We Can Dance in Death Tonight

"hey Matt, I'm leaving my house now. I'll be in around 3. don't worry about picking me up. I have a car picking me up. I have some things to do. but I'm excited to see you!" she smiled "alright. bye!"

"you miss them don't you?" I asked, she nodded. I grabbed her hip and pulled her closer to me, hugging her. "I'm kinda gonna miss you" I whispered.

"I'm kinda gonna miss you too. but its only four days. and you'll be busy in the studio, so it'll be okay" she smiled. I leaned down and gently pressed my lips to hers "I'll be able to think clearly too. it'll be good for the both of us"

"COME ON SAM! YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE!" TJ yelled. I sighed, kissing her again.

"ALRIGHT THORN JINGLE!" she yelled back, and I laughed.

I carried her bags downstairs and went outside to put them in the SUV as she said goodbye to TJ, Ryan, Angelo, Shay and Ella. Ricky, Chris and Abbey we're dropping her off. Ricky said he had some things he wanted to talk to her about before he left, so I decided to stay here. Chris, Ricky and Abbey got into the car and Sam came outside and walked over to me, wrapping her arms around my waist.

"have fun" I told her, hugging her back. "text me when you land"

"have fun in the studio" she smiled, and kissed my cheek.

everyone stood outside as they drove away.

-Sammy-
Chris and Abbey sat in the front seat and had their own conversation going on, so I turned to Ricky.

"what's going on?" I asked, confused to as why he was coming along.

"its about Shay. she like, shut herself down the other day. she stayed at Ella's, wouldn't answer my texts or calls. I called Ella and she told me she was at work and she was home alone. so I went to the apartment and she wouldn't even open the door. today was the first time I saw her in two days, and she won't even talk to me" he told me, and I sighed.

"she does this. she'll get to know a guy, fall for him, but freak herself out. she'll keep telling herself all these things to the point where she'll shut down and think about it constantly. she's scared of getting hurt, apart from all the shit she's been through in past relationships, she's seen what I've been through. when you get back to the house, I want you to take her up to her room, and just lay in bed with her for a little while. show her you aren't going to hurt her and you're going to be there for her no matter what"

"does she think I'm just going to fuck her over?" he asked

"possibly. you never know what's going on in that head of hers. you just need to tell her straight up how you feel, take her out on a date, make sure she feels wanted. tell her your plans with her and show her she can trust you. but so help me god Ricky Olson, if you fuck with her and hurt her, I will kill you" I threatened, he just giggled at me.

"here" Abbey said, choked up.

we got outside and they walked me to the gate. I hugged Chris goodbye, telling him good luck in the studio. he told me to have fun. I hugged Ricky.

"text me how it goes" I told him, he nodded

"thanks for being my best friend Sam. I'll see you in a few days" he smiled, kissing my cheek "text me when you land" I nodded. I hugged Abbey, and we both started to get a little teary eyed.

"oh girls, stop it. you'll be back together in four days" Chris rolled his eyes. "Sam, you better go. you're going to miss your plane"

"bye. I love you guys" I smiled, and walked onto the plane.

Upon landing in California, my smile grew and I felt like the Cheshire Cat. I walked off the plane and out of the gate, feeling the heat of flashes hit me. you could never get some damn privacy.

"Sammy! are you staying in Cali for good now?!" someone yelled at me.

"No, just visiting some friends!" I told him. they began to get closer "please leave me alone" I pleaded. they kept following me and getting closer. I started to get annoyed and one got right up in my face and snapped a picture, so I pushed him onto the floor and took off my sunglasses "I said leave me alone"

they fled off to another area and started snapping pictures of someone else. I took a death breathe in, calming myself down. I found the carousel I needed and tried to find my bag.

"looking for this?" I heard, one of my favorite voices ever. I turned around and Matt stood there with my bag next to his feet. "hi Sammy" he smiled.

"MATTY!" I yelled, jumping on him and wrapping my legs around him. "ugh, I've missed you"

"we've missed you too honey. I know you told me not to come get you but I figured it wasn't a proper welcome home if you had to drive yourself home. the car is at the house, so you can do what you planned a little later" he smiled. he let me down but turned around "hop on"

I jumped on his back and he grabbed my bag. I laid my head down on his huge shoulder. we walked in silence to his huge SUV and he put me down. I jumped in and put on his favorite song on my ipod. he got in and laughed, hearing Barbie Girl. I remembered when Matt would sing this all the time and then Jimmy got mad and threw the CD out of the window.

"how are you?" I asked, looking out the window.

"we're all making it through each and every day. it's hard, but he wouldn't want us upset. you?" he asked.

"trying my hardest" I mumbled. "how were you not attacked by the paps? by the way, a cop might come to the house, I pushed one down" he laughed.

"I screamed Mario Lopez and pointed to some mexican that looked like him and they ran over to him" I laughed. "welcome home"

I got out of the car and opened the huge doors, the guys and girls all sitting on the couch watching tv.

"I wonder when they're getting back! Matt was supposed to text us when he was on his way home" Brian complained.

"why? where'd Matty go?" I asked, all their heads snapped back and they yelled upon seeing me. I was bombarded by hugs and kisses.

"welcome home sweety" Val hugged me "we made your favorite!"

"why thank you! I'm gonna go shower" I told them, they all nodded. I walked upstairs to the guest bedroom and sat on the bed, dialing Josh's number.

"hi babe" he said into the phone, I smiled.

"hi"

"how was the flight?" he asked.

"considering I'm not a huge fan of planes, horrible" he giggled. "is it possible to miss your laugh already?"

"yeah, I kinda miss yours"

"ew, listen to us, we sound like a fucking newlywed couple. let's fix this. you're a huge asshole" I laughed.

"and you're a huge bitch. better?"

"much!" I smiled. I heard someone knock and Zacky's head pop in. "oh hey Z"

"I figured you might need this" he smiled.

"oh, thanks!" I put the phone to my ear "hey, I'll call you a little later. bye"

"have fun" I hung up. Zacky walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me.

"We've really missed you Sam. all of us" he smiled "especially me"

"I missed my best friend too" I looked away.

"so how's it in P.A?" he laughed.

"fucking cold compared to here. I don't know, I mean it's nice, quiet. eventful" I laughed.

"whose the boy?"

I slowly began to spill my guts to Zacky. I missed our talks.

-Balz-
"hey guys, Sam's on TV" Ryan yelled. everyone gathered in the living room and saw on TMZ how Sam was walking through the airport, and than pushed one of the camera men on the ground. we all laughed.

"why's she being attacked by papz?" TJ asked. Shay and I giggled a little.

"she's a huge fucking deal in Cali" Shay snickered "how did none of you know that?"

"why?" Angelo asked.

"there are few female tattoo artists. she's one of the all time best tattoo artists around. she's tattooed so many famous people it isn't even funny. TV spots, interviews, magazine spreads. not to mention she's best friends with the guys from Avenged Sevenfold and loads more bands. she's pretty big" Abbey added.

"damn. we've got a fucking celebrity on our hands" Ricky said.

"why didn't she tell us?" I asked.

"that's not the type of person she is. she doesn't walk around going "hey, I'm Sammy Smith. my brothers Telle Smith. I'm a world famous tattoo artist and my best friends are Avenged Sevenfold. not to mention I know basically every band known to earth" Shay commented.

"true" Chris mumbled.

-Sammy-
after Zacky and I talked, I turned on the TV and saw myself on TMZ. I silently cursed at myself and started to get ready for dinner. my phone rang and I quickly answered it.

"ALL HAIL THE FAMOUS SAMMY SMITH!" I heard TJ yell. I sighed.

"you guys saw that huh?" I mumbled.

"fuck yeah we saw that! you're motherfucking famous as shit! we would've never expected it from such a quiet girl" Ryan said.

"alright, enough guys. out! let me talk to her alone" I heard Josh yell. they all yelled goodbye "was I not good enough to know you're fucking famous as shit?"

"it isn't a big deal Josh. I don't even like it. why do you think I moved away from it. I hate the papz following me around like I'm some kind of rockstar when all I do is fucking tattoo people and play in a local band. big deal, I know some huge names in the music industry, but I'm not the type of person that enjoys this attention"

"you're right. I was just shocked. how's it in Cali?"

"great, but uh I'll talk to you later. I have to go see someone before dinner" I whispered.

"Austin?" he asked. I knew it was harmless.

"Jimmy" I mumbled, I heard him 'oh' in the background. "yeah, I'll call you tomorrow"

"stay strong baby. I'll talk to you soon. night" I hung up and grabbed my purse.

When I walked downstairs, I saw the few beers that the guys had already began to drink. I shook my head.

"where are the keys to the rental?" I asked. Matt took keys out of his pocket and threw them at me. "I'll be back in an hour"

I got in the car and drove to the place I dreaded so much. I parked and got out, seeing the few fans walking away. I knew the guards weren't going to let anyone else in, so I didn't have to rush. I sat down and placed my hand right where his heart would be. tears were already flowing out of my eyes.

"I'm so sorry Jimmy" I whispered. "I wish you were still here. I miss you so much. I need you so bad right now. I'm in a pickle" I giggled, knowing how he'd laugh after I said that "this isn't fair. you didn't deserve this! you were such a kind hearted guy. you should've lived until you were 80. maybe even longer. I miss your fucking laugh so much. not to mention those god damn blue eyes. It wasn't fair what you did to us. you shouldn't have fucking called me and told me that, you should've came to my house and told me. I just wanted to hug you goodbye one more time. that's all I wanted! all I need. some fucking closer from you. I know this sounds so fucked up, but I know you knew you weren't going to wake up. why else would you give me your favorite fucking pair of drumsticks and your necklace. we're all trying so hard Jimmy. the guys wrote a killer album. I still can't listen to some of those songs, especially the ones your wrote, that your voice is on. I just need your arms around me and you telling me everything's going to be alright" I felt a cold breeze flow through. "that isn't good enough Jimmy. a cold breeze is not good enough. I need you. I want you back!" I wiped my eyes "the fans still care. I just saw two of them walk away crying. I still get fans come up to me and ask me how I do it. how I go on without you. you had a family. and not just us, but a family around the world that care about you, that love you, that miss you"

I laid down and rested my head on the stone. I continued to whisper until it started to get a little dark and I heard my phone from the car ringing, probably Matt wondering where I was.

"bye Jimmy. I'll be back when I come to visit again. I love you Jimbo. I miss you so much"

as I got up and started walking to the car, it started to pour. I looked up into the sky and heard thunder.

"yeah Jimmy, you laugh"