She Don't Play Nice
Three of Three
The darkened apartment made me release the breath I didn’t even know I had been holding. I was strangely relieved that Emily and Ian were in bed; I was in no mood to dish any details. I didn’t even know what details there were to give. There was no way I wasnt telling them about the kiss. Was it even a kiss? Could it be called that? I mean, I know our lips touched but there wasn't anything put behind it. I shook my head, knowing I was over-thinking the moment. He didn't want to kiss me any more than I didn't want to kiss him.
-_-_-_-
My cellphone pierced through the fragile haze that sheltered me from the harsh reality of a hangover.
“Hello?” I cleared my voice, grinding my teeth at how groggy my voice sounded.
”Amy! Hey, I hope I didn’t catch you at a bad time.” Carrie’s cheery voice floated into my ear and I found it really hard to be mad that she woke me up. Sitting up in my bed, I folded my legs Indian style and ran a hand through my tangled hair.
“No, you didn’t. What’s up hun?”
”Well Gustav and I were just having a little get together party for the team and I want you to come, we need to catch up and what better way of doing that then this?”
“I couldn’t think of anything better Carrie. What time’s the party?”
”Eight. Dress hot. We’re gunna hook you a guy.”
Gnawing my lip, I debated whether I should tell Carrie about Mike’s and my deal. It wasn’t like we were really dating or anything, but she DID have the right to know. She was one of my best friends after all. But everyone does have secrets, and this one couldn’t hurt. It’s not like anything was going to happen right?
Turning the red solo cup in my palm, my eyelids felt really heavy. My entire body trembled with the buzz of alcohol and Goose kept filling my glass back up each time he walked by. Sipping a little more of my drink, I couldn’t even taste the alcohol anymore, which was kind of disappointing. My head still swam with too many thoughts for one person, and I wanted nothing more than to drown them out, at least for one night. My last game in Detroit had been a disaster, and to top it off, I pulled a hamstring in the previous night’s game.
Running my tongue along the front of my teeth, I staggered to my feet in search of a refill. “Woah hold on there. Your glass is full. I think you’re done for the night buddy.” Small hands pushed against my chest, and my equilibrium was so off from sitting and drinking that I fell back onto the couch heavily. “Nahhh I’m good. I’m about to finish this off anyways.”
“No. you aren’t. I am.” My cup was lifted from my hands, and I watched a fuzzied familiar face throw the entire glass back. Blinking a few times, my vision cleared in time to see Amy sitting on the couch next to me. Tongue tied from the alcohol and her sudden kindness, words seemed too thick to roll off my normally smooth tongue. “You’re going to drink yourself dead. Stop beating yourself up about what happened. That game was a disaster anyways.” Amy flinched with her last sentence, and I nodded.
“You know I will. You know any of the guys would if they were me. Just leave me alone, I don’t want to be rejected tonight.” At least I think I said that. Amy’s head tilted to the side slightly before she shook her head. She must have understood me because she slid off the couch and disappeared around Francis and his new squeeze. The two of them were sitting close on the couch, Francis talking lowly into her ear, a smile growing as the girl with him nodded. My mouth went bitter at the sight of them—that was all I really wanted. Suddenly I found myself wishing I had another drink.
My entire body shook as I poured myself another drink. Everything had become an impulse. Talking to Brendan, downing his drink, sympathizing with him and coming to get another drink to distract myself from what I hd wanted to do next. As if another drink would stop that. Topping the drink off, I made my way back to Brendan, trying to think of something to cheer him up.
“Tell me what’s on your mind.” I whispered. Brendan twitched slightly at my return, his eyes still locked on Francis and the girl with him.
Everything blended into slurred words and more mixed drinks as Brendan and I got steadily closer and closer. I don’t remember who made the first move, but before I knew it, our lips were against each other’s and my body was exploding with prickles of excitement and attraction. All I wanted to do was be as close as I could to him, for Brendan to touch me and to touch him. The world seemed to swirl away just a bit, spinning around me and Brendan at the center. Grabbing my wrists, Brendan pulled me down the hall towards Carrie’s guest bedroom. A small red flag went up at what Brendan and I were about to do in there, but as his fingers pressed into my lower back as he pulled me close for one more hot kiss, all of my inhibitions melted away. Everything was us in that one moment.
My heart pounded so hard I could feel it against my temples and in my stomach, everything was falling into place how I had wanted it to for weeks, but as Amy pull away from me and trailed her lips against my neck, I knew things shouldn’t happen like this. I wanted to remember exactly what I said and how everything happened between us. Even though Amy was willing, her hands roamed up my inner thighs and I shuddered in voluntarily, yes she was definitely willing, she’d hate me even more for not stopping. “Amy. We can’t.” I chewed my bottom lip hard, trying to stick with what I knew was right no matter what my body was screaming at me to do. Amy frowned, straddling my lap. Her nose pressed lightly against mine, her blue eye locked onto my brown as she played with my hair which only seemed to cloud my thoughts now. “But why?”
“Because, we’re both drunk.” I gently lifted Amy off my lap and set her on the bed next to me.
“You seemed okay with this five seconds ago.” Amy started to glare at me, like I had done something wrong. Of course, I was the bad guy here. I always was.
“Shut up and go to bed. We’re both too drunk.”
-_-_-_-
My head pounded as my consciousness brightened at the edges, so hard that there was no graceful guidance into waking up. Last night was all one big black bar to me; I couldn’t even remember what I drank first. Groaning and running my fingers over my eyes and temples, the aching slowly subsiding for a few moments before returning full force. Rolling onto my side, I almost fell of the bed at the sight next to me. Brendan was curled up at the edge of the bed, still sheltered in sleep. Heaving a sigh of relief, I slipped off the bed trying to keep my equilibrium in balance. I knew the second I stepped one way wrong or moved to fast it’d be over.
Moving across the room, I used various pieces of furniture for balance. Pausing at the door, I looked back at Brendan, I was relieved to see he was still in his clothes, and that I was too. That didn’t really mean much, with him anything could happen. He was desperate, and desperation drove men to do stupid things. Shaking my head, I gave Brendan a little respect and didn’t slam the door. Mostly because my own head couldn’t take it.
Carrie and Gustav sat in the kitchen, cradling steaming mugs of hot coffee. “God I hope there’s more of that.” I mumbled. Carrie nodded towards a full pot of coffee as she took a sip of her own mug. Stumbling over, I poured a mug cradling it under my nose. The acidic scent gave life to the dying tendrils of my consciousness and suddenly the day didn’t seem so looming. “What happened last night?”
Gustav gave me a small grin. “I could ask you the same question. Last I saw of you, you were getting cuddling with Brendan.”
I nearly choked on my coffee. “What?” Panic surged through my veins, my heart hammering in my chest. Cuddling led to kissing and kissing led to touching. I wrinkled my nose at the thought of what touching could lead to. I tried to keep cool though and casually set my cup of coffee on the counter leaning back as smoothly as I could. “Yeah well that doesn’t mean anything.”
Carrie giggled a little, trying to cover her laugh with a cough. “Aim, I think Gustav means kissing. You two were going at it pretty good.”
I was glad I wasn’t holding my coffee; it would have been all over the floor. Shutting my eyes, I crossed my arms and dug my nails into my skin. This was wrong, very wrong. Technically I was with Commie, and to everyone’s knowledge but Emily and Ian I was his girl. “Care, that shouldn’t have happened. I’m technically with someone.”
Carrie’s eyes went wide as saucers. “What? Since when?”
I gave Carrie the quick deets, trying not to think too long or hard about what was what in this situation. “So I don’t even know if I could have cheated cause are Commie and I even in a relationship?”
Carrie patted my hand sympathetically. “Well you really aren’t in one, so technically you don’t have to tell. But you don’t want Brendan bragging about what happened, and especially what didn’t. So I think you should tell Mike.”
-_-_-_-
The sun shone lightly against the cold sky, just bright enough to lighten the dark gray that hung over the state during winter, but not enough to warm my skin. I had asked Mike to meet me at his car after practice, and he was sure taking his damned time.
“Hey.” Mike tugged me into a hug, pressing a uick kiss to my cheek. “You have a good weekend?”
“Decent. How about yourself?” Mike nodded, still holding me awkwardly in a hug. I could sense he had something that he wanted to say but didn’t want to bring up, just like I knew he knew I wanted to tell him something. I pulled away, fixing my jacket as an excuse to break the contact.
“What’s wrong? Is it about that kiss? Because I –“
“No. It’s not about that. It’s about what happened over the weekend. I feel so shitty about it, even though we aren’t even dating.” I ran a hand through my hair, really wanting a cigarette. “I was at Carrie’s party, and I drank more than anyone my size ever should in one night and I woke up in bed next to Brendan. We were clothed, and when I talked to Carrie she said he and I had gotten pretty heated with him.”
Mike coughed a little bit, trying to cover up the fact he was clearly frazzled. “Well that’s just going to give Brendan ammo now. My job’s ten times as hard now.” I gnawed on my lip, trying to organize my thoughts. Being hungover and debating with Mike was not boding well for my head.
“Amy! Why’d you leave?!”
Oh. My. God.
I spun on my heel to see Brendan standing at the gate near the Gordie Howe Entrance. He ran across the parking lot, skidding to a stop in front of me. “I just wanted to talk to you about last night, seeing as you’re single and all.” His eyes locked on mine, and I broke contact, finding it hard to look him in the eyes.
“Uhm, excuse me? You’re standing right in front of her boyfriend, and I take offense to that statement.”
“Oh bullshit Mike, I overheard Amy talking to Carrie and goose this morning. I know that yours and Amy’s relationship is a fake.”
Mike grabbed Brendan’s arm and pushed him from in front of me. Glaring, he wound his arm around my waist. “That’s exactly what I told Amy to say. We didn’t want a lot of people to know we were really dating. I mean I do have a reputation to uphold.”
Brendan looked as if he were about to explode. Hs arms shook and his fists were clenched at his sides as a path of red slowly creeping up his neck. Stepping in front of Mike, I held back the smirk as his hands fell to my hips. “Look Brendan. I’m sorry about what happened, but I’m happy with Mike so back the fuck off.”
Once Brendan stalked off, Mike whirled me around to face him. “So, how about it?”
“How about what?” I had every intention of dragging this whole thing out.
Mikes ears burned red. “How about you and I become a couple and actually get to know each other?” I let my arms fall around his neck, nuzzling my nose against his. “I think I could deal with that.”
-_-_-_-
My cellphone pierced through the fragile haze that sheltered me from the harsh reality of a hangover.
“Hello?” I cleared my voice, grinding my teeth at how groggy my voice sounded.
”Amy! Hey, I hope I didn’t catch you at a bad time.” Carrie’s cheery voice floated into my ear and I found it really hard to be mad that she woke me up. Sitting up in my bed, I folded my legs Indian style and ran a hand through my tangled hair.
“No, you didn’t. What’s up hun?”
”Well Gustav and I were just having a little get together party for the team and I want you to come, we need to catch up and what better way of doing that then this?”
“I couldn’t think of anything better Carrie. What time’s the party?”
”Eight. Dress hot. We’re gunna hook you a guy.”
Gnawing my lip, I debated whether I should tell Carrie about Mike’s and my deal. It wasn’t like we were really dating or anything, but she DID have the right to know. She was one of my best friends after all. But everyone does have secrets, and this one couldn’t hurt. It’s not like anything was going to happen right?
Turning the red solo cup in my palm, my eyelids felt really heavy. My entire body trembled with the buzz of alcohol and Goose kept filling my glass back up each time he walked by. Sipping a little more of my drink, I couldn’t even taste the alcohol anymore, which was kind of disappointing. My head still swam with too many thoughts for one person, and I wanted nothing more than to drown them out, at least for one night. My last game in Detroit had been a disaster, and to top it off, I pulled a hamstring in the previous night’s game.
Running my tongue along the front of my teeth, I staggered to my feet in search of a refill. “Woah hold on there. Your glass is full. I think you’re done for the night buddy.” Small hands pushed against my chest, and my equilibrium was so off from sitting and drinking that I fell back onto the couch heavily. “Nahhh I’m good. I’m about to finish this off anyways.”
“No. you aren’t. I am.” My cup was lifted from my hands, and I watched a fuzzied familiar face throw the entire glass back. Blinking a few times, my vision cleared in time to see Amy sitting on the couch next to me. Tongue tied from the alcohol and her sudden kindness, words seemed too thick to roll off my normally smooth tongue. “You’re going to drink yourself dead. Stop beating yourself up about what happened. That game was a disaster anyways.” Amy flinched with her last sentence, and I nodded.
“You know I will. You know any of the guys would if they were me. Just leave me alone, I don’t want to be rejected tonight.” At least I think I said that. Amy’s head tilted to the side slightly before she shook her head. She must have understood me because she slid off the couch and disappeared around Francis and his new squeeze. The two of them were sitting close on the couch, Francis talking lowly into her ear, a smile growing as the girl with him nodded. My mouth went bitter at the sight of them—that was all I really wanted. Suddenly I found myself wishing I had another drink.
My entire body shook as I poured myself another drink. Everything had become an impulse. Talking to Brendan, downing his drink, sympathizing with him and coming to get another drink to distract myself from what I hd wanted to do next. As if another drink would stop that. Topping the drink off, I made my way back to Brendan, trying to think of something to cheer him up.
“Tell me what’s on your mind.” I whispered. Brendan twitched slightly at my return, his eyes still locked on Francis and the girl with him.
Everything blended into slurred words and more mixed drinks as Brendan and I got steadily closer and closer. I don’t remember who made the first move, but before I knew it, our lips were against each other’s and my body was exploding with prickles of excitement and attraction. All I wanted to do was be as close as I could to him, for Brendan to touch me and to touch him. The world seemed to swirl away just a bit, spinning around me and Brendan at the center. Grabbing my wrists, Brendan pulled me down the hall towards Carrie’s guest bedroom. A small red flag went up at what Brendan and I were about to do in there, but as his fingers pressed into my lower back as he pulled me close for one more hot kiss, all of my inhibitions melted away. Everything was us in that one moment.
My heart pounded so hard I could feel it against my temples and in my stomach, everything was falling into place how I had wanted it to for weeks, but as Amy pull away from me and trailed her lips against my neck, I knew things shouldn’t happen like this. I wanted to remember exactly what I said and how everything happened between us. Even though Amy was willing, her hands roamed up my inner thighs and I shuddered in voluntarily, yes she was definitely willing, she’d hate me even more for not stopping. “Amy. We can’t.” I chewed my bottom lip hard, trying to stick with what I knew was right no matter what my body was screaming at me to do. Amy frowned, straddling my lap. Her nose pressed lightly against mine, her blue eye locked onto my brown as she played with my hair which only seemed to cloud my thoughts now. “But why?”
“Because, we’re both drunk.” I gently lifted Amy off my lap and set her on the bed next to me.
“You seemed okay with this five seconds ago.” Amy started to glare at me, like I had done something wrong. Of course, I was the bad guy here. I always was.
“Shut up and go to bed. We’re both too drunk.”
-_-_-_-
My head pounded as my consciousness brightened at the edges, so hard that there was no graceful guidance into waking up. Last night was all one big black bar to me; I couldn’t even remember what I drank first. Groaning and running my fingers over my eyes and temples, the aching slowly subsiding for a few moments before returning full force. Rolling onto my side, I almost fell of the bed at the sight next to me. Brendan was curled up at the edge of the bed, still sheltered in sleep. Heaving a sigh of relief, I slipped off the bed trying to keep my equilibrium in balance. I knew the second I stepped one way wrong or moved to fast it’d be over.
Moving across the room, I used various pieces of furniture for balance. Pausing at the door, I looked back at Brendan, I was relieved to see he was still in his clothes, and that I was too. That didn’t really mean much, with him anything could happen. He was desperate, and desperation drove men to do stupid things. Shaking my head, I gave Brendan a little respect and didn’t slam the door. Mostly because my own head couldn’t take it.
Carrie and Gustav sat in the kitchen, cradling steaming mugs of hot coffee. “God I hope there’s more of that.” I mumbled. Carrie nodded towards a full pot of coffee as she took a sip of her own mug. Stumbling over, I poured a mug cradling it under my nose. The acidic scent gave life to the dying tendrils of my consciousness and suddenly the day didn’t seem so looming. “What happened last night?”
Gustav gave me a small grin. “I could ask you the same question. Last I saw of you, you were getting cuddling with Brendan.”
I nearly choked on my coffee. “What?” Panic surged through my veins, my heart hammering in my chest. Cuddling led to kissing and kissing led to touching. I wrinkled my nose at the thought of what touching could lead to. I tried to keep cool though and casually set my cup of coffee on the counter leaning back as smoothly as I could. “Yeah well that doesn’t mean anything.”
Carrie giggled a little, trying to cover her laugh with a cough. “Aim, I think Gustav means kissing. You two were going at it pretty good.”
I was glad I wasn’t holding my coffee; it would have been all over the floor. Shutting my eyes, I crossed my arms and dug my nails into my skin. This was wrong, very wrong. Technically I was with Commie, and to everyone’s knowledge but Emily and Ian I was his girl. “Care, that shouldn’t have happened. I’m technically with someone.”
Carrie’s eyes went wide as saucers. “What? Since when?”
I gave Carrie the quick deets, trying not to think too long or hard about what was what in this situation. “So I don’t even know if I could have cheated cause are Commie and I even in a relationship?”
Carrie patted my hand sympathetically. “Well you really aren’t in one, so technically you don’t have to tell. But you don’t want Brendan bragging about what happened, and especially what didn’t. So I think you should tell Mike.”
-_-_-_-
The sun shone lightly against the cold sky, just bright enough to lighten the dark gray that hung over the state during winter, but not enough to warm my skin. I had asked Mike to meet me at his car after practice, and he was sure taking his damned time.
“Hey.” Mike tugged me into a hug, pressing a uick kiss to my cheek. “You have a good weekend?”
“Decent. How about yourself?” Mike nodded, still holding me awkwardly in a hug. I could sense he had something that he wanted to say but didn’t want to bring up, just like I knew he knew I wanted to tell him something. I pulled away, fixing my jacket as an excuse to break the contact.
“What’s wrong? Is it about that kiss? Because I –“
“No. It’s not about that. It’s about what happened over the weekend. I feel so shitty about it, even though we aren’t even dating.” I ran a hand through my hair, really wanting a cigarette. “I was at Carrie’s party, and I drank more than anyone my size ever should in one night and I woke up in bed next to Brendan. We were clothed, and when I talked to Carrie she said he and I had gotten pretty heated with him.”
Mike coughed a little bit, trying to cover up the fact he was clearly frazzled. “Well that’s just going to give Brendan ammo now. My job’s ten times as hard now.” I gnawed on my lip, trying to organize my thoughts. Being hungover and debating with Mike was not boding well for my head.
“Amy! Why’d you leave?!”
Oh. My. God.
I spun on my heel to see Brendan standing at the gate near the Gordie Howe Entrance. He ran across the parking lot, skidding to a stop in front of me. “I just wanted to talk to you about last night, seeing as you’re single and all.” His eyes locked on mine, and I broke contact, finding it hard to look him in the eyes.
“Uhm, excuse me? You’re standing right in front of her boyfriend, and I take offense to that statement.”
“Oh bullshit Mike, I overheard Amy talking to Carrie and goose this morning. I know that yours and Amy’s relationship is a fake.”
Mike grabbed Brendan’s arm and pushed him from in front of me. Glaring, he wound his arm around my waist. “That’s exactly what I told Amy to say. We didn’t want a lot of people to know we were really dating. I mean I do have a reputation to uphold.”
Brendan looked as if he were about to explode. Hs arms shook and his fists were clenched at his sides as a path of red slowly creeping up his neck. Stepping in front of Mike, I held back the smirk as his hands fell to my hips. “Look Brendan. I’m sorry about what happened, but I’m happy with Mike so back the fuck off.”
Once Brendan stalked off, Mike whirled me around to face him. “So, how about it?”
“How about what?” I had every intention of dragging this whole thing out.
Mikes ears burned red. “How about you and I become a couple and actually get to know each other?” I let my arms fall around his neck, nuzzling my nose against his. “I think I could deal with that.”