The Wind Blows

The lids of her pale green eyes slowly lifted to be met with the early morning sun. It's vibrant light pouring in through the blinds, hitting her pink skin with such potency. Her bones were weak, and sore, and the lids of her eyes were heavy with the need to stay shut, as she forced them open.

She was lying flat on her stomach amongst the blankets, with the warm sheets gather around her bare hips, and the air from the nearby vents striking her skin, and setting chills across her back. She shivered at the feel, as her head leisurely rose from the pillow that she'd been resting her heavy head on - letting her squinting eyes roam the space surrounding her.

She could feel her chest constrict around the beating of her heart, as her soft eyes drifted over to the boy who was sleeping so soundly beside her. She could feel the weight of his arm draped over the skin of her back, as she heard the subtle breaths that his lungs were taking, escape through the tiny opening between his lips.

Her body settled back down into the comfort of the cotton bedsheets, and the warmth of being so close to him - letting the side of her face fall back against the pillow case, as her eyes focused on the small, subtle breaths that he continued to take.

And after a while of laying there, with nothing but the morning silence consuming her ears, as she took in the details of every feature on his face, she watched him begin to stir - slowly, and gradually awakening, as she held her breath when she felt the weight of his arm subconsciously begin to tug her warm skin deeper into his. He groaned softly as he stretched his long limbs beneath the covers, and pulled her hips closer to him.

He was barely awake, with his green eyes still sealed shut, as he nestled the side of his face deeper into valley of his pillow, and released a heavy breath from the part between his lips. She watched his shoulders fall as all tension dissolved from there surface, and his sleepy eyes slowly lifted open to be hit with the early morning sun. But that small smile that was tugging on his thin lips made an instant drop, like heavy weights, once his green eyes adjusted to the bright light, and he was able to notice the face that was staring back at him through his hazy thoughts.

He just continued to stare into the softness of her tired eyes, with his arm continuing to hug her body tightly against his. The innocence in her face was putting a slight pain of guilt within the pit of his gut.

"Morning," she mumbled softly between her teeth - blinking several times as she let her eyes drift away from his, avoiding the stare that was bound to break her if she gazed for too long.

There was a slight quietness roaming through the air, until John's voice finally cracked the surface in a rough, groggy tone, "I'm surprised you stayed."

Her green eyes made a direct path up to his, and she caught the small smile that was barely noticeable on his lips. She shrugged her shoulders, denying herself that any thoughts of escaping his apartment before he'd awaken had ever passed her mind.

"What makes you think I'd leave without saying goodbye?"

He let his heavy eyes fall deeper into hers, as he made a vague shrug, having no real answer, "I don't know…I guess that's just what I'm used to."

She made no attempt to question him on what he meant, but instead mad a nod of her head against the pillows surface, as she continued to lie flat on her stomach, with her arms tucked beneath her body.

"So you remember last night then?" She questioned.

He gave her a slight confused expression - cocking his brow with a slight smirk on his mouth.

She laughed softly, and shook her head in need of rephrasing the question, "I mean - you seemed to be pretty drunk. I - I guess I'm surprised you remembered, and that you're not freaking out - or telling me to get out of your bed."

She laughed, and he smiled softly as the sunlight hit the green in his eyes, causing them to appear more blue in that moment. But when his small smile faded moments later, along with his contagious laugh coming from his lips, she knew there was something more than what happened last night clouding his mind.

He continued to run the tip of his calloused finger up, and down the soft skin of her back in a consistent line, as she let a subtle breath pass through her lips - knowing what was about to come from his words.

"It's just - I'd really like to know why you came to me last night," he spoke softly, and carefully, inching his body a little closer in order to close any distance set between them, expecting her to pull away, but felt a sense of relief when she didn't, "Who made you cry like that?"

She closed her eyes, feeling the back of his knuckles brush across her cheekbone, before opening them again, suddenly terrified to speak, because what she had to say was something that she didn't want him to hear.

She swallowed hard, before trying to find the words amongst the silence, "John - I - I really think it's best that we didn't talk about it right now."

His brows pulled together with a slight pain of betrayal set in his heart, as his fingers moved away from her face, and away from her skin all together, "You do trust me…don't you?"

She rolled her eyes, and laughed almost bitterly at his unnecessary question, "Do you think I would've let things get as far as they did last night if I didn't trust you?"

He shrugged his shoulders faintly, as he propped his head up on the ball of his fist.

"I don't know - you were a mess, and highly vulnerable. I think we both could've easily said yes to anything last night," he laughed softly with a smirk on his lips, watching her grumble - mumbling obscenities beneath her breath, as she lifted the pillow from beneath her before placing it over her head in discontent.

"Come on Dani," he lifted the pillow away from the girl, throwing it aside, and catching the softness of her eyes peering faintly up at him.

He leaned back down - sinking into the warm bed, and wrinkled sheets, letting his head fall next to hers, as the tips of his fingers brushed a fews stray hairs from around her face.

"Just tell me…please?" He whispered softly, and lightly kissed the peak of her shoulder, causing her to smile slightly at his poor attempt of getting her to cave.

"I hate you," she mumbled, and he laughed into her warm pink skin, with the daylight creeping further into the room, and through the cracks between the blinds.

"Tell me something I don't know."

She grabbed the sheets that were gathered in a heap around her waist, and pulled them up, high enough to cover her chest, as she shifted to lie facing him, on her side.

Her heavy eyes drifted from his for a moment, as she struggled to collect her thoughts that were causing her to feel slightly dizzy inside her cluttered head.

"Kenny came over," she anxiously bit the skin of her bottom lip with her teeth, "- yesterday morning. I - I'm not sure why I thought things would be different this time," she laughed softly - almost in regret, before her eyes traveled up to meet a pair of greens ones.

"Can we not talking about it," the sound of just his name leaving her tongue was enough to make her feel like forgetting, "please?"

He could sense the strain in her words, and slight tremble of sadness in her voice, as he pushed his fingers into the depths of her hair, letting his palm gently rest along the side of her face. He simply nodded his head at her request, not needing to take the conversation any further when he already knew how it probably ended.

She smiled softly, and whispered a soft, "Thank you," in return.

His breath was hot against her face, as he pressed his thin lips into her forehead with a simple kiss to her soft skin. She smiled faintly, closing her eyes just for that moment before reopening them to peer directly into the deepest part of his.

She took in a breath, noticing the subtle freckles along the bridge of his nose that had been brought out from the exposure of sunlight during the summer time on the beach. She subtly grazed her fingertips over the surface, and watched his eyes close briefly from the simple touch.

She kissed the tip of his nose, before shifting further down within the wrinkled sheets, so that her face was nuzzled into the warmth of his chest, and she could feel his lanky arms fold around her body.

She could feel his breath hitting the top of her head, with nothing but silence overtaking their senses as he rubbed soft circles into her skin. The room was consumed by nothing, but the morning quiet, and a small reminder of how comfort could be found in the most unexpected places.

He squeezed his eyes shut, as he pulled her closer, until his body was hugging hers.

"I'm so glad I have you." He mumbled softly into the depths of her hair, with a slight weakness in his voice as he released a shaky breath that was weighing down on his heavy heart.

**

The massive rumble that violently shook the Arizona night sky, sent chill across her skin as the wind began to wisp through the thick air, and within her hair. It was 2:00 AM, and she was having a hard time finding sleep - finding her thoughts as another crack of lightening ran like veins up above. She wrapped her small arms tighter around her legs, pulling them closer against her chest as she sat in silence on the porch swing - the only sounds coming from the rain that was pelting down on the concrete, and roof top that was shielding her above.

"Anna?"

Her pale blue eyes slowly shifted to her right, catching a small glimpse of the boy who was standing in the slight darkness, with half lidded eyes, and hair that was the epitome of bed head. He stretched his long arms above his head, as he watched the lonely girl from the small distance that was set between them.

"What are you doing out here?... I woke up, and you weren't there."

She shrugged her shoulders meekly, as he placed a seat beside her, watching her as she observed the rain that fell from the sky above.

"I couldn't sleep," she mumbled between her lips, before letting her tired blue eyes travel upward to him. He reached out to touch her face, but she managed to lean away before his skin met hers. He tried once more to reach out and touch her, but she pulled herself away, leaving the seat empty beside him as she stood on her feet, and turned so her back was facing the rain.

His face pulled together with hurt, and confusion as he peered up at the girl who was staring downward at her feet. She appeared scared, and hurt, and he wasn't sure why. Her arms were hugging her body tightly, as another crack of thunder caused her to jump slightly at its sudden burst of sound.

He stood to his feet, towering over her small self, like always, but not intimidating her in the slightest bit. She was still avoiding his stare in the dark - trying hard not to crack from his heavy gaze.

"I've been thinking a lot lately," she rolled her lips together to subside their dryness, before she swallowed the lump in her throat, and continued, "Maybe it's time we let this go," there were tears building in her eyes as she peered up at him through their blurriness, "- that we let go of each other, and move on."

There was silence, nothing but rain pouring against the ground, no words - nothing but silence, before his frustration got the better of him, and he grabbed her by the arm to gain any attention that he was seeking.

"What - what are you talking about?"

He was panicking. The way that his words shook as they left his lips, and his breath hit her face in rough patterns, told her that he was suddenly terrified.

"I can't think John. I can't think straight anymore," she closed her eyes tight, before she yanked her arm from his grasp, "I need some space - I need some time to think. I'm not even sure who I'm dating anymore, because you're never around, and it hurts to just thank about how you're never here when I really need you."

She peered up into his dark eyes. The beads of tears were streaming across her flushed cheeks, down her lips, and over her chin before dropping to her feet, as her heart constricted inside her tightening chest.

"What about me, huh? Do you think it's fucking easy," he gritted his teeth in frustration, as he gripped her shoulders with the tips of his fingers - pushing her back into the porch railing, "I can't even focus when I'm out there, and you're here by yourself. It makes me sick to think that I can't give you what you deserve, and I'm sorry - I'm so fucking sorry you feel this way - but I don't think it's time or - or space that you need."

His warm breath was rough against her face, as he looked her dead in the eyes with frustration, and heartache weighing down on his emotions. She tried to step away, but he had her trapped, with no escape, and nowhere to run.

She watched as the salty tears began to glaze over his eyes in the dim light, and the grip on her shoulders gradually loosened, before falling away completely.

"I know you're confused - and scared, but I swear - I promise to you that there is no one else that will make you feel less alone, whether I'm here, or not - I promise," he pleaded almost hopelessly, grabbing her hand that hung by her side, and pulling her tiny fingers up to his thin lips, "I need you Anna."

He kissed her soft fingers, before pulling her body into his chest, and holding her as closely against him as he could. Her fingers coiled around the soft threads of his shirt, as the tears soaked its fabric, and she shivered as she released a shaky breath into the thick air.

She could feel his thin lips pressing into the strands of her hair, as the rain began to subside, and all that could be heard was a slight rumble off in the distance. She listened to the consistent beating of his heart that was pressed against her ear, and the soft words that were pouring from his tongue, and striking the hollow part of her listening ear with an aching tone.

"What am I supposed to do when the best part of me is you, huh?," he whispered softly, for just her to hear - the tears still clouding the haze of his eyes, "Knowing that I won't be able to kiss, or hold you against me, I - I want you to know that it's tearing me up inside - but if that's what you want, I won't try to change your mind…not this time," he kissed the side of her face, as best he could, before letting her go, "I love you Anna - and I'm so fucking sorry that, that was never enough."