Sequel: Wrists Intact ›
Hearts Intact
And One Day We'll Get Nostalgic For Disaster
The day after the show we were all getting ready to leave. To my surprise no one had mentioned what I said. I really thought that someone would. I was glad no one had though; I defiantly did not want to talk about that.
Skylar had apologized to me at least a hundred more times but I still wasn’t quite ready to forgive him. I would, in a day or two, just not yet.
I was done packing so right now I was sitting on the dock, looking out at the lake one last time. Even though our time at the resort hadn’t been all that good, I love just looking at the lake, it was just so beautiful!
Suddenly I heard footsteps behind me. I turned around to see Devin coming over to me. Better him than Skylar or Pete. They’d want to talk about serious things. I could always count on Devin to talk about meaningless, insignificant things. And that’s the way I liked it, I hated having serious conversations and I’ve had way too many of them lately.
“Hey princess, you ready to leave?” He asked. I nodded as he sat down next to me.
“Of course I’m ready, I was ready to leave this morning.” I said. Devin grinned and looked out at the lake.
“Do you know what I miss the most about home?” He asked. I looked over at him, thinking. What exactly would he be missing? Defiantly not any of his family members and he didn’t have any other friends besides Jimmy, Skylar and I.
“I don’t know, what do you miss the most?” I asked. Devin took a deep breath as he answered.
“I miss being up in the tower, looking down at the city. I miss the feeling that I get.” He said.
“And what feeling is that?” I asked. He shrugged.
“It’s hard to explain.” He said.
“At least try to explain!” I said. He had me curious now. Personally I didn’t like being up in the Calgary Tower all that much. I’m afraid of heights so the only feeling I get while up in the tower is one of absolute terror.
“Well, I feel like if I can be up that high and be safe, then nothing else can hurt me. When I see the cars in the streets below I feel like I’m actually on this planet for a reason and that maybe I really will make it through life unscarred.” He said. Believe me, I hadn’t been expecting that kind of answer. This was one deep conversation!
“Wow, can’t say I’ve ever had that kind of feeling being up in the tower.” I said. Devin laughed.
“What do you miss the most about home?” He asked. I had to think for a moment. What did I miss the most?
“I miss waking up in the morning and seeing the mountains. I miss knowing that they’re close enough to see but far enough away that we’re in the prairies. I always felt like the mountains were sheltering Calgary from harm.” I said finally. Whoa, where did that answer come from? I defiantly hadn’t meant to say that!
“I honestly cannot wait until we’re back there, even if it is only for a short visit.” Devin said. I nodded.
“Same.” I said. Silence fell over us as we were both lost in our thoughts. After nearly twenty minutes Devin spoke again.
“What are the top five things you want to do before you die?” Devin asked. This question surprised me. Devin usually never wanted to talk about these kinds of things.
“Hmm, I don’t know, I’ll have to think about that one. What about you?” I asked.
“Well, number five is to eat Ice Cream on a boat in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. Number four is to learn how to skateboard properly. Number three is to get a tiger-striped kitten. Number two is to sleep out underneath the stars and number one is to find my real parents.” Devin said. I’d totally forgotten that Devin was adopted. His parents had adopted him when he was two-years-old but Devin had no memory of his birth parents.
“You want to eat Ice Cream in the middle of the Pacific Ocean?” I asked. Devin grinned and nodded.
“Why?” I asked. He shrugged.
“I don’t know why, I’ve just always wanted to!” He said. “Now what are your top five things to do before you die?”
“Well, number five has to be to sneak into a movie. Number four is to visit Halifax and number three is to sit on a garage roof and look up at the stars. Number two is to ride a horse and number one, well, number one is to climb a tree.” I said.
“Your number one thing to do before you die is climb a tree?” Devin asked as if he couldn’t believe it. I nodded.
“There’s plenty around, go ahead!” He said. I shook my head.
“I can’t, I’m terrified of heights. But one day, I want to be able to.” I said. Devin seemed satisfied with that.
“Think we’ll ever be able to do all these things?” He asked. I shrugged.
“I don’t know, I hope so, but I don’t know.” I said. My answer depressed both of us and we fell silent. There just wasn’t anything else to say.
*******
“Izzye was dizzy and she all fell down!” Jimmy sang over and over. I glared at him.
“That doesn’t even make sense!” I said. He grinned and shrugged. Then, to my frustration, he started singing it again.
“Shut-up before I strangle you!” Devin said. Jimmy ignored him and kept singing it. We’d left the resort a week ago and now we were in Vancouver, (Canada at last!) We were currently in the motor home and Jimmy was driving us nuts!
“Izzye was dizzy and she all fell down!” Skylar joined Jimmy in singing that stupid, annoying phrase. I’d forgiven my twin and we were all back to normal now.
“Not you too!” I moaned. Skylar smiled at me but continued singing. Devin smiled and shrugged.
“You got to admit, it has a nice tune to it.” He said. I glared at the traitor and threw a pillow at him. It hit him square in the face.
“I hate you people!” I said. Devin laughed.
“I knew the you people thing was going to start up again!” He said. I stuck my tongue out at him and he stuck his out at me in return.
“Izzye was dizzy and she all fell down!” The three of them sang. Jumping off of the couch I headed for the door.
“God I have to get away from you freaks before I kill you all!” I said as I opened the door. My dearly loved band mates laughed at me.
“We love you too!” They all chorused. I slammed the door and turned around. Immediately I jumped, scared out of my mind. Ryan was standing right there.
“Holy crap you scared me!” I said. He gave me a funny look and then looked at the motor home. The idiots inside were still singing the stupid phrase.
“They sound like they’re having fun.” He said. I rolled my eyes.
“They are so annoying right now!” I said. Ryan smiled slightly and continued gazing at the motor home. It was a little weird.
“Well I was coming over here to find out if you wanted to go for a walk with me.” He said. I looked at him funny.
“Why?” I asked. No one had ever asked me to go for a walk before, no one I knew liked walking!
“Uh, because no one else likes to go for walks.” He said, looking confused. I didn’t think that I had told him that I liked going for walks but apparently I had.
“Uh sure, where to?” I asked. Ryan shrugged and looked away from the motor home to glance over his shoulder.
“Around town.” He said finally. Man, you will never know just how awkward this was!
“Okay, let’s go.” I said. He turned to look at me, looking alarmed. Why, I do not know. Maybe it was another guy thing I will never understand.
“Aren’t you going to tell them?” He asked, sounding as alarmed as he looked. Now I was confused.
“Why? They won’t care as long as I come back sometime tonight.” I said. Skylar had backed off ever since our fight.
“You should tell them!” Ryan insisted. Officially weirded out I opened the door to the motor home.
“I’m going for a walk around town with Ryan!” I said. All I got was a thumbs up and another annoying chorus of,
“Izzye was dizzy and she all fell down!” God they are so annoying!
“There, happy?” I asked, sounding meaner than I meant to. It obviously didn’t bother Ryan though, he just nodded and started walking away. I glared at him as I walked quickly to catch up.
Neither of us said anything as we walked. I found myself wondering why everything was so awkward. That one day back at the resort hadn’t been awkward at all and you’d think that it would’ve been instead of right now. I will never understand how that works, never.
This was my first time in Vancouver and so far, I liked what I’d seen of the city, which wasn’t much. It seemed nice enough, but I’d still pick Calgary over it any day.
“Take my hand.” Ryan said a little while later, holding out his hand. I stared at it and then looked up at his face.
“Why?” I asked. Did he just like holding hands or something? That was all right, I guess, I’d never really liked holding hands though.
“Just do it!” He said irritably. I shook my head. I was tired of people not answering my questions!
“I’d rather not!” I said. He glared at me and went to grab my hand but suddenly someone was falling into him. Both he and I jumped backwards as a group of guys came tumbling out of a house, punches flying everywhere. All of them reeked of alcohol.
I was debating whether or not to jump in and try to stop the fight when suddenly someone grabbed me. Whoever it was covered my mouth with their grimy hand and pulled be backwards, away from the fight and Ryan. And of course, with my luck, no one noticed. (Well, we’ll give Ryan a little bit of credit, it was impossible for him to see through the fighting guys to where I was standing, or had been standing, as I wasn’t standing there anymore.)
The guy pulled me down the sidewalk, (no cars driving by, great, I was going to die!) and into the first alley we came to. I wasn’t scared when Patrick had grabbed me back in Detroit, but believe me, I was scared now. Actually, I was terrified; I hadn’t been this scared in a long time.
Skylar had apologized to me at least a hundred more times but I still wasn’t quite ready to forgive him. I would, in a day or two, just not yet.
I was done packing so right now I was sitting on the dock, looking out at the lake one last time. Even though our time at the resort hadn’t been all that good, I love just looking at the lake, it was just so beautiful!
Suddenly I heard footsteps behind me. I turned around to see Devin coming over to me. Better him than Skylar or Pete. They’d want to talk about serious things. I could always count on Devin to talk about meaningless, insignificant things. And that’s the way I liked it, I hated having serious conversations and I’ve had way too many of them lately.
“Hey princess, you ready to leave?” He asked. I nodded as he sat down next to me.
“Of course I’m ready, I was ready to leave this morning.” I said. Devin grinned and looked out at the lake.
“Do you know what I miss the most about home?” He asked. I looked over at him, thinking. What exactly would he be missing? Defiantly not any of his family members and he didn’t have any other friends besides Jimmy, Skylar and I.
“I don’t know, what do you miss the most?” I asked. Devin took a deep breath as he answered.
“I miss being up in the tower, looking down at the city. I miss the feeling that I get.” He said.
“And what feeling is that?” I asked. He shrugged.
“It’s hard to explain.” He said.
“At least try to explain!” I said. He had me curious now. Personally I didn’t like being up in the Calgary Tower all that much. I’m afraid of heights so the only feeling I get while up in the tower is one of absolute terror.
“Well, I feel like if I can be up that high and be safe, then nothing else can hurt me. When I see the cars in the streets below I feel like I’m actually on this planet for a reason and that maybe I really will make it through life unscarred.” He said. Believe me, I hadn’t been expecting that kind of answer. This was one deep conversation!
“Wow, can’t say I’ve ever had that kind of feeling being up in the tower.” I said. Devin laughed.
“What do you miss the most about home?” He asked. I had to think for a moment. What did I miss the most?
“I miss waking up in the morning and seeing the mountains. I miss knowing that they’re close enough to see but far enough away that we’re in the prairies. I always felt like the mountains were sheltering Calgary from harm.” I said finally. Whoa, where did that answer come from? I defiantly hadn’t meant to say that!
“I honestly cannot wait until we’re back there, even if it is only for a short visit.” Devin said. I nodded.
“Same.” I said. Silence fell over us as we were both lost in our thoughts. After nearly twenty minutes Devin spoke again.
“What are the top five things you want to do before you die?” Devin asked. This question surprised me. Devin usually never wanted to talk about these kinds of things.
“Hmm, I don’t know, I’ll have to think about that one. What about you?” I asked.
“Well, number five is to eat Ice Cream on a boat in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. Number four is to learn how to skateboard properly. Number three is to get a tiger-striped kitten. Number two is to sleep out underneath the stars and number one is to find my real parents.” Devin said. I’d totally forgotten that Devin was adopted. His parents had adopted him when he was two-years-old but Devin had no memory of his birth parents.
“You want to eat Ice Cream in the middle of the Pacific Ocean?” I asked. Devin grinned and nodded.
“Why?” I asked. He shrugged.
“I don’t know why, I’ve just always wanted to!” He said. “Now what are your top five things to do before you die?”
“Well, number five has to be to sneak into a movie. Number four is to visit Halifax and number three is to sit on a garage roof and look up at the stars. Number two is to ride a horse and number one, well, number one is to climb a tree.” I said.
“Your number one thing to do before you die is climb a tree?” Devin asked as if he couldn’t believe it. I nodded.
“There’s plenty around, go ahead!” He said. I shook my head.
“I can’t, I’m terrified of heights. But one day, I want to be able to.” I said. Devin seemed satisfied with that.
“Think we’ll ever be able to do all these things?” He asked. I shrugged.
“I don’t know, I hope so, but I don’t know.” I said. My answer depressed both of us and we fell silent. There just wasn’t anything else to say.
*******
“Izzye was dizzy and she all fell down!” Jimmy sang over and over. I glared at him.
“That doesn’t even make sense!” I said. He grinned and shrugged. Then, to my frustration, he started singing it again.
“Shut-up before I strangle you!” Devin said. Jimmy ignored him and kept singing it. We’d left the resort a week ago and now we were in Vancouver, (Canada at last!) We were currently in the motor home and Jimmy was driving us nuts!
“Izzye was dizzy and she all fell down!” Skylar joined Jimmy in singing that stupid, annoying phrase. I’d forgiven my twin and we were all back to normal now.
“Not you too!” I moaned. Skylar smiled at me but continued singing. Devin smiled and shrugged.
“You got to admit, it has a nice tune to it.” He said. I glared at the traitor and threw a pillow at him. It hit him square in the face.
“I hate you people!” I said. Devin laughed.
“I knew the you people thing was going to start up again!” He said. I stuck my tongue out at him and he stuck his out at me in return.
“Izzye was dizzy and she all fell down!” The three of them sang. Jumping off of the couch I headed for the door.
“God I have to get away from you freaks before I kill you all!” I said as I opened the door. My dearly loved band mates laughed at me.
“We love you too!” They all chorused. I slammed the door and turned around. Immediately I jumped, scared out of my mind. Ryan was standing right there.
“Holy crap you scared me!” I said. He gave me a funny look and then looked at the motor home. The idiots inside were still singing the stupid phrase.
“They sound like they’re having fun.” He said. I rolled my eyes.
“They are so annoying right now!” I said. Ryan smiled slightly and continued gazing at the motor home. It was a little weird.
“Well I was coming over here to find out if you wanted to go for a walk with me.” He said. I looked at him funny.
“Why?” I asked. No one had ever asked me to go for a walk before, no one I knew liked walking!
“Uh, because no one else likes to go for walks.” He said, looking confused. I didn’t think that I had told him that I liked going for walks but apparently I had.
“Uh sure, where to?” I asked. Ryan shrugged and looked away from the motor home to glance over his shoulder.
“Around town.” He said finally. Man, you will never know just how awkward this was!
“Okay, let’s go.” I said. He turned to look at me, looking alarmed. Why, I do not know. Maybe it was another guy thing I will never understand.
“Aren’t you going to tell them?” He asked, sounding as alarmed as he looked. Now I was confused.
“Why? They won’t care as long as I come back sometime tonight.” I said. Skylar had backed off ever since our fight.
“You should tell them!” Ryan insisted. Officially weirded out I opened the door to the motor home.
“I’m going for a walk around town with Ryan!” I said. All I got was a thumbs up and another annoying chorus of,
“Izzye was dizzy and she all fell down!” God they are so annoying!
“There, happy?” I asked, sounding meaner than I meant to. It obviously didn’t bother Ryan though, he just nodded and started walking away. I glared at him as I walked quickly to catch up.
Neither of us said anything as we walked. I found myself wondering why everything was so awkward. That one day back at the resort hadn’t been awkward at all and you’d think that it would’ve been instead of right now. I will never understand how that works, never.
This was my first time in Vancouver and so far, I liked what I’d seen of the city, which wasn’t much. It seemed nice enough, but I’d still pick Calgary over it any day.
“Take my hand.” Ryan said a little while later, holding out his hand. I stared at it and then looked up at his face.
“Why?” I asked. Did he just like holding hands or something? That was all right, I guess, I’d never really liked holding hands though.
“Just do it!” He said irritably. I shook my head. I was tired of people not answering my questions!
“I’d rather not!” I said. He glared at me and went to grab my hand but suddenly someone was falling into him. Both he and I jumped backwards as a group of guys came tumbling out of a house, punches flying everywhere. All of them reeked of alcohol.
I was debating whether or not to jump in and try to stop the fight when suddenly someone grabbed me. Whoever it was covered my mouth with their grimy hand and pulled be backwards, away from the fight and Ryan. And of course, with my luck, no one noticed. (Well, we’ll give Ryan a little bit of credit, it was impossible for him to see through the fighting guys to where I was standing, or had been standing, as I wasn’t standing there anymore.)
The guy pulled me down the sidewalk, (no cars driving by, great, I was going to die!) and into the first alley we came to. I wasn’t scared when Patrick had grabbed me back in Detroit, but believe me, I was scared now. Actually, I was terrified; I hadn’t been this scared in a long time.