a heavy sigh.

She then fell onto her back, her head landing in my lap. She smiled up at me like an idiot. "So you're obviously going to stay up with me all night, right?"

I raised an eyebrow, "I am?"

"Well, duh! That's what happens at sleepovers. Don't tell me guys don't stay up all night eating and talking about girls."

"Girls stay up all night talking about girls?" I asked, grinning.

She sat up straight, letting out a laugh. "You know what I mean."

"Wanna go downstairs?" I asked, "I'm sorta hungry."

"Me too. Let's go."

The two of us traveled downstairs, laughing with each other at pretty much nothing. However, that laughter came to a halt by the time we actually got downstairs. The place was vacant but loud music came from the outside. I raised an eyebrow, took hold of Harley's hand and walked towards Kennedy's back door.

Upon walking outside, Harley and I were exposed to a huge party going on outside. The two of us looked at each other, confused, then looked back at the party.

Harley examined the entire backyard, "I guess Kennedy invited a few friends over."